Letters From A Disgruntled Friendship Student

by milesprower06

Leap of Faith

Letters From A Disgruntled Friendship Student
by milesprower06

Leap of Faith

Dear Mom and Dad,

Why the fuck did you name us Flim and Flam? Were we a joke from birth? Maybe if you actually named the two of us after something honest, we would have been able to do something with our lives.

Because maybe you didn't notice, but what you name your offspring kinda has a small effect on what cutie marks they get. What other names did you pass up? Sham and Scam?

So I guess we'll just have to continue using dishonest means to sell our products.

Thanks for nothing,
Flim and Flam

FOAL FREE PRESS
RACISM IN PONYVILLE

The Golden Oaks Library was struck by lightning last night after Rainbow Dash claimed she was sick and tired of all the racist remarks from Princess Twilight Sparkle. Responding to the increasing unrest, Celestia has insisted Twilight issue a formal apology.

She has done so in the form of a new charity; the Flip Flap Wing Ding Foundation for Sensitivity to Pegasi or Whatever.

When Applejack inquired as to an Earth Pony charity, Twilight simply scoffed and walked back inside.

Comments

[Starlight Shadow]

That's our Twilykins.

[Henki Pie]

Sure is nice to have some good letters.
Great joob.

[milesprower06]

4153421 That isn't even on my list of ships. I chose this joke over a CMC threesome joke. That's all, lol.

[cealdra]

4153429
Then what IS your sweetie-ship?
+ perhaps?

[milesprower06]

4153473 I need a ship for everypony?

[Scarheart]

She has done so in the form of a new charity; the Flip Flap Wing Ding Foundation for Sensitivity to Pegasi or Whatever.

Not that Seven Colbert had any influence on the name of the organization, or anything...

[FanOfMostEverything]

Meh. The Flimflam brothers just need to learn of the wonders of the asterisk*.

*These statements have not been verified by the Food and Drug Administration. Use only as directed. Possible side effects include night sweats, dry mouth, day sweats, wet mouth, vomiting, not vomiting, suicidal overconfidence, spontaneous musical numbers, itching, hives, anthills, parasprites, loss of swag and/or mojo, time paradoxes, eye lasers, Lavender Unicorn Syndrome, spontaneous aging, and gullibility. If side effects persist for four or more hours, take more Flimflam Miracle Curative Tonic™. Void where prohibited. Some restrictions may apply. Do not fold, spindle, or mutilate.

[Ms_Fruit_Bat]

4153555

[cealdra]

4153480

Sure you do =] I even got alternative ships for everyone

[Spartan-Guy 88]

Dear Everypony who bought Flim and Flam's tonic,

Are you serious? Did you all forget that those two nearly drove us off of our own farm a while back? Oh wait, now I remember; you were all way too busy getting wasted off of whoever's cider you were buying from.

You ponies have got to be the most easily swayed crowd in the history of Equestria.

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to take this oddly glowing bit what's-his-name gave me and buy some pot so I can blaze it up and let my problems float away.

420 Bitches,
Applejack

[Not Here Anymore]

lets see 102 chapters then - the 16 chapters that are bonus and other chapters not episodes = 86 oh well then you don't have 100 real episode chapters and there is only 86 episodes by the leap of faith one.

[SuperPinkBrony12]

Well, this one was unexpected.

[MythrilMoth]

So is this your way of saying the episode was so boring you couldn't even work with it?

[MythrilMoth]

4153633 What a pointless comment! Isn't this such a beautifully pointless comment? I'd love to print out this pointless comment and make a poster out of it! That's a brilliantly pointless comment!

[Mike the Red]

4153597 "Mine's got rocks in it!"

[Ponyninja88]

I wonder how long until Twilight starts going after the Foal free press

[Wandering Pony]

This is the best thing ever.

[Phazon]

Great, just what we need: a satirical character based off of Disgruntled Twilight named Twilight (2nd t is silent) Sparkle. Ching-Chong would be proud.

4153597
Dear Applejack,
Last time I checked, the first Flim Flam contraption actually worked. Your redneck family was just too poor to afford it, and the rest of us had to save your asses from bankruptcy. That reminds me, if you've been so worried about money for the past three years, where the hell did Granny Smith find a giant bag of bits to pay for all that tonic? Your financial planning is atrocious.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have this stupid charity to run for another lesser race.

-Twilight Sparkle

[ShittyMKSound]

the Flip Flap Wing Ding Foundation for Sensitivity to Pegasi or Whatever.

#CANCELSPARKLE

[milesprower06]

4154026 Over my dead body.

[Phoenix_Dragon]

If Flim and Flam are upset with their names, at least they can take comfort that they aren't named Silver Shill. There's a career-limiting name if I ever saw one.

[ShittyMKSound]

4154030

Oooh, I'm sorry "this Flim Flam sidekick" ruined your "good fun". I'm sorry I criticized your "satire", even though its actually racist bigotry against Pegasi!

Fimfiction, I'M NOT YOUR PEGASI SIDEKICK!

To book me for rallies, please contact me at [e-mail].

[TheApexSovereign]

4154026 You are the best kind of people

[SuperPinkBrony12]

4154247 Not really, it was Apple Bloom's dream. Luna was just looking in, and liked what she saw from the looks of things.

[Brandon Sky]

4154367
Yeah, I just realized that actually probably was a reference to that at the time. I had totally forgotten about it.

[StormLuna]

I've only read the first two and I have already liked and faved this. I have a whole lot more to read. Excellent work!

[Gapeagle]

That last part. Haha! GJ, Miles GJ!

[Phazon]

Alright, I have to ask. Is there any other reason for all the 420 jokes about this episode, besides the obvious? Granted, the sheer number of Ponyvillians that just happened to be ailing at the time of this episode makes one contemplate whether any would benefit from medicinal marijuana, but it's not like any of the background ponies were noticeably stoned...

Maud Pie should've been episode 20. I don't have anything witty to add to that, but I'm saying that right now.

Dear Granny Smith,
How did you survive that?!
Sincerely,
Gwen Stacy

[re- Yamsmos]

I was going to come up with a witty comment, but I've apparently been beaten to the punch ten-fold.

[SuperPinkBrony12]

4154663 Dear Gwen Stacy,

Any more questions?

[Ramenclaw]

#CancelColbert? I love you Miles!

[Bookmark88]

4154305 The fact that Luna Liked what she saw would imply that she is, in fact, a pedophile.

Unless AB was dreaming/fantasizing about Sweetie when they were grown mares, which is a possibility.

would like word of miles on this if he isn't too busy.

Course, I could just be complaining because I ship Marshmallow Jr. with the word's Most Adorable Chicken Nugget

[Eclipse LunarSol]

That.....makes sense. I wonder why ponies don't use that to their advantage?

[Alaborn]

Applejack is an idiot. Knowing the tonic was nothing more than apple juice and mint leaves, she should have made her own. "Applestar Energy Drink! With guarana and ginseng! And enough caffeine to stop Big Mac from falling asleep after... well, never you mind that!"

[Willmar]

Looks like 'Letters' is currently featured on the front page of Fimfiction atm.

[milesprower06]

4155719 If I go longer than 5-7 days without updating, it usually does because of the heat level. (The last three slots of the feature box are for story updates).

[Willmar]

4155728 Ah, I see. I don't really pay much attention to details like that. I'll keep it in mind in the future, though.

[treos]

4155741 ...i'm gonna be honest here...i thought you avatar was some creatures butt at first glance cause of how the nose looks in that tiny avatar thumbnail next to the comments, glad i was mistaken.

and i just thought of something. if lightning never strikes the same place twice does that also apply to lightning caused by pegasi or would that just be in regions like the everfree where nature is about as crazy as discord?

[SuperPinkBrony12]

4156035 I'm pretty sure that it was suppose to be "railed". Or the typo was intended to be obvious.

[James Rye]

After 100 chapters, Twi's rascists and sexy needs gets a bit tad boring. Actually a lot boring. Actually a WHOLE lot boring. Actually...I think the horse is beaten to death, Can we have some new gig pls? Like I dunno, money-hungry AJ selling her bro for sex and her sis for work or Rare using little china ponies as slave workers or stuff like that? Or at least add something new to Twi to laugh about her?

[Chaotic Ink]

Steve Colbert joke is best joke!

[Phazon]

4157804
According to the mythological lore, griffons were known to mate for life and live out the rest of their lives alone if their mates died, so they aren't a very social species. A lot of pony fans picked up on that a very long time ago, and there are plenty of old sad fics on this site featuring lonely Gilda, so you got that part right.

But after checking the episode's transcript, I found no evidence that Gilda's visit was unannounced. And as for the pranks, Rainbow herself said that they weren't intended specifically for Gilda, but for any ponies that stumbled into them. Gilda just happened to stumble into every single one of them, either by dumb luck or her own obnoxious behavior.

Finally, Gilda's antisocial behavior toward everyone but Rainbow Dash may have been a nod to the lore on griffons (which would suggest some deeper feelings toward the latter), but I highly doubt that Rainbow saw her as anything more than an old friend. After all, she was clearly outraged at the way Gilda mistreated her new friends, and she didn't feel the least bit heartbroken about showing her old friend the door for it.

[Lag Incarnate]

This... is the Coltbert Report.
25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lvpjozpPFW1qc7rfgo1_500.png

[JustAnAcquaintance]

no evolution jokes about earth ponies falling from high places? i'm disappointed.

[Bronze Statue]

4153590 You know, technically Discord x Changeling is the ultimate ship. Between the two, they cover all of the bases. Literally.

[cealdra]

4161494
That would be a good failsafe to fall back on should i ever run dry of ships.
Though otp remains

[Blood Brandy]

Too all you racist pony folk, this all must be some sort of joke,

You seek a cure for whatever ails, and my brews and tinctures never fail,

And turn to tricksters tried and true, who once made fools of all of you,

But you always run me out with a frown, from this stupid back-water little town,

Yet is greater cities, my potions are found, to sell and work with great renown,

Easing ills and pains for all, far and away, as my coffers grow larger with each passing day,

But none of you will know of my mixture aids, for my presence from this town now fades.

I've left this town as you all desired, to sink in your ignorant little quagmire,

So remember while you all stay injured and sick, that if I had one, you could all suck my dick

Since you so long ago decided to burn those bridges, I'll happily part with the words, "I'm rich, suck it bitches!"

-Zecora

[Sozmioi]

Was Twilight Sparkle even IN this episode? I think we saw more of Lyra than her.

Anyway, the big takeaway lesson from this that AJ could have used?

"I said it seemed to work for my grandma, for at least one thing. And it did. Y'all go learn some statistics before you think that means more than wishful thinking, or I'll have my brother get out his fancy mathematics."

[keaton-furman-prower]

Dear Flim and Flam:

Why the hell do you even bother negotiating with those mud ponies? You're unicorns! Use those horns of yours to enslave them or something!

Your racist princess, Twilight Sparkle

[Not Here Anymore]

Dear Princess Twilight Sparkle,

Why don't you overthrow Celestia and Luna by sending them to the sun and moon then make cadence a star up in space forgotten among the others. Oh and your friends lock them up in a jail they can not break out of. Then anypony who complains lock them up in a cell which they can not break out of.

From,
Electric Brony