When the Bearers race forth from Ponyville on an official mission, somepony has to take over on their day jobs. For Fluttershy, that's usually Snowflake.

But he's not available right now, so today, it's going to be a Sherman tank.

Don't worry. I'm sure nopony will ever notice the difference.

(Inspired by this story. Rated MC for MetaCrack.)

Now with author Patreon and Ko-Fi pages.

And here's a reading!

Mort, also known as the Pale Pony (of Death), has been tasked to take time off from his rigorous duties of reaping souls. Seeking guidance, he is directed towards the town of Ponyville, to learn about the magic of friendship from Twilight Sparkle and her friends. All he needs to do is keep his true nature a secret. That shouldn't be too difficult...right?

Special thanks to Specter-Von-Baren and Pyrite Foolsgold for their help in proofreading and editing this story, as I really needed it. Additional thanks to Pilate, Chuckle5, Unimpressive Vagaries and Admiral Biscuit as well! Couldn't have done it without all their help!

Credit for the title card goes to Siansaar, AKA Carnifex.

For another excellent take on Mort, check out Sip's version!

Many ponies claim to be the Seventh Element of Love/Honor/Fluffy Kittens/Whatever, all in the name of superficial love and glory. Many seek to fight monsters, to claim famous mares as their lovers, or to just stroke their egos. Enough for the Powers That Be to notice.

Chuck Norris is not happy.

Chuck Norris is going to slap roundhouse kick a filly.

Incredible thanks to Regidar and ThatOneWriter for helping me out by prereading it!

Special thanks to Manes for giving me the inspiration I needed to finish this!

This story is a sequel to Wanderings of a Non-Brony

After the six year journey around the planet in Wanderings of a Non-Brony, The human TD Harrison Powell finds himself in Equestria for good. He sees no choice but to settle down in Ponyville, ready to live the rest of his life as best as he can.

This is his life.

Edited by Marioland1 and Strike89

TD, the human first seen in No, I am NOT a Brony, GET ME OUTTA EQUESTRIA!!! has been in Equestria for a little over a year now and he's just beginning to fully adjust to his life there. However, when he wakes up one morning to discover that five of the Mane Six have switched cutie marks, he endures a significant change when he helps them out.

He is less than pleased.

Edited wonderfully by Strike89

Buy a print copy here!

Twilight Sparkle, Princess Celestia's most prized and faithful student, is being sent to Ponyville to learn about the magic of friendship.

And she's not happy about it.

Hear what Celestia has to say back! Check out the spinoff:
Responses To A Disgruntled Friendship Student by keaton-furman-prower

Still want more? Have a multiverse spinoff by MixMassBasher, my contributing writer for Seasons 5-9.
Letters From Across the Disgruntled Multiverse

Editing by Neko Majin C.

Disclaimer:
The following is a work of parody, and is protected as Fair Use under section 17 U.S. Code § 107 of US Copyright Law. My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic and all affiliated characters are property of Hasbro Inc.