Twilight Sparkle is being sent to Ponyville to learn about friendship. She's not happy about it.
Dear Equestria,
Just a friendly reminder that you don't have to have a super special somepony to enjoy Hearts and Hooves Day.
So go out, stay in, doesn't matter! Don't be above celebrating and loving yourself!
Happy Hearts and Hooves Day, everypony!
Disclaimer: This public service announcement brought to you by the Mares For Masturbation Association.
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That was short.
*notices disclaimer*
oh
I have already made plans for Singles Awareness Day.
It's also KMS Bismarck's birthday so there'll be lots of Sabaton as well.
11506476
Yup. Best friend and I are grilling up steaks tomorrow, just like Singles Awareness Day last year
11506479
I'll join you in spirit!
Will there be an article regarding the Hippogriff spy balloon hovering over Equestria?
Happy Hallmark Holiday everypony!
11506938
That would be amusing, but that stupid balloon thing is most likely fear mongering because countries spy on each other all the time.
Oh God. Missed opportunity for this joke: It's not even just mares. Just like Pipp said in her Make Your Mark song. "All you need is your meat."