29-Hearts and Hooves Day
So, it's Hearts and Hooves Day.
Hearts and Hooves Day. Yeah.
Somehow, though, I doubt that this holiday is based off a saint who was beaten, beheaded, and buried secretly. This doesn't strike me as the kind of world that would commemorate a martyrdom with a lovey dovey holiday.
Although it could be. I'm not sure.
Anyway, the thing about Hearts and Hooves Day is that one needs a date for the holiday. However, I... I suppose that I do want a date. I want one in that I know who I would ask out if... uh... yeah.
Gulp.
I sit up in my bed and look over at Oswald who is staring at me. I give him a weak smile and scratch his head feathers. "Today's the day, Oswald. Today's the day that I finally ask her out." I take a deep breath and glance over at the calendar. "I mean, what better day than Hearts and Hooves day, right? I think that she'd find it romantic and... uh... appreciate the gesture."
I bite my lip, but decide that I might as well get out of bed. If I can't get out of bed then I can't very well ask the mare I... have an affinity for out.
I do my morning routine, hoping that a hot shower will get rid of the butterflies in my stomach. No such luck. In fact, despite the fact that I take a twenty minute shower, it goes quicker than I can imagine.
Oy. This day is going to be something else, isn't it? Just work up the nerve, TD. What's she going to say, "ha, ha, as if" and slam the door in my face? Well, it wouldn't exactly be the first time. Once a door was slammed in my face and I didn't even notice the door. We were in the middle of a field.
It was pantomime.
Whatever, I never saw her again, nor will I. I'm in ponyland forever, so there's not much chance of seeing her again.
Can't focus on that, TD. Focus on the mare you want to ask out today. Nothing else matters. Just the mare you want to ask out. I... it's no big deal, right? Okay...
I stand outside of my door and stare at it, wondering when I'm actually going to open it up and walk to the house of the mare I want to ask out. I know I'm being dumb. Really dumb, but I can't help it. It's me: TD Harrison Powell! I have nothing but dislike for the show My Little Pony, and I really dislike the situation I'm in. But, here I am, about to ask a pony out.
I'm being dumb. Just go for it, TD. Just go for it. The worst she can do is laugh in your face and slam the door, thereby destroying your confidence and your perception of your relationship. But no, she wouldn't do that, would she? Of course not. I slowly walk out the door and into Ponyville.
I begin walking through town and notice, to my complete lack of surprise, that there are quite a few couples out and about. The outdoor seating in the restaurants I pass are all full to the brim, and the weather outside is perfect. I don't see a single cloud in the sky. That's good, I guess. Yes, if my date and I want to take a walk we don't have to be worried about getting rained on or anything like that. Well, unless Rainbow Dash decides to prank us, but even she wouldn't sink so low. Any other day, maybe, but not today. Not on Hearts and Hooves Day.
One of these days I'm going to have to ask about the "hooves" portion of the name. Hearts is obvious enough, but hooves? I know these are ponies and they never run out of horse puns, but it makes no sense.
After about five minutes of walking I reach Carousel Boutique. I crack my neck and quickly move up to the front door and pound on it. Rarity did mention that she liked my improved physique, so maybe...
I pound on the door as hard as I can. If Rarity is in The Zone, and in a day like today she very well may be, she would likely not register that somebody is knocking. However, it seems my efforts paid off, and within a few seconds Rarity opens the door. Her mane is frazzled and she has a few pins behind her ears, but she smiles when she sees me.
"Oh, good morning, TD. How are you on this fine Hearts and Hooves Day?"
"Uh..." I run a hand through my hair and glance to my sides to make sure that nobody is watching. "That's actually what I wanted to talk to you about. Can I come in?"
Rarity raises an eyebrow and gives me a quizzical look. "I suppose so." She steps aside, allowing me entrance into her boutique. I walk past her and she shuts the door beside me. "What's this about, TD?"
I take a deep breath and turn to face Rarity. "So... it's Hearts and Hooves Day and all, right?"
"Well spotted, TD. What's your point?"
"And ponies usually ask each other on dates during this day, yes?"
Rarity raises her eyebrow even higher and a hint of a smile plays at her lips. "That is the point of the holiday, yes."
"So..." I bite my lip but decide that it's best to just say it. "I have somepony that I want to ask out and I need your advice."
Rarity's vague smirk turns into a full blown smile and she lets out a squeal of delight. She runs up to me and pushes herself onto her hind legs, putting her forehooves on my shoulders and her face in mine. "Ooh this is absolutely marvelous! Details, details, details! Who is it?"
I bit the bullet and told Rarity who I want to be my marefriend after she goes back on all fours, and she begins giggling and bouncing up and down. "I kneeew it!" she sings. "You two make such an adorable couple. I thought that it was only a matter of time before you actually got the nerve to ask her out."
"Yeah..." I uneasily rub the back of my neck and a slight blush appears on my face. "So like I said, I kind of need your advice on the best way to ask her out. I figured that you'd know how."'
"Well I am just beyond honored that you would choose me as your tutor in the matter." Rarity's grin widens and she nudges my leg with her elbow. "You wouldn't be the first to ask me such questions, but I guarantee that I have never disappointed in my advice."
"Good." I give a single nod. "Yes, very good." I take a deep breath and lean against one of the walls of her boutique. "So what can you tell me about asking out a mare?"
Rarity giggles and waves her hoof at me. "Having never asked out a mare myself, I can only tell you what it's been like when a stallion vies for my affections and what I have observed about my own feelings on the matter." Rarity's smile falls, and she suddenly takes on the demeanor of a strict professor. "Do not be fake in your intentions. A mare can sense that kind of thing immediately, and it will end in nothing but disaster for you."
"Okay." I nod. "Good start."
"An extension of that rule is to always be yourself. Your doubtlessly future marefriend loves you for you." Rarity reaches up and puts her hoof over my heart. "Don't deceive her by trying to be something you're not."
"Okay."
"A third thing is compliments!" Rarity's smile returns and she begins pacing in front of me. "Mares do so love it when their coltfriends, or in this case humanfriend, compliment them on whatever positive attributes they have."
"Yes. Yes that's a good one too, though I've already been doing that every now and again."
Rarity stopped pacing and gave me a flat look. 'Every now and again? Oh please, darling, you're going to have to do a little bit better than that. I'm not saying that every word out of your mouth should be flattery, but as much as she and you feel comfortable with. Do what feels natural, TD."
"Okay." I deeply sighed and nodded. "Yes I agree with that. What about date ideas, particularly first date ideas?"
Rarity snorted and rolled her eyes. "Oh please, TD, I'm hardly the mare to ask about that. If you want to ask her out then you know her rather well, don't you?"
"Yeah."
"Well then there you go," Rarity said happily. "Just do what you already like doing, but add a touch of romantic flair to it!" Rarity giggled again and rubbed her hooves together. "This is a new step in your relationship, TD, but it's a young step. It's perfectly okay to do what you used to do in the beginning." Rarity shrugged and waved her hoof at me. "Of course, once your courtship of her develops further you have to think outside of the box a little more, but I stress once again that if you know her, you will know what she likes and how best to cater to those interests in a way that will strengthen the bond."
"Right..." I slowly nodded and my gaze trailed down to the floor. "Right." I glanced back up at Rarity. "But there's one more thing I'm worried about. Say we start going out, but we break up. She's my best friend, and I don't want to lose that, particularly in my situation."
Rarity chuckled and gave me a comforting smile. She put her hoof on my arm. "TD, if I'm right about the strength of your relationship, if you do split she will want to keep that relationship. You are her best friend too, and she does not want to lose that any more than you do." Rarity tilts her head in a sort of shrug. "Will it provide a rocky period in your relationship? Doubtlessly, but as a dating couple you would endure that anyway. Romantic relationships are never easy, TD. I want to warn you of that now."
"I realize that. I've been in some relationships before." I shudder as I remember my first girlfriend. Go out on a date and the next day she breaks up with me, but she still leads me on for months making me believe that we can get back together. Well, that's not happening this time! This time I'm going to really be a man about all of this.
Which has started with asking a talking pony for advice on dating another talking pony. How odd my life has become.
I run a hand through my hair and straighten up. "Well, Rarity, I think it's time for me to go now. I have a date to get."
Rarity smiles at me and puts her hoof on my leg. "I'm sure you'll do fine, TD." Her smile fades and she taps her lower jaw thoughtfully. "I read one of the notebooks you left Twilight before you went on your six year journey. There was some quote that I found in there that I think applies, but I can't quite remember..." Rarity's smile returns, and she waves her hoof at me. "Ah yes, I remember." Her smile turns a touch sultry. "Go get 'em, tiger."
I can't help but laugh at that. I say goodbye to my romantic tutor and walk towards the door of the boutique. As I go to walk out of it, I hear Rarity mumble something that I don't think she intended me to hear.
"I can't wait to design the wedding dress! I'll have to retake TD's measurements for his tuxedo to account for his more muscular physique, of course, but that shouldn't be too--"
I've walked out and shut the door behind me by that point. Talks of wedding dresses for my potential future marefriend might be a bit fast. I mean, I'm still trying to wrap my head around the fact that I'm trying to ask out a pony. A candy colored talking pony, but a pony nonetheless.
Now armed with a little more of a plan than I had before, the air seems purer and the sun brighter as I walk towards the home of the pony I will ask out today. There's even a slight spring in my step. However, as I get closer and closer to her home, that spring is gone, and the butterflies are acting up in my stomach again. Oh my gosh, what am I doing? We're perfectly fine as friends, right? Maybe she doesn't even want to move to the next level. I don't have to tell her that I was thinking about this...
No, that wouldn't work. Rarity is going to pump me for every conceivable detail, and I can't just tell her that I chickened out at the last minute. She'd march me to my crush's house and force me to ask her out, much to both of our chagrins. She would want it to come from me.
I'm almost there now. I can see her home on the horizon, and every step brings me closer. Oh gosh, here it is. Before I know it I'm on her doorstep. Just one knock and this happens. I slowly raise my hand and, before my brain knows what's happening, my arm takes control of itself and raps on the door three times.
There's no going back now.
Unless she's not home, of course. I don't think that she had any plans for today, but you never know. She could be out with a bunch of single friends.
Except that she's not.
The door opens up and she pokes her head out of it. She smiles when she sees that it's me. "Hello, TD. How are you this morning?"
I give her a weak smile and swallow with much difficulty. "I... uh, I'm fine. H-how are you?"
She shrugs. "Oh, you know how it is. Another Hearts and Hooves Day without a date. I'm not really surprised."
"So you don't have anybody to go out with today?"
She shakes her head. "Nope. Not at all."
I so desperately want to phrase my next sentence with dignity and articulation. She deserves nothing else, but my brain has better ideas.
"Sodoyouwannagooutwithmethen?"
She gives me a puzzled look and tilts her head ever so slightly. "I'm sorry, could you repeat that? I couldn't quite make that out."
Oh for goodness sakes, why does this need to be so difficult? I just have to say it. Just that and the worst part is over. I slowly take a deep breath to center myself before trying again.
"I said, if you don't have any dates today... would you like to go out..." Good grief, TD, just say it. "With me?"
I have to admit, through all of our time together I've never seen her smile so wide. Her eyes are sparkling, and before I know it, she has wrapped me up in a tackle hug that knocks me to the ground. "I'd love to, TD!" she cries. "I'd absolutely love to!"
Well, I guess that means yes, then. I guess today I'm going out on a date...
With Cheerilee.
Happy Hearts and Hooves Day
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Duh. Did you really have to leave us waiting for the obvious for so long.
3947552 I enjoyed it.
5 words in i figured out it was the teacher
3947561 Well so did I.
Lols, I knew it was coming to this!
3947569 It took you five words? It was obvious to me since from the chapter title
And of course, hilarity ensues. Possibly including the now-much-older Crusaders.
Wait, so this isn't a dream sequence?
This isn't a joke chapter? 
I'm not sure how to take this.
Welp, I knew this, but in the other story. It would have been Twilight. Oh well.
Nopony expected that at all besides that. FUCKING finally. That is all
3947600 Nope. Very real. Is that bad?
3947602 Which other story and why do you think that?
3947552 shut up, its theatrics.
About time, TD! May the Shwartz be with you! Whattaworld whattaworld whattaworld....
if you excuse me, I have to kill purple-maned marshmallow now *cocks his revolver*
"HEY RARITY, IVE GOT A SURPRISE FOR YOUUUUUUUUU"
3947617 I said I liked it in a different comment.
A true master of suspense... minus the suspense, of course. So I guess that just makes you a master... of. I didn't minus the of. So you're a master of.
That will be all.
i like how the quality of the story has stayed the same even though you are now doing more slice of life stuff. Really awesome build up, i was getting nervous
3947629 Why would you do such a thing?
3947614 Where Twilight had comforted him before he went to the crystal heart. I thought they were going to be together, but then this story came up and I knew it would be Cheerilee.
You would have to be a naked mole rat to not have seen this coming.
3947569
I figured it out back when Cheerilee punched him for not telling her that he was going away on a trip.
Well that escalated rather interestingly.
Time to see how this date goes.
3947612 No. I just don't know how I should feel about this. Give me a few more chapters.
Also, what exactly are the numbers on the chapters? Just a question.
Like we all didn't see it coming.
I already knew who it would be from the beginning.
3947698 His age.
3947698
TD's age at the time of the chapter
Hearts
her
probably want to eliminate the period
bit is past tense while tell is present tense. So it would be "I bite the bullet and tell" or "I bit the bullet and told"
So now he's 29. I'm guessing we're going to be skipping around to different ages?
3947712
fc08.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2013/085/e/a/shut_up_to_bronywriter__by_bronywriter-d5ze3sx.jpg
All joking aside, fixed.
3947715
I FUCKING KNEW IT.
Then again it was probably obvious.
3947651 prettyy sure it saw it coming to. heck i think a blind man saw it coming... On a side note i would be 100% fine with this story having some shipping in it actually i could not see it not having shipping at some point in it.
3947667 I doth concur.
The rate of acceleration was quite steady and agreeable.
3947699
doesnt make it any less adorable!
3947720 How was it obvious?! I mean, if there was a romance tag, I might have caught it, but as it stands, this comes out of left field.
)
(Yeah, yeah, call me naïve or blind or whatever, but this went on for 2.5 stories without so much as an inkling, so forgive me for not picking up on it sooner.
3947737 I've been saying since the end of Wanderings that he was going to go out with a pony.
3947743 I came in late to the party.
This is a completely useless comment.
Ohh yeahhh.. that ending. And that song is one of my favorites. Fits faily well.
This reminds me of Harry Potter.
Personally, I wouldn't count on that.
Maybe you should be asking Oswald for advice. He's had more recent luck with the ladies than you have.
And the best part is that TD has apparently missed the fact that Rarity is talking about a wedding dress and his measurements.
Anyone else half expect Bronywriter to have him ask out Celestia (In reference to a certain spin-off), only to wake up and figure out it was just a Nightmare?
I just hope we actually get some chapters featuring their relationship before the wedding
3947797 Naturally.
The last little break I was holding my breath in anticipation. The obvious being that he was going to ask cheerilee, but there was a thought in the back of my head saying that he going to show up at some other ponys door. I'm far from disappointed with the outcome, but a like part of me wanted it to be grammy smith. Or somepony so far out of left field that would leave us speechless.
3947801 So this isn't going to crash and burn, right?
got bored on the first 2 paragrahps and skipped to the end, huehuehue