Additional contributions by MixMassBasher.
Dear Honorary Big Sister,
Great job setting up the campfire! My sanity was really draining from… the dark cave… and the fire is sure to scare away Charlie Horse! We just have to not starve.
Your Honorary Little Sister,
Scootaloo
A long time ago….
Dear Rockhoof,
I sent this letter with urgent news. Get your weapons ready, for the Shadow Pony comes! Ragnarök has begun.
Your fellow pillar,
Star Swirl the Bearded
Dear Mistmane,
Urgent news. Your lone wandering will have to wait for a new enemy approaches from the horizon.
Your fellow pillar,
Star Swirl the Bearded
Dear Flash Magnus,
Duty calls my dear friend, raising your family will have to wait. But let it be known that if all goes well, your children and your children's’ children will take on your glorious name with pride.
Your fellow pillar,
Star Swirl the Bearded
Star Swirl the Bearded reread the three scrolls intently before passing it to his carrier ravens. Releasing the birds, he stared back grimly as the ravens flew out of his windows to send the scrolls to his fellow pillars. Dark clouds filled the sky as the ravens flew until they were but a speck in the distance. Star Swirl sighed. He was getting too old for this. Star Swirl hoped his fellow pillars would receive their messages. As one does not simply face the shadow pony alone.
THE FOAL FREE PRESS
PARTY CANNON DEBATE FLARES UP AGAIN
Ponyville citizen and Friendship Council member Pinkie Pie finds herself leading the charge against stricter party cannon laws after 17 students got confetti in their manes at a school outside Mareami last week.
"What we need is better background checks and more education on responsible party cannon ownership." The party planner stated. "Some of these ponies on the opposing sides are talking complete disarmament, stopping celebrations entirely."
Several protests were carried out across Equestria with many holding signs and chanting, 'Our manes are more important than your parties.'
The Celestial News Network held a town hall debate in Canterlot where the spokesmare for the National Cannon Association of Equestria was heckled and booed, with some ponies rushing the stage and threatening her. There are accusations that questions from attendees were scripted.
"Cannon-free zones aren't going to help at all," said party planner Cheese Sandwich. "If ponies are dead-set on celebrating, they're going to do it. If they don't do it with a party cannon, they'll do it with noisemakers or balloons."
As the debate continues to rage, cannon sales and NCA membership have seen sharp increases.
Princess Twilight Sparkle found herself agreeing with Pinkie Pie's defense.
"Are we really going to trust the opinion of school-age colts and fillies on party cannons? They were eating laundry detergent pods a month ago."