• Published 7th Jun 2012
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Letters From A Disgruntled Friendship Student - milesprower06



Twilight Sparkle is being sent to Ponyville to learn about friendship. She's not happy about it.

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Griffon the Brushoff

Letters From A Disgruntled Friendship Student
by milesprower06

Griffon the Brushoff

Dear Princess Celestia,

Today, I learned a few things. One, Pinkie is not just a drug addict, but also an annoying, pranking bitch. I was working on a formula designed to increase the intensity of orgasms, when they swapped my ink with disappearing ink, and thus my recipe was lost. Just fucking great.

I've also learned that inter-species breeding is indeed possible, as Rainbow introduced a friend that must be the result of a lion fucking an eagle or something. She's not bad. I mean, she got easily pissed at Pinkie, so she's gotta be right in the head. She even taught that weak-willed Fluttershy a lesson when she wouldn't get out of her damn way. Who leads baby ducks right down the center of main street anyway?

So after Gilda sent her hippie drug candy cane helicopter spinning out of control, Pinkie came to me to complain. Why the hell would she think that I want to hear her jealous ranting? I encouraged her to get professional help for her addiction, but she just left all huffy, claiming she could quit anytime she wanted.

In what must have been another drug-fueled high, Pinkie decided she would get revenge by throwing her a party. With even more pranks. So, um, yeah, basically the most cold-hearted, annoying revenge ever.

As expected, Pinkie acted all innocent through the pranks, as Gilda got more and more pissed. And when she finally snapped, Rainbow revealed that it was her! Pinkie was just the one that threw the party. Someone bullies you and wrecks your helicopter. So throw them a party.

Yeah, like I said. Drugs.

And I think Rainbow could totally form an indie rock band or something.

Your former, non-druggie student,
Twilight Sparkle

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