• Published 21st Oct 2017
  • 10,514 Views, 2,803 Comments

Dadonequus Discord (Book 1) - CrazedLaughter



Discord makes a deal with an anonymous human. The human gets to live a good life in Equestria. And Discord? he gets to have a son of his own. Of course, his only reason is to impress Fluttershy and annoy Twilight.

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Chapter 143 - The Nightmare Night Arc

You pull yourself out of the crater you had created from your crash landing. ".....oyyy geez.....how am I not dead?" You slowly stand, and tap whatever part of your body you could to make sure you hadn't fallen apart in some way. "...nope...I'm ok...hrn..."

You contemplate how you survived the fall. And come to two conclusions...it was either the horn, or Team Rocket Physics. In fact, you think a little harder on what ParaPara said. "I just can't cancel my magic whenever I please, huh? What does that actually really mean? I thought I could cancel it whenever I want...unless. hrn...is that why the horn doesn't pop off after immediately casting a spell sometimes? Ahhh, I think I got it! The horn doesn't pop off until the spell itself is fully cast and completed. I guess generating that battle in that way had the spell still being cast until either I or they lost...and...ugh...that's right. That's why I went flying in the first place....I lost..." You plant your hoof on your face and shake your head in utter shame. "I lost as fucking Bowser too. I mean...hell, he always loses....but....ugh"

You felt so stupid losing to them. But it was still fun. And...it was a learning experience. If anything, it helped you get a better understanding of the magic you wield. "....ok, I think I got it. Let's experiment"

You raise your hoof and create an unlit cherry bomb. "ok...easy enough...now then.." You make the cherry bomb disappear. "So the spell was complete when I made the bomb...perfect...now let's try..."

You turn around and start revving up your back legs as your back hooves start to alight in flame.
"FALCON!...." At that moment, you try to cancel it. But you cannot. The way you are using the magic is in a way that it'd work in "Smash Bros." "BUCCCCK!"

And you smash your hooves straight up as the flames in the form of a Falcon take off from your hooves. You plant your back hooves back down and stare intently at the flames that remained in mid air as they flickered and went out. "Couldn't just stop it. hrn, ok..I think I got it. I just gotta be careful and be very specific with my magic." Lesson learned. Ehhh, Chaos magic isn't that tough,

With that solved, you look up at the sky. Man, it was dark. And all the other ponies were already ready for the night. Seemed your fun was nearly over. You thought it best to find Applebloom and the others.

You look around, you weren't even near the town. You were out in an open field. "..well..damn, ok ok..shouldn't be too hard to find them. Anon...AWAYYYYYY!" You blast off to the sky and fly over the town. Invisible of course, as to not cause a commotion.

But you were having trouble spotting them. What, with everyone else in costumes. You could have already bypassed them. "....eghh....How do I solve this problem?...oh wait...of course" You use your magic to give yourself some glasses. both lenses being able to see through the costumes.

"Amazing, really. Nothing is beyond me when I have this horn....hmmm...maybe that's why Discord gets bored easily. Not much point to being omnipotent if you're alone....Ahh, there they are." All five of them. You wondered if the CMC would have been alone in their nightmare nighting if you weren't around. Or if all five of them became a group after the episode. Whatever the case, they were going to be ecstatic when they saw your Cutie Mark. You dive in and gently land behind them. Removing your glasses.

...and now you could see their costumes. Diamond was a princess, but of a more classic sense. with a more stylized tiara and a dress, Sweetie Belle was a old style debutante, Scootaloo was, obviously, a wonderbolt, You...couldn't tell what Silver Spoon was. She was wearing a nice dress...but it didn't seem very Nightmare Nighty. And then there was Applebloom...what the fuck was she? A beaver?

You sneak up to the side to get a better look at her....no...Platypus.....why a platypus?

"....Wait, how're we gonna find Anon again?" Applebloom asked "We been walking around for forever and none of us have seen him yet"

"Yeah, But it's not like we can just go to his house and ask if he's there. We're gonna miss some serious candy opportunities if we just keep looking for him. He should have met up with us an hour ago" Scootaloo said, getting more impatient by the moment.

"Well...it's not like we told him WHEN and WHERE to meet us. That's kind of our fault" Sweetie Belle said, already sounding the most sensible.

"Well, that's not my fault. Anon does hang out with the three of you more. One of you should have told him instead of just forgetting." Diamond Tiara said in a snooty tone. "And don't even go blaming me. I was in too much distress. Of course I'd forget to tell him.”

"......I actually agree with Scootaloo, we should just forget Anon.." Silver Spoon said. Of course, she had the least connection to you. So she couldn't really care.

Diamond Tiara however, get's miffed at those words. As unlike Scootaloo, that sounded like just plain giving up and forgetting you. "Are you saying we should just forget Anon? Do I have to remind you that this is his FIRST Nightmare Night with friends and it's up to me...er..." Diamond Tiara cleared her throat "Us to show him the time of his life?" Diamond Tiara gives Silver Spoon a very angry look, the stink eye basically.

Silver Spoon immediately backed off and changed her words upon seeing Diamond Tiara's anger. "...n-no, I'm just saying that if we wait too long then we all suffer. That's all. I just don't want everypony to miss out.."

...Oh geez. They had been looking for you the entire time? Well, that made you feel pretty bad. Well then, you'd just have to make your appearance.

You teleport behind them. End your invisibility. And rush up towards them. No doubt they'd question why you aren't in costume. But man...once they see it. "Girls...Girls hey! I'm here!" You rush up behind them and pretend you're tired. Panting as you look downward. "Wooo...almost thought I'd miss you all."

Four out of the five fillies greet you happily. Looking relieved that you finally showed up. All except for Diamond Tiara, who walks up to you, looking even angrier as she eyes you up and down. "Where's your costume Anon....."

"Yeah,.....you do remember you need a costume. Right Anon? If you didn't have one, you should have come to me. My sister has plenty of old costume stuff you could have used." Sweetie Belle said, looking disappointed. Hell, the rest look disappointed as well. All except for Diamond, who was just frustrated.

"Oh, he can pull his costume out whenever he wants. I'm just wondering why he hasn't." Diamond Tiara sighed, and looked at you longingly for just a moment, before changing her expression to that of annoyance. "I'm just hoping it's not a limited time kind of thing. You can't properly go out on a night like this without a costume"

Applebloom, noticing you had both your eyes. Was already able to deduce your costume was based off your magic. "Or maybe he's just gonna use a different costume, that other one was kinda creepy"

"....so his costume isn't being a unicorn?" Silver Spoon asked, noticing your unicorn horn.

"You don't know Silver Spoon? About this horn?"

"....what's so special about it? Isn't it just a costume thing?" Silver Spoon asked

"You didn't hear? That's Anon's magical horn his dad gave him. I don't know how powerful it is. But it's gotta be pretty strongl. Like Scootaloo's magical wings" Sweetie Belle informed Silver Spoon "Practically everypony knows about it by now."

".....oh. Wait...so it gives him Unicorn magic? That doesn't seem that great" Silver Spoon says, not really impressed. "It doesn't seem that great"


Not that great?...ppppffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffft "Actually, this horn let's me do whatever I want."

"What?...no way" Silver Spoon moved closer to you to get a better look at it. "Nopony can do whatever they want with Unicorn magic"

"That's because it's not Unicorn magic, duh." Diamond Tiara rolled her eyes "It's like his Dad's magic. The only difference being that Anon is responsible and would never ever do anything bad with it"

"Yup...nothing irresponsible. But she's right. It's chaos magic." You said with a single sweat drop on your brow

"Yeah, ah definitely know that's the truth...So ya really popped yer eye out with that thing?"

You nod. "Yep" You smirk. "I can show you all how I do it if any of you are interested."

Applebloom shivered and stepped back. "Ah...nah, ah think I got a pretty good memory of what it looked like"

As you grinned at the possibility of spooking them, you noticed Sweetie Belle had separated from the group. And was at your side. Staring at your flank. Well, one of them finally noticed.

"Anon......is that?" Sweetie Belle was just staring at your cutie mark, amazed.

"Is that what Sweetie Belle?" Scootaloo asked.

Sweetie Belle gives your flank a gentle rub, to see if it was real. You flinch from her touch. That was kinda lewd. "......woah...WOAH...THAT IS. THAT'S ANON'S CUTIE MARK!"

The rest of the fillies lit up at those words. "No Way, ah don't believe it!" Applebloom was amazed, flabbergasted even.

"Woah...wait...why does it have all those arrows on it? What does it even mean?" Scootaloo was confused. She didn't know what to make of it.

" It me-" Like many times before. You get interrupted. This time by Diamond Tiara.

"Isn't it obvious? All those arrows, it's gotta mean he's good at everything. It's a literal way of representing that Anon is "Going places"." In Diamond Tiara's mind, this was an absolute reasoning for you to be her prime pick. Everytime you seem to do something...or even not do something. It only seems to pull her closer to you. She....really doesn't seem to respect your personal space like Applebloom has been doing.

"What? That's silly, Anon can't be good at everything. He'd need wings to do Pegasi stuff" Scootaloo noted.

"Well....um, maybe he can." Diamond Tiara suggests, trying to overcome the fact that Scootaloo was right.

"ACTUALLY" You cut in. "It's the symbol of chaos. My Cutie Mark is the chaos symbol."

"WHAT?!" All five of them say in a collective astonishment. It actually impressed you how all five of them were taken aback from your announcement.

"Oh come on, it's not that bad. I think it's kind of cool actually. I mean, Diamond Tiara is sorta right. It means I can pretty much do whatever I want. And anything could happen. You know, when I think about it. It actually just means that I'm good at being myself....I think. I dunno, that's the feeling I get."

"Yeah but, Anon. Chaos isn't a good thing. All it's ever brought to Equestria is bad news" Sweetie Belle stated, she looked pretty upset about this

"Why? It's just me with a mark on my flank. Just because it's chaos doesn't make me a bad guy. It just means things can happen that are out of the ordinary....at least when it comes to me."

And that, out of the five of them made Scootaloo think. And then she smiled as she reached into the pocket of her costume and pulled out her cardboard wings. "Hey, I get it. It's like my wings. These came from chaos magic too, right Anon?"

You nod. "Yeah, see. Good stuff can happen from chaos."

"Well, if chaos can make these cool wings and get me personal lessons from Rainbow Dash. Then I think Anon's Cutie Mark is pretty cool." Scootaloo nods, smiles, and even hangs her right front leg around you to reassure her friends that she's perfectly ok with it.

The expression on Diamond Tiara's face was of her holding back her jealousy of Scootaloo touching you the way she is. Geez, that crush she has on you is unwavering. You really wished she was more mature about it, like Applebloom. Applebloom at least understood that there was no reason to be jealous. The only time she seems to react is if some other mare or filly even makes a joke about being with you. But there's going to be a problem if she sees how obvious Diamond is being.

"I agree with Scootaloo" Diamond Tiara says as she walks up beside you to also put her leg around you from the other side, subtly pushing away Scootaloo's leg. "I'm cool with it too"

Scootaloo didn't seem to mind her leg being moved away. Diamond didn't do it in a harsh or forceful fashion. just a gentle nudge.

"Well...yeah, ah guess you're both right. Anon hasn't done anything really bad. So ahm ok with it too. Not like we could just change his Cutie Mark anyway" Applebloom nodded to agree, though, you were sure you could see a hint of jealousy in her too from Diamond Tiara's advance on you. But she was doing a good job of hiding it.

"Well, if everypony else if fine with it. Then I'm fine with it." Sweetie Belle just goes along with the group "Just as long as Anon doesn't start acting like his dad."

"...I dunno...I mean, I remember Anon getting pretty mean when he wants to be. What if he just grows up to be as bad as Discord." Silver Spoon looked pretty worried about your Cutie Mark. She had never known a pony to have a Cutie Mark like that. She may be young, but she felt she knew bad news when she saw it.

"You mean when he said all that stuff and got a little crazy? Ahh come on Silver Spoon, the reason Anon got all ornery like that was because you and Diamond Tiara was picking on us. Ya can't fault him for that"

Diamond Tiara actually felt bad about that, hearing that, it reminded her of how she used to be. She let's you go and looks up to the group. "Yeah....I'm really sorry about that still...I jus-"

"Ahh, ya don't need to apologize about that Diamond Tiara. We know, and we're all friends now so it ain't a big deal anymore." Applebloom reassured her with a smile.

"Still, nopony gets a cutie mark like that without a reason. I mean, don't you girls remember when he exploded at school? We still don't know the full story on that." Silver Spoon said, feeling suspicious over the whole thing.

Scootaloo was getting more impatient as time went on "Coooome on, Twilight already explained it. It was his dad that did it. Nothing to do with Anon. What more do you need to know? If we knew the full story our minds might explode trying to figure out why Discord did it....ahrm...no offense to your Dad, Anon. But he is sorta nuts. But anyways, can we just go already? We're gonna miss EVERYTHING"

"Well...just because Princess Twilight said-" And, like she had done to you, Diamond interrupts Silver Spoon

"Silver Spoon! Are you going to question A PRINCESS?! REALLY?! Are you really accusing the Princess of hiding the facts?" Diamond Tiara didn't want to hear any more of this. She didn't want to hear Silver Spoon talking bad about you anymore.

"Well..umm...no...I...was just.....ummmm...no...I" Silver Spoon sighed, and gave up "No..I guess you're right. Princess Twilight would never lie to us about something like that."

"No...she wouldn't" Diamond Tiara said in an awkwardly serious way.


Geez....you just wanted to go Nightmare Nighting or whatever they called it already. This was getting uncomfortable.

"Well, that's that. We're all good with Anon's amazing Cutie Mark, right?" Diamond asked.

The rest nod, Silver Spoon nodding half halfheartedly. You actually felt a little sorry for her. She was half right, but you weren't no bad guy. You knew you weren't...even if you were having a little fun before getting here.

"Good...Now come on Anon, get in costume so we can go already!" Diamond Tiara hurried you along

"Alright alright, hey Scootaloo, Sweetie Belle...check this out!" You use your horn to change back into pony Big Boss. Down to the missing eye. Though, you weren't going to lift the eye patch. As fun as it would be, you didn't want to be purposely mean in front of Silver Spoon. She seemed a little jumpy.

"Woooooooooah, that's so cool! You're like some super soldier or something!" Scootaloo was amazed by your costume and the magic. "That's what it's supposed to be, right?"

You nod. "Sorta, it's a little more than that actually. But you're basically right" You look to Sweetie Belle. "what do you think Sweetie Belle?"

Sweetie Belle rubbed her chin and wondered...then she moved up to you. Her face in near range of yours. huh...you never realized how cute and marshmellowy she really looked....oohhh. "I-is something wrong?"

"no...just...curious..." Sweetie Belle moves her hoof closer to your face. Was she going to touch your older looking skin and coat?

...wait..WAIT! "Sweetie Belle, h-...ahhh...geez"

Too late, she lifts your eye patch, showing off your missing eye. Why...why the fuck did you remove your eye again?

Scootaloo jumps back in suprise "A-ANON!"

Diamond Tiara wobbles just from the sight of it. she can't say words.

Applebloom feels sick to her stomach "..n-not again..."

Silver Spoon was gagged "WHY?! WHY WOULD YOU GOUGE YOUR EYE OUT FOR A COSTUME?! NO WONDER YOU GOT THAT CUTIE MARK"

But Sweetie Belle, she just shrugged and lowered your eye patch. "That's pretty neat Anon, you can put your eye back with your magic right?"

Woah, she wasn't phased. Weird. usually in the show she'd be phased the same as the rest of the CMC. "Yeah....why aren't you freaking out?"

Sweetie Belle shrugged "I guess it's because I already know to expect the unexpected from you. And you did say that horn let's you do anything you want. If it's the same as Discord, then that means you can do anything he can. The only real difference is that'd you'd never do anything mean to us for fun. You're not like that. It's not like it's your Dad where anything could happen.....no offense"

"None taken...thanks for not freaking out."

"Hey..I didn't freak out either..I just didn't want anypony to feel stupid" Diamond Tiara couldn't even say that with confidence. She was obviously freaked out by it.

"Oh come on, you were freaked out like the rest of us." Scootaloo calls Diamond's bullshit.

"Pfft, no. " Diamond Tiara rolled her eyes, and looked at Scootaloo with peeved anger. She knew she was called out. She just refused to admit it.

"Hey Girls, come on now. Let's not fight. Ok?" You didn't need that.

"Anon's right, let's not fight.....even though I wasn't freaked out" Diamond Tiara tries to get the last word.

"No..I'm good too....even though she totally was" Scootaloo states

"....I wasn't"

...You were"

"I WASN'T!" Diamond Tiara looked directly at Scootaloo, getting angrier by the second.

"YOU WERE!" Scootaloo was doing the same.

"HEEEEYYY! Let's just say...nobody was and....let's just go. Ok?" Please, PLEASE. You really didn't need this.

Applebloom, also noticing the discord among them. Agreed. "Yeah, let's not fight girls. We're all friends remember?"

They both mumble to each other.

"yeah..."

"right.."

They both got so aggravated over something so simple. Geez, children...will be children… well..as such. there's only one way to make sure things would be ok. "Ok, now can you both apologize to each other?"

"What?! I'm not apologizing to her! She's the one who teased me!" Diamond Tiara was not going to apologize when she felt she was right..even though she wasn't.

"That's because you were lying." Scootaloo said.

...Joy. "Look, please. for me? Will you both apologize?"

You try to sound the most sincere as possible. Diamond Tiara budged almost immediately from hearing your words in such a tone, and seeing your face. Which you really did show you wanted peace among them.

Though..you were doing it on purpose as well. Hoping she'd bend.

"....mnnn...ok....maybe I was freaked out a little...I'm....I'm sorry Scootaloo..." She gruffed a little, but it was enough humility for you.

"Mnnn, sorry for being mean about it" Scootaloo probably felt she was in the right. You didn't care. You didn't need them biting each other's head off.

"Ok...we all good?"

They both nod.

"Ok cool, so...how about we go get some candy and you girls show me how this Nightmare Night thing works."

"Oh, that's super easy Anon. you'll get the hang of it real easy. Just follow our lead. Now let's get goin'!" Applebloom said, excited to finally get moving.

"Well, now that we're finally going. I can finally put these on!" Scootaloo put on the cardboard wings, as they turned into her magical wings. "Ahh yeah! been waiting to pop in these bad boys all night. Now I'm like a real wonderbolt!"

You giggled a little, that was cute.

With that, you all started your romp through the town, on this night, Nightmare Night.

"So Anon, I noticed you got a uniform for a costume too. What are you supposed to be anyway?" Scootaloo asked as she hovered over you.

"Oh, it's probably something you never heard of. But I'm part of this organization called FOXHOUND. A soldier secret agent basically, My codename being Big Boss"

"Big Boss? Anon, I thought we agreed that your name was Omnipotent Soldier." Diamond Tiara reminded you.

You shake your head however. "Nooooo, you said that would be my name. But the actual name is Big Boss. I'm not going to change my name just because you said so."

"What?! But Omnipotent Soldier sounds so much better than Big Boss. Who agrees with me?" Diamond Tiara looked around at the rest of the group, looking for yeses.

"Ah...actually agree with Diamond Tiara." Applebloom said "Omnipotent Soldier does fit better."

Silver Spoon nods "I also have to agree. Big Boss doesn't sound like a soldier's name to me."

....Ohhhh...come on. Ok that tears it. "Ok, show of hooves. who thinks Omnipotent Soldier is a better name than Big Boss"

Applebloom,DT,SS, and...even Sweetie Belle raises her hoof. "...oh come on Sweetie Belle. You too?"

Sweetie Belle nods "Yeah, I mean. When is a soldier a boss? The name Big Boss sounds just...weird."

"Well...I didn't raise my hoof" Scootaloo says, a little sheepishly since she was the only one out of the five not to raise her hoof.

You look up at the hovering pegasus. And smile, finally. One of them gets it. "Thank you Scootaloo, at least one of you seems to understand."

"Yeah, I mean. Big Boss is a pretty cool name. It means you're big time, and a boss. How is that a bad name?" Scootaloo said to reinforce her vote.

"Really Scootaloo? You don't think the name sounds weird? I've read mobsters from the cities have that kind of name. But I've never heard of any soldier or even a super hero named Big Boss before." Sweetie Belle said to her friend, to inform her of the logic behind her vote.

"...Oohhhhhh......ok, I get it now. I wasn't thinking if it belonged to anything else. Well, in that case. Big Boss does sound kinda dumb for a soldier." Scootaloo raises her hoof "I change my vote!"

..............dammit.

"Ok, so we're ALL agreed then. Anon, from now on, for the rest of the night. You are Omnipotent Soldier! And seeing as I am the princess of the group. I task you of protecting us from any harm."

"Hey! What about me! I'm a wonderbolt!" Scootaloo called out, feeling she could also do the job.

"Right, yes, you can protect us too. Just don't get in Anon's way" Diamond Tiara said halfheartedly.

"Yeah, Wonderbolt Scootaloo is a go!" Scootaloo started to zip around in the air, scouting out a few feet.

.........dammit....

Whatever....fine...you didn't expect children to understand....then again. Only Bonbon seemed to understand.

"Well, ah guess we should also be showin' Anon how to ask for candy. Anon, ya know what to say right?" Applebloom asked.

"Huh?..oh..no no, umm. I don't know. What is it again?"

"It's "Nightmare Night, what a fright, give us something sweet to bite!". Really easy to remember, And don't forget to hold out your saddle bag so they can put in candy." Applebloom reminded you. As if you really needed to be reminded. It was basically pony halloween...but not shitty like human halloween had become.

Still no sign of the Mane six either. Not a single one of them. You wondered if anything did indeed happened.

"Well, here's our first stop. Let's go!" Scootaloo said, eager for some candy. She immediately flies to the door.

"Woah Woah, hey. Wait for us! Just because you have wings doesn't mean to go zipping everywhere without us. We're a team remember?" Sweetie Belle called out.

Scootaloo landed, and shrugged. "Eh, it's not like I was gonna knock. Come on, these things are on a timer. I wanna make em last as long as possible"

Yeah, Scootaloo would be anxious about that. You hoped she remembered what you told her about practicing. You wondered if it'd be a good idea to extend the limit. You knew you shouldn't make it unlimited. If you did, she'd never take them off.

The rest of you catch up, and everyone gets into position. Holding their saddlebags out and making the cutest faces they could. You follow suit, but you couldn't exactly do cute in your current state. So you just tried a more badass face of bravado.

Applebloom knocks on the door, and you all wait.

The door soon opens. Amethyst Star is the pony behind it. She had a cute black witch's hat and a little cape with a broach in the front.

That was all your cues. You all hold out your bags and speak. "Nightmare Night!~ What a Fright~! Give us something sweet to bite!~"

"Well hello there. Aren't you all...." Amethyst gets a look at you. Then quickly glances at the rest of the group, then back at you. She's seen these fillies before. And she knew you couldn't be the father to any of them. ".......uhhh. You're all children right?"

"Ummm, do you mean literally or our costumes? Because I'm a very sophisticated debutante of the...ummmm....Belle Estate" Sweetie Belle said, trying her best to act dignified and regal sounding.

"And I'm a wonderbolt! The best Wonderbolt Ever!" Scootaloo added.

"And I'm a Princess" Said Diamond Tiara

"I'm the princess's lady in waiting!" Silver Spoon added.

"ahm a platypus!" Added Applebloom

Then Amethyst looked at you. You then realized what she meant. Luckily, the only thing that your magic didn't affect was your voice. So, there should be no issue.

"And I'm Big Boss! Member of FOXHOUND!" You said in a cute and cheerful manner.

It took Amethyst a moment to think. There was no denying that voice. And given someone like you wouldn't just announce themselves as some secret group member she's never heard about....nah, there was no way you were an adult. So, she just tried to play off her suspicions as just trying to figure out your costumes. "Well...all your costumes are very good. I've never seen costumes that looked that great before. And for that, I'm sure you all want some extra candy to compensate." Using her magic. She hovered over a plastic pony skull, it's top part of the head cut off, and filled with an assortment of candy.

You all hold out your bags for the candy. Hell, you were even excited. Candy is candy. It always tastes great.

"Here you go!" She handed each of you seven pieces of candy. She was still mainly focused on you. If that was really a costume. It was reaaaallllyyy good. That's what she thought anyway.

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