//------------------------------//
// Castle Sweet Castle 
// Story: Letters From A Disgruntled Friendship Student 
// by milesprower06 
//------------------------------//

Letters From A Disgruntled Friendship Student
by milesprower06

Castle Sweet Castle





"Alright girls, think. What was it that Twilight loved so much about living in the Golden Oak Library?"

"Um, nothing. She thought this place was a backwater town full of hicks that wasn't worth her time. She just stayed here to get away from Celestia."

"Well, 'ah can't really blame her there. Rarity, remember that one time we got stuck in the library during that thunderstorm, and she tried to get the two of us in bed with her?"

"Remember the time I purposefully waited for her to finish sorting, then "crash" into the shelves after my Sonic Rainboom attempt?"

"Remember the time we all conspired to get her sent back to Magic Kindergarten?"

"Remember the time right after her coronation where she summoned us all to the library to learn about the benefits of-"

"NO!" the other four screamed at Pinkie.

"Darling, I thought we agreed to never speak of that again."

"Alright alright. I'm sure that we can all agree that the more inviting we make this castle, the more time she'll spend in it, the less time she'll spend with us, and the less she'll be seen around town. That just means better things for everypony."





Dear Council of Friendship,

I must say, thank you for the spa treatment. It was very nice. After that, Fax Machine and I visited the remains of the library, and a button prompt appeared. 

'Press F to pay respects.' 

Weird.

So then he decides he wants a bed. I wonder why Quills and Sofas has beds. Maybe they're expanding.

When we finally get back to the castle, we notice that you all have done absolutely nothing.

Oh, wait, would you look at that. You turned the ass of a tree into a chandelier, and decorated it with gems filled with memories of the last five unpleasant Celestia damn years. It's just what this castle needed. So what happened to the basement of the library? So now there's just a hole in the ground with scientific equipment in it?

Thanks, but guess what? The halls still fucking echo. Pathetic.

Sincerely,
Princess Twilight Sparkle





Dear Rarity,

Look, it's been nice. You know, four plus years at not having my affections returned at all. So this is goodbye.

Bulk Biceps took me to the gay side of the spa, and... Um...

Fax Machine? More like Fabulous-ass Machine from now on.

Sincerely,
Spike





Dear Spike,

Perfectly fine darling. You can go.

Right after you give me royalty payments for that plush you sleep with.

-Rarity





Dear Angel,

Lock me out again, and I'll get your face really acquainted with a mud puddle. So long that you just might drown.

Sincerely,
Fluttershy





Dear Council of Friendship,

Why did you all have Spike delay Twilight until Sunset? I'm not coming back. My past is not today.  Your human versions are so much more willing to put out.

Sincerely,
Sunset Shimmer