Twilight Sparkle is being sent to Ponyville to learn about friendship. She's not happy about it.
Letters From A Disgruntled Friendship Student
by milesprower06
Hiatus Bonus Chapter
THE FOAL FREE PRESS
THE SHAWFLANK REDEMPTION
We here at the Foal Free Press have discovered that it is a tricky endeavor to smuggle in items needed for a prison break. We were stopped at the metal detector, which really sucked because we figured we were home free after successfully getting through the bullshit detector. But we suppose it's just as well. If we made it through the metal detector, I don't think Sweetie Belle would have made it through the Sentience Scanner.
Regardless of the “horror stories” that come out of Ponyville Juvenile Correctional Facility (I really don't understand what is so scary about ponies who can't hold on to their bars of soap), Scootaloo claims she is enjoying life “in the joint”, claiming she's now worth two packs of cigarettes. I can't help but wonder if she's gotten involved in the warden's bit laundering scheme. I hear he also has really shitty anti-virus software in another dimension.
So now that our first idea failed, Sweetie Belle suggested getting sent to juvy herself, and came up with an ingenious escape plan that she would put into an extremely intricate tattoo all over her body. We scrapped that idea too, once I told her that with how long the tattoo would take to get made, in addition with how long it would take her to get into the prison due to Equestria's judicial system, that Scootaloo would be out by then. The final nail in the coffin was when I told her that the prison nurse wasn't into filly unicorns either.
So leaving Scootaloo to her last comfortable month of incarceration, Sweetie Belle and I scratched our skulls wondering what to do, because aside from reporting on the latest and greatest happening around Ponyville, our days are mostly filled with making fun of an orphaned pegasus who can't fly. Maybe we can actually get press passes for the castle now. We were kind of forbidden from coming within 500 yards of the castle when we released Discord a year-and-a-half ago, but now that he's released again and reformed, maybe Celestia and Luna have had a change of heart. More on that later!
NEXT ISSUE:
EXCLUSIVE INSIDE SCOOP: DISCORD, CHAOS MASTER OR LOWLY SEXUAL SERVANT?
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Oh geez.
no new episodes and still with the updates!!! i love you.
Ah, Prison Break. I remember watching that show back in high school, along with a lot of other shows I used to watch on Fox. Now that they've all ended, the only one I still watch anymore in Bones... That's all I've got.
I just don't understand DisLestia. They have little, no, NOTHING in common.
EXCLUSIVE INSIDE SCOOP: DISCORD, CHAOS MASTER OR LOWLY SEXUAL SERVANT?
... These are not mutually exclusive things.
You might as well change the status back to "Incomplete" if you're gonna keep writing these type of chapters.
You could probably right a standalone just with this kind of article.
2285545
They each have six limbs, two eyes, a tail, and ridiculous hairdos.
Also they're really old.
I just finished the final episode of that show the other day. Don't know why I didn't start watching it sooner
so scoots is a prison bitch now? I put up with the incest, the drugs, the racism jokes, and the 9/11 joke. but a pedophilia is past my comfort zone. luckily I have ways of repressing such memories. not to sound rude or anything, I am sure other readers are more comfortable with that sort of joke than I am. see you at next update.
2285650 It's a juvenile facility. That's not pedo.
Trust me, I wouldn't be able to imply pedo and keep it rated teen.
Ha! Prison Break refs are pure win. Still as amusing as ever, these.
2285568 No, it will stay "On Hiatus" because these ideas could cease at anytime.
I love you. Platonically. I think.
Fan art time! Someone needs to draw Sweetie Belle with Schofield's tattoo.
2285670 That would be the first piece of fanart Letters has gotten, lol.
2285657Sorry, that part slipped my mind for some reason. still a bit uncomfortable though.
on an unrelated note. I agree with the other commenters; you do stories like this in a spin off, maybe when season four starts? um, if that's not to much trouble::
Great chapter and is the Sentience Scanner a reference to Friendship is Witchcraft? Despite no new episodes I am really enjoying these bonus chapters.
Dat MacAfee joke?
2285680 Not sure. The spin-off is right now, as far as I'm concerned. No clue how long I'll be able to keep this up.
And with 26 season 4 episodes on a [hopefully] weekly basis will keep me busy enough to not do bonus chapters simultaneously.
*looks at that last line* Can't wait to read the next one!
2286168 Sorry if it's not for you, but it says Alternate Universe at the top for a reason.
Edit: And that may be the first downvote that I may actually be able to identify.
the last few chapters should be a spin off title, its a good story though.
2286283 Not any other. Just the ones that cause more problems than they solve.
2286235
Thanks!
Have a Moustache
2285545
We're bronies. We've shipped Rainbow Dash with a watermelon, DisLestia's nothing.
Yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes!
2285545
Agree, let's ship Discord and Luna, at least it's less often used ship than DisLestia and PinkieCord.
A big YAY for Hiatus Bonus Chapters
2286820 We also shipped Fluttershy with a bowl of soup.
2287097
And RD with a kitchen sink.
2287114 What... Link... NAO... PL0X...
2287122
But the Kitchen Sink
I haven't actually read it. Just going by the description.
2286962 What about Fluttercord, no one seems intrested in shiping them even after "Keep Calm and Flutter On".
2287502
I see them only as a friends, nothing more
Sex slave.
2287154 It's exactly what it sounds like.
2287615 I really feel like it could work. You know kind of like a beauty and the beast type of story.
2287684 Why can't he be both?
2288222
Maybe you're right...but for me Sparity is more like "Beauty and the Beast" type than Fluttercord. At least Spike isn't immortal and all-powerful Spirit of Chaos.
2288493 Discord was pretty much a loner before he became friends with Fluttershy. Most ponies never came near him because he was a draconques (I probably spelled that wrong) and what few ponies did he drove away with his antics. He esentially believed that "If those ponies are going to fear me then I'll give them a reason to fear me!" and hence he started using his powers to make ponies lives miserable.
2288279 Well played.
All hail Discord, chaotic neutral master of sexual servitude.
2288527
Yeah that's most likely how it was. About Fluttercord.
Let's just compare them.
Discord as i say earlier is immortal and all-powerful Spirit of Chaos who likes to make chaos and prank anyone.
Fluttershy is VERY shy pegasus and element of Kindness who likes animals and calm life without any chaos.
I just can't see any other feelings between them except friendship.
2287122 2287154 What about this one?
2288670 Will read, this one is pretty random too.
OOh, I wonder what deviousness Discord is up to
you sir are a genius!keep this up!
2288670
Is there anything RD hasn't been shipped with?