• Published 21st Oct 2017
  • 10,263 Views, 2,758 Comments

Dadonequus Discord (Book 1) - CrazedLaughter

Discord makes a deal with an anonymous human. The human gets to live a good life in Equestria. And Discord? he gets to have a son of his own. Of course, his only reason is to impress Fluttershy and annoy Twilight.

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Chapter 12

The three of you turn. There they were. Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon at 6 o'clock.
These two...THESE TWO. These two were one of the reasons you even watched CMC episodes. You just wanted to see them get BTFO without recovery. But it never really happened..or worse. The CMC would even be lulled by them. You REAAALLLY REALLY HATED these two. You kept your cool however. If you just lost your shit now, then it'd seem awkward. Just… keep calm…

Diamond Tiara started to walk along the side as Applebloom and Sweetie Belle stopped.
"Whatyya want Diamond Tiara? Can't ya see we're busy?" Applebloom sneered, she wasn't at all pleased with their presence.

Diamond Tiara looked at your group then chuckled. "Oh nothing, I just noticed you're down a certain blank flank."

Silver Spoon walked along the other side, stopping next to you "Maybe she flew home… oh wait..."

They both started to laugh. You could already see Applebloom getting angry just from that remark. Sweetie Belle seemed to be surveying the situation. She just let Applebloom talk for now. "Ya take that back! Scootaloo is just elsewhere. That's all. Why can't ya'll just leave us alone?"

"Oh we would. I don't want to associate with you. But I noticed a new pony following you two around. A blank flank as well sadly, but that's because we think it's only from hanging around you two." Diamond remarked

Silver spoon nodded in agreeance "Yeah, we think he'd do much better if he was with us."

Sweetie Belle chimed in "Go away! We saw him first. Tell em Anon"

For once, You really wanted to join in, but you went into this cautiously. Now that you actually are encountering. these two for real… You needed to assess the situation. "H-hey now, I don't even know these two. I mean. Why is everypony being so hostile all of a sudden?"

"Hostile? Us? We were just noticing that you were new, that's all. You don't even have a cutie mark." Diamond Tiara said as she eyed your flank. her voice less sharp when speaking about you.

"So what, are ya gonna make fun of him too? Come on, let's just go back" Applebloom said. But Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon cut her off a she began to turn.

"Don't be hasty Applebloom, we didn't come here to cause trouble. We just thought it was funny. I mean, didn't you know? You can't get your mark just because you have a cutie with you."

Silver Spoon stepped behind Diamond Tiara and looked over to you "Yeah, He's better off with us. If he just sticks with you then he'll just be a big loser."

Cutie?..right. You didn't even need to question it. Even if it sounded Gary Stu-ish. Discord made sure to make your form cute. If only to lull Fluttershy even more into the whole "Father Son" dealio. Seemed it might cause some other effects as well. Still… even then… not these two bitches.

"Hey, they aren't losers. They are pretty cool! I mean Sweetie Belle and Applebloom are related to the Elements of Harmony. That seems pretty cool to me." Ha, that should do it. They had a big boner for Princess Twilight. and the rest were pretty much her council. Here comes the win baby, yeah!

Diamond Tiara giggled at you and then walked slowly, giving you a bedroom stare before gently rubbing under your muzzle gently with her hoof. "Awww, how adorable. They've fooled you into thinking that actually means something. But in fact it just means they are even bigger losers since they don't even have anywhere close to the talent their sisters have. Scootaloo at least doesn't have to live with that shame. Don't worry… Anon, was it? We can offer you so much more than these walking jokes."

You blushed for a mere moment before stepping back. You immediately felt disgusted with yourself. Not only had your words backfired. But you actually felt a nuzzling warmth from her touch.

Applebloom and Sweetie Belle stepped in front of you. Sweetie Belle spoke… venom in her voice. "Step off Diamond Tiara, he doesn't want to go with you."

"So you say. Why don't you let him decide." She batted her eyelashes at you, and gave you a gentle, but cruel smile "Come on Anon, we can go have fun at the pool and have ice cream. And all the food you can eat. None of that slop these two were offering. Then we can maybe play some games… Doesn't that sound like fun?"

Silver Spoon stepped behind you away from Applebloom's and Sweetie Belle's view and gently rubbed her hoof along your spine "Come on Anon, we have money and power and all sorts of things. These losers don't have anything like we do. Just listen to what Diamond Tiara is saying and you'll realize how right she is. She's always right"

Ngh… dammit. At anytime, AT ANYTIME. Girls touching you would have been the bees knees. But fuck if this wasn't making you uncomfortable. Still… if playing a long didn't get these fucks away. Then you had to take a more direct approach. Because fuck them, you were going to see red and kill a niggapone if this kept up. No, it was time to do this like a goddamn human.

You gave a traitorous smile. "You know… you might be right. Maybe I should go with you two"

Diamond Tiara's own grin became vicious as she looked over to Applebloom and Sweetie Belle, who gasped in horror "Thought so… Nopony wants to hang out with losers"

You turn your gaze to Diamond Tiara completely. "I agree actually… but I am a pony who demands insight. I mean, if I don't hang out with you. How else will I know the level of degree of loserdom that you both have."

"Well… that can… Wait what?!" Diamond Tiara was caught by surprise. Silver spoon gasped at your impertinence to her friend. "What did you say to me?!"

You didn't falter. no, you weren't going to do this like some Saturday morning cartoon. It was time to crush them. "You heard me. for all of 3 minutes, being around you two made me realize I'd rather be around some sewage. At least that's cleaner."

Sweetie Belle and Applebloom stood in shock. Amazed by your words.

"How dare you! What gives you the right to talk like that to me? You're just blank flank gutter trash! Even you're name is stupid sounding!" Diamond Tiara barked with anger in her tone

You couldn't smile. You could feel your rage and arrogance compounding into one.

"I don't even care about my name or getting a cutie mark. Hate to break it to you. But I happen to think cutie marks are actually not that important. What I think what is important is my friends."

Diamond Tiara scoffed, but it was evident she was still pissed. "How stupid are you? He's stupid. Don't you think Silver Spoon?"

Her friend nodded "Yeah, I don't u-understand how anypony could think that" Silver Spoon was buckling. She could see you weren't being phased… she couldn't understand it. How could a pony not care about a cutie mark...you had to be rusing, she thought.

"Maybe I am… but at least i'm not black hearted, little stains who for all their worth need to have their daddy and mommy do things for them like freaking tumors. Oh, and that remark about Scootaloo… you best take that back"

"Or what? What are you going to do? You can talk all you want. But we are still better than you!" Diamond Tiara tried taking the offensive, Silver Spoon was getting more worried by the moment.

You gave… an intimidating evil smirk. When Applebloom and Sweetie Belle saw it. Internally, they didn't even recognize you. "I'll smash you to bits. I feel… it's been a long time coming. I don't even care that you are girls. I'll turn you both into pulp. I don't really care. So… take it back."

Silver Spoon shook and hid behind Diamond Tiara. She's never met a colt so violent sounding. "D-diamond...m-maybe we should apologize...I-I-"

Diamond Tiara looked at her, and growled "Don't be a wimp! He's obviously bluffing. Only an idiot would strike me!"

"Try me… Go ahead… Try me. I don't care who you are. I'm not the kind of guy you should be messing with" You've always wanted this. You hated bully characters so damn much… especially ones who never got their comeuppance… It was almost fetish-tier on the level of vengeance you had. You wondered if those from the board back at home felt the same.

Diamond Tiara smirked, and walked towards you "Heh, go ahead. Hit me. But once you do, my Daddy will have you shipped off to wherever you came from. It's obvious you aren't from Ponyville. We'll send you, and your parents down to the worst corners of Equestria if you even THINK of hitting me"

Oh… That’s rich… she didn't even realize your circumstances. Might as well let her in on it. "Ahh, I see. Well, it'd just be my dad then. I'm an orphan"

Diamond Tiara smirked at you, she was being arrogant "You think I care that you are an orphan? Pleeeease, you need to know your place. So why don't you back down, and go off with your stupid friends. Because I am not apologizing"

You don't even blink. "I'm gonna give you one last warning. Because I'm going to let you in on something. I… Don't… Care. You can't do anything to me and I can make you AND your friend into bloody punching bags."

Silver Spoon began to shake Diamond Tiara "Come on, let's get out of here! He's crazy!"

Diamond Tiara threw her off, knocking her down. No way she was gonna let anyone. especially some orphan no nothing. Bring her down. "Do you really think you're invincible? Do you even know who my daddy is?"

You chuckle, oh yes. Here it comes. "Do you know who mine is?"

She rolled her eyes. "Who? Doughnut Joe?"

You say it, in a cruelly quiet voice. "Discord..."

Everypony. Sweetie Belle, Applebloom, Silver Spoon, and now… even Diamond Tiara. Gasp in shock.

"Y-you're lying! That freak is a heartless moron who can't even do anything a-anymore." Diamond stuttered.

That was it. the fear in her eyes. Oh man, you were lapping it up. Having human intellect and logic was so juicy right now. Trumping Saturday morning logic was great.

"I'm sure you believe that. Now then… how about that apology, huh? Or do you and your "Daddy" want to spend the rest of your lives as grapes?"

Silver Spoon freaked out and screamed "I'm sorry! I won't even tell anypony! I Swear!" and ran away, tail literally between her legs.

Ohh that’s good… It might be pretty bad if anypony said you were threatening another pony. "Your turn… Oh yeah, Silver Spoon might have a point, It might be unwise to tell anypony that I threatened you. You wouldn't want to escalate things now, would you?"

Diamond Tiara was sweating bullets. "You can't...Princ-Princess Twilight wouldn't a-allow it"

"...only if she finds out. I wonder if my dad is watching right now..." You didn't know.

Diamond Tiara gulped hard… that was it "F-fine..."


"I-I'm sorry...about what I said...and I won't tell...daddy..or anypony else"

"Good...now leave me and my friends alone."

Diamond Tiara nodded, and walked off. Trying to look as dignified as possible. OH SHIT..THAT WAS SWEET! HAHAHAHAH!

With the pressure and anger off. You began to laugh like a madman. Holy shit..That was awesome!

"Did you girls see that! Holy...OH BOY..You gotta admit! That was the freaki...ng...grea...test.."

As you turn, you begin to slow on your words as Applebloom and Sweetie Belle look at you… horrified on what they just heard and witnessed. Dead silent.

....Oh fuck...

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