• Published 6th Jan 2016
  • 4,232 Views, 2,699 Comments

What If... - TheMajorTechie



A buncha stories based off of random "What if?" questions.

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The Great Potato War happened?

Author's Note:

A continuation of this.

Keep in mind now, dear reader, that this is not the Baked Potato war, nor is it the Grape Potato War. Rather, it is the Great Potato War, in which the two princesses of Equestria valiantly defended their nation from the forces of Mr. Potato Head's army of the planet Hazboroo.


Celestia and Luna dove bravely into the center of the invading army of potatoes, their specialty weapons-- a potato peeler and a french fry cutter, respectively, shining brightly in the light of day.

Metal clashed against 'tato, spuds pummeled and destroyed countless structures...

And somehow, somewhere in the middle of it all, a high schooler with a clicky keyboard sat clacking away, intent on narrating the entire event. Or at least, until his keyboard was crushed by a potatiajo;ui3ho;hO*Y

The author now sat within a bubble universe, observing and narrating the chain of events that was the Great Potato War.


Mr. Potato Head was angry. NeighNay, enraged. How could his two favorite toy ponies betray him in such a way, when they too had descended long ago from the planet Hazboroo?

With all the might of his mighty spaghetti-like arms, he brought his plasticy fist upon the activation button for one of his most lethal weapons: The Potato...ifier...inator...thing.

With all the precision that a highly-evolved potato could muster, he put both hands on the absurdly large spud gun, and fired away, his nose becoming dangerously loose as he did so.


Soaring with the gracefulness of overgrown (and slightly more elegant) geese, or "Swans", as some may call them, Celestia and Luna easily dodged the rays, crisscrossing each other as they prepared their final attack...

With a single sentence, Mr. Potato Head was burnt to a crisp.

"I'MA FIRIN' MAH LASER!"

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