• Published 6th Jan 2016
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What If... - TheMajorTechie



A buncha stories based off of random "What if?" questions.

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Applejack got triggered by Peanut Butter?

Author's Note:

Credits to my sister, Skittle Sky for the idea. :scootangel:

We've both gone peanuts. :trollestia:

Applejack awoke to a start. It was a beautiful day outside, the sun was shining, the air was still radioactive from her prior nuclear warfare on pears, and generally, it was an excellent day for y'all ta burn in the bits o' Tartarus.

Wait, what?

Anyways, Applejack was currently making breakfast for herself. The only problem with that was that she was out of apples. Unfortunately, the only other choices were either the radioactive-but-somehow-still-standing Asian Pear tree that she nuked, or a years-old jar of peanut butter.

Naturally, she chose the peanut butter.

Though, it just so happened that she got easily triggered by the idea of peanut butter on apple slices, which now led to her being triggered by the sight of peanut butter.

"WHADDYA LOOKIN' AT?!" the mare suddenly screamed at the lonely jar of peanut butter, "WHADDYA WANT FROM MAH FAMILY?!"


Equestria, ~13 years earlier...

Applejack was happily munching on an apple slice with peanut butter, when suddenly, a tiny, squeaky voice blasted her in the face.

"WHADDYA LOOKIN' AT?!" The glob of peanut butter screamed in an extremely high pitched, macho voice, "WHADDYA WANT FROM MAH FAMILY?!"

Applejack promptly screamed, and from that day on, she didn't dare to touch peanut butter again.


The only problem now, though, is that she not only has to touch the tartarus-forbidden peanut butter, but she had to eat it, too.

Suddenly, a vortex through space-time opened up from the jar of peanut butter, sucking her into a very peanut-y, butter-y, and kind-of crunchy world.

"What the buck?" Applejack mumbled to herself after landing face-first in a peanut puddle, "Where in tarnation am I?"

A loud screech echoed from above, prompting the mare to duck down at the sight of the Aerodactyl. Except said Aerodactyl was made of peanut brittle.

In front of her, the wall toes of the sacred Twilicane revealed to Applejack not only a pair of wings, but a horn as well. Applejack initially was quite cautious about ascending to alicornhood in such an absurd way, but she had no say in the end mainly 'cause the wings and horn were currently glued to her face and body using peanut butter.

And then the world imploded with a huge explosion of buttsharks, lolcats, spinning cheese-mice, applepears, emojis, rainbows, Apple Bloom's cloned head, and Rainbow Jack's jokes.

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