//------------------------------//
// A Flurry of Emotions 
// Story: Letters From A Disgruntled Friendship Student 
// by milesprower06 
//------------------------------//

Additional contributions by MixMassBasher





Dear Princess Cadance and Shining Armor,

I’m taking the weekend off. First, I’m planning on having a date with Starlight. Secondly, that purple furby toy you gave Flurry last Hearth's Warming Eve is giving me the creeps!

Your Royal Crystaller,
Sunburst





Dear Pinkie Pie,

Do you mind babysitting our foal?

-Princess Cadance and Shining Armor





Dear Princess Cadance and Shining Armor,

Sorry, but no. I already have my hooves full with the Cake twins and the next episode is starring me, my sister and Starlight, so I need to prep myself. Sorry.

Your busy baker,
Pinkie Pie





Dear Princess Celestia and Luna,

Do you mind babysitting our foal?

-Princess Cadance and Shining Armor





Dear Princess Cadance and Shining Armor,

We would love to, but no. We’re too busy getting ourselves ready for the episode that finally stars us princesses together. Thank Faust!

Your Aunts,
Daybreaker and Nightmare Moon





Prince Shining Armor looked back at the letters he just read for who knows how many times and sighed.

“We have no choice but to get Twilight to babysit Flurry, do we…”

“Unfortunately, no…” Princess Cadance replied.





Dear Cadance and Whining Armor,

So, you want me to babysit that alien facehugger you call a child while you visit one of those stupid art museums? Sure. Why not? Though, you seemed nervous about me being with my niece. What, are you afraid I’ll turn her into a miniature version of myself? How absurd. All I’m doing is just bringing Flurry to a hospital full of sick ponies. Nothing harmful.

Flurry seemed quite happy with me when I gave her the present meant for the sick foals at the hospital. See? I can be nice. Nothing to worry about.

And let’s get real here, what’s with all the fucking diapers? Do you two have a diaper fetish or something?

But I’ll cut to the chase here and now. Babysitting sucks. Never again will I do it!

Your little angel decorated me with peas with no stallion in sight to quench my food fetish.

Your little sweet pea then messed up the toy section and everypony blamed me!?!

Your stupid foal drew the most crude image of me on a chalk board. I am not that fat!

Your winged abomination got into a fight with the Cake twins. Wait, how are they still foals?

Everytime she burped lightning struck a pony!!!

And finally, your bastard child would have caused several foals an even longer stay in the hospital had I not put a stop to it.

By that point, if Flurry had suddenly inflated her head like a balloon, I’d be done with life. But I guess I should have expected this since your demon spawn nearly cursed the Crystal Empire to an eternal winter.

In conclusion, the next time I’d babysit your stupid foal would be when Tartarus freezes over.

Yours begrudgingly,
Princess Twilight Sparkle

P.S. Next time I buck a stallion, he'll be using a condom because there's no way I'll have one of those monstrosities pop out of my vagina.





Dear Twilight,

Oh, my dear sweet sister-in-law, I don't think that's something you'll have to worry about anytime soon. Never in all my days of love spell casting, have I met a stallion that masochistic.

To be honest, I thought that spending a day with our baby might convince you to get sex off the brain, but in hindsight, I was a fool.

Now I have to go spend the evening explaining to my husband why his friend is precisely what is wrong with modern art.

Sincerely,
Cadance