Letters From A Disgruntled Friendship Student

by milesprower06

Apple Family Reunion

Letters From A Disgruntled Friendship Student
by milesprower06

Apple Family Reunion

Dear Princess Celestia,

So I hear the Apples are having a family reunion. Gee, I wonder how much inbreeding will take place during that.

Your former student who is not from down south,
Twilight Sparkle

Dear Twilight,

You're one to talk, Miss I-Want-My-Brother-To-Fuck-Me-Senseless.

-Applejack

P.S. Pa, I hope you're enjoying the afterlife. Who would've thought that your floozy of a marefriend would make you climax so hard it'd give you a heart attack?

~Racist barn, racist barn
One, two, three, four
Let's build upon this redneck farm,
One, two, three, four
Up up up, prejudice
We won't reconsider this
This new barn'll draw quite the crowd
But Zecora's not allowed

Comments

[Obsidian]

These are just getting odder and odder... and a bit more raunchy too.

[FloydienSlip]

There's the wonderful lol humor I've been missing!

[Sparklight]

Lawl. I love these things.

[Sharky]

Ha

[JTheWhiteKnight]

Geez AJ, why so hostile? Jealous that your hunk of a brother isn't also a Prince?

[SuperPinkBrony12]

Should've known you'd crack a joke about "Racist Barn".

Next up is "Spike at Your Service". Let's see what you're planing on posting that you think will tick everyone off.

Also it looks like Applejack is now an offical redneck Southerner. At the least it's only played for humor.

[DrOblivian]

short, simple, to the point. I LIKE IT!!! ANOTHER!!!

[FanOfMostEverything]

You're racing through these with little abandon. You might want to take it easy with the next couple, you're running out.

[Roarin Thunder]

No words for how much laughter was just had

[Iryelb]

Super table flip
media.tumblr.com/tumblr_masl2lZkKo1r3oznx.gif

[Rozen Knight]

STOP KILLING US WITH FUNNY!

[Namara]

The Zecora line is the best.

[milesprower06]

2154285 I am aware of how many I have left. Spike At Your Service is already on the site, awaiting publishing.

I am not going to slow my pace because of how far away Season 4 is. I have other projects as well, The Night Is Darkest and Cupcake Chronicles Side Stories to name two.

[Biker_Dash]

AJ needs to go back to clopping her brother off in the shower!

[musicalreader]

Ah told that zebra that we don't want her kind around our farm... So far she's stayed away........ Now if we could just get them unicorns to quit usin' their fancy mathematics and magic and let us do everything the Earth Pony way, we'd be just fine.

[Red Bomber]

How did AJ knew about Twilight's particular letter, namely this one? I'm sure everyone knows about Twilight's problem with Shining but is Princess Celestia trolling Twilight by sending copies of all the letters she's been receiving from her to her friends?

[kingtiger666]

Bucking ziggers. Send all back to Zebrica, where they belong!

[Mossflower]

But Zecora's not allowed

golden

[anacreon]

Oh my god I lost it at the racist barn lyrics.

[Phazon]

2154313 I'm guessing that once you do hit Magical Mystery Cure, this story's status will be kept constantly as either Incomplete or On Hiatus until the series finale, with subsequent chapters put up within days of the corresponding episodes in future seasons. Unless of course life gets in the way or something. Eh, details, right?

[milesprower06]

2154434 I am planning on putting the status to On Hiatus upon Magical Mystery Cure's publishing.

[MemoryLane]

2154463 More like "Master Plan".

[Shanenator]

I get the feeling you didn't like this episode very much.

[milesprower06]

2154476 It's not that. I have taken to heart some of the complaints that letters written by others aren't as funny as the ones written by Twilight. Others have also said that some of the humor is lost on them when the others act as raunchy as Twilight. So here I attempted to make concessions, providing a Twilight letter to an episode she did not appear in.

[FanOfMostEverything]

2154313 Fair enough.

[Pvt PartyPooper]

i.imgur.com/YV0St.png

[Bad_Seed_72]

Lawl! Yes!

[milesprower06]

2154587 I suddenly feel civil and clean.

[Chuck Baleigh]

The song at the end?
Jesus, I couldn't think of something better.
You have a nice amount of cleverness.

[Blue_Paladin42]

HAW!

This might be my favorite one yet.

[EddWar]

[BBJBS]

2154587 Like I say: Ceterum censeo 4chan delendam esse.

Yes, I realize that's terrible Latin. Bite me.

[Kaidan]

130 words.
don't worry, there's a great inbreeding joke.
ah saw the sex tape of you and shining
...
now, every pony into the racist barn, it's canon now. Better lock up before Zecora, Gilda, Iron Will, or buffalo show up!

You continue to make my day with these letters, even when they are short they are hilarious.

[Xuncu]

Heh heh~

[L_Wolf]

Hehehe

[averagejoey2000]

Raze this barn.

[WanderingPony]

2154881

Well, they have lost one, two, three, four...

[infinite scratch]

We need a zecora episode

[Darkunicorn666]

i can't stop laughing

[MrNumbers]

Dear Applejack

Et tu. brute?

Your friend Twilight.

Dear Twilight

Maybe you're just so powerful because you're so much hornier than other unicorns?

Your concerned friend Applejack

To Applejack

Buck me sideways, like one of your trees, damn it. Or ask Rainbow Dash if she could do it in twenty seconds for me. Pinkie'd be up for it, I guess, but I haven't finished studying magical protection yet.

From your friend in need Twilight

To Twilight

I've been waiting to say this for a long time now. Go buck yourself sugarcube

I didn't learn anything.

Applejack

To Applejack

Since when did you learn how to read, let alone write? Learning doesn't seem to be your thing. I'm the student and the master here.

From better-than-you orange-white-trash Twilight

To Twilight

I've been helpin'!

Applebloom

[Stormwatch]

I understand the song says "racist porn, racist porn".

[TolianTiger]

2155573

[rphb]

You know when I thought about this comic when I read this. Was it your inspiration? fc06.deviantart.net/fs71/i/2013/010/7/2/stupid_race_by_mrbastoff-d5r2cj6.png

[Midnight Jazz]

2155746

Oh, yeah. I can see that now. Just your average porno, two or three (or seven) people going at it, and just out of nowhere the guy from those old visine commercials just walks out, and in that deadpan voice of his just starts telling the viewers how brown people are the root cause of everything wrong with the world. While the people are still fucking right beside him.
...
I think I might need to make some calls. This shit would sell like hotcakes in the south.

[fluttershywriter]

Best letter of season 3. By far.

[ChilliConCharlie]

This new barn'll draw quite the crowd
But Zecora's not allowed

CRYING WITH LAUGHTER

[keaton-furman-prower]

Dear Applejack:

At least I know how to perform Contraceptive spells! Which is one of the many reasons why we unicorns are the master race.

Your racist-er-than-thou "friend," Twilight Sparkle.

P.S.: While you and I may disagree about may things, it's definitely true that Zecora should be shunned whenever possible.

.

Dear Twilight Sparkle:

We don't allow snobby Unicorn floozies either

Your unfriendly neighborhood redneck, Applejack.

[The Rarispy]

Well, that's... an interesting way to die.

[FashionablyHospitable]

2165343 Aye.

[Gamer Script]

I'm black and I still found the 'Racist Barn' thing freaking hilarious.

Poor Zecora though