• Published 21st Oct 2017
  • 10,515 Views, 2,803 Comments

Dadonequus Discord (Book 1) - CrazedLaughter



Discord makes a deal with an anonymous human. The human gets to live a good life in Equestria. And Discord? he gets to have a son of his own. Of course, his only reason is to impress Fluttershy and annoy Twilight.

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Chapter 228

Author's Note:

Tonight!
Chrysalis is smug
An object is tied
And Anon is probably behind a low wall

"Yeah...no, we're not doing that. Chrysalis, I have to set things right. So what I want you to do is tell Twilight that Discord has accepted you as family. And then tell her you're going to see your new home. I'm going to school to get everything sorted out with Applebloom. That's the plan."

"That's a stupid plan. You've already proven that you can't handle the filly and now both our necks are on the line. How about you just let me handle this. I'm sure I can find a way to make everything right for us." Chrysalis was pretty serious about this. She really didn't expect this to happen.

You shake your head. Nope, it was your way or the highway. "We're doing things my way. And for me to be able to do what I do, I need you gone for the day. Just be glad it'll be for one day, because I'm telling you Chrysalis. You're on thin ice"

".....You know, when I took up the task of reforming you. It wasn't meant for you to just start giving me commands like that. What makes you think I should listen to you?" Chrysalis asks, waiting for a good ass reason.

You point to the horn around your neck. "Because if you don't listen to me. I'll force you to listen to me....Isn't this what you wanted? Well, I've got my horn back. And I'm not afraid to use it. You want to have your own definition of friendship? Fine, we'll play by those rules then. And this horn is the consequence of breaking such rules....are we clear? Bugbutt?"

Chrysalis was about to say something. She found that actually insulting. But, she could tell by the glint of your eye that you were being serious. More serious than she's ever seen you before. Part of her actually liked it, it showed you were willing to be ruthless. But...she didn't want to suffer your wrath either. She had no clue what a human was capable of with chaos magic. But she did chuckle "Interesting. Well, I have to admit Anon. I almost thought you were a lost cause. But here you are, reinforcing your demands."
She stepped closer to you, with caution. She noticed your serious face was never breaking, not once. "Anon...I only have one request before I go"

You look up at her as she draws near, putting your hoof to your horn in case she tries anything. "...What is it?"

Chrysalis giggles cutely "Well, when you have a free night. I'd like to see something else from the human world. Anything will do as long as it's to my liking....You can do that for me...can't you?" She was giving you those soft bedroom eyes she likes to do. And in that body...u-unf.

You were blushing, but you never broke your serious stare. "..I'll think about it."

Chrysalis leans her head down and gives you a soft lick on the cheek, giving you goosebumps as you blush harder and step back.

"Will you stop fucking with me like that! Sheesh! That's not going to help my decision you know!"

Chrysalis giggles a more sultry little giggle this time "So you say..." She can feel your desire rising "Well, either way. You have the upper hoof. Doesn't it feel good to be on top?"

You were too tired, your senses from lack of sleep was starting to get to you now that the excitement was over...you almost had the desire of just cuddling into Chrysalis and going to sleep...but that was just a thought after all. "I....don't really care at the moment...."

Chrysalis could tell at this point, your speech was slowing and you were being very groggy. "Poor little Anon, you must have not gotten any sleep due to my children’s mistake. Well then, I only have one more thing to say to you. I want you to contemplate on your victory, and I want you to grow."

......That sounded odd. "That's it?"

Chrysalis nods. "That's it...what, did you expect me to take advantage of you being soooooo tired to try to seduce you into something? I could try. But without my full power, it wouldn't amount to much. Just think of my words as advice"

"Well...I guess..thanks..but that still doesn't mean I'll lighten up on you yet. You have to show me you're willing to do better"

"I suppose that depends on what constitutes as better. But...We'll have to see."

Chrysalis was already plotting. But there was something nagging at her. It wasn't a sense of "goodness". But it was the fact that her time with you always strengthened the fact that she would in fact welcome you into her hive. She wanted you to just give in. Maybe it was the fact that she felt that proper use of the horn could gain her Equestria and therefore it wouldn't take much after to force you into her side. She even danced the thought of how lenient she'd be if you denied her AFTER she took over. Even when you were pissing her off, the fact that you weren't a softie or stereotypical hard head kept her from outright hating you.Her only real obstacle in her way, in her thoughts anyway, was Discord himself. He could easily undo anything she does. And that alone put a wrench in all her plans. She had to find a subtle way to beat him....but that would be for another time.

"In anycase...There's not much to gain just prattling on. So let's just get this over with. I want to hear what excuse my little darlings....ohhh" Chrysalis puts her hoof to her forehead, realizing she forgot something. "Anon, actually..I have one more favor."

"Chrysalis..."

"it's actually important, I haven't heard from the Captain since I gave him some orders last night. If you happen to see him, can you send him home?...Also...I'll be needing my map, you have it right?"

..Oh sheesh..even you forgot about the goddamn mongrel. "...Ok, I'll see if I can spot him" You say as you pull out a map for Chrysalis. "..But what do you mean by orders?"

"I ordered him to snoop around the castle and see if he could gather any information that might be useful"

....WHAT?! "YOU PROMISED! YOU PROMISED YOU WOULDN'T DO ANY PLOTTING OR SCHEMING!"

Chrysalis shrugs. "And I didn't, I merely gave the Captain an order. What he does and what he reports to me determines what I do AFTERWARDS. I fulfilled my end of the promise quite well I think."

You groan, goddammit. She wasn't trustworthy at all. You raise your hoof to say something to her, to tell her off, but you couldn't think of anything to say. She wasn't going to listen. And until you have a real reason to either blast her or seal her yourself with the horn. You had nothing.

She gently puts her hoof upon yours and gently puts it down. "I know it sucks that I can find ways around a promise, but unless you're going to use your horn on me. You have nothing"

"....You're really pushing it Chrysalis..."

"Think of it as building up your fortitude and patience. If you're going to handle your messes, you'll need to think with a clearer head." Chrysalis chuckles "Oh look, another piece of advice for you....I suppose the role as your older sister is actually beginning to rub off"

"Yeah yeah..don't get cute..." ...Though...even if she was messing with you...that actually was pretty sound advice. and something you needed. "Ok, I'll look for the captain when I have the time. For now, let's just get you "settled"..ok?"

"Ok...my sweet little brother" Chrysalis chuckles at you.

...ugh...Discord...this was a mistake..it had to be.

You did..however..made sure Chrysalis went back home. She got a little agitated that you had to watch her return home. But you stood your ground once more.

"Can't even trust me to return home on my own?" She said, annoyed with you.

"Considering I have to find your captain because you had to be dishonest as fuck.....yes" You narrow your eyes at her...mostly because you could feel your mind numbing from lack of sleep.

"I wasn't dishonest" She corrects you "I was just doing things in another way. I didn't want to break that promise Anon...it'd be wrong"

....Erghhh.... "..Yeah...ok..."

"So untrusting...I hope I can trust you in finding my little captain" She was serious about that.

"I'll do my best, but no guarantees. He can be anywhere."

"It shouldn't be hard, considering his own fascination with you. I'm sure he won't be able to rests popping up sooner or later...take care Anon."

And with that....she left back to the cutie map room....you put your hoof to your forehead to focus. God...really, you thought it'd be like how Discord turned. Easy as long as you make her realize how wrong she lived her life. The problem was that it wasn't that easy, she genuinely enjoyed everything that she does and was never actually lonely enough to do a quick heel turn on her feelings. You really hoped this was all worth it.

You lift up your horn and look at it. At least you had your horn back. So if anything went wrong. You could fix it.

You take a few breaths. And step out the door, heading back to the cutie map room. You can already see Nymous leaving as Twilight waves goodbye to her.

"....She's so excited she didn't even wait for Anon" Twilight giggled.

"Well, sounds like she really hasn't had a good home in awhile. Discord might be preeetttyyyy crazy, but hey. Anon seems cool with it, it should be fine" Spike says as he also waves goodbye.

"I believe that too Spike, In fact! I have no doubt!....well..maybe a little" Twilight lets out another cheerful giggle.

You step forward and greet them. "Heya, So...sounds like you two are totally fine with my sister's arrangements."

Twilight turns to you, smiles, then nods. "Mhmmm, I assume the talk between you all was probably about Discord. And if Princess Celestia is ok with it. Then, well..you know. Besides, there's nothing wrong with your sister living with you from your perspective, right?" Boy, did she assume wrong.

You nod. "Right, so uhhh..Twilight. Before I go..because you know, school. I actually won a tournament yesterday and-"

"Oh, the Super Alicorn Blaster II championships!" Spike cuts you off, "Yeah, I already let Twilight know that was pretty slick playing Anon, hard to believe you never touched the game once before"

He knew? If he knew that much. He had to have been somewhere in the crowd. "You were there Spike?"

Spike nods. "Oh yeah! You'd think I'd miss that? I was the last to apply. I guess you didn't notice me huh? You looked pretty determined during that final fight with Tirek. It was legendary!.....You don't mind if I get a few games in when they get here do ya?"

"Ahrm" Twilight cleared her throat to cut in "You mean play within reason, right Spike? I don't want you playing all day trying to do something silly like....It's got a scoring method right?" Seems Twilight wasn't exactly sure on the content of video games in general.

Spike nods "Yeah"

"Then I don't want you getting addicted in trying to beat Anon's score. Ok?"

"Eh.." Spike throws his claw out in a "nothing to worry about" way. "It's no problem Twilight, I have this."

"I hope so...so Anon" Twilight's horn glows as she slides over to you a wrapped bag. "I packed up the pancakes for you in case you wanted some for later. You have a good day at school alright? And I hope you manage to make some new friends too! Every day is always a new possibility for friendship!"

Eghhh...You kinda wished she didn't press on about friendship like that. Especially with what was going on now. "I understand. Thanks Twilight...sees ya when I sees ya! And uhhh...yeah..Bowling tomorrow Spike, for sure!"

You left the castle with your goodbyes after that. You tried catching up with Chrysalis, but when you stepped out, you could already see her jumping into a puddle of some sort....Good...thank god.

And with that, you made your way to school. Tired, and your mind muddled with current events. How the hell were you even going to handle the Captain? The guy wanted you dead after all.

You still had plenty of time however. You barely saw any foals going to class. So you knew you were still early.. Maybe you should find a spot to relax and wait to cross Applebloom's path?

But, as you walk closer and closer to the school. You hear a familiar apple filly's voice call out to you. Hearing her voice, it somehow filled you with dread rather than relief. Even if you did want to talk to her. a part of you was still worried that everything might be over at this point.

"Anon! Heya Anon! Wait up!"

You stop, and slowly turn to her....here we go. "Applebloom...whats up?...ummm" You looked really unsure, contrast to the odd fact that she looked like the same ole Applebloom. When she caught up to you however, her face became a little more somber.

"Ummm...not much....just been doin' a lot of thinkin' about last night...ahm actually really glad to see you this early..Ah had this feeling you'd be up kinda early..." She then noticed your face. "...But ah thought you mighta gotten some sleep first...Are ya ok?"

She was asking if you were ok.....oh thank god. It meant she still cared. "Y-yeah....I ended up not getting any sleep."

"....It's because you were scared that'd ah tell mah sister....right?"

....

You nod. "Y-yeah...I thought you just ended up hating me right then and there....things got pretty crazy last night..I'm actually surprised I haven't been banished yet"

"..Well...ya don't have to worry. Ah didn't tell mah sister or mah brother or even Granny Smith. I kinda just thought about it. And boy, did I put in a lot of thought. And ah realized, if you were really a bad guy...you probably wouldn't have let me go. Yah did say Princess Celestia herself knows about this, right?"

You nod. "She does...and trust me, she doesn't like it either. If I screw up...well...I don't know what's going to happen."

Applebloom nods, understanding..or at least understanding in the capacity of her own mind. "That's a lot of weight on your shoulders, huh Anon?....Ah didn't know you were handling somepony as dangerous as that mean ole' Changeling Queen. Ah never woulda guessed really...It's tough, huh?"

You nod. "...You have no idea...." You were feeling relieved, it seems she was keeping the secret afterall.

But then she started to step away, heading towards an alley "...Ah think ah might...Anon..do ya mind taking a detour for just a second?"

...A detour? That was odd. "...Uhhh...." You wanted to ask why. But you didn't know how volatile the situation could be. So you just agree and follow her. "Sure...."

Now something was suspicious. Applebloom just being ok with everything? Leading you down an alley? That usually means something was amiss....you almost felt like you had to be on your guard...but dammit...you were sooooooo tired.

......Could she even be...the captain?..Was it a trap? If it was..it was a pretty convincing Applebloom. You'd never be able to tell the difference

She leads you down a narrow alley that had a couple of tall trash cans out. You and her were alone as she stood by the trashcans and turned to face you...what was going on? "...So uhhm...What's up?"

Applebloom sighs. "Anon, like ah said. Ah thought a lot about it. And after talking it out with the girls. We kinda realized you may have bitten off more than you can chew"

...Well that sprung you awake. THE GIRLS?! "W-what?! I thought you said you didn't tell anypony.."

"Ah said ah didn't tell mah family. But Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle are mah closest friends. And we all agreed that you're gonna need our help if you're gonna reform that Queen."

OHHHHHHHHH. "Applebloom....Y-you can't just...I..I don't need any help. I have to do this on my own."

"See, told you he'd say something like that. Still high and mighty, still thinking he can do things on his own. Anon, why do you have to be so dumb sometimes?" A voice says from behind the trash can.

"Yeah, I don't even think Rainbow Dash could do something like this on her own. And if she can't do it. You definitely can't. Not by yourself anyway" Said another voice.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH...

Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo came out from behind the trash can. Scootaloo looking like she's rarin to go. Sweetie Belle just raising an eyebrow at you.

...Ohh good lordie...

You put your hoof to your face and shake your head. ".....ohhhh my...geez....Are you all serious? Do you realize how bad this is?"

"It's not that bad Anon, Applebloom told us everything. If she has no way to hurt us then we should be able to do just fine" Sweetie Belle says in a matter of factly kind of way.

"Yeah, we already know she's capable of fooling a lot of ponies. That's why you need us to help. So she can't get away with anything under our muzzles. Come on Anon, you couldn't even handle that puppy....changeling..thing she's got" Scootaloo said.

"Girls, you have NO idea what she's capable of. She is able to make lives miserable even without her powers. As for her captain, I didn't even know he was a puppy at the time. And he was pretty fast for one too. The only pony I saw trying to really help was Applebloom. And I had to dive in to save her from that bite."

Applebloom blushes a little. Since she knows now that you genuinely dove in to save her. "Well, that's the thing Anon...you're actually really wrong about that"

"Super really wrong." Sweetie Belle added. "There you go again thinking we can't do anything because we’re girls or too young or something"

"Because that's exactly it on both counts! You can't all do this! Chrysalis will make ALL your lives a living nightmare once she knows that you ALL know. Look!" You point to your horn. "This is the only thing I have to make sure she doesn't go too far, and I can only use it once per day! You three cannot handle yourselves on your own! Just drop it, forget you know anything, and let me handle it. Because there’s NO way that you three can handle this. What made you even think you could?!"

"Wow Sweetie Belle, you were right. He is reacting like you said he would." Scootaloo remarked

Applebloom didn't seem as astounded, she actually felt bad that it seemed you thought so little of them.

"I know, So Anon. What if we can prove we can handle ourselves. Would you have anything to say then?" Sweetie Belle asks with a sly smile.

As if they could. "Sure why not? If you three can prove to me right now that you can handle it. Then I'll back off. But you better have something good. I mean so good, I won't be able to say anything about it....good luck with that. Because as soon as you're done, the three of you are going to forget about it. And Applebloom?..." You sigh. "Just..stay away from Chrysalis, ok?"

But before anything could be said by Applebloom. Sweetie Belle speaks up. "Accepted! So girls, you all ready?"

Applebloom nodded "Ready"

Scootaloo answered in a more excited fashion. "READY!"

Ready?...Ready for what...just to fail to explain? Oh lord. they were getting hyped for nothing.

Sweetie Belle went next to one of the trash cans and kicked it over to its side, the lid popped off, and out of the trash can, wrapped up tight and gagged was a small puppy. It looked like the fall had sprung him to life, because his eyes went wide and he started struggling the moment he landed on the ground.

Your eyes went wide.....No...NOOOOO...That's impossible! THATS JUST IMPOSSIBLE! ".......a-ah...i-is that.ah...um...ack"

"Well, since he can talk. He's gotta be that captain Applebloom told us about. It is the same puppy that attacked after all" Sweetie Belle explained.

"He is, it's a good thing mah sister taught me how to lasso and hogtie things. Or he may have gotten away" Applebloom notes.

"Hey Anon...ya got a retort yet? We're waaaiiitttiinngg" Scootaloo giggled. "Pretty good huh? We spotted him standing by a window doing something weird with his mouth. So we snuck up on him, wrestled him down, knocked him out, and tied him up and threw him in the trashcan. It was a good thing Applebloom was right about you being up early. Or he may have woken up while we were at school and who knows what would happen then"

This wasn't good… No it was not at all. You just looked wide eyed at the captain, then at the crusaders, who looked pretty proud of themselves.

"So Anon, what do you say now?" Sweetie Belle says, looking pretty smug

".....So, what do you plan to do with him then?" You ask, wondering exactly how far they thought ahead.

".......ummmmm" Sweetie Belle was at a loss

"...That's right...what did we plan to do with him?" Scootaloo asks

"...Ah dunno...Well, shouldn't we let Anon decide then? He does live with him" Applebloom concludes.

Ugh...how annoying. "Girls, did you not think making Chrysalis's captain angry would make things even worse? Once he tells her what happens,...ugh, Come on!" You start to get pretty angry. "You should have just left him alone! You're all just making things worse for yourselves!"

All three of them wince. They didn't think you'd react like that. Now they started to have doubt in themselves, even Sweetie Belle looked a little shaken.

"Well..erm...can't you just talk to him?" Scootaloo asks, tapping her hooves together sheepishly.

"Or maybe use your horn to threaten him? Or...Well...how bad could it really be?" Sweetie Belle says, a little shaken at the possibilities that might be.

"Just watch..." You look down at the captain. You were going to show the girls how unreasonable he was. You walk over to the captain and carefully ungag him before preparing yourself for his wrath. But there wasn't any...

He immediately yells out in fright instead. "Anon, Save me! I'm bringing shame to the queen! I have to report back to her!"

You raise an eyebrow at him, confused. "Well, that's a little different than what I expected. I thought you were going to try to destroy me outright"

The Captain stops struggling and looks up at you with cute puppy dog eyes "...But I do want to destroy you...just not right now, I need your help so I don't shame the queen. She's expecting a report from me." He wasn't speaking in a frantic way, he was actually scared, nearly begging.

"Anon, maybe we should ask him what he needs to report, we might be able to use that information for somethin'. Ah dunno, maybe use it against Chrysalis?" Applebloom was trying to turn things to the team's favor.

That did sound like a good idea. But you were more curious as to what this "report" was. "Uhm...Captain, what exactly do you have to report?"

"Oh...I can't say in front of them. The queen doesn't consider them part of the hive or a friend. I can tell you though. But it has to be in private" He says, a dimwitted stare on his face

Huh...he was actually being...agreeable. You wondered something. "Well, these are my friends...soo uhh..wouldn't the friends of the queen's friend count enough to hear what this report is?"

The Captain stopped to think ".....Huh.....I guess that makes sense."

...Very agreeable. "...Ok..so uhh...What's the report? Does it have to do with Twilight's castle?"

The Captain nods "Mhmm, as for the report itself?...there's nothing to report...I couldn't find anything useful that my queen can use."

So...he didn't find anything useful? But wouldn't that mean..... "Isn't that considered failure?"

The Captain winced "D-don't say it like that...maybe she won't see it that way...it was my first real big mission as captain and......OH NO YOU'RE RIGHT!" The Captain started to cry "I SHAMED THE QUEEN! I FAILED! I FAILED...ONGH....I..I don't deserve to exist anymore..." He was shaking, shivering, and crying. He looked like he wanted to die.

Holy crap, he was taking it hard. You doubt even the Ex-captain would take it that hard. He'd just take his lumps and try again like he always has.

"Awwww...poor little guy..." Applebloom said as she stepped towards the captain. "Ah don't think it's that bad"

Wut? "Uhhhh..Applebloom, did you not hear that he wants to destroy me? I wouldn't feel bad for him"

"Well ah do, look at him Anon. There's tears comin' from his eyes. He just wanted to do good by his queen. It's like he's a little foal himself." Applebloom starts to gently pet the captain, even letting him go from his bindings.

"Applebloom..w-what are you..APPLEBLOOM!" You yell, afraid the captain may attack her.

All of you gasp when you all realize she had untied him. But the Captain doesn't make any sudden movements. He just scooches towards Applebloom and enters her embrace as he starts to cry.

"There there little fella, Ahm sure it'll be ok" Applebloom tried to perk up the captain, but he wouldn't stop crying.

"It won't..It won't! She trusted me, she made me captain because she saw me as the best of the best and I couldn't even find anything of use to her.....All I can do now to restore her honor is destroy Anon...But now I don't think I can"

Applebloom hugs him close as the rest of you just look on in surprise and wonderment. "Is it because ya realized he wants to be a friend? And you wanna be his?"

The Captain nuzzles into her chest and whines "No...because he has that horn."

...That was about as much as you expected."Come on Applebloom, he's just trying to tug at your heartstrings...and he can't even do that right"

"Ah don't think so Anon, ah think he's really worried." Applebloom gives him a gentle hug. "Hey, ah know you wanna destroy Anon and all. But ah don't think you need to do that.And ah think you should just be honest with yer queen."

"But...she'll be so mad..." The Captain says in a scared little voice.

"Even if she does get mad, ah don't think she's gonna destroy ya. She'll probably just give you a stern talking to. And then you'll just have to do better next time. Come on, ya don't have to cry anymore. Ya don't have to worry, if you want some friends who ain't gonna judge ya, well...me and the girls wouldn't mind being your friend" Applebloom looks to Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo. "Right girls?"

..Ooookk...This was going on for too long. "Girls..listen, I know that-"

"Sure!" Sweetie Belle says in a squeaky voice

"Yeah, I don't really see how that's bad. He doesn't seem like a bad guy" Scootaloo adds.

"There see? Do you want to be our friends?" Applebloom asks.

".....You'd be friends with me? Even though I want to see all ponykind enslaved by my queen?" The puppy changeling looks up to Applebloom with sad and pathetic eyes.

"Sure.....just uhhh...just don't focus on that enslaving stuff around us, alright? Just be nice to us and we'll be nice to you." Applebloom gently scratches his neck with her hoof.

Oh come on..that wasn't going to work.

...Or maybe it was, the captain was happily wagging his tail as he let Applebloom pet him.

"Awww, he's so cute!" Sweetie Belle says "I want a turn petting him!"

"Yeah, me too!" Scootaloo states.......

You gotta be kidding... "So that's it then? We're just going to ignore the fact that this is probably a trick. Or that he still wants to destroy me?"

"Awww...you don't wanna destroy Anon, do you?" Sweetie Belle gently rubs the captains tummy.

"...Well.....I do...it would avenge my queen's honor" The Captain said meekly as he twitched from the belly rub

It made Scootaloo think. She didn't personally know a lot about changeling honor. But she knew what constituted as glory. She would use that to keep you safe from any random attack from the Captain."Hey, I got an idea. If you have to destroy Anon. You have to do it in a duel. That way, when you take him down. It'll be in a fair fight. If you do it that way, it'll be a lot more glorious and honorable than just randomly taking him out in his sleep or something. Does that sound ok?"

SCOOTALOO! "Hold on! Are you seriously suggesting -"

Scootaloo puts her hoof to her mouth and goes "shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!"

"No seriously! What kind of-" Was she insane?!

"Anon! Shh! We're talking with our new friend. Stop being a foal and wait your turn!" Sweetie Belle shushes you "If you're not going to say anything nice, then don't say anything at all"

......You started to shake..it was taking all your patience not to explode on them.

"...I-I guess that's a better idea..." The Captain looks to you with sad eyes, oblivious to your anger. "...Do you think that's a good idea Anon, fighting when we're both ready? To the death?"

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