Letters From A Disgruntled Friendship Student

by milesprower06

Bonus Chapter: A Business Opportunity

Dear Princess Twilight,

Hey, Twi. Sunset here. You told me to keep an ear to the ground for any inter-dimensional business opportunities.

Well, I've got one.

I need you to use whatever Princessly authority you've got, and raid every single hospital and pharmacy in Ponyville. Get me all the ivermectin you can get your hooves on, and send it through the portal.

Sincerely,
Sunset Shimmer

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Dear Sunset,

Ivermectin? The de-worming medication? Just what the fuck is going on over—

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Twilight,

Please don't ask. Just do it.

You want 20% of the profits? Because I'm potentially sitting on a Celestia-damned gold mine here.

Just get it to me.

-Sunset

Comments

[Level Dasher]

Because of course Sunset would take advantage of that situation. She should’ve just told Twi what was up. Disgruntled Twilight wouldn’t question it; she’d probably encourage it!

[milesprower06]

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derpicdn.net/img/view/2021/8/31/2690767.jpg

[Rawislon03]

If there’s one thing Twilight’s going to profit off of, it’ll be humans drugging themselves into a diarrhoea coma.

[Charlie_K]

10962622
I saw that picture and immediately had my own thought for one. Twilight explaining that ivermectin is a horse medication, not a jackass medication.

[Streakofscarlet]

I was going to say "I love how Sunset can interrupt Twilight mid-letter" before realizing they're probably using the magic journal.

Also, there's a joke in here somewhere about Sunset asking her pony friend for horse medication

[Aariadon]

Dear Sunset:

Can you make your letters longer? FimFiction won't automatically mark this chapter as read!

- Twilight

[Eurvos Morgenbrise]

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Twilight,

Go to the main page and click the chapter's checkbox, dumbass!

-Sunset

(Not actually calling you a dumbass, but Sunset would call Twilight one for that.)

[waser]

I wonder the portal would turn it into the human version. It probably wouldn’t. I think the portal is disgruntled as well.

[Neko Majin C]

Dear Starship Trooper, Sunlight Setter, Stone Cold Stunner, Sunslut Squirter,

No matter what they have been telling you, Ivermectin does not work that way. However, I guess if you are just using it in a diabolic get rich quick scheme, it will do what you intend it to, steal stupid people's money. And probably kill a few people who take it too far. If that is the case, then good luck "culling the herd" as it were.

Signed Mistress Headmistress Empress Dictator Princess Twilight Sparkle's loyal slave and dedicated de-wormer,
Neko Majin C.

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~KBO.

[justheretoreadstories]

I'm surprised this chapter's comment section hasn't turn into a flame war.

[milesprower06]

10978100
It used to back in the day. One chapter I tore into both sides of US politics, and the comment section lit the hell up.

Certainly calmer around here nowadays.

[StormLuna]

10978549

Some other user wrote a story about Twilight being on earth and having to get some ivermectin because she got worms from eating too much Chipotle. Damn that comment section turned into a shit storm.

[Chaotic Ink]

11011954
...fair enough; continue