I stormed my way across Ponyville. The further away I got from Nightmare Moon, the better. It had been a mistake to even consider speaking with that monster. I was more convinced than ever that everypony had been fooled by the Nightmare. How else could they all believe that she had reformed, despite all she had done in the past? They were fools, the lot of them, and only I saw the truth. I now more dearly than ever wished to return home. Mother would know what to do in a situation like this, she always did. But alas, I was alone, and had nopony to turn to. Even Princess Celestia could not be depended upon where her sister was concerned. Her judgment was badly compromised, and she would not see the danger that was right in front of her.
Having few other options for where to go, I headed to Sweet Apple Acres to find my friends. Could I call them my friends? I had only known them for but a short time. I knew not the answer. Mayhaps I would see if a book knew the truth of it later. In the meantime, I wished to find somepony to talk with, even if I knew it would probably do little good. But what other choices did I have available?
As they often were, the Crusaders were located within their clubhouse amongst the orchards of Apple Bloom’s farm. Scootaloo was speaking with her friends as I opened the door. “I still say that the next time Rainbow Dash does her practice routine, we should just...” She stopped in her regular exercise of talking about Rainbow Dash when she saw me enter. “Oh hey, Middy!”
“Greetings,” I grumbled.
Dinky’s head tilted. “What's gotcha grumbly? Did you miss the muffin cart too?”
“Wait, there was a muffin cart?” Sweetie Belle asked. “I didn’t know that.”
“Well, it's more like it's Sugarcube Corner's cart,” Dinky said. “But I call it the Muffin Cart 'cause I always get a couple of muffins from it when I go by. Mommy used to, but she had to stop when they talked to her about minimum safe distances.” She held up a hoof to speak in a low whisper. “There were a few accidents.”
“Neigh, ‘tis not failing to procure muffins that has imbalanced my humors.” I growled in my throat. “Nightmare Moon wished to see me.”
Sweetie Belle blinked. “Wait, Nightmare Moon is back?!”
Dinky slapped her hooves to her cheeks. “Oh NO!”
Scootaloo ran for the window and looked up to see the sun. “I thought Luna stopped being evil! What happened?”
I scoffed. “She never stopped being evil. She has always been evil, and has merely tricked everypony into thinking she has changed her ways. As part of her scheme, she attempted to fool me with a fake apology, and thus make me lower my guard.”
Apple Bloom arched an eyebrow. “That don't sound right...”
“Yeah, she was really nice to me when I had a nightmare about...” Scootaloo cleared her throat. “Stuff.”
Sweetie Belle nodded in agreement. “And she helped me with Rarity.”
“‘Lula likes her too,” Dinky said. “‘cause she was there to help when her mom died. I dun think she's evil. She was really nice to us on Nightmare Night—especially to Pipsqueak. He said she's his favorite princess ever!”
I shook my head, hardly being able to believe my ears. The Nightmare was helping these ponies? Neigh, that did not sound right. She was a selfish creature; one who would destroy all of Equestria and commit the vile crime of kinslaying just to serve herself. Helping others was not something she would do.
“I do not see why she would be helping any of you. Unless...” I rubbed my chin. “There must be some bigger plot here. Mayhaps she wishes to convince the next generation that she is good so that she can turn them into her soldiers to try and overthrow her sister. She has fooled others and used them as tools against her sister in the past. ‘Tis what she did during the Lunar Rebellion. She has the gift of eternal life, so she can stand to wait until for whole generations to pass in order to further her goals.”
Sweetie Belle wrinkled her nose and her tone took on a note of incredulity. “That doesn't sound like her. She’s been really nice to everypony since my sister and the others used the Elements of Harmony on her.”
Apple Bloom nodded. “Everypony says she's good now.”
I stomped a hoof. “Then they have all been fooled!”
Scootaloo crossed her hooves over her chest. “Even Princess Celestia and Rainbow Dash? Rainbow Dash wouldn’t think someone was cool if they were evil. If she did she’d be kicking Luna’s butt.”
“Except they have all been fooled,” I declared. “Mother was right about Celestia. She is too kind-hearted, and blind where her sister is concerned.”
Sweetie Belle’s brow furrowed. “Hey, don't say mean things about the princess! That’s not very nice.”
“I need not be kind to black-hearted fiends!” I started pacing about the clubhouse. “I should have known you would not understand. The adults did not understand, even with the advantage of history telling them to be wary. So why would any of you be different?”
Sweetie Belle grimaced. “Why do you still think she's still evil?”
Scootaloo nodded. “Right, she’s Luna now, not Nightmare Moon.”
“Because she is,” I said. “She has not changed. Her apology ... she claimed the Luna and Nightmare Moon are not the same person, when they are. They are but two names for the same pony. ‘Tis as simple as that. She chose to betray her sister and Equestria and to commit her crimes. Merely dropping one of the titles she called herself by does not change anything.”
Dinky pressed her lips together and her brow furrowed as she thought hard. “I don’t know. I mean, Sparky said that she's not the same pony she was five years ago. Even if I don't totally believe that, 'cause she's still a brat.”
Sweetie Belle rubbed her chin. “Besides, all the bad stuff she did was a really long time ago. I mean, I guess she did a few bad things when she came back as Nightmare Moon, but nothing that bad. She scared everypony, but she was stopped pretty quickly. I think we can forgive her for anything bad she did if she really is a good pony now.”
“She is not a good pony!” I stomped my hoof again. “The passage of time does not neglect the evil of her actions. And to me she—” I stopped myself from saying more about what had happened in the past. Princess Twilight had been quite specific about not talking about the distant past, even if those events had not been long ago for me.
Scootaloo stepped closer to me. “What? What is it?”
I shook my head and my ears wilted. “Forget it, thou wouldst not understand.”
Scootaloo rolled her eyes. “Of course we don't understand. You haven't told us why.”
Apple Bloom placed a hoof on my shoulder. “Right, you need to tell us what’s wrong if we’re ever gonna know what’s botherin’ ya.”
Dinky gave me a gentle hug. “Sorry, but it felt like ya needed a hug.”
I grumbled as Dinky hugged me. “I am not allowed to explain.”
Dinky blinked owlishly. “Why?”
“Because Prin—Twilight said I was not to,” I said.
“Then how're we supposed to understand?” Scootaloo asked.
Apple Bloom wrapped a leg around my shoulders. “It's awful hard to help if we can't understand what the problem is. It's like Applejack always says: ya can't fix apple rot if you don't know the apple's rotted. Besides, Ah’m sure Twilight would understand if ya told us what’s wrong if it’s ta help ya. Friends should listen and help one another, after all.”
Sweetie Belle smiled and nodded. “Yeah, something's wrong, and we wanna help!”
I hesitated. Partially because I was unused to so many ponies being so close to me and touching me, but more so because I was unsure what to do. Twilight had been specific in not telling them the truth, but I dearly wished to so that they could understand me. Besides, they needed to understand the evil of Nightmare Moon, and the danger she presented.
So be it. If Princess Twilight was not aware enough to understand that Nightmare Moon was a danger, perhaps her judgment was not infallible.
“The truth is ... I am from nine hundred years in the past.”
Scootaloo’s eyes widened. “Whaaaaat?!”
“Whoooa.” Dinky cupped my cheeks and stared into my face. “I hope I look this good when I'm that old! You’re old enough to be a super-duper-mega-ultra grandma!”
“I am not nine hundred years old,” I grumbled. “I traveled in time by accident and ended up here. “Twilight did not wish for me to tell anyone due to potential complications, such as disrupting history, or destroying all of reality as we know it.”
Apple Bloom scratched her cheek. “I guess that makes sense.”
“Messing with history so that we erased ourselves by accident would be pretty bad,” Sweetie Belle agreed. “I read in a story once about a pony who ended up being their own grandpa. That’d just be weird.”
I tilted my head to the side. “I do not think ‘tis possible to become your own grandparent. The inbreeding alone would cause degenerative conditions.”
Sweetie Belle shrugged. “Well it was just a dumb story.”
“You all seem quite content with my story,” I said. “I admit, I half expected none of you would believe me.”
Scootaloo snorted as she smiled. “Nah, we believe you. This is Ponyville. We’ve seen all sorts of weird things, like when Discord escaped his prison and made the world absolutely crazy.”
“Or that time when there were about a hundred Pinkie Pie’s running around town,” Sweetie Belle added. “That was a pretty crazy day too.”
“Don’t forget the time when everypony ran through a bunch of poison joke.” Apple Bloom snickered. “I mean, mah sister was no more than six inches tall.”
Dinky nodded. “And my mommy set cereal on fire once. Everypony’s still confused how she even did that.”
“Ah, I see.” It seemed that my time traveling was just one strange event in a series of them. Admittedly, that did make things easier for me, so I should perhaps not complain too much.
“So, why does that make you hate Luna?” Sweetie Belle asked, bringing the conversation back to its original point.
My lips peeled back from my lips in a snarl. “Because she attempted to have me sacrificed to free herself from her prison during the Lunar Rebellion.” The declaration made everypony back away from me, and it took several seconds before they replied.
Apple Bloom took a step back from me. “She did what?!”
Scootaloo rubbed the back of her neck. “That's ... um ... wow.”
Dinky stared at me with wide eyes and her mouth agape. “Uuuum, I don't have the hugs for that.”
“As I said, she has a heart of evil. I have seen who she really is and know she cannot be trusted,” I said. “I will not apologize to such an evil pony when all she speaks of are lies.”
Sweetie Belle grimaced. “Um, maybe that's who she was, but like we’ve said, it's not who she is.
I shook my head. “I do not believe it.”
Apple Bloom rubbed her leg. “Um, well has she tried to kill ya lately?”
Scootaloo glowered at her friend. “Seriously, Apple Bloom?!”
Apple Bloom groaned and hurried her face in her hooves. “That seemed like a better question in mah head.”
I frowned as I answered her. “I do not think her not attempting to kill me recently makes up for previous attempts.”
“But that was a looong time ago,” Dinky said. “Like, even longer ago than when Grampa was born, and that's a long time!”
“That might be true for thee, but 'twas not that long ago to me,” I pointed out to them. “I can still remember when one of her cultists threatened to plunge a dagger into my heart and bleed me of my lifeblood to fuel the ritual to free their master.”
“But she's not evil now,” Sweetie insisted. “That’s what we’re trying to tell you. She's really nice. She helped me when I was fighting with Rarity.”
I sighed and slumped down against the wall. “Nopony will believe me.” I should have known that my friends would be no different than anypony else. It seemed all the world was against me on this. What would Mother do during a time such as this? Alas, none of her lessons had gone over what to do if I accidentally became a time traveler, and found myself facing my greatest enemy in a time and place where no one believed she was evil. If I ever saw her again I would ask.
Apple Bloom sat down next to me, sighing as well. “It's not that we don't believe ya. We all know she used to be bad. It's just ... well ... she ain't now.”
“That seems to be where we disagree,” I grumbled.
Scootaloo sat on the opposite side of me from her friend. “How can she prove she ain't evil?”
I frowned as I considered the question. “That is a difficult question, for I am certain she is evil.”
There was a knock on the door that interrupted the conversation.
“I’ll get it!” Dinky ran for the door and opened it. On the other side stood Princess Twilight. Dinky smiled widely and embraced her in a hug. “Hiya! It’s nice to see you again. Here, let me give you a hug! Well, I’m already giving you a hug, but you know what I mean.”
“It’s the feeling that counts.” Twilight looked up from the hug with a brittle smile. “Um, hello girls. Sorry to interrupt, but I was wondering if I could talk to Midnight?”
I narrowed my eyes and crossed my forelegs. “To what end? I am certain that you are simply trying to erroneously convince me that Nightmare Moon is no longer a monster. You have already proven beyond a doubt that her lies have fooled you as well.”
Princess Twilight sighed and ran her hoof down the side of her face before turning to the rest of the fillies. “Girls, if you would…”
“Sure thing, Twilight,” Apple Bloom said, nudging the other fillies out of the clubhouse. They silently filed out, with Scootaloo shooting me one final glance before following her friends.
When it was but the princess and I, I gave Princess Twilight my best scowl. “I believe that I have already made my position on Nightmare Moon quite clear. I will not fall for her lies as you have!”
“Midnight…” Princess Twilight reached a hoof out, but I took a step back before she could put it on my shoulder. “Okay, let me try this again from the start. So, how are you doing?”
“It has been a very trying day,” I said, keeping my back to her. “But such tends to be the way after meeting the monster that tried to kill you, and are forced to try and reconcile with said monster when all logic say ‘tis a terrible idea.”
Princess Twilight grimaced. “Right.” She hesitated before continuing. “It was very brave of you to meet with Luna.”
I was not immediately sure how to reply to that. “It was a very trying experience. To see the Nightmare before me once more, declaring herself blameless and innocent despite all the innocent blood upon her hooves. To ask my forgiveness while refusing to e'en acknowledge her own crimes. I do not grasp why you have forgiven such an unspeakable and unrepentant monster.”
“It's ... complicated,” Princess Twilight said. “She was mentally unhealthy and was suffering from a condition that was causing her to act in a destructive and dangerous manner. But we cured her of those problems with the Elements of Harmony.”
My ear twitched. “Evil is not a disease that can be cured.”
Princess Twilight let out a long breath. “Let me put it this way: do you know the correlation between crime and poverty?”
“Aye.” Mother had spent no small time with me talking about society's many ills. Among them were how a lack of coin could drive a pony to break many laws to provide for themselves. Hence why she had argued that prosperity could cure many of the problems of society. After all, there was little reason to steal when one had plenty of coin for lodging, food, and some entertainment. Not that ‘twas a universal cure, but it did help prevent many problems.
“So you'll agree that certain conditions can cause undesirable behaviors?”
I hesitated as I started to see where this conversation was leading. “That can be so, aye.”
Princess Twilight nodded. “And we can surmise that can be true of certain mental illnesses that ponies can either be born with or can develop due to outside stimulus?”
I frowned, not being able to find sufficient arguments against this point. “That would make sense.”
“And Luna suffered from such an illness.” She tapped the side of her head. “And that’s a big problem when an alicorn queen develops a mental illness.”
“So you claim she went mad?”
“Right, and the Elements of Harmony fixed that,” Princess Twilight said. “That’s why she's been able to pick up her duties at her sister's side again. She’s no longer suffering from the malady that was causing her to hurt ponies, or do things like try and cause an eternal night.”
That all sounded well and good, but I was not convinced. “E'en if that is so, it does not change all the many crimes she committed. And a mare who went mad once is more likely to do so again. She allowed the jealousy of her sister to drive her to evil in the past. What is stopping that from happening again, or something else causing her to become mad?”
Princess Twilight shook her head. “Luna is trying to atone for what she did in the past, and to learn from her mistakes. Shouldn't a pony be given a chance to do that if they're sincere?”
I frowned as I pondered this question. “That may be so, but I see no reason to believe in her sincerity, and she is a well-known deceiver. It seems far more likely this is some wicked artifice of hers, and she is only waiting until you lower your guard before she has you all brutally murdered, your eyeless heads staked upon the walls of Canterlot Palace as a warning to any who would dare to oppose her reign of unending darkness and despair.”
Princess Twilight sighed as she ran a hoof down her face. “Yes, there is a degree of risk. She might be deceiving us, or she might backslide into becoming evil again. But she might also become a real force for good again. The only way you can know for sure is to give her a chance to prove herself. And yes, that means you might get hurt doing so.”
I scowled, and my body stiffened as memories of the Lunar Rebellion returned to me. “I have suffered enough pain on the Nightmare's account. I have no intention of putting myself in a position where she could do me further harm, no matter how much she might have claimed to have reformed.”
Princess Twilight stared at me for several moments before she sat down next to me, and wrapped me with a wing. “If that's your choice, then alright. I'm not going to force you to accept her apology. It wouldn’t mean anything if I did. And this is, ultimately, your decision.”
I wrapped my forelegs over my chest. “Yes, it is.”
“I just want to give you and Luna the chance to move on from what happened between you in the past.”
My head tilted to the side. “Move on?”
She shook her head as though to clear it. “To be able to go on with your life without it bothering you. This is a very unique opportunity for both of you to reconcile and be able to move past this.”
“So long as the Nightmare is not currently attempting to murder or torment me, she does not bother me.” I blinked owlishly. “Or, at present, attempting to declare that she has never done either of those things, despite that being a blatantly obvious lie. Though only one of the many to leave her foul lips.”
“Midnight... how to put this?” Princess Twilight stared at the wall where the Crusaders had several new plans in the works to try and get their cutie marks. “She's trying to move on from what she did in the past. She knows what she did was bad, but just dwelling on it all the time and letting it drag her down isn't healthy for her.”
“And ... why is this my concern?” I asked. “The Nightmare feels sorry for some of her many crimes. Good. She should. Let the pain and remorse for her countless crimes eat away at whatever shriveled remnant of soul remains within her. Perhaps then she will know to never let herself fall so low again.” I snorted. “You speak as if she is entitled to my forgiveness.”
Princess Twilight shook her head. “No, that’s not what I’m saying. She's trying to earn it.”
“I have yet to see any evidence of that.”
Is there anything she can do to help prove to you that she's good now?” She frowned as she added, “That doesn't involve her dying?”
I pressed my lips together. “That would have been my first choice.”
Princess Twilight let out a huff. “Of course it would.”
“As Mother often says, words are naught but wind unless they backed by decisive action.”
“There's some truth in that.” She hugged me closer with her wing. “But you can't ask her to die. Though I'm sure she would be willing to do things less ... deadly.”
A pity, I would have liked for the Nightmare to die and no longer be a threat to anyone else, but I rarely got what I wished for. “Such as?”
“She wouldn't mind spending time with you.” Twilight grimaced. “Though it sounds like you might want some space from her.”
I nodded. “Yes, I do want space from the vicious monster who tormented my dreams and sought to have her minions ritually sacrifice me.”
Princess Twilight’s ears flattened. “She can do that if that's what you want. We talked about it after you left, and she understands if you might not want to see her again.”
“I should be quite content to ne'er again see the Nightmare,” I said. “For all she can bring to my world is pain, misery, and the death of those who have been good to me.”
Princess Twilight sighed. “Alright then, I’ll tell the others what you decided.”
I tilted my head to the other side as I considered this strange descendant of mine. I sensed that she wished for what was best for me, even if she often went about it in the wrong way. She might be a bit foolish, but neither did I wish for her to be harmed. “Be careful around her, for you are one of those who I would not wish to see die at the Nightmare's hooves.”
The corner of her mouth turned up in something that was almost a smile. “I will be, though I think you don't need to worry so much. I’ve spent time with her, and I’m convinced she's good now.”
My eyes turned to the ground. Why did nopony believe me when I said the Nightmare was evil, despite all the evidence of her misdeeds? Were ponies so quick to forget the crimes of others? “You are too trusting.”
She nudged my shoulder with a hoof. “Maybe you could learn how to trust a bit more.”
“Trusting others rarely ends well.”
Princess Twilight stood up. “I think you just haven't found the right people to trust.”
“Perhaps, but there are some I trust,” I said. “Mother. Lady Protector Shadow. Gale.”
Princess Twilight smiled. “And you're happy you can trust them, right?”
“Yes.”
“And I'm sure you would be happier if you could find more people you like,” Princess Twilight said. “I know I’ve been a lot happier after finding my friends.”
My head to the door my friends had exited. “I have ... enjoyed my time with the Crusaders.”
“That's good to hear. So...” Princess Twilight wrapped a wing around me to guide us to the door. “How about we all go and get some ice cream? My treat. I think you’ve been through enough to deserve it.”
My lips peeled back in a smile. “I would like that.”
For some reason, Twilight grimaced and turned her head from me as though she were staring into the sun. “Great, I'm sure we'll all have a great time.”