Twilight curses herself and now inanimate objects won't shut up. for instance, the lamp over there is unhappy in his marriage, and cannot find a way out. the curtains are avid social justice warriors, and twilight's quill pen is a kinky lil thing.
now Twilight can't write anymore because the moans are too awkward.

"Would you tell anypony if you knew the world was going to end, Twilight Sparkle?"

While trying to get their cutie marks near the border of the Everfree Forest, the Cutie Mark Crusaders encounter a strange creature. It follows them back to Ponyville where the other residents of Ponyville each get to encounter this gelatinous blob. How will these encounters turn out?
Lets find out.

Takes place between seasons 3 and 4.
Warning: May contain moments of extreme D'aww.
Learn more about SCP-999 by clicking on its name.
This is my first story; sorry if it isn't that good.

Featured on 6/7/2014
Squee.

During "Twilight's Kingdom", Tirek gave Discord some free time to be himself and have some chaotic fun, while he goes inside the castle to talk to the princesses. What did Discord do during his free time?

Following his tumultuous defeat, King Sombra is flung across space and time to exit out a human's malfunctioning toaster. For weeks, Sombra monologues his revenge to destroy those that hurt him. But seven months later, when a route back to Equestria is found, does he not seem all that interested in returning.

Edited by spigo.

Prequel: The Roommate From Tartarus
Side Sequel: (Not My) Home Sweet Home

Update: labelled as complete. The last three chapters will remain as bonus chapters.

What would you do if you woke up one day to find an Alicorn Princess Goddess passed out drunk on your doorstep, unable to be awoken? Rainbow Dash certainly has her hooves full with this one. How is she going to handle this??

Immortality isn't all it's cracked up to be. Just ask someone who would know. Like... Apple Bloom, for instance.

Written for the February Writeoff - Closing Time

Featured on Equestria Daily.
Review by PaulAsaran
Review by Cerulean Voice
Review by Titanium Dragon

While visiting Twilight Sparkle, Rarity stumbles across an old book that, upon first glance, seems to provide a detailed insight into time-worn customs on the preservation of beauty and grace. Eager to expand upon her knowledge, she takes the book home with her.

She soon discovers that the book offers more than she ever could have imagined, and its secrets can be hers...

...if she's willing to pay the price.

Prompt and editing provided by Cold in Gardez
Additional editing provided by Themaskedferret

It's Sombra and Pinkie's 10th Hearts and Hooves Day, and while they want to celebrate, there's one issue...

Their son.

This takes place after the events of No Day But Today, though it's not really a sequel. This is a Hearts and Hooves Day special, really. Yeah, I know it's late, but whatever, I do what I want.

Letters. Everyone writes them, and they're not just for ponies. Be they carriers of serious news, friendly correspondence between pen pals, or declarations of heart and heartbreak, each one is written with a clear purpose or goal in mind.

Celestia uses them to try and keep her faithful student and friends in line, and try to keep an unbalanced world on the straight and narrow.

This is much harder than it sounds.

Now with an audio reading by Lady Tenkage!

Side Stories:

Old-Fashioned Bar Hoppers, featuring Celestia, Mayor Mare, and Granny Smith shenanigans.
Journal of an Adolescent Clone, featuring Sunny and Moony shenanigans since Season 5.