• Published 18th Nov 2013
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The Life of a Non-Brony - BronyWriter



TD's life in Equestria after the events of Wanderings of a Non-Brony

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34-Bats

Perhaps I wasn't clear about my feelings on the matter, because they knock on the door again only a few seconds after I close it.

"Mr. Powell, if you would just let--"

"Get off of my porch or I will make life hell for you," I respond quite reasonably.

"Mr. Powell, we just want to explain--"

"Unless you are explaining that you're just about to take one hoof and put it in front of the other to take a long walk off of a short pier, we have nothing to say to each other ever again."

"Comet--"

"Is my daughter, do you understand? As I'm sure you know, I recently came into a lot of money. I will throw it all away to thoroughly crush you."

"We didn't want to give her up, Mr. Powell!" the female one said. "If you just give us a chance to explain what happened, I'm sure you can see why we're here!"

"You're here to get Comet. You already said that." I lean against the door and tap Reginald against it. "Not happening. You filled out paperwork to give her up for adoption, so you have no more rights to her than Discord." I open the door a crack and put my hand through the hole, my middle finger extended for a moment before closing the door on them again. "Buzz off. She's my daughter."

"Mr. Powell, please be reasonable!" the female one says.

"Reasonable?" I open the front door just enough to poke my head through. "Okay, how's this for 'reasonable?' I spent more time raising Comet and loving her just today than you have in her entire life! You have no claim to her in any way, shape or form, do you understand that? I gave Comet love! I gave Comet a father! I gave Comet a home! You gave Comet to an orphanage!" I move my head back and slam the door. "Get off of my porch now."

"TD?" I turn and my stomach drops when I see both Cheerilee and Comet standing at the foot of the stairs, looking at me with uncertainty. "What's going on? Is something wrong?"

"Is it ponies who want to be mean about your book?" Comet asks. "Like those ponies in Fillydelphia who said it was all lies?"

"Comet?!" I hear the mare shout from the other side of the door. She begins banging on it and shouting Comet's name.

"What's going on?" Comet whimpers, backing away. "Who are they?"

"It's us, Comet!" the stallion shouts. "We're your parents! Your real parents!"

"Excuse me? Cheerilee snarls, throwing the door open and glaring at the ponies on the other side. "That's just rich! The last time you saw Comet was when you were signing paperwork to send her away! You are no more her parents than Discord is!"

"Discord didn't carry Comet for eleven months and neither did you!" the mare responds, poking Cheerilee in the chest. "Comet isn't your flesh and blood!"

"Oh yeah, if Comet is your flesh and blood, why did you give her up?" I retort.

"Well..." The bat ponies look uncomfortable at that. "We didn't want to, but at the same time, we weren't really in a position to take care of her when she was born," the male one says.

"So..." Comet walks up to me and nuzzles against my leg. "I'm an accident?"

The fire goes out of all four of us when Comet asks that. I reach my hand down and stroke her mane.

"Hey, you are not an accident, alright? You are a wonderful filly."

"B-but i-if they didn't mean to have me, and gave me up when I was born, doesn't that make me an accident?" Comet whimpers. "I-if I wasn't then they would have kept me."

"Comet, we made a mistake," the male says. "We want to make it up to you now. You'll be happy, you'll see."

Comet glares at the male and backs away. "I'm happy here! If you really want me to be happy, you'll leave me alone!"

"Comet..." The male tries to move a little closer. "If you come home with us, I'll let you ride on my back the whole way. You--"

Comet flares her wings and begins hissing at him while backing away, but I can also see tears brimming in her eyes. He tries to get into the house, but a little nudge from Reginald stops that. A look of desperation crosses his face as he reaches out to my daughter. "Comet, if you'll just--"

"FUCK YOU!" Comet roars. With that announcement, she begins spinning a tapestry of profanity directed at her parents that I have not heard before or since. The words she spews at them would make George Carlin shed a tear of pride. The four of us can only stand there in shock as she calls them every single nasty name under the moon. It's... actually kind of impressive.

Eventually she wears herself out and bolts to her room. The bat ponies try to get in to talk to her some more, but once again I nudge them back with Reginald.

"I think she made her feelings on the matter quite clear," I growl. "Now you will get off of my porch and away from my house and daughter."

"Mr. Powell... I..." The male glares at me. "What have you been teaching our daughter?!"

"Oh, that's us now, is it?" Cheerilee snaps. "If you must know, she picked up those words at the orphanage which, if you recall, you put her in!"

"And if we're being honest, I agree with everything she just said." Cheerilee and I back away from the door frame. "Goodbye."

"We're going to get her back, Mr. Powell!" the mare insists. "We'll do any--"

I slam the door in her face again and lock it.

"Fuck off."

"Yes, that is my assessment, too," Cheerilee agrees. "Fuck off."

We walk away from the door, but I don't doubt that the bat ponies are still there, hoping that we'll give our daughter back to them. No, I can't even say back to them. She was never theirs to begin with.

"We're going to have to do something about this," Cheerilee mutters as we walk up the stairs to Comet's room.

"Yeah, I know," I mutter. "We really just have to last the night. Then we can get Princess Celestia over here to personally explain adoption law to them."

"But what if they don't listen?" Cheerilee whispers fearfully. "What if they try to foalnap Comet? We could never see her again!" She puts a hoof on my leg. "Maybe we can go back to Saddle Arabia until Princess Celestia--"

"No, we're not doing that," I growl. "I'm not letting those stupid ponies run me out of my own house. We're staying here, and we're going to let Comet know she's safe here. Always."

"You're right. I'm still worried that they might try something."

"If they do, we'll handle it." We reach Comet's room and stop at her door. "For tonight, Comet's going to sleep in our room with you. Lock the window and put the curtains over it. I'm going to make sure they don't do anything."

We open the door to Comet's room and move over to the bed. I lay down and scoot underneath it, where Comet is shivering.

"It's okay," I soothe. "They're not gonna take you away."

"I'm not an accident!" Comet whimpers. "I don't wanna be an accident!"

"You're not an accident, I promise. No filly as wonderful as you could be an accident." I gently put my hand on her back. "I know your dad scared you, but neither of them are going to take you away. I promise."

Comet sniffles and scoots closer to me, allowing me to wrap her up in a hug. She nestles into my embrace and nuzzles my arm.

"You're my daddy."

* * * *

I finish strapping my knife belt on just as I reach the door. I move Reginald to my left hand and open the door. The bat ponies are gone, but I doubt that they've given up. Besides, just because they're not on my porch anymore doesn't mean they're not around my house. They're bat ponies. The night is their element. It's just past midnight at this point. I've got about six hours until dawn. I can keep them away until then. I'll do whatever I have to to keep my family safe. I take a lap around my house and don't find them, so I move to my porch and sit down on the rocking chair. It is pretty late, so I have to hope that I don't fall asleep. I stay still in the chair, Reginald firmly in my grasp, as I begin singing about leaning, just as my great-grandfather did before me, according to family legend.

Leaning. Leaning. Safe and secure from all alarms.

I scan the darkness in front of me. None of the houses are stirring and I see nothing moving. I can't hear anything from inside my house either and, if they did appear, I would definitely hear Cheerilee fighting them. I left her with one of my knives. Every twenty minutes or so I do another lap around the house, just to make sure they aren't around. I don't see them. My gut says they've left, but I don't want to take that chance. Not with Comet on the line. They aren't going to lay eyes on her ever again, if I can help it. Heck, I kind of want to take their copy of my book and tear out the picture of Comet, just so they can't see her that way either. They don't deserve to call themselves parents, not after what they did.

What a fellowship. What a joy divine.

Gotta stay awake for Comet. Occasionally I can feel my eyelids start to droop. I had a long day even before all of this started, but I stay awake. I should have made myself some coffee. Too bad Equestria doesn't have such a thing as energy drinks.

Leaning on the everlasting arms.

Gotta keep my family safe. Nothing else matters right now. I'd burn every copy of my book if it meant that they never had to worry about being safe in our house, or anywhere.

Eventually I see the sunrise and, after one more lap around my house, I know that we're fine. I go back inside, still locking the door behind me, and go into my room. Cheerilee and Comet are sleeping soundly, knowing I'm protecting them. Cheerilee still has the knife on her bedside table. The window is still locked with the curtains over it. Seems like we made it. I do a quick check through the house just to make sure. Seems good.

Ug. Maybe I take a day off of work to make sure everything is okay. That and to take a nap. I'm sure Mayor Mare would understand if I take a day off because two bat ponies are trying to foalnap my daughter.

I'll think about all of that later. For now, I need to go snuggle up with my wife and daughter.

* * * *

"Nightmare Night, what a fright, give me something sweet to bite!"

"Oho, aren't you just adorable?" Mrs. Cake says, putting a hoof on her chest while Comet gives her the cutest look she can. Which I’ll admit is pretty cute, especially given her costume. "And what are you this evening?"

"I'm a character from one of Dad's stories back on Earth!" Comet rotates to show Mrs. Cake her whole costume. "His name is Snoopy!"

"We're all characters from those stories," I say as Mrs. Cake puts a hoofful of candy in Comet's bag. "I'm going as Charlie Brown..." I motion to my yellow shirt. "And Cheerilee here is Lucy."

"It seemed like a fun idea," Cheerilee says, adjusting the blue dress she's wearing. "And I think the costumes turned out pretty well."

"Rarity does good work, yes," Mrs. Cake agrees. "You'll have to tell me the story about Snoopy later. Maybe that can be your next book? Earth stories?"

"Possibly, if I wanted to do another one." It's actually not that bad of an idea, provided I can remember a lot of them. I haven't seen a single reference to an Earth story outside of the notebooks I left Twilight in over thirteen years. Those might be a good thing to organize and publish next.

I did need to try to get credit for the Earth movies that had been adapted in Equestria. I doubt I'd get any money from that, not really sure I'd want any anyway, but it'd be nice if ponies knew those were Earth stories first. Especially given that the pony version of The Godfather won six "Celestias", AKA, the pony version of the Oscars.

I push those thoughts aside as we say goodbye to Mrs. Cake. I check my watch and see that it's just about ten PM. "Hey, you two, it's just about time to hit the Nightmare Moon statue for the candy offering."

"Cool!" Comet says, bouncing up and down in her excitement. "Where's that?"

"Right over there." Cheerilee points to a group of foals gathering around Zecora. "Wait a second and I'll walk over with you."

"Aw come on, Mom, I'm not a foal," Comet whines. "None of the other fillies have their parents around!"

Yeah well, none of the other parents have to worry about their fillies being foalnapped, either. We did want to explain that to Comet, but at the same time we didn't want her to be scared going around on Nightmare Night. Nightmare Night should be creepy, not terrifying. The scares should come from fake danger, not the danger of being torn away from your parents. Was that irresponsible of us? Maybe, but Comet shouldn't have to spend the whole night looking around hoping those two bat ponies aren't around.

"I promise to not do anything to embarrass you," Cheerilee says gently. "I really just want to see you having a good time at the statue with the other foals. You won't even know I'm there."

Comet huffs and rolls her eyes. "Fine. As long as you really won't say anything to embarrass me."

"My lips are sealed," Cheerilee says, leaning down to nuzzle Comet.

"Are you coming too, Dad?" Comet asks.

"In just a moment," I respond. "I just have to check on a few things first, then I'll be right behind the two of you."

My wife and daughter head out towards the group while I walked over to a duo standing by the punch stand, talking with one another. They just looked like two ponies dressed as timberwolves having a good time. Nothing odd about them. Or they wouldn't look odd, if they weren't scanning the crowd every few seconds, not even really paying attention to their conversation. I walked up to the punch stand and grabbed myself a glass, not making eye contact with the two of them.

"Anything yet?"

The one on the right shakes her head. "Nothing so far, Mr. Powell. Of course, it is Nightmare Night, so they're probably disguised."

"Perfect time of the year for them to get close to Comet," I mutter. "I don't like how they just disappeared after I kicked them off of my porch. It's why I think they're going to use some illegal method to get to her."

"Well, so far they haven't done anything illegal, which is why we haven't arrested them," the other one says. "On that note, we did some research into the two of them. Seems like they genuinely are Comet's biological parents, unless they're identity thieves, which I find unlikely."

"At the end of the day, I really don't care who or what they are. They're not getting my daughter."

* * * *

"Was that fun, Comet?" Mom asks as we walk back to the main square.

"Totally!" I reply, buzzing my wings in excitement. "We all got to be scared but not really, and I got to get rid of those hard candies that I don't even like anyway!" I wrinkle my nose at the idea. "Why does Miss Colgate give out those mints anyway?"

"Well, she's a dentist, Comet. She doesn't want to give out candy loaded with sugar." Mom chuckles a bit. "It's a step up from my dentist at Nightmare Night when I was a filly. He used to give out tiny tubes of toothpaste."

"Eew!" I stick my tongue out that that. "That just defeats the whole purpose of tonight! The whole point is candy and dressing up!"

"Well, and the legend of Nightmare Moon."

I roll my eyes. "That too, I guess, but mostly candy and dressing up."

"I suppose I can't argue too much with that," Mom agrees. "Still though, don't eat too much of it, and once it's time for bed, you need to do a good job of brushing your teeth, especially your fangs. We wouldn't want to go see Miss Colgate after-- OOF!"

Mom flies back as a shadowy figure tackles her. I hear her cry out in pain when she hits the ground, but before I can do anything, a pair of hooves grabs me from behind and lifts me up. I try to shout but before I can, the pony who grabbed me quickly muzzles me. I start thrashing, but the pony is too strong.

"Comet, calm down! It's just us, your parents!" says the mare who tackled Mom. I stop thrashing for a moment and glare at her. She's not my real mom!

"It's all gonna be okay soon, Comet, I promise!" the stallion holding me says as he wraps a rope around my barrel, pinning my forelegs and wings down. "You can lay on my back the whole way home and feel safe."

I can't cuss them out because of the muzzle, but if I could, I'd start shouting swear words at them that would make the words I said earlier sound appropriate to use at school. I throw my head back and smack the stallion who says he's my dad but totally isn't right in the mouth. He grunts in pain, but doesn't let go.

"Let's get her out of here, Shadow," the mare who is definitely not my mom says. "We can explain it to her once we're all at home."

I begin thrashing and trying to scream again as my real Mom tries to crawl over to us.

"You let her--" Mom hisses in pain and grabs at her side.

"I'm sorry, Mrs. Powell, but we need our daughter back," the stallion says as he begins dragging me away.

"She's my daughter you bas--" Mom shouts in pain as her side hurts again.

"We're sorry, Mrs. Powell," the mare says. "We're really sorry."

The two begin flying away with me into the Everfree Forest. I guess the stallion isn't really all that strong, since he doesn't fly up too high. I try to get my wings out of the rope, but it's too tight. I whimper as I keep thrashing. I don't want them to take me away! I wanna go home!

"Comet, if you keep thrashing then I could drop you and you could get hurt!" The stallion says. "If you just calm down--"

He stops talking when a knife thuds into a tree just inches away from his head. The two of them freeze when they hear my actual daddy's voice.

"The next one is going into your neck, I swear to God."

The three of us look over to Dad who is holding a knife in each hand. He's so mad he's shaking, but even I can tell he wouldn't miss if he threw another knife. It's really scary to look at him like that, but still way less scary than these crazy ponies taking me away from my mommy and daddy.

I hear the stallion holding me gulp as he and the mare gently land. He doesn't let go of me, though. "Mr. Powell, I just--" He stops talking when Dad winds up to throw another knife. He's not even blinking.

"You read my book, I presume. It's how you found Comet," Dad says, his voice a hundred percent still, even though he's still shaking. "If you haven't, let me update you on some of the things I've done. I got in a fight with a minotaur warlord and won. I got in a fight with a griffin assassin and killed him, too. I beat Chrysalis to death for threatening Cheerilee's students." Dad slowly lowers the knife. "So, what do you think I should do now, hmm? You attacked my wife and kidnapped my daughter. I have killed many times for far less. I'm friends with Celestia herself, who actually helped me adopt Comet. If you hadn't run off, she would have come down and personally explained to you why you two have absolutely zero rights when it comes to Comet. If I killed you both right now, the courts, the princesses, heck the entirety of Equestria would see it as my absolute right. I'm protecting my family."

Dad takes a few steps forward and he glares at them. "What was your end game anyway? Did you think I'd give up and just let you have Comet if you got her out of Ponyville? I traveled the entire world for six years clutching to the vain hope that I might be able to go home. I wouldn't give up on finding Comet if it took me fifty years, which it wouldn't because Celestia would have the entire guard scouring Equestria for you. Heck, if you fled out of the country, I have friends all over the world who would help me. Good luck starting a new life in Saddle Arabia when the sultan there would send his army after you."

The mare decides that she's okay with being stupid and tries talking again. "Mr. Powell--"

Half of my dad's face turns into green fire, and when it stops, that half of his face is all twisted and weird looking, while his teeth are razor sharp fangs. He lets out a freaky inequine shriek that even freaks me out a little bit, and it definitely shuts that stupid mare up. I guess he figures that they're not gonna talk again, so he changes his face back.

"So, here's what's going to happen now. You're gonna let Comet go. Drop her right now." He winds up to throw his knife again. "NOW."

The stallion lets me go, and I land on the ground since my legs and wings are still tied up. I quickly begin crawling over to Dad as best I can, but he comes up to me and cuts the rope and muzzle off of me. We back away from the two bat ponies while I call them a bunch of things that would get me soap in my mouth on another day. I fly up and throw my forelegs around Dad's neck, trying my hardest to nuzzle up to his back.

I'm safe here. I'm on my dad's back. I'm safe here.

My jaw wobbles a little bit as Dad keeps talking to them, but I don't start crying. Dad wouldn't cry. He's strong, so I should be too.

I'm safe on my Dad's back. They can't hurt me anymore. I'm safe here. I'm safe here.

Some more ponies come up to us and put the two bat ponies in hoofcuffs and take them away. I hope they never get out of jail! Dad starts glaring at the ponies who didn't take the other bat ponies away.

"Where the heck were you?" he growls.

"We didn't have enough ponies to scan the entire party, Mr. Powell. The Ponyville police force isn't that big!" one of the ponies says. "Doesn't help that some of us kept getting called away to deal with minor disturbances. We don't have enough ponies to do both jobs!"

"Clearly. I had to do part of it for you." Dad doesn't let the police pony say anything else. He just turns around and walks away. He doesn't say anything to me, but he's still shaking. Guess he's still really mad. We go back to where the two of them grabbed me as I see a nurse checking to make sure Mom is okay.

"How is she?" Dad asks, kneeling down next to Mom. She smiles at him and he grabs her hoof.

"Nothing life-threatening," the nurse says. "I think she might have broken a few ribs, though. We'll know more when we get some X-rays at the hospital."

I whimper at that. I don't want my mom to have to go to the hospital. I guess Mom heard me, because she smiles at me. "I'll be fine, Comet. I just have to take it easy for the next little bit, that's all."

I wanna believe that, but I'm not sure I can right now. What if those two bat ponies come back then they could attack Mom again?! I don't like that idea. I don't like it when they take Mom away in an ambulance. We get to ride in it with her while the doctor checks on her, but I don't like it. Dad got my bag of candy for me, but I'm not in the mood to eat any right now. I haven't let go of him since he saved me. I'm still holding on to him. Dad's still shaking, though. I guess he's still mad at those ponies for trying to take me away, but he doesn't look mad like he did in the forest. He has one hand on one of my forelegs and another is still holding Mom's hoof. He looks kind of scared, but that can't possibly be it. He doesn't get scared. I nuzzle into Dad's back. It helps me feel safe.

We get to the hospital and the doctors take Mom away to check her ribs. Dad lays down on a couch so that I can lay on his back and be safe after taking off my costume's ears and putting them in my candy bag.

Mom's gonna be fine. She's gonna be fine, and I am too. I'm on my dad's back. It's safe here. They can't get me anymore. Everything's gonna be okay. Daddy saved me, and Princess Luna is gonna make sure they never hurt me again. It's all gonna be fine.

I hope.

Author's Note:

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