Letters From A Disgruntled Friendship Student

by milesprower06

Rock Solid Friendship (Mixed, Massed, & Bashed)

Dear Rarity,

So, I take it you’re going to mine in another location for rarer gems?

Your loyal servant,
Spike

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Dear Spike,

You’re kidding right, darling? Maud is the only known pony with a rocktorate in rock science.

As if somepony can tell the difference between common gems from rarer gems. What they don’t know won’t hurt them.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ll be kickstarting a global monopoly of selling these shitty rocks.

Your soon to be millionaire,
Rarity De Beers

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Dear Princess Twilight,

So, I just met Pinkie’s sister. Was Pinkie adopted??? I mean the only relation I can see in them is that Maud likes stones while Pinkie is stoned.

Funnily enough, she mentioned that we met before though I initially could not put my hoof on it… Oh yeah, she help me enslaved Our Town. Oh yeah… Awkward...

We got along well, Maud and I apparently dissed Discord once before. And if anypony has the balls to do that has earned my respects.

I also got the chance to talk about how great kites are. They speak to me the most. They get stuck in trees just like how I’m stuck in Ponyville. My personal favorite kite was the one shaped like you princess, I always fly it into a thunderstorm and see it burn to ashes.

Also, Pinkie really needs to get a restraining order on her.

But then Maud left. I blame Pinkie. Honestly, do you and your friends have to mess with every friend I try to make? What’s up with that?

Your ex-student,
Starlight Glimmer

P.S. I’ll be researching how magic affects the properties of rocks with Maud. Nothing for you to fret over.

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Dear Starlight,

When my sister was at your village why didn’t you take her cutie mark?

Your friend,
Pinkie Pie,

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Dear Sister,

My cutiemark represents my understanding of rocks.

That did not necessarily mean I could not grind her to a bloody pulp and throw her scattered remains across Equestria once she took it.

Your sister,
Maud

Author's Note:

I decided not to add or amend anything here, because this is the farewell chapter of MixMassBasher, my co-author for the past two years.

Starting next chapter, I'm back to a solo act, and it's honestly going to feel pretty weird.

Best of luck with wherever life takes you, Mix. I can't thank you enough for your contributions to this story.

Comments

[SuperPinkBrony12]

Dear Sister,

My cutiemark represents my understanding of rocks.

That did not necessarily mean I could not grind her to a bloody pulp and throw her scattered remains across Equestria once she took it.

Your sister,
Maud

Well actually, considering the spell Starlight cast seemed to take away anything that made the individual unique, she could probably take away Maud's strength with little effort.

[MixMassBasher]

8442669
Maybe....

[Neko Majin C]

My dearest Mistress Princess Twilight Sparkle,

I apologize for not doing my duties this past week, but, if you recall, a... Manticore... tore the hell out of my ass. On a separate note, maybe my plan to brainwash Flurry Heart was misguided. But, maybe, next time you babysit her, could I possibly have time off for the duration of her stay? She does not really like me and I do not want to be traumatized by her traumatize her again.

Signed your loyal slave who will never be a groom and recent Manticore victim,
Neko Majin C.

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~KBO.

[Crazy the Clone]

...That reminds me. I gotta get to work on that Maud story.

Anyway, Great to see this back, and sad to see your co-author leave. Anyway, good luck!

[milesprower06]

8448881
He may return after finals. Not sure if he worded that wrong, he may have commitments to attend to after finals as well

[Crazy the Clone]

8449462
I know that. Real life takes priority over writing fanfiction.

[milesprower06]

8449633
Yep, which is why I frequently go months without any story updates here.

[gakposter]

Kinda miss Twilight monolouging and just being a shitty person.

[Lord-of-Rhodor]

8443115
*sigh* Buddy, I'd advise that you take some self-defense courses and learn how to say no to Twilight. Failing that, invest in a comprehensive medical insurance package.

Yours in Risky Careers,

Lieutenant Colonel Chrysanthemum, 107th Lunar Marines

[titanhades70]

Considering there's a very real possibility that Starlight was just as powerful than as she is now, Maud wouldn't have stood a chance.