Mort walked into the dressing room, Rarity's suit draped over his back. The room was larger than he thought it'd be, and just as frilly as the rest of the boutique. A light-purple wallpaper covered the walls, walls that at one end had a rack of dresses neatly hung up, and at the other end a number of pictures and paintings of mares in dresses. Sunlight streamed in from a circular window that was just high enough to be out of reach of more voyeuristic eyes.
At the far end of the room there was a long, ruby-colored dresser with white carvings, reminiscent of vines. A large, oval mirror stood in the center of the dresser, with a red boa and blue boa hanging across the top. In front of the mirror were dozens of bottles, brushes, eyeliners, lipsticks and other make-up accessories that Mort had never paid much attention to. Folded up and off to the side was a semi-transparent changing screen, that was decorated with images of various gems.
From where he was, Mort could see in the mirror a figure that was covered in an all-encompassing black cloak (that technically wasn't a cloak but a manifestation of his ethereal body) that concealed a skeletal body underneath. It was a shade that reaped the souls of dead ponies, was almost as old as ponykind itself, and had a body so alien in comparison to any other creature, one would find a closer relationship between apples and mollusks.
He had never felt more out-of-place than now.
He made his way over to the dresser, levitating the suit off his back and in front of him, unfolding it. It really was a nice suit, looking at it from top to bottom. It was just decorative enough to catch the eyes of others, but not so much it was an actual eyesore, striking a balance between evocative colors and jewelry without overdoing either. And given his eye for detail (since it came with being a shade), he was impressed by how neatly it had been sewn together, with no thread out of place, and every gem cut precisely.
As his eyes reached the bottom of the suit, he saw something barely sticking out from underneath the dresser, that was white and furry. Glancing up at the boa on the mirror, he figured that one must have slipped off at some point. He summoned his magic and grabbed the white boa, giving it a pull.
He lifted the boa into the air, and was ready to hang it up with the others when he realized it was not, in fact, a boa. Boas were typically not attached to the hindquarters of a fluffy, irate, and terrified feline.
Opalescence let out a loud yowl, causing Mort to let go of her in shock. This meant he now had a ten-pound bundle of fur and claws falling towards him. Mort instinctively dialed back on his corporeality, causing the cat to pass through him and land on the floor instead. Opalescence then dashed madly out the room, fur trailing in her wake.
“Um, I think I found Opal,” he said loudly, then shut the door with his magic before any other shenanigans could befall him.
Sighing, he levitated the suit in front of him, watching the reflection as he did so. He gave a thoughtful hum, and glanced around the room one last time to be sure that no eyes were on him. Satisfied, his cloak dissipated into a black haze, and he carefully put the suit on.
Mort looked at himself in the mirror again. The suit was now worn by a naked skeleton, hanging limply on his understandably thin body. It was almost pitiful, as if the suit itself were depressed. A solution came to him quickly enough, though. He willed some of his ether to flow across his skeletal form, an invisible current that filled out the suit until it seemed convinced it was being worn by a muscular stallion.
“Now that's more like it!” He turned to the left (“Nice.”), then to the right (“Nice!”), watching his reflection. He then turned his back to the mirror, and spun his head 180 degrees. “Very nice.”
He spun himself back around until he was facing forward again. He trotted around the room watching how he looked as he moved about, sometimes breaking into a march, or even a saunter. After a couple minutes of this, he came to a stop in front of the mirror, scratching his chin in contemplation. Staring at his reflection again, he felt that something was missing, he just couldn't put a hoof on what...
“Of course!” Thin, black ether streamed out of where his nostrils would be, twisting themselves until they created a passable imitation of a long and thin mustache. “Ahem. Good evening, miss Luna! Fine night for a spot of tea, don't you think? Wot wot!” He snickered quietly to himself. “Top of the mornin', chap! I'm afraid you shouldn't have tried to cram so many peanuts into your mouth all at once! Why, yes, I am the Pale Pony of Death! What gave it away?” He snorted, doing everything he could to remain in control, fits of laughter threatening to explode from his mouth. “What do you mean 'since when did you dress like that?' I've always been a skeleton with a snazzy outfit, a silly accent and a stylish mustaaahahahahaha!”
Mort rolled on the ground, holding his sides as the tide of mirth finally escaped in uproarious laughter. After calming down, he rolled back onto his hooves and stood back up, suppressing the occasional giggle.
“Okay,” he told himself, “I am definitely going to try that on Luna.” In fact, even as he considering the thought, he was already wondering what it'd be like to do something like this with the ponies he met. At least half of them were fearful or melancholy when they realized who he was, and it did bother him a little that some would go feeling like that. Maybe wearing something cheery or even absurd would loosen them up. And their expressions would be worth it, too.
Then again, when you keep a certain look for over a thousand years, it's hard not to get attached to it. And for all he knew, it would be the only meeting he would have. If they had to go knowing him, he'd like it if they went knowing, well, him.
His musings were interrupted by a knock at the door. “Who is it?” he asked.
“Oh, it's just me, darling!” Rarity said from the other side. “How does the suit fit?”
“Oh, it's great!” he replied enthusiastically, once again admiring himself in the mirror. “You're a real expert!”
“You flatter me, Mort,” she said. “But don't you think you would look even better with your necklace?”
“What are you talking about? It's right...” He reached up to where the necklace was, but his hoof only found air. Looking in the mirror, he realized just then that his neck was naked, with no sign of the enchanted jewelery.
He shouted in panic, looking frantically around the room. “Oh, no! No, no, no! Where is it?! What happened to it?!” He rushed around the room, magically lifting everything he came across, and pushing the heavier items. No matter where he looked, though, the necklace was no where in sight. Were it not for a lack of lungs, he may have been hyperventilating at this point.
Twilight's voice was then heard. “I-it's okay, Mort!” she said, sounding a little distressed herself. “We found it out here! Opal had it with her.”
Mort stopped what he was doing, letting the items he had been levitating fall back to where they were. “Opal? How could...wait, maybe when I...” He recalled what had happened the moment he walked in, with finding Opalescence and having to dematerialize before she fell on him. In his haste to do so, the necklace had completely slipped his mind. And given that Rarity's cat had fallen through where his collarbone would be...
“Oh, I can't believe I let that happen!” He fell on his boney haunches, moaned miserably. He hadn't even realized it was missing the entire time. He could have walked out of there without it, and even with the cloak on, there would have been no use hiding his face. “If I had lost it...”
“Oh, please don't be upset, dear,” Rarity told him through the door, sounding sympathetic. “The important thing is that we found it. No harm, no foul.”
He sighed quietly. That was true enough. The important thing was that they told him before he walked out. He had avoided, if barely, a major disaster.
“Er, Mort,” Rarity said, sounding reluctant, “do you want this now, or...?”
“Yes! Right away!” Mort answered rapidly. He obviously couldn't leave the room without it, after all. “The sooner, the better!”
“Well, if you insist!” Rarity said cheerfully.
The door knob turned, and Mort quickly realized the ramifications of what he said. Squawking in surprise, he quickly looked around, spotting the changing screen from earlier. He was just able to unfold it and move it in front of him before Rarity had walked in.
Mort stood motionlessly, just barely making out Rarity's outline through the screens. “Mort, where are you?”
“Uh, over here,” he said. “Do you have the necklace?”
“Right here, darling!” Mort saw something dangling in the air above Rarity, which jingled as it swayed. Not wanting to take any chances, he heightened his extrasensory abilities so that he could look through the screen that separated him and Rarity. Sure enough, what Rarity had was the necklace Luna gave him, untarnished and whole.
He sighed in relief. “Thank you so much, Rarity. I don't know what I would have done with it. Now, if you could just lay it on the floor and go back outside...”
“Oh, I could never put something this pretty on the ground and get it all dirty,” she said. Though she sounded scandalized, he could clearly see the mischievous grin that showed up a moment later. “It'd be better if I gave it to you, don't you think?”
Mort gulped. “Um, well, in that case, could you levitate it over the screen and let me catch it?”
“I...could do that,” she said slowly, looking slightly deflated. However, that was soon replaced by a cheeky grin. “Though I'd feel better if I could actually see you when I do. Oooh, I bet this would look wonderful with my outfit!”
Mort facehooved. He recalled just how insistent she had been about seeing him without his cloak. He had a strong suspicion at what sort of game Rarity was playing. “That's, uh, really not a good idea, Rarity.”
Rarity tilted her head to the side. Her look of confusion may or may not have been genuine. “And why not?”
“Oh, because I'm...um...” He trailed off, trying to think of something that would dissuade Rarity. What was Rarity like? She was prim, proper, liked to make dresses, had a strong fondness for jewels, and what little he had seen of her seemed to indicate she cared a lot about her appearance...
“I'm ugly!” he blurted out.
The outburst made Rarity take a bewildered step back. “E-excuse me?”
“I'm...I'm hideous,” he said, feigning revulsion. “I have...I'm...” He looked briefly at the mirror behind him, trying to think of a way to describe it. He never had the firmest grasp on what constituted as “pretty” and “ugly” among ponies. It all seemed so incidental to him most of the time. “It's...it's just too awful to describe, Rarity!” he finally said, giving a mock shiver. “I'd hate to disgust someone as pretty as you...”
He waited anxiously, watching her. While he wasn't very excited about being “ugly,” it was much better than being “absolutely terrifying.” And so long as he kept the cloak on, the “ugliness” wouldn't be a problem.
Rarity stared at him (or rather the screen; he certainly hoped she couldn't seem him very well), and sighed morosely. “Oh, Mort, you wound me...”
Mort tensed. She sounded sad. He was not going for sad. “I-I'm sorry, I didn't mean to disappoint you or anything...”
“I'll say!” she said. “How could you ever take me for being so shallow?”
“Well, it's just...” He trailed off again, repeating the words mentally. “Wait, what?”
“Yes, I tend to focus a lot on the appearance of a pony,” she explained, turning to the wall nearby. Her eyes scanned the various pictures and photos of lasciviously dressed mares. “My business does revolve around the creation of beautiful dresses, after all. The entire point of them is to draw the attention of others and make them look fabulous!
But I would never, ever think of judging you solely by your appearance. Physical perfection may draw the eyes, but it's what's inside here,” she tapped her chest for emphasis, “that matters more than anything.”
"Oh..." Mort scratched at the floor, suddenly feeling guilty. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have implied anything..."
"Oh, it's fine, dear!" she said, with a melodious giggle. Her expression then turned into one of concern. "I have to say, though, you are going to quite the extremes if you're really that worried about how you look."
"Well, it's...not exactly the sort of face anypony wants to see." Not including the severely depressed and morbid, anyway.
"Oh, Mort, please don't say things like that," she said sympathetically. "Nothing about your appearance will ever affect what we think of you."
Mort glanced behind him again, taking in the reflection. Red points of light stared back at him from within a bleached skull. “I really wish it was that simple, Rarity..."
“Of course it is!” she said resolutely. “Mort, the most important thing a pony can have is self-confidence, and the best place to start is not to worry so much about how you look. It pains me to see you hiding yourself like that, and in such weather as well! You must be suffering under there!”
“Well, it's not that bad,” he started to say, but Rarity cut him off.
“I'm going to prove that it doesn't matter what you look like, Mort,” she said, and to Mort's terror she started to walk towards him. “Now, I'm going to put this necklace on you, and I promise I'm not going to say one word about your supposed 'hideousness'. You'll see.”
Mort shifted his eyes between Rarity coming towards him, and the mirror behind him. If she got any closer she was going to see that mirror, and then him as well. Backing up, he summoned his magic and grabbed the screen, moving it with him while also enclosing it further around him.
Rarity stopped to look at him, frowning, then walking towards him again. “Oh, now don't be like that! Just give me a chance.”
“No thanks,” he said, shuffling to the right while taking the screen with him.
“Now Mort, I'm certain it's not nearly as bad as you're describing,” she said with firmness, following him. “Is it a scar?”
He shuffled further to the right. “No.”
“Early baldness?”
Shuffle. “No.”
“Crooked teeth?”
Every day shuffling. “No!” he said, moving in front of the window, and in the path of the sunbeam.
“Mort, please, I'm only trying to—”
The moment Rarity stood in front of him, her voice petered out. All she could do was stare, her jaw hanging open. Mort was confused for only a few seconds before he realized what was happening. With the sun at his back, he was now casting a shadow onto the screen. A shadow that was looking very skeletal at the moment.
Much like her cat from before, Rarity's pupils dilated, and she let out a blood-curdling scream that, in the right conditions, would have shattered wine glasses.
For the second time in the span of a few minutes, Mort dropped what he was holding. In this case, it was the changing screen. It fell over, landing on top of Rarity and silencing her.
Mort stared in shock, and was only broken out of it by several, quick knocks on the door. From the other side he could hear Twilight Sparkle, worry evident in her voice. “Rarity? What happened in there? Rarity?!”
Mort quickly scanned the floor, finding the necklace had dropped a couple feet away from the fallen screen, which was now bulging from Rarity's form. He quickly grabbed the necklace with his magic and put it on, but immediately remembered it wouldn't be nearly enough to hide his body. He fiddled with the buttons of the suit, only to find them getting stuck. His horn flared to get a better grasp using magic, but he was so panic-stricken he couldn't. Even as he tried to simply slide out of the suit, but it was getting caught on his ribs, in his vertebrae...
The door knob twisted. In a last, desperate attempt, he shut his eyes and visualized his cloak. He heard something tear, and then black ether erupted from his body, wrapping around himself.
By the time he was done, the door had burst open, and five ponies (plus one baby dragon) rushed into the room. There was a collective gasp, and five pairs of eyes were all on him.
"What in tarnations happened in here?" Applejack demanded.
Mort's answer was cut off by a weak groan, coming from under the screen. They all looked at it. Rainbow Dash and Applejack grabbed the sides, tossing the screen aside. Rarity rose from the ground, her eyes twirling in her head.
The white unicorn shook the stars from her head, and looked towards him. She gasped, her mouth opening and closing like a guppy as she pointed a quivering hoof at him.
She swallowed, struggling to form words. “W-what...what...!”
“R-Rarity...” He searched for words, but couldn't find any himself. This is how it would end, he realized. Found out because he couldn't get out of a simple suit. “I-I can explain...”
“What did you do to it?!” Rarity shrieked.
“I'm really a...” Mort stopped himself, and shot Rarity an incredulous look. “W-wait, what do you mean 'it'?”
“What do I mean? What do I mean?!” It was then Mort realized the hoof wasn't pointing at him. Not exactly him, anyway. When he followed it, he saw it was pointing at a gold tassel that was barely hanging onto his shoulder. Looking around, Mort saw himself surrounded by a ring of ripped, blue fabric and gold thread, the diamonds and ruby glittering in the sunlight. It was what remained of the suit, torn almost beyond recognition.
He remembered the tearing sound from earlier, and realized what had happened. His cloak had not wrapped around him like he intended, but had exploded outward with the force of a small explosion, leaving nothing behind but pretty rags.
For a moment, he felt an incredible sense of relief. If Rarity was choosing to freak out about a destroyed suit, then perhaps she wasn't even going to bring up the shadow she saw. Maybe she had forgotten it after the screen fell on her. Or she was just that more concerned with her outfit.
He soon felt the familiar tiding of dread, however, when Rarity slowly approached him, her large eyes focused on what was once a pristine outfit. “What could possibly possess you to do such a thing?!” she cried, scooping up one of the shoulder pads. She dangled it in front of him in an accusing manner. “Do you know how hard I worked on this? Do you?!”
Mort gulped, shrinking under her gaze. “I-I'm sorry, I—”
“Was it that awful?” she choked, her eyes brimming with tears. “Is that the real reason you hid yourself? Because you couldn't bear to be seen in it? Or because you wanted to do this to it the entire time?!”
“That's not it at all!” he shot back desperately. “I said I didn't want to be seen—”
“Well I'm sorry!” she wailed. “But did that really call for doing...this?” She collapsed to the ground, burying her head in her hooves as she choked back sobs. Mort stood, with no idea of what to do, or even what to say. He looked helplessly at the others, hoping they could step in, half-certain they would know what to do, but they almost seemed as lost as him. All except for Spike, who glared daggers at him as faint smoke billowed from his nostrils.
Rarity sniffed, wiping at her nose. “Everypony just gooo,” she moaned pitiably.
Mort stuttered, feeling lower than he had ever felt in a long time. “B-but...but—”
He was stopped by a strong, firm hoof on his shoulder. Applejack was staring at him with an unreadable expression, shaking her head. Feeling helpless, Mort was lead out by the others. He got one last look at the heartbroken fashionista before the door closed shut.
****
The door closed, and from inside came the audible sound of it locking. Twilight could hear Rarity sobbing quietly from the other side. She had half a mind to teleport in and try to comfort her, but at the same time realized that, as it was, it might make things worse. Though it frustrated her, Rarity needed a little time alone.
More frustrating was figuring out why it happened in the first place. Her first reaction was to demand from Mort a reason for destroying the suit, but that fizzled out when she saw how dejected and guilty the stallion looked. His whole body seemed to sag as he stood there, with his head dipped so low he looked like he was sniffing the floor.
She reeled her emotions in, thinking rationally. There had to be a reason for what he did, and it seemed to stem from his obsession with keeping himself concealed. Maybe Rarity had seen something. What, she didn't know. Not yet, anyway.
She took an uneasy breath. “Okay, Mort, can you tell us—”
“Why would you even do that, you jerk?!” Twilight cringed as Spike leaped from her back, almost forgetting he was there. The baby dragon landed in front of Mort, pointing an accusing finger at him. “She made that suit, all for you, and you just went and ripped it up!”
The cloaked pony shivered. “I-it was an accident,” he whimpered. “S-she surprised me, I panicked—”
“Oh come on!” Spike shouted, with angry disbelief. “How could you 'accidentally' destroy anything like that?! You're just a big, mean—”
“Spike!” Twilight marched over, looking disapprovingly at him. “Not another word, mister!”
The baby dragon stared at her in disbelief. “But, Twilight!”
“Not. Another. Word.” The baby dragon looked at her, seemingly ready to argue, but thankfully he relented and marched over to where the others stood, fuming. She couldn't bring herself to be too angry; she understood how Spike felt, and to be honest, she was a little angry about what happened as well. She wasn't going to get meaningful answers by screaming, though.
She looked back at Mort, who seemed to be even smaller than before. She took another breath. “Mort—”
“Hey guys!” Twilight facehooved as Pinkie Pie suddenly bounced over to them, an array of gear balanced on top of her. “Ooh, is that the outfit Rarity made? Funny, it looks a lot like what Mort used to wear! At least this way he can still keep the sun off!”
Twilight sighed. “Pinkie, this isn't—”
“But just in case, I got a bunch of stuff from Rarity's closet you might find useful! For instance, I got sun screen, sun hats, a sun umbrella and sunglasses! Go ahead, try them on!”
The pink pony slid the giant sunglasses onto Mort's nose. The cloaked pony didn't seem to notice, however, and the sunglasses simply slid back off. Pinkie Pie tried to put them on again, but was met with the same results.
Pinkie Pie seemed to finally notice the current atmosphere, and a look of concern crossed her face. “Hey, what's with all the frowny faces? Did something happen?”
“Mort blew up Rarity's suit,” Rainbow Dash said, looking pointedly at him.
Pinkie Pie gasped, all the beach gear falling off. She got directly in front of Mort, staring intently. “Blew it up? What happened, Morty?” Instead of responding, the cloaked pony averted his eyes, keeping them pointed at the floor.
“I've been trying to ask him that,” Twilight said, with a hint of annoyance.
“Well, it was just an accident, right?” Pinkie Pie asked, hopefully. “It's not like he meant to do it, right?”
“Well, Mort?” Twilight asked him. “Can you tell us what happened?”
This seemed to have gotten him as of his funk, as he suddenly stood tall. “It was an accident!” he exclaimed. “That suit was great! Wonderful! I'd never try to tear it up, I just...” He sighed, sounding weary. “When Rarity came in, she really wanted to see me, and I kept trying to hide myself, but then some...things happened, and I got so worked up trying to get my cloak back on, her suit...it just...” He trailed off, avoiding her eyes. “I-I mean it's not that bad, is it? It's not like...it wasn't made of rare materials or anything, was it?”
“It's not a matter of whether or not it can be replaced, Mort,” she said gently, “it's about the fact that she gave you a gift—a gift she worked very hard on—and it got completely destroyed.” He raised his head again, looking at her remorsefully. (Or at least, she thought so; it was unusually difficult to make out his expression.)
“Um, Mort?” Fluttershy approached him, with an expression both curious and concerned. “Is it really so bad if we...um, see you?”
“Yes!” he piped, nodding his head rapidly. “I'm really...I have...” The cloaked pony was silent for a moment, looking at his hooves thoughtfully. He took a long, deep breath, and slowly said, “I just can't let anypony look at me like that. I wish I could say more, but...I can't. It's just really, really complicated. I'm so sorry...”
There were traces of shame in his tone, but what had really stuck out was the sullen resignation of it all. As if he had little choice in the matter. She had initially assumed his secrecy had something to do with being shy or sensitive about his appearance, but he seemed to be treating it much more seriously than that. Now she was beginning to wonder if there really was more to it...
Rainbow Dash floated next to her, whispering in her ear. “What'd I tell ya? This is super, secret agent stuff!”
Rainbow Dash's words brought her back to her senses, and she merely rolled her eyes at the idea. Maybe Mort was being secretive for more reasons than she thought, but they were probably understandable. And not nearly as ridiculous as being a secret agent.
“This isn't right.” Having regained his composure, Mort began to walk towards the room. “Look, maybe if I go in and say I'm sorry, she—”
“Oh no!” Spike quickly slid in front of the door, holding his arms out to block the door that dwarfed him. “You are not getting anywhere near her right now!”
The cloaked pony sputtered. “B-but—”
“It's nothin' personal, Mort,” Applejack said, walking up next to him. “I believe ya. Ah'm sure yer mighty sorry 'bout what happened, but Rarity...well, she does have a thing for bein' overly dramatic, bless 'er heart.”
“Oh, you have no idea!” Pinkie Pie chimed in, bounding over to them. “One time she was at Sugarcube Corner, and I gave her a new brownie sample, and she liked it so much she asked for another one, then another, then I kinda teased her about eating too many brownies, and she said, 'Oh no, I'm turning into a blimp!' and ran all the way home and we had to convince her that she wasn't fat and it wouldn't matter if she was and...” Pinkie Pie took a deep breath, her cheeks bulging out, before deflating to normal. “So yeah, she's kinda sensitive about that sort of stuff!”
“Uh, yeah. Thanks Pinkie.” Rainbow Dash glided over and landed in front of Mort, causing Spike to continually attempt to peek around her, not wanting to lose sight of the cloaked pony. “Anyway, what they're trying to say is that when stuff like this happens, you generally gotta let her cool off first. You saw it. She had the whole 'woe is me' thing going.”
Mort didn't say anything at first. He looked between the three ponies surrounding him before turning back to look at Twilight. “Um, do you want to wait for her to...well, 'cool off'?”
She bit her lip, conflicted. It could be hours before Rarity was ready to talk again, and that would eat into the schedule they had spent so much time on. But there was no way she could just leave her alone. 'Overly dramatic' or not, the dress designer was clearly upset, and for a good reason. She needed somepony to be with her...
Her internal struggles may not have been as internal as she liked, as Applejack then said, “No need to get yer bridle in a twist, Twi'. Y'all can get a move on, if ya like. Ah can stick around and talk her out of there.”
“Are you sure?” she asked. “I mean, I'm sure if we need to—”
“Nope, won't hear nothin' of it.” Applejack came over and threw a foreleg over her shoulder. “Ah don't think Rarity would want somethin' like this to get in the way of everythin' today, Twi'. Trust me, she'll come 'round, an' be all understandin' like.”
Twilight still hesitated for a moment, torn about what to do, but the confidence in Applejack's voice and smile eventually won her over. “Well, if you're that sure, Applejack...”
“Ooh, ooh!” Spike suddenly climbed up Rainbow Dash and began to bounce up and down on her head, waving his hand in the air, much to the pegasus' chagrin. “I can stay, too! Rarity definitely needs all the support she can get.” The dragon yelped as Rainbow Dash flung her head up, sending the dragon through the air a short distance to land on Twilight’s back.
“Sorry, Spike,” she said, “but I think it'd be better if you came with us. I'll feel better showing Mort around if my number one assistant is with me.” In truth, she was mostly concerned that if Spike stuck around, he'd only make things worse between Mort and Rarity; he was still acting unusually hostile around Mort (well, not as unusual now), and she didn't want him feeding Rarity the idea that Mort had destroyed the suit intentionally.
Judging by Spike's expression, even the extra smothering of praise in her last statement did little to convince him. None the less, the baby dragon twisted himself around, keeping his back towards her. She had the idea of scolding him for the attitude, but decided to let it go. She really couldn't blame him for being upset this time.
Applejack left her side and went over to Mort, giving him a playful punch in the shoulder. “Don' you worry too much, Mort. You can apologize to her all ya like once she comes out. It'll work out, you'll see.”
Mort nodded gratefully. Twilight took the lead, guiding everyone out of the boutique, leaving Applejack to sit by the dressing room door. She felt another flicker of doubt about leaving Applejack by herself, but reminded herself that there was nopony more dependable than Applejack.
As they got outside, back into the hot, summer sun, Mort scratched at the ground, appearing even meeker than before.
“So,” he asked, drawing the word out, “where to next...?”
*****
Angel loved Fluttershy. He sometimes gave her a hard time, teased her, and, admittedly, acted like a brat, but he really did love her. The pegasus had raised him since he was little, feeding him, housing him, making sure the larger rabbits didn't pick on him, tending to any scrape he would get. Fluttershy was very, very close to being a mother for him.
And like all mothers, they had an annoying tendency to rope them into things. Especially if they involved “cute” outfits.
He tugged at the collar of the conductor suit that Fluttershy had him wear today, the clothing making him feel even hotter then he normally would. A tiny music stand stood in front of him, with equally tiny sheet music, with a tiny conductor baton laying across it. He couldn't read it, and he didn't know how to conduct; Fluttershy just told him to “wave the stick around” because, of course, it would be cute.
Not far from him, sitting in a tree, were a flock of restless birds. Blue Jays, robins and finches were perched on the branches, grooming themselves, while at the base of the tree were ferrets with drums, a pair of rattlesnakes, a pair of garden snakes with rattles so they wouldn't feel left out, and a porcupine with a xylophone.
The park was just beginning to bustle with ponies, friends and family meeting with each other under shady trees or on a park bench. A couple times there would be foals, excitedly running around the impromptu concert, before their parents would come and drag them away. At the bottom of a small hill, not far from him, was a pond where some ponies were spending time together in little paddle boats. Wanting to throw himself in the pond was another urge he had to resist.
He looked at the stop watch he had set down, noting the time. He still had at least another half-hour before Fluttershy was due to arrive, along with some pony he’d never heard of. Of course it would happen on one of the hottest days of the year. He wasn't sure if the extra carrots Fluttershy promised him were worth this.
Just as he was contemplating the consequences of simply heading home, he heard hoofsteps coming his way. Readying himself to drive away yet another solicitor, he was surprised to find it was actually Fluttershy, looking anxious.
“Oh, Angel! I'm sorry I'm so early, but something came up at Rarity's. We need to move the concert schedule up. Um, if you don't mind, that is...”
Angel wanted to breath a sigh of relief more than anything, but held back, and instead furrowed his brows, as if in deep thought. Fluttershy watched him nervously, as if expecting him to say that he needed more time. A lot more time, even.
That couldn't be any further from the truth, of course. He wanted to get out of the sun and this stupid suit as quickly as possible, but he did get a certain amount of satisfaction from making Fluttershy squirm, if only as a little payback for being dragged out here for some pony he probably wouldn't even like.
Finally, he gave a slow and deliberate nod, and the pegasus pony clopped her hooves together in joy. “Oh, thank you, Angel!” She reached down and squeezed him in a hug. He struggled in her hooves, his face flushing with embarrassment, hearing some amused noises from the birds and ferrets. He wished she didn't do this in front of the other animals. In private was another thing entirely, but not in public with so many watching.
She finally released him, letting him down gently on the ground. “Okay, Angel, you and the others get ready, and I'll bring everypony over, okay?” With that she took off into the air, flying towards the other side of the park.
Not long after, she came back, and with her were three of her friends: the loud-mouth pegasus, the reality-defying earth pony, and the eggheaded unicorn—as well her pompous assistant—and...
Angel blinked, rubbing at his eyes. The final member of her group was a unicorn, or at least he thought it was, wearing a black cloak that was darker than any raven, and with a horn that seemed bent. His face could barely be seen, save for eyes that seemed unusually red.
He shivered, feeling goose bumps across his body. Something seemed off about that pony. Very off. But before he could think about it further, his thoughts were interrupted by a high-pitched squeal from the pink pony.
“Oh my gosh, Fluttershy! He's so cute in that itty, bitty, suit of his! He's even got a teeny bow tie!” The pink pony giggled delightfully, and Angel felt his humiliation increase ten-fold.
“I'm glad you liked it! I sewed it myself.” Fluttershy walked over to the cloaked pony, presenting him. “Angel Bunny, this is Mort, that friend I was telling you about last night. We're hoping to give him a fun time today.”
“Wow, Fluttershy, you didn't tell me it was a concert,” the purple unicorn said, evidently awed. “How did you set this up in such a short amount of time?”
“Oh, it wasn't that hard,” Fluttershy said modestly. “To be honest, I was wanting to do something like this for the next Summer Sun Celebration. It's still a work in progress, because I want to get as many animals as I can to play something.”
“I...guess, that's kinda cool,” the cyan pegasus said, obviously unconvinced. Angel shot a dirty look at her, but the rainbow-maned pony didn't seem to notice.
The cloaked pony, meanwhile, just shrugged. “Well,” he started, in a small voice that conflicted heavily with the ill feelings Angel had, “if it's good enough for the Summer Sun Celebration, let's hear it!”
Fluttershy smiled appreciatively, and gave a nod towards Angel. Angel nodded back, and straightened his pose. He licked his palm and slicked his ears back. He then picked up the conductor baton, tapping the music stand. He didn't like it, but that didn't mean he couldn't look good doing it, either.
Each music piece was relatively short, some lasting as few as thirty seconds, some going on for almost two minutes. He wasn't sure where, exactly, Fluttershy had got the tunes, whether she had made them herself or had read them from somewhere else. Still, he had to admit, some were quite catchy.
He looked behind him to see their reactions. Fluttershy, of course, was smiling with pride, clopping her hooves together. The pink pony was dancing in place, singing lyrics to herself. The cyan pegasus looked bored, though he could still spot her hoof tapping to the rhythm occasionally. The purple unicorn and her dragon assistant were nodding along, pleasant smiles on their faces.
The most surprising reaction, though, was from the cloaked pony, who was not only tapping his hooves to the beat, but also swaying his body side-to-side, sometimes spinning in a little circle. It was, for lack of a better term, dorkish. The mere sight of it almost made him forget that he was getting the creeps from him earlier.
Not long after, the miniature concert ended with a musical climax from every animal performer there. Hot, sweaty, and exhausted, Angel turned on the spot, and did a little bow. All the ponies and the baby dragon gave a round of applause, with some whistling from the pink pony. He was simply glad it was over.
“That was amazing!” Angel looked up to see the cloaked pony coming forward, his pale face becoming visible. “I mean, I've heard birds sing before and everything but that was...and the snakes, and the drums and...wow!”
Fluttershy held her hooves up to her face, grinning. “Y-you liked it?”
“I loved it!” he said. “I can't even imagine what this would be like once you get even more animals on board!”
“O-oh, well, um, thank you very much, Mort.” Fluttershy's smile grew wider, her face turning beat red. “If you like, I could take you over to my cottage to see all the others. They love visitors!”
“I'll...have to think about it,” Mort said, sounding slightly apprehensive. “Until then, any chance for an...'encore', was it? Yeah, an encore?”
Angel went stiff. He did not, could not, would not, stand out here anymore. He had finished his side of the bargain, and had sweated perhaps more today than he had ever all summer. He crossed his arms, glaring at the cloaked pony.
“Oh, Angel, don't be like that.” Fluttershy gently lifted him up, giving him an imploring look. “Mort is a very special guest, couldn't you do it one more time? For him?”
He humphed, looking away from her. He really doubted she'd use the Stare, but he didn't want to take any chances.
“Oh dear,” she said, disheartened. “Please, Angel Bunny? Can you really say no to him?” She bent down, lifting him by his armpits against his verbal protests.
“Um, F-Fluttershy, I really don't think...uh...”
Angel tried to glare at the cloaked pony, but what he saw knocked the wind out of him. He was looking directly into the hood of the cloaked pony, his face unnaturally thin, and his eyes practically glowing. He blinked once, and the pony's face seemed to get even thinner, what fur was there was disappearing and revealing something smooth underneath. The eyes seemed to grow brighter, and he noticed the lack of pupils, or irises, or even the actual eyeball.
He blinked again, and this time his blood went ice cold as he was staring not at a pony face, but a pony skull, perpetually grinning at him with eyes that were not really eyes, but burning points of light. He had sudden flashes of memory, of animals dying from age, disease, or predators from the Everfree Forest.
He blinked again. And again. And again. And no matter how many times he did it the skull didn't go away, and if anything looked even more real.
The skull coughed nervously. “Uh, e-everything okay, little guy?”
Angel screamed, and threw the baton straight at the monster's face, causing it to step back in surprise. A moment later, Angel was dropped unceremoniously on the ground, his rear breaking his fall. Rubbing his bruised rump, he watched in horror as Fluttershy actually went to the monster, barraging it with apologies and asking if it was all right.
For a moment he thought he made a mistake, and saw something that wasn't there. When he looked at the other animals, though, he could see it in their terrified eyes and the way they quivered on the spot. They saw the same thing too.
When he turned back around to check on Fluttershy, she was already marching towards him, her eyes narrowed in disapproval. “Angel Bunny, what's gotten into you?! That's no way to treat a guest!”
Angel opened his mouth and prepared his paws, wondering how he could pantomime the fact that she was next to a monster. But before he could dwell on it further, his eyes were drawn to the monster that had recollected itself, and was approaching Fluttershy from behind, his curved and very sharp horn gleaming in the sunlight.
His heart stopped. His terror-wracked brain imagined dozens of scenarios involving that horn and Fluttershy. He briefly imagined life without her tucking him into bed, or nuzzling him when he did a good job, or nursing him when he was sick, or comforting him after he screwed up. A life without her wasn't a life he wanted.
He whistled for the other animals, breaking them out of their trances, and pointed at the monster, barking an order.
All at once, they attacked.
****
Twilight gasped as Angel threw the baton straight at Mort's face, sending the cloaked pony tumbling back in surprise. She moved in quickly, using her body to keep him from tumbling over as he seemed prone to, feeling a chill pass through her as she did so. How could he manage to feel so cool in this weather?
“Oh my gosh!” Fluttershy was over in an instant, a look of mortification on her face. “Oh, Mort, I'm sorry! I'm so, so sorry! That's never happened before! You're not hurt, are you?”
“I-I'm fine,” he said, unsteadily getting back to his hooves, and the chill Twilight felt left just as quickly. “It's not a big deal, I-I mean, I probably just spooked him. It's not his fault.”
“No!” Fluttershy's mouth curved into a scowl. “There's no excuse for doing something like that!” The yellow pegasus spun around, marching towards the white rabbit. “Angel Bunny, what's gotten into you? That's no way to treat a guest!”
Mort came up behind her, stuttering. “L-look, it's not a big deal. I'm sure we can just—”
Before he could say anything else, there came a small (and almost adorable) battle cry from Angel, who seemed to regard Mort with nothing short of utmost contempt. A moment later, the birds that had been perched in the tree took off, flying into the sky before dive bombing towards Mort. Mort yelped, and ducked just in time to miss getting pecked.
In his distraction, though, he didn't see the rattlesnakes, ferrets and porcupine charging at him. Twilight watched in horror as the ferrets leaped onto Mort's hood, scratching and biting, causing him to rear back in panic. In that panic, the two snakes slid up and wrapped themselves around his legs, biting into the thick cloak. The porcupine, meanwhile, was ramming him from all sides, with each strike leaving more quills in his cloak.
Mort acted as well as he could have: he ran around like a mad pony, screaming in fright as the animals continued their assault, the birds diving back down to peck at whatever wasn't being attack already.
“Oh, no! No! Stop it!” The horrified Fluttershy flew towards Mort, doing her best to drag some of the animals off, but it was nearly impossible to do so with Mort running as he was. And whenever she did somehow manage to pry one of them off, they would merely squirm out of her grasp and latch back onto Mort. “Stop it! Stop it, all of you!” she cried, sounding on the brink of tears.
“Sleeper hold, Mort!” Rainbow Dash hollered, cupping her mouth. “Use your sleeper hold!”
“I don't have a 'sleeper hold'!” he shouted back.
“Pfft, what kind of secret agent are you?”
“I'm not a secret agent!” He stopped to deliver that declaration, and in that window the snakes slithered up his cloak and inside his hood. His eyes turned to pinpricks. “They're INSIDE me! Sweet, merciful Thanasia, get them out!”
Twilight gawked at the scene, unable to organize her scattered, panicked thoughts into a coherent idea. She had never seen Fluttershy's animals act so violently, and was still trying to formulate a way to get them off without ending up like Fluttershy's attempts.
Even Pinkie Pie's bubbly attitude had disappeared, to be replaced with grim anxiety. “Uh, Fluttershy drains the venom from all her snakes, right?”
“I-I think so,” Twilight said, with more uncertainty than she wanted.
“Oh, well, that's good. So...what happened to the other snakes?”
Twilight snapped her head around. “What other snakes?”
As soon as she said that, she saw them, the pair of garden snakes that had been holding the rattles from before. They had done away with the instruments, and were waiting on top of the hill, where Mort was stumbling towards. The garden snakes nodded at each other, tied their tails together, and then stretched themselves out. Coming up behind Mort, unseen since it all started, was Angel, bearing the baton like a joust.
It was very clear what was going to happen. “Mort!” she shouted. “Stop! Don't go that way, it's—”
It was too late. Angel gave a victorious squeak and struck Mort with the baton, snapping it in two and sending the cloaked pony forward, just enough to be tripped by the garden snakes. The animals abandoned him as he tumbled down the hill, before finally crashing into the pond, sending water everywhere.
Twilight’s jaw nearly unhinged, and she galloped towards the pond, passing through the cheering animals. By the time she got to the pond's edge, she could see a shadow in the water making its way towards shore. She rushed over to its destination, arriving just as Mort broke through the surface, water pouring down his cloak. Twilight stuck her hooves out, pulling him out of the pond.
He began to sputter broken words. “Terrible, rotten...cute, but still...wouldn't get off me...poking around my insides...oh goodness, I feel so unclean...”
“You're not hurt, are you?” she asked, remembering the bites and quills. “Maybe we should get you to the nurse!”
“I'm not hurt,” he grumbled. “Just...aggravated. And wet.” He shook his body like a dog, and she had to step back to avoid getting drenched. By the time he finished, the librarian was surprised to see that his cloak was completely dry again, and somehow missing the holes and tears that should have come from the animals.
Before she could wonder about it further, there came a distressed beating of wings. “Mort!” Fluttershy called, hovering just a short distance from them, concern etched all over her face. “Oh my goodness, I'm sorry, they never, ever acted like that before! Are you okay?”
“Okay? Okay?!” He spun his head around, and Twilight stepped back as a furious tone took hold of Mort's voice, his eyes darkening. “I was pecked by birds, bit by ferrets, poked by porcupines, constricted by snakes and sent into a pond! I am just peachy!”
Fluttershy recoiled as if struck. Her lip quivered and tears began to stream down her cheeks. “I-I'm sorry...,” she choked.
Mort's eyes widened. “W-wait,” he said, his tone now regretful, “I-I didn't mean to...”
Fluttershy flew away before he could finish, sobbing quietly to herself. She made a shaky landing back where her animals were, attempting to gather them together. Mort watched her a moment longer, then he began to walk in the opposite direction, his head bowed low.
“Wait, Mort, it's...” She searched for the words, but couldn't find them. Everything she could say sounded so feeble at the moment. She could only stand there as he sulked away.
She heard a fluttering of wings, and looked up, hoping it was Fluttershy. Instead, she saw Rainbow Dash flying towards them, skidding to a halt in front of her. The pegasus grinned nervously.
“Sooo,” the young flier began, hesitantly, “what happened?”
“Mort bit Fluttershy's head off,” Spike deadpanned.
“Spike,” Twilight Sparked sighed, unable to even muster a scolding tone.
“Aw geeze...” Rainbow Dash facehooved, sighing to herself. “Well, after what happened, I guess he'd be a little sore...”
Twilight looked at her pleadingly. “Rainbow Dash, could you...?”
“Way ahead of ya, Twilight. I'll see you guys later.” She gave a short salute, then took off in a rainbow blur, chasing after Fluttershy.
Nothing was said for a moment. Twilight lay down, staring out across the pond, feeling tired and frustrated. The day had started promisingly, but had quickly spiraled into chaos. Reality, it seemed, had a fondness for beating her with Muphy's Law.
How was Luna going to react to this? She'd been given a personal assignment from the princess herself, to help a friendless pony make friends, and so far it was looking unforgettable in the worst, possible terms.
“What am I going to do, Spike?” she moaned miserably, resting her head on her forelegs. “It's like one disaster after another today!”
Spike scratched his head, deep in thought. “Maybe we should just tell Luna it's not working out?”
“What? No! That's an awful idea!” she admonished. “How could you even suggest that?”
“Oh, come on!” he groaned. “At the rate we're going, he's going to end up in the emergency room just by watching Rainbow Dash.”
“That's no reason to abandon him!” she snapped.
“He's a walking disaster!” he snapped back, nostrils flaring. “Look what he did at Rarity's! Or to Fluttershy!”
Some choice words floated to her mind, but she took a deep breath to calm herself. Snapping at Spike wasn't going to work, and if anything it might make things worse. After she had calmed herself, she spoke in a soft, but firm, voice.
“Everypony makes mistakes, Spike,” she said. “Some bigger than others. I know he accidentally hurt Rarity's feelings, but it was just that: an accident. And of course he'd be a little upset after what happened just now. We can't go turning our backs on somepony because they did things they didn't mean. If we did...well, I don't think anypony would have a friend left.”
Spike crossed his arms. “What are you talking about?”
She sighed, frustrated. “Spike, do I need to tell you the times we messed up?”
Spike seemed to have a moment of clarity, his eyes widening at the implications. “Uh, you mean like that time with Mr. Smartypants?”
“Yes,” she answered, unable to stop a tiny pang of guilt. “Or that time you pillaged the whole town?”
“Oh. Yeah...” Spike turned around, wrangling his fingers. “That was kinda bad, huh?”
“Yes, but we forgave you, because we know you didn't mean it,” she said gently. “And everypony forgave me, because they understood I was really stressed, and knew how sorry I was. How would you feel if everypony stopped being friends with us because of what we did?”
Spike was silent for a moment, as the thought sunk in. “Pretty awful,” he said quietly.
“Exactly,” she said. “I won't say Mort isn't confusing in his ways, but I really don't believe he means for any of this to happen. Maybe this is the entire reason why Luna sent him to us in the first place!” Twilight felt a steely resolve take root in herself. “Well, one things for sure, I'm not giving up! Whatever it takes, I am going to show Mort the best day of his life, even if it kills me!”
Something splashed in the pond, and Twilight shot to her hooves with a startled yelp, knocking Spike off her back. Shaking the water from her mane, she saw what had caused the splash. “Pinkie Pie?!”
The earth pony's head was sticking out of the water, staring at her with a grim expression. She wore flippers on her hooves and a snorkel on her face. She saluted Twilight, her voice a serious monotone.
“Sergeant Sparkle! Operation Mort's Best Day Ever has completed Stage 3: Cuddly Critters, but with heavy losses! Our forces are down to forty-two percent, and the target has run off to mope somewhere! Should we fall back?”
She shot Pinkie Pie a confident grin, not bothering to question her choice of delivery. “Negative, Private Pinkie Pie! I will assess the target, then we'll regroup and continue the operation!”
“Sergeant, may I suggest we rendezvous at Sugar Cube Corner?”
Twilight could barely suppress her giggles as Pinkie Pie continued her act. “That sounds perfect, Private! I'll see you in half-an-hour.”
The serious expression on Pinkie Pie's face lasted a moment longer, before dissolving into a huge smile. “Okie dokey, pokey pony!” She pinched her nose with a hoof, and dived back down into the water.
Spike scratched his head. “'Pokey pony?'”
“Come on, Spike,” she said, lifting him up onto her back. “We got a pony to cheer up.”
It didn't take the two of them long to find him. He hadn't gone very far, settling down on a grassy slope in the shade of a tree. The slope looked over the hub of the park, which consisted of a dirt path circling a fountain, surrounded by benches and several paths leading elsewhere through the park and into town. More ponies were beginning to show up, with the plan of enjoying the bright, clear day.
Mort didn't seem to register her until she was practically on top of him. He looked up at her with pink eyes, looking pitiful.
She put on her most encouraging smile. “How are you doing, Mort?”
He shrugged, murmuring something under his breath, before turning his gaze back to the fountain.
Not to be discouraged, she asked, “Are you sure you're not hurt?”
“I'm okay,” he said. Hearing nothing else, Twilight settled down next to him, keeping some space between them. She looked out at the park along with him, watching as Ponyville's citizens went about their activities. Friends were gossiping with each other, a couple were throwing bits into the fountain for good luck, and an ice cream vendor was beginning to set up his cart.
Mort suddenly muttered something.
“What was that?” Twilight asked.
“I'm sorry,” he whispered. “I didn't mean to snap at her, I...” He shook his head wearily. “It wasn't her fault.”
“It's okay,” she said, reassuringly. “Rainbow Dash is with her, and Fluttershy's a tougher pony than she looks. Trust me, she'll be fine.”
“I guess,” he replied, sounding unconvinced. There was another awkward pause, before he said, “I'm making a mess of things, aren't I?”
“No, no! Of course not! I mean...okay, there have been a couple bumps in the road,” she sheepishly admitted, “but that's pretty normal, all things considered. I mean, when I first came here, I ended up getting covered in mud, drenched in water, and drinking hot sauce of all things.” She giggled at the memory, trying to lighten the mood.
“You didn't bring anyone to tears though, did you?” he muttered miserably.
Twilight frowned. “Well...no...”
Mort sighed. “Twilight, I...really appreciate what you're trying to do,” he said, morosely. “But with the way things are going...maybe I should just go before anything else happens.”
She felt her spirits falter, and her chest tighten. “Oh, no, Mort...”
“I mean, it's not just about destroying that suit or getting attacked or anything, I really...well...” He shuffled his hooves, giving an air of embarrassment. “I really wanted to make a good impression on all of you, you know? After everything you've done for Lu...for everypony, I just...” He trailed off, resting his head on his forelegs, and seemingly trying his best to sink into the earth. “They probably don't like me now. Maybe I'm not cut out for this sort of thing after all...”
Twilight felt a knot in her stomach. She recalled Luna's letter, and how it said Mort had few friends to call his own. And now that he was given perhaps his best chance to make them...she found herself not so much as dreading what Luna would think, but dreading what it would do to Mort. The only thing worse than having few friends, is believing you would never be able to have them. And she couldn't let him leave thinking that. No pony deserved that.
“Mort,” she started, gently, “My friends won't hate you, and there's absolutely no reason to think you can't have any friends either. I know you've made a few mistakes, but that doesn't make you a bad pony!”
“'Mistakes' is putting it lightly,” he muttered drearily.
“Listen, it's hardly the worst thing that's ever happened to them,” she said, trying to steer the conversation into a more positive direction. “They'll pull through no problem, you'll see!”
“I'm sure they will,” he concurred, “but I don't think that means they'll want to see me...”
“Well...”
Twilight stiffened as Spike spoke up, having nearly forgotten he was there. Her first reaction was to shush him before he said anything, but something held her back. It may have been some form of 'sisterly' instincts, or perhaps because his tone didn't sound as hostile as it did before. Whatever it was, it made her keep quiet and listen.
Mort looked at Spike, and understandably, not without some air of apprehension. “Yeah...?”
Spike fidgeted on top of her, as if struggling with the words. “Um, okay...you're sorry about what happened, right?”
“Of course I am!” he exclaimed, as if it were obvious.
“Really sorry?” Spike asked, while sliding off Twilight’s back to land on the ground, posturing himself in front of Mort.
“Yes, really, really sorry.” Mort sighed, shaking his head.
"Oh." Spike crossed his arms, his expression souring a little. His voice was a level monotone. “Well...I guess that means you're in the clear, then.”
“Huh?” This got Mort's attention, and the hooded pony stared at Spike, his eyes having a glint of hope. “R-really?”
“Yeah,” Spike said, trying to sound as indifferent as possible. “Fluttershy's probably more upset about what happened to you then what you said. She'll probably want to make things right with you more than anything. And as long as you're sorry, I don't think Rarity will be mad at your for long. She's not that kind of pony! She's...” A dreamy sigh escaped his lips, and Twilight braced herself for what was to come.
“She's just the kindest, sweetest pony in all Equestria,” he continued, his heart aflutter, “who's as beautiful on the outside as she in on the inside, with a heart that's prettier and more pure than any ruby or diamond...”
Twilight could almost gag on the sap that spewed from Spike's mouth. Even his pupils seemed heart shaped, though she rationalized that was just a trick of the light. (An argument that didn't work so well in explaining the fluttering hearts that encircled his head.) She wasn't looking forward to his more hormonal years.
Regardless, though, it seemed to have had some effect on Mort. The cloaked pony was now looking at Spike with keen interest. His eyes squinted, his head tilted from one side to the other, and his horn glowed slightly as well. She remembered seeing him do the same thing when he first saw Rarity's suit; she'd have to ask him about that sometime.
Spike, finally taking notice, snapped out of his day dream and fixed Mort with a look. “What?” he asked, defensively.
“You...” Mort scratched his chin, as if struggling for the right words. “You...like her, don't you?”
A look of panic flashed across Spike's face. “Huh?! W-well, yeah! Everyone likes Rarity! That's not weird!”
“Yeah, but you like...like her,” he said, as if just beginning to grasp the idea. He gasped suddenly. “That's why you've been so upset! You have a, a...what do they call it...a crush on her!”
Twilight stifled a giggle as Spike's face turned bright red. “W-what?! Who told you that?!” he demanded, pointing an accusing claw at him. “It was Twilight, wasn't it?!”
Twilight stared incredulously at Mort as he spoke, the hooded pony almost sounding giddy. “That's just incredible! A dragon liking a pony like that! I've never seen anything like it!” He held a hoof to his mouth, giggling like a foal.
“Come on, I'm trying to be nice here!” Spike steamed, giving Mort a heated look. “It's not that funny!”
Mort suddenly stopped, and looked at Spike with a sorry expression (or at least she thought it was; again, it was hard to tell). “O-oh, no, I don't think it's funny. Actually, I think it's really sweet.”
That anger that seemed to be welling up in Spike fizzled all at once, to be replaced with pure confusion. “Huh?”
“I think it's great you care so much about your friends,” Mort said, sounding moved. He reached out, gently patting Spike on the head. “You're a really good dragon, Spike. I bet Twilight's proud of you.”
She really was, especially now. Without needing to vocalize it, she bent her head forwarded, nuzzling Spike on the cheek. The baby dragon immediately protested, too flustered and embarrassed to get out a coherent response.
“G-geeze, stop it, Twilight! Not in public!” After a few more seconds, she let him push her head away. She watched in amusement as he dusted himself off, brushing his head fins back in an apparent attempt to look “cool”.
“Okay,” he breathed, watching the two of them wearily. “I've met my 'touchy-feely' quota for the day, all right? Now if you don't mind, I'm going for some ice cream...”
He ran off to the vendor, leaving the two alone. Mort watched the dragon scramble to the cart, where he struggled to get himself noticed by the significantly taller stallion, before finally deciding to climb up to the top, surprising the vendor.
“Celestia must really have a lot of faith in you,” Mort said.
Twilight smiled modestly. “Well, yeah, finding the Elements of Harmony and saving the world a few times would do that.”
“Well, yeah, but she must have trusted your before that,” he said, with a touch of praise. “Especially if Spike's anything to go by.”
She arched an eyebrow. “Why?”
"You're raising him,” he empathized. “Think about it Twilight, he's a dragon. Dragons are...well, jerks most of the time. They got huge egos, are extremely territorial, and have an almost unhealthy fascination with precious metals and gems. And you don't want to know what the really nasty ones would do to trespassers.” Mort shuddered involuntarily, making an unusual rattling noise.
“But Spike's not like that!” she said defensively, feeling a flare of irritation.
“Exactly!” he said. “Thanks to you, he's nothing like that! He obviously cares a lot about you and your friends. And...well, think about it: he's cute and cuddly now, but he's going to be big and powerful when he grows up. And he'll live a long time, much longer than most other creatures. He's going to act and live according to how you raised him...and that's going to have big ramifications for a couple centuries, at least.
“Of all the ponies in Equestria to entrust Spike to, of every soldier, scholar, or ruler, Celestia picked you above all of them. That is...” Mort laughed softly, holding his head in one hoof. “That is a really big deal! You could be giving Equestria a real gift, when you think about it.”
“Oh, well...” Twilight fidgeted with her front hooves, suddenly feeling as if a large weight was placed upon her. She felt her head swim. “I...gee, I never thought of it that way...”
She pivoted her head to spot Spike still sitting on top of the cart, chatting away with the pony as he went about scooping ice cream into a big bowl. She had always seen Spike as her faithful assistant, dear friend and even close family. She never gave much thought to what it would mean when he really grew up.
It was a little exciting, but also a little scary. Dragons did not have the best reputations in Equestria (arguably for good reason), but she hadn't considered what that would mean for Spike. There were plenty of upstanding ponies who may have made mistakes when they were younger, but it was nothing compared to what a dragon could do. What if she messed up? What would happen to Spike?
Mort must have noticed her expression, because a moment later he was quickly saying, “A-anyway I don't think you have anything to worry about. You're obviously doing a pretty good job and Spike's got plenty of good role models. I bet everything's going to turn out great with him!”
She couldn't help but smile at the almost manic manner in which he spoke, eager to alleviate her concerns. She was all too familiar with that reaction, especially when she thought of her times with Celestia, and how Celestia's responses did more to calm Twilight down then visa versa.
“You're right,” she said. “So long as I'm around and my friends are helping, I don't have to worry about Spike. And he's already shown me he can do the right thing, even without me telling him to.”
Mort sighed in relief, a feeling that Twilight also shared. While she now had to think about how to raise Spike as he got older and bigger, she had complete faith that he would always do his best to do the right thing.
But one thing nagged at her.
“Mort?”
“Yes?”
“Where did you hear about me getting Spike from Celestia?”
Mort stared at her unblinkingly. “...What?”
“Well, it's not all that well known,” she explained, suddenly bothered by his vacant expression. “We might be kinda famous, but that's not something I told a lot of ponies.”
Mort twiddled his forehooves nervously. “O-oh, well, I end up passing through Canterlot an awful lot, you know? A-and you know how they are up there, always gossiping and everything. I probably just picked it up from there...”
“Really?” she said, sounding more skeptical then she intended.
Mort shrugged helplessly. “Well, there aren't that many ponies with dragon assistants...”
“That's true...” She supposed that her getting a dragon for an assistant would be something of a “big deal,” but that had been ages ago. It was a wonder anypony would still talk about it.
Her train of thought was interrupted when her eyes caught the necklace around his neck. “Is that really important to you, Mort?”
“Huh? This?” Mort grasped the medallion with the tips of his forehooves. “Oh, you have no idea! This is...well, it's a special gift from a good friend of mine.”
“The one that was busy?”
Mort's shoulders slumped. “Yeah...really busy...”
Twilight once again looked at the design of the medallion. She had the inkling of an idea that she had initially dismissed at Rarity's boutique, but she found herself returning to it more and more often. She couldn't confirm anything until she got back to the library, though...
Spike then chose that moment to come back, balancing a bowl of Neighapolitan ice cream on his head, and also bringing not one, but two ice cream cones. He stopped in front of Twilight, holding out a cone that was piled high with rocky road scoops.
“Here you go, Twilight,” he said, grinning at her. “Your favorite!”
“Aw, you're so thoughtful!” She levitated the cone out of his hand, and started on it right away, giggling at the icy sensation. She stopped mid-lick to see Spike offering the other cone to Mort, though going through great pains to make it not look like a big deal.
“Uh, here,” he said, glancing away from Mort. “I didn't really know what you liked, so I just got you strawberry. With sprinkles.”
Mort oohed as he looked at the cone, levitating it out of Spikes hand just as she did. He rotated it in place, almost looking fascinated by it.
She started to lick her cone again and Spike dug into his own bowl, keeping an eye on Mort. A minute passed, and still the stallion hadn't even touched his ice cream. He twirled it in front of him, his magic keeping it in one piece as he turned it upside down and on its side. Like an archeologist who had just discovered a new fossil.
“Something wrong, Mort?” she asked.
“Huh? O-oh, nothing, uh...” Mort stared at his cone a moment longer, occasionally glancing at her and Spike, before the whole thing disappeared inside his hood with a very audible gulp. Twilight felt her jaw drop, and she could see Spike frozen in mid-bite, ice cream slowly dripping off his spoon.
“Hmm, hmm!” Mort said, nodding vigorously. “Good stuff! Really! Yum yum!” The enthusiasm soon left his voice, as he realized the stares he received. “Um...thank you?”
“No wonder you weren't hurt,” Spike whispered in awe. “Even your brain's made of iron!”
“Well, I'm glad you really liked it,” Twilight giggled after a moment, “but, uh, next time, maybe you should take a couple bites before swallowing the whole thing.”
“Heh heh, uh, I'll keep that in mind,” Mort said, scratching his head.
The three of them sat in silence. It wasn't an awkward silence, like before; it was calm and relaxing, quiet not because they couldn't think of anything to say, but because there was simply nothing to say. A breeze had picked up, and together with the shade, it made the hot afternoon feel like a comfortable day in early spring.
The park was quickly filling up; friends were meeting and gossiping with each other by the fountain, families were settling down under shady trees to unpack their lunches or books. Some had brought kites, ready to take advantage of the sudden wind.
“I like this,” Mort finally said, his voice peaceful. “I'm practically on the move all the time, you know. I can't really stick around to see stuff like this. But when I do, it's...” He trailed off, searching for an appropriate word. “Nice,” he said finally.
“It really is.” Twilight said, finishing the last of her ice cream, before eating the cone. “One of the nice things about a small town, you get to know everypony, sooner or later.”
“That so? Hmm...” His eyes turned towards a bench, where a mint green unicorn and a creamy earth pony were sitting, the former in an awkward position that Twilight could never figure out. “How about those two? Do you know them?”
“Oh, yeah! That's Lyra and Bon-Bon,” Twilight explained. “Lyra likes playing, well, the lyre, and Bon-Bon can make some really good sweets. Pinkie Pie sometimes invites her to help at Sugarcube Corner.”
“I take it they're friends?” he asked.
“Yep,” she said, with a knowing look, “you could say they're very good friends.”
Mort looked at her blankly, tilting his head to one side.
“Uh, nevermind,” she said, her face flushing as Spike giggled next to her.
Mort took another look around, and pointed in another direction. “How about that mare over there? With the picnic basket?”
Twilight looked over his shoulder, spotting a plum-colored pony, with a grape and strawberry cutie mark, digging her head inside a picnic basket. Beside her, a small foal was sitting in front of a plate, fidgeting impatiently. She was instantly recognizable.
“Oh, that's Berry Punch,” she said. “She brews up and sells a lot of grape juice in Ponyville.”
“Huh...that's a lot of juice to bring for two ponies,” Mort commented, as the mare across the park brought out several bottles and cups. The foal was poured a simple cup of apple juice that she recognized from Applejack's farm, while the mother poured herself several cups of different juices.
Twilight giggled. “She's probably trying out a few, new recipes today. That pony has pretty exquisite tastes.”
“And that's the Flower Trio over there,” Spike commented, pointing to three earth ponies. They were playing with kites, with each mare bearing a different flower-based cutie mark. Twilight had seen them around town all the time, and they were practically attached at the hip. “I think Lily's still getting over her bunnyphobia.”
“Bunnyphobia?” Mort asked.
“From a bunny stampede,” Spike stated.
“Bunny stampede?”
Spike would never get tired of telling that story. “It's a long story,” she said. “Though the correct term is Leporiphobia, Spike, and she is doing better.”
Mort chuckled. “Wow, I should've swung by this town more often. Now how about...huh?”
“What is it?” she asked.
“Uh, that guy,” Mort pointed to a brown earth pony trotting down the path, an hourglass cutie mark on his flank. “Is he here often?”
“Oh, yeah, I've seen him around town a few times. He's...um...I'm not actually sure,” she admitted, with an embarrassed chuckle. So much for knowing everypony. “Do you remember, Spike?”
The baby dragon shrugged, gulping down a spoonful of ice cream. “Um, I think...Time Turner? I hear he's a doctor of...I don't know, something. Maybe clocks?”
Mort was still staring at him, as if entranced. “You've seen him before, Mort?” she asked.
“Ten times, at least,” he said.
“Really? Wow! He must get around a lot, then!”
Mort sighed, sounding exhausted. “You have no idea.”
“Hmm...” Twilight scanned the park again, looking for other ponies to point out. While she recognized a few of them, and even recalled their names, there wasn't much else she could speak of. Who she really wanted to see, though, was a certain pegasus that just might give Mort an extra boost of confidence. Problem was, she didn't see even a hint of her anywhere.
Mort took notice of what she was doing, and asked, “Are you looking for someone?”
“Yeah,” she said, not able to hide her disappointment. “I just figured she'd be done with her route by now, and maybe be around here. I guess it was kind of a long shot, though.”
“Route?” he asked.
“Right. You see, she's—” Before she could finish, something suddenly fell from the sky and impaled itself on Mort's horn. The cloaked pony jumped in surprise, before he cautiously reached up and grabbed what had been skewered on his horn, cutting it cleanly in two as he pulled it off. It took the librarian a moment to realize it was a muffin.
Twilight glanced up, confirmed her fears, and jumped out of the way. Before she could shout a warning, it was too late. A large, bulging mail bag fell from the sky and landed on top of Mort, scattering letters and packages everywhere. When the shower of mail subsided, Mort was still standing in the same spot, holding the remains of a muffin, and wearing half-a-dozen envelopes on his horn.
Mort's response was a flat, “What.”
“Oh no, oh no!” Twilight watched as a gray blur flew down from the sky and stopped just above the three of them, looking at Mort in mortified embarrassment. “Are you okay, mister?” the blond pegasus asked, peeking from behind her forehooves.
“Um...yes,” he said, awkwardly. He glanced up at the letters stuck to him, flicking them with a hoof. “Um, are these yours?”
Spike snorted, almost choking on his ice cream. “Nice aim, Derpy!”
“She does have an uncanny aim,” Twilight recalled. She rubbed the top of her head as she remembered her first, painful encounter with that fact.
Derpy Hooves' face turned bright crimson. “Oh, I'm so sorry! That's never happened before! I just don't know what went wrong...”
Spike fished through the mountain of mail, looking at each letter. “Maybe it has something to do with the fact you stuffed your mail bag with...what the heck is this?” As he held up a box, its bottom suddenly gave out, releasing a bowling ball that fell on his foot. He squawked in pain, and started to hop on one foot as he blew on the other one.
“Oh...well, I guess I did have a lot of packages today,” she said sheepishly, as she repackaged the bowling ball. Noticing the letters on Mort's head, she slid the envelopes off his horn, smiling apologetically. “Um, you can keep the muffin, if you like. Think of it at as an apology, uh...um...”
“Mort,” he answered. “I'm visiting.”
“I'm actually in the middle of showing him around town,” Twilight added, as she began to gather up the loose envelopes with her magic, unconsciously organizing them by size and weight.
“Oh wow, that's great!” the mailpony squealed, landing on the ground. One eye stared straight at Mort, as the other stared at some, unseen corner. “I'm Derpy Hooves! Ponyville's number one mailmare! It's really nice to meet you!” She shook his hoof excitedly for a few seconds, causing the cloaked pony to soon grab his head.
Derpy let go, and asked, “Oh, are you okay? I didn't shake you too hard, did I?”
“N-no, I just got a little, uh, dizzy...” Mort shook his head, and for a moment Twilight swore he looked as walleyed as Derpy. When he refocused his eyes, they were glued to Derpy's own. “Um...say, uh...hm...well, how do I ask...?”
Derpy gave him a nonchalant smile. “It's my eyes, isn't it?”
Mort's own eyes shrunk, and his body stiffened. “Oh, no! I-I mean, yes, but I didn't mean to stare...um...oh, shoot...” He looked shamefully at his front hoofs, trying to hide behind his hood.
Derpy giggled. “It's okay! I'm not really worried about what anypony thinks of them, really. Not anymore.” She trotted next to Twilight, wrapping a foreleg over her shoulder. “You can thank Twilight for that,” she said appreciatively.
Twilight smiled back, glad to see how well the pegasus mare was doing. “Derpy Hooves has been Ponyville's mailmare for years now. You name it, she delivers it.”
"Wait, you said your name was...” Mort scratched his chin, looking thoughtful. "Did something happen between you two?"
“Uh huh,” Derpy said, nodding her head. “You see, the thing is I'm sometimes a little...clumsy.”
Mort glanced at the mail that still surrounded him. “I do see...”
Derpy gave a short, nervous laugh. “Well, usually it wasn't anything worse than maybe dropping something or tripping somewhere. Depth perception's kinda hard when you can't see straight all the time. But...”
Derpy paused for a moment, her smile faltering as she recalled what had happened. “But,” she continued, “it started happening so much I was getting called names, and even worse, nopony wanted to be around me. They were afraid I'd break something, or hurt them...”
Mort raised his head, staring sympathetically at Derpy. “That's awful,” he said.
She sighed, nodding in agreement. “Yeah, and it seemed the harder I tried not to be clumsy, the worse it got. I felt like I couldn't do anything right.”
“I know the feeling,” Mort intoned.
Derpy suddenly perked, and wrapped a foreleg around Twilight's shoulders. “But that's when I met Twilight,” she said, giving the unicorn a small squeeze. “When she found out what was going on, she wanted to help!”
“Well that's nice,” Mort said pleasantly. “I didn't know she kept up so much with how other ponies were doing.”
Twilight cleared her throat. “Er, actually, she dropped an encyclopedia on my head,” she said, rubbing at another spot on said head.
“That makes Derpy two for two,” Spike said, holding a pair of fingers up, as the other massaged his swollen foot.
Twilight shot Spike an annoyed look before she continued. “Well, Derpy was really upset when it happened, so when I was trying to calm her down, she told me what was happening. After I heard that, what else could I do but help her?”
Just as she was hoping, Mort was looking more engrossed by the story. “Um, how did you help her, by the way?” he asked.
“It all came down to confidence,” Twilight said. “I found that the more she was criticized, the worse she seemed to get. I finally figured out that so long as she was given encouragement alongside more constructive criticism, she would start doing better! It helped her relax and not worry about every, little thing she did—”
“Pretty surprising, coming from Twilight,” Spike remarked.
Twilight was ready to say something, but Derpy and Mort had also giggled at the little jab. Brushing it off, she continued. “—and it improved her self-esteem. I also had a little talk with someponies to let them know that they were hurting Derpy with how they acted, and to give her a chance. But most importantly...”
“Yes?” Mort leaned forward, looking expectantly at her.
She smiled knowingly. “Most importantly, I reminded her that she never did anything bad on purpose, to never think she would always hurt somepony, and that a few mistakes...”
“...doesn’t make her a bad pony,” Mort finished for her, saying the words sagely. Twilight nodded approvingly.
“Long story short, it's a lot better now!” Derpy said excitedly, her face beaming. “Some ponies even want me to come over for lunch sometime! I can't wait! I hope I can make lots of new friends, and...oh...” Her expression suddenly fell as she looked at the letters she had pulled off Mort. “Oh no...” she said sullenly.
“What is it?” Derpy held out the letters, and Twilight realized what had distressed the mailmare: all of them had a relatively large hole cut through them, courtesy of Mort's horn.
“Um, maybe they won't notice?” Spike said hopefully.
“I can't deliver them like this!” the pegasus moaned. “Not after everything that happened...”
“Not a problem, Derpy!” Twilight grabbed the letters with her magic, and levitated them in front of her. The cuts were large, but clean, and would be foal's play to repair. Even as the thought entered her mind, the paper was sealing itself, leaving no marks of ever being torn. Strange, though, that the cuts would be so thin and long. She would think a unicorn horn would leave a more circular hole...
Remembering the mailbag, she put the letters aside and went to work on it, restitching it as Rarity once taught her. In just a few seconds, the straps were reattached, looking as if they had never been torn at all. The envelopes and packages glowed as she carefully placed them all back inside the bag.
“Here you go!” the librarian said, displaying the full mailbag to the mailmare. “Good as new!”
“Oh thank you, thank you, thank you!” Derpy launched forward and wrapped her forelegs around Twilight, almost squeezing the breath out of her. “You're the best thing to ever happen to me! No, wait, maybe second best thing, or third, or...”
“How about, I'm one of the best things to happen?” she offered, eager for the equally eager mare to let go and let her breath.
“Yeah, that'll work, too!” Derpy released the unicorn, and took hold of the mailbag. “I'll be sure to go slower this time! Thanks again!”
Twilght smiled, feeling her heart swell. She still remembered how terrible she looked a few days ago, and it was great seeing her in such high spirits. “Hey, anything for a friend, right?”
Derpy nodded happily, and started to strap the mailbag around her shoulder. Twilight glanced to her right, and saw Mort staring at her. She couldn't help but feel a tad unsettled, once again unable to pin down his exact expression.
“What is it?” she asked him.
“You're really good at this,” he said, and now she was certain he was grinning. “Making a pony's life better, I mean.”
Twilight grinned, feeling her cheeks flush. She was really excited and hopeful that Derpy would keep making more friends in town. And their little meeting seemed to have helped Mort quite a bit too. Things might turn around today after all.
“Well,” Derpy said, beginning to take to the air, “I gotta get back to my route. I'll try and see you later, Twilight! And nice seeing you too, Spike.” She then dove back down, shaking Mort's hoof one more time. “And you're really lucky to have Twilight showing you around, Mort. I hope you enjoy your stay here.”
“Me too, Derpy. And, uh...thanks for the muffin,” he said, floating the two halves into his cloak.
Derpy Hooves waved at the three of them, and began to fly back into the air. Not ten feet from them, however, she suddenly stopped.
“Oh, one more thing!” she said, turning to face them.
“What?” Mort asked.
“I just wanted to say that your skull mask looks really cool.” Without another word, she took off, the bulging bag trailing behind.
Twilight arched an eyebrow, and looked at Mort. The stallion was frozen in place, his eyes seemingly even smaller than when the snakes invaded his cloak.
“'Skull mask'?” she questioned.
“Um...” Mort reached up to his hood, managing to pull it down even further. “J-just some slang for guys who, y-you know, paint their faces, uh, white, um, heh heh, kinda s-silly that she thought I...uh...” He cleared his throat loudly, and quickly said, “Anyway! Where to next?”
“Oh, uh...” She dwelled on Derpy’s comment a moment longer, before pushing it aside. She could never keep up with slang, anyway. “We're going to Sugarcube Corner next. I'm hoping we can get all my friends back together and plan something to do.”
“Sounds great!” he said, hurriedly. “So, what are we waiting for? Let's get trottin'!” He rushed past her, getting onto the path and heading back towards town, sometimes tripping a little on his cloak.
Spike climbed on top of her, resting his arms on her neck. “Uh, Twilight? Why do I feel like I'm missing something?”
Twilight didn't respond at first. She watched Mort hurry down the park path, as if trying to get away as quickly as possible. Once again, Derpy’s comment resounded in her head, and it wouldn't go away. She felt a familiar uneasiness creeping up on her.
“I'll let you know when I figure it out myself,” she answered uncertainly.
By the time all three of them were back in town, it was near noon. Spike rode on Twilight’s back, with Mort taking the lead, for once. The cloaked pony would sometimes glance back at them, give a brief look, then quickly face forward again. Twilight still wasn't sure what had him so spooked. Was there was more to the “skull mask” comment? She would have to ask her friends later. Maybe they had heard the slang somewhere before.
Her thoughts then turned to her scaly passenger. “Spike? Mort was right earlier; I am really proud of you. Especially with what you said to him. Thank you.”
The baby dragon shrugged casually. “Yeah, well...I still don't really trust him. Not a hundred percent, but I guess I could cut him a little slack. For you, anyway...”
It wasn't exactly what she had hoped to hear, but for now, it was enough. She craned her head back, just enough to rub against his cheek. “Oh, Twilight, not again! There's even more ponies here than the park!” He hid his face behind his hands, peeking out between his fingers. “Or not,” he said lamely.
Twilight stopped, and noticed for the first time that the streets were surprisingly deserted. At this time of day the residents would be in the middle of their errands and crowding the street. She hadn't seen hide or hair of anypony other than themselves.
She pushed the thought aside, and cantered up to Mort, eager to check up on him. “So, Mort,” she said, slowing so she could be beside him, “are you feeling better?”
The cloaked pony seem to stiffen in her presence, but once he turned his eyes to look at her, his walking relaxed and he gave a slow nod.
“Uh, yeah,” he said, “I'm feeling a lot better, actually. Thank you very much.”
“No thanks necessary,” she replied with a grin.
Mort looked at her a moment longer, before his horn glowed and the muffin halves floated from out of his cloak. He looked between the two halves, before putting away the smaller half and offering the larger one to Spike. “Want a muffin?
“Do I!” Spike snatched it out of the air, and started to chew on it greedily. “Hmm! I gotta tell Pinkie Pie about these! These would be great with some baked worms.”
Twilight blanched at the thought. “Anyway,” she said, trying not to get sick, “I was thinking that, maybe later today, we could swing back by the library? I have some books you might find really interesting.” And there were some books she really needed to look at herself.
“Really?” he asked, sounding surprised. “I-I mean, I don't know when I'd be able to give them back, I'm kinda all over the place...”
“I'm sure we could arrange something,” she said. “Speaking of what you want...is there anything in particular you want to do later?”
“Oh, um, I can't really decide,” he said uncertainly. “I did like how things were in the park. Maybe something...small and personal? Definitely relaxing.” He nodded, seeming surer of himself. “Yeah, something that isn't too hectic, not too loud or anything. Would that be all right?”
She paused for a moment, thinking about what they had planned. “So, nothing with too many ponies?”
“Uh, not right now.” He shook his head. “I'm still trying to get used to so many...um, noticing me, I guess.”
Twilight nodded, though at the same time thought about how Pinkie Pie had wanted to throw a 'huge party' for Mort. She might be a little disappointed, but then again, the pink pony might be just as happy, anyway. She was happy enough when it's just her friends. She could probably arrange something smaller no problem.
“Oh, here we are!” Sugarcube Corner came into view, with its iconic gingerbread roof and cupcake tower looming over them. Twilight was struck by how desolate the place was; usually there would at least be some ponies eating their food at the tables outside, but these were completely barren.
Mort whistled, impressed. “They did a pretty good job. That's not, uh...real food it's made of, right?”
“Um, no,” she replied, still bothered by the lack of ponies. “Spike found that out the hard way.”
“Twilight!” he whined. “You said you'd never tell!”
“Sorry,” she said, still distracted. “Where is everypony? It's usually a lot busier than this.”
“Maybe they're all inside?” Mort said, walking up the bubblegum pink steps, and knocking on the door three times. “Hello? Anypony there?”
Twilight looked at the windows of the shop, noticing how the drapes were pulled, preventing anyone from looking in. The silence emanating from the store was unnatural, the sort that had to be...
There was a click, and the door to the shop opened on its own. “Oh, thanks!” Mort said, and walked in.
Realization struck Twilight like a hammer, and she rushed after him. “Mort, wait!”
“What is it?” he asked, standing in the darkened room. “Say, is it always this dark?”
“Mort, you don't understand,” she said, coming through the door, barely noticing it shutting behind her. “I think Pinkie Pie—”
“SURPRISE!”
The lights came on in an instant, and Twilight found out why the streets looked so deserted: because every, single pony had crammed themselves into the shop. Tables were laid out with wrapped gifts, punch bowls, and plates piled with cupcakes, cookies, and other confectionery. Draped across the ceiling was a single banner, saying Welcome to Ponyville, Mort!
Mort voiced her thoughts well. “Oh no,” he whispered.
“HEY, MORT!” Pinkie Pie bounded on over to him, squeezing him in a tight hug. “I'm so glad you and Twilight could make it! I got about half of Ponyville here today, just so they could meet you and party with you!”
“H-half of Ponyville?” he stuttered, fright creeping into his voice. “Here?”
“Yep! It wasn't that hard at all, really! I mean, yeah, it’s way, waaay short notice, but I figured, hey, you're worth it, so I zoomed around Ponyville, grabbed as many ponies as I could, and here we are! Ready to knock your hooves off with the biggest, most exciting party EVER!”
Mort's eyes darted around the room, looking like a sheep in a den of wolves. “I...I...I...”
“Oh, you're speechless!” Pinkie Pie quickly got behind him, and began to shove him towards a group of ponies. “Here, let me introduce you to everypony! Oh, we're going to have so much fun!”
Twilight watched powerlessly as Pinkie Pie pushed the terrified pony over to the others, finding it remarkably similar to how she felt about her chances for the day going well, as well as her long-term future.
“Spike,” she droned.
“Yeah?” he replied, in a similar tone.
“There aren't really any stocks in Canterlot, right?”