//------------------------------//
// Press Meeting 
// Story: TD the Alicorn Princess 
// by BronyWriter 
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We just barely made it back into the castle before I burst out laughing again. I leaned against a door frame and pounded on the wall with one of my hooves as the memory of Blueblood's expression played in my mind over and over again. It was awesome. I don't know what it is about Blueblood, but he just seems to bring out the best in me. 

Well, the best snarker, that is.

Celestia, predictably, was not so amused. I felt her tap me on the shoulder and I took a moment to regain control again. After a few deep breaths, I looked over to her to see her positively glowering at me. I giggled again, but straightened up. "Come on, that was funny."

"It was not funny, TD," Celestia snapped. "I brought you to the event so that you could interact with ponies who you will have dealings with frequently in the future if you are going to do things like hold court. Besides that, I did not want your true identity to get out."

I snorted and rolled my eyes. "What, are they going to not believe you if you tell them that the human that they saw at the Grand Galloping Gala for a few hours didn't ascend? I mean, if you tell them that I was pulling a prank on Blueblood and that what I told Vichy was true then are they going to think you're lying?"

Celestia's eyes softened slightly, but I could tell that she was still angry with me. "I suppose not, but that behavior is inexcusable."

"It was still funny," I retorted. 

Celestia sighed and facehooved. "TD, I cannot condone those kinds of actions. I understand your behavior in dealing with Vichy, as you are quite right to call out ponies who see you only as a way to further themselves politically, but Blueblood you did for your own amusement!"

"He was hitting on me," I retorted. "He was also trying to be a brown noser." My amused expression was gone. "He was two seconds from proposing marriage!"

Celestia's anger instantly vanished, and she raised an eyebrow in interest. "Indeed?" I nodded. "I see. That does change things, but it still does not fix the fact that you revealed your identity to him."

"Nobody else saw that!" I pointed out. "Who knows th—"

My words were cut off when the door behind us burst open and the object of our conversation himself stomped into the room. 

"YOU!" he screeched. He pointed a hoof at me as I turned around, a snarl etched on his face. "I don't know how you came to be in this form, but I demand that you cease existing as such right away!" Blueblood turned his furious glare to Celestia. "I demand that you send him to the moon, Auntie Tia! He's a perfectly brutish pony and shouldn't be anywhere near Canterlot!"

"Princess Antares will be moved to Baltimare where she will take her residency," said Celestia with an evenness that I certainly wouldn't have had. "She will rule there after her coronation be away from you."

Blueblood's anger evaporated, and to my surprise I saw a smug smile cross his face. "She?" He chuckled and gave me a nasty grin. "Did you say 'she', Auntie Tia?"

I narrowed my eyes slightly. "Yeah, the Elements changed me into a princess, not a prince."

Blueblood threw back his head and the halls echoed with his uproarious laughter. "Your masculinity has left you it seems, human!" Blueblood crowed. "Good luck dealing with estrus and unwanted advances!"

Celestia opened her mouth to say something no doubt punishing, but I beat her to the punch and put my hoof on Blueblood's shoulder. He flinched back and fixed me with another snooty glare. At least his laughter stopped, though. I, on the other hoof, was smiling. 

"It's true that, yeah, the Elements messed up and made me into a princess. However, I must ask you one question." My grin became even wider. "Do you like... apples?" 

"I..." Blueblood gave me a bewildered look and glanced over at Celestia who seemed just as confused by the question as he was. "E... excuse me?"

"Apples," I repeated patiently. "I would like to know if you like apples. Not apple pies, apple fritters, or anything like that." I leaned against the wall and began idly examining my shoe. "Just apples."

"Well..." Blueblood studied me for a moment, but seemed to figure that I wasn't going joking about the question. "Y-yes, I suppose that I do. What of it?"

My smile tripled in size and I leaned forward, pressing my forehead against his. "Because I'm an immortal alicorn goddess who has wings to go with his superior horn. I have more power than you could ever dream of, and I can use it to make your life miserable in ways that your aunt can't block because she doesn't know how to block them." I straightened back up and leaned back against the wall. "How do you like them apples?"

Blueblood let out a quiet squeak, but his face contorted with rage, and he slammed his hoof on the tile. "How dare you, you insolent foal! How dare you threaten me!"

"Yeah, well, your mo—"

"ENOUGH!" 

Celestia's potent display of the Royal Canterlot Voice was enough to get us to both quiet down. We both turned our attention to her. I have to admit: Celestia can be intimidating when she's glaring at you and her wings are spread to their full extent. Blueblood and I wasted no time in stepping away from each other and flattening our ears.

Celestia growled and walked in between the two of us. "Now I want you both to listen to me." She shot us both glares. "I expect better from the both of you if you are going to be a new ruling princess, Antares." I didn't even bother trying to retort. It wouldn't get me anything anyway. "Now..." She turned to Blueblood. "You are not to antagonize Princess Antares with any more attempts to use her to gain power. You are not to antagonize her period, is that understood?"

"Yes, Auntie," Blueblood grumbled. 

"Good. You are dismissed." She turned to me. "You will hold a press conference tomorrow. In it, we will explain your origins and what your plans for Equestria are. You will be on your best behavior." Her eyes narrowed even more and she leaned in a touch closer to me. "No more incidents like with Blueblood, is that clear?"

"Crystal," I grumbled, having gotten over some of the shock of her RCV. Blueblood was gone too, so that made a difference. "I take it my words will be scripted?"

"To an extent," Celestia admitted. "My sister and I will come up with the explanation for your appearance. On top of that, we will talk about what you are the princess of, as well as your coronation date."

"Yeah... that." I grimaced and looked out the nearby stained glass window. In truth, I wasn't sure how much I wanted to get deeply involved in the political system. I was quite excited to create my new guard, but holding court and going to fancy events like the garden party I had just been to wasn't appealing to me. Still, I almost felt that I owed it to Twilight to actually be a princess in her stead. She would have risen to the challenge, and it almost felt cowardly to just ignore what had happened to me. 

I took a deep breath and fluttered my wings. "When will we do it?"


*  *  *  *


Two days later, I was standing beside Luna, Cadance, and Celestia in front of a crowd of at least six thousand ponies. You'd better believe that was intimidating. Celestia assured me that it would be a short one; just long enough to explain what I was the princess of and where I had come from. I was wearing my regalia again, Celestia told me that it would be my default regalia, only this time I had a crown on that was something akin to Celestia's. 

The past two days had been more of the same, really. I sat in court again, which was just as boring, and went to another get-together with the nobility. Celestia, Luna, and I talked a little more about the kind of responsibilities I'd have, but they assured me that I'd start out slow. 

As the crowd continued to chatter about what was pretty much the most important announcement since the return of Luna, Celestia raised her wings and the crowd quieted down. She stepped up to the microphone and smiled serenely at the crowd. 

"Mares and gentlecolts, I thank you all for coming out today. As you may have heard, a new princess has appeared in Equestria." She motioned to me with a wing, and I stepped up beside her. "This is Princess Antares, the soon to be fourth princess. She will take up her residency in Baltimare." 

A murmur went through the crowd, and Celestia let them talk for a few seconds before raising her wing again. "Now, there have been rumors that Princess Antares is the human that was at the Grand Galloping Gala this past year. These rumors are false. The human known as TD has been returned to his own dimension."

I had to hold back a scowl and I ground my teeth together at that. It kind of hurt hearing her say that as I wished more than anything that it was true. Heck, I might even go back in this form if it meant going back to the familiar. 

Having said that, now that I was in this form, maybe I would have enough power to do some portal research of my own. 

Anyhoo, Princess Celestia was still talking, so I tuned back in to her. 

"At this time I cannot reveal the details of Princess Antares' origins, but I assure you that she is perfectly safe, and she will be a just ruler." Celestia's serene smile widened, and she motioned to me with a wing again. "In fact, why don't you meet her? Mares and gentlecolts, I present to you Princess Antares."

The audience stomp applauded, and I stepped up to the microphone as Celestia stepped down. I looked out at the crowd of expectant ponies and cleared my throat. My stomach was tied into a million knots, but I took a deep breath. "Hello." There's that eloquence under pressure again. "My name is Princess Antares. I came here almost a week ago, and now I am another princess. I am the princess of snark, sarcasm, education, foal services..."

Now, that was all that we had agreed on, but a wonderfully mischievous thought entered my mind as I listed off what I was the princess of. If I was going to be in front of everybody, I had to have a little fun to relax. At Celestia's expense was even better. My nervous expression fell away to be replaced by a smile. 

"And pastries. Especially cake." 

I could almost hear Celestia squeak behind me. She wouldn't dare contradict me as she wanted to present me as a strong figure, so there wasn't much she could do about it at this point. Even if she denied it in private, she couldn't deny it in public. The princess of cake I was. Seems that Celestia would be dieting after all. 

However, the rush of getting a small victory over Celestia was short lived, and I found my words leaving me already. "Uh... well, I'm not sure what else to say." I looked over to the nearby press section. "Is there anything in particular that you want to know?"

Immediately, every single reporters' hooves shot up, and I subtly flinched back. I recovered, though, and pointed at the one in the dead center. She stood up. "So, would you mind explaining to me what the fight between you and Princess Celestia was about? There are talks from Ponyville that it came to blows between the two of you."

"Ah... yes, yes it did." I shrugged. "Yeah, we fought. We had a frank exchange of ideas with our hooves, is what I guess you could call it." A small smile crossed my face. "Suffice to say, I was shocked when I appeared in Ponyville like this."

"'Like this'?" The reporter frowned. "That's implying that you had a separate form before you came to be here."

"Yeah, like human maybe?" another reporter chimed in. "As far as I'm aware, the only being to punch Princess Celestia was the human, correct?"

I shrugged again. "I have heard that, yes." I snorted. "But really, punching Celestia isn't something that only humans can do. Besides, she fought back the last time." 

"It would be best if we moved on from that subject," said Celestia. "It is unimportant."

The reporters inclined their heads in bows, and raised their hooves again. I pointed to one in the back row. "Princess Antares, what will your court look like?"

"I don't know when I will start it, but I will be easing into it. Basically it's just for ponies who can't travel to Canterlot, but need a princess to speak to." My face darkened slightly, and I looked out into the crowd. "I'm just gonna tell you right now, though: I will not tolerate petty squabbles. All issues brought to my attention that waste my time will be directed towards the special guard I am creating." 

"Can you give us any details on them?" 

My expression slid back to a mischievous smile. "I cannot give details at this time. All I can say is that in two weeks, open tryouts for my guard will be held in Baltimare. They will be..." I chuckled lightly, "quite the soldiers, I can tell you that."

A few flashbulbs went off, and I motioned for a few more questions. 

"Princess Antares, can you tell us about your lack of a cutie mark?"

Ah, there was one that I had been waiting for. I sighed and glanced back at my blank flank. "The truth is, I don't know why I don't have a cutie mark. Those of you who guessed that I was a different species before are correct; though I won't say which one. I went through my ascension and didn't get a cutie mark." A confident smile crossed my face, and I straightened up. "But you know, I don't really think that I need one to be a good princess, do you? Sure I'm not sure what I'm going to be best at amongst my titles, but you'd better believe that I'm going to be the best darned princess of snark and sarcasm that you've ever seen!" I scoffed and rolled my eyes. "I'm the only princess of snark and sarcasm you've ever seen, but if there are a million more after me I'm going to beat them all." 

"But what does that entail; being the princess of snark and sarcasm?" asked another reporter. 

"It means I'm going to give an honest, yet sarcastic, answer to every dumb question," I snarked. "It means that I'm not going to tolerate shallowness or pettiness in my court. Heck, I'm not going to tolerate it wherever I see it!" I puffed out my chest and raised my hoof into the air. "Snark and sarcasm is nature's antithesis to stupidity! I'll be honest, ponies can be dumb. I'm here to eradicate that with the best weapons ever! While I'm doing that, I will be the champion of foals throughout Equestria, I will improve the school system..."

Thinking Brain, I can't wait to meet you again.

"And I will make sure that pastries of all forms are respected!" I slammed my hoof on the podium in front of me. "For I am Princess Antares!"

The crowd erupted into loud cheers, and I even heard the other princesses stomping along with them. I was feeling pretty good about myself. So good, that I almost missed the flash of light behind me. 

Almost, but I caught it. 

I looked behind me and was unsurprised to see that my cutie mark had appeared. It appeared to be a sharp scorpion with a blood red star in the middle, which I supposed made sense given that Antares was part of Scorpio, Antares is a red star, and scorpions were highly maternal creatures and I was the princess of foal services.

Huh, not bad.