You are an ancient god who dates back to the times before history was recorded. Along with your other brothers and sisters, you lived in a time of paradise and happiness. You lived in harmony and ruled over the mortals without a care in the world. Until war broke out. A war that would last for centuries and caused the near extinction of all life in Equestria. During a last ditch effort to defeat your enemy you receive a grievous wound to your already tired and withered out body, which caused your body to turn to stone. Where your body would repair itself and recover your lost energy. However it's been centuries since the war, the world and people you had once known and loved has faded into history along with your existence, but the world has gone too long without you and it's about time you return.

Need help with grammar, please comment if you see any mistakes. I'm sure there are a lot.
Anthro- ponies still have horns, wings, etc
Some chapters will be comment driven

Twilight Sparkle, Princess Celestia's most prized and faithful student, is being sent to Ponyville to learn about the magic of friendship.

And she's not happy about it.

Hear what Celestia has to say back! Check out the spinoff:
Responses To A Disgruntled Friendship Student by keaton-furman-prower

Still want more? Have a multiverse spinoff by MixMassBasher, my contributing writer for Seasons 5-9.
Letters From Across the Disgruntled Multiverse

Editing by Neko Majin C.

Disclaimer:
The following is a work of parody, and is protected as Fair Use under section 17 U.S. Code § 107 of US Copyright Law. My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic and all affiliated characters are property of Hasbro Inc.

The name's Diane, Private Eye. I'm the stickiest gumshoe in all of Manehattan, with an addiction to danger (and chocolate). Hot on the trail of a missing foal, a feeling deep in my twitchy-tail tells me I'm about to crack the case wide open. Unfortunately, I may need the help of my weirdo "friends" to do it... but who knows, maybe I'll change my mind about friendship after an epic character arc.

Oops. Sorry for breaking the fourth wall there, but you can blame Mom for that one. After all, I'm just a half-bit mimeo of the #horsefamous Bearer of Laughter.

I mean, it's not like I have a soul, or anything.

Inspired by "The Heart of Saturday Night", a minific written by No Raisin for the June 2018 Writeoff.

Being subtle isn't Rainbow Dash's strong suit. At all. So when Applejack asks her point blank what she thinks of Rarity, she doesn't hold back.

Not her best idea.

Pre-Read by: SapphireColors | LoneUnicornWriter

Reading by LandonWho

Celestia and Scootaloo are homeless in a Ponyville alleyway together. They like to talk about things.

These are the things they talk about.

Note: The crayon scribbles of a plot is done, but the ride never ends story still updates.