Dear Journal,
Incredibly, Discord decided to update our clown outfits today by adding shiny red noses and changing out our wigs from balding to afro. Smiling seems like the proper response to having more hair, but I’ve had too much of his shenanigans to smile in earnest anymore.
Catching him with his proverbial (or literal) pants down remains the most difficult challenge to date. Of course, Luna remains optimistic we’ll get him. “Rainbow magic can--and will--work, Celestia!” Dear sister, I wish I could share in your enthusiasm.
If we could obtain those Elements he so generously flaunts on his upside-down slanted throne, I would gladly take them and use them in a heartbeat. Sadly, he makes sure a great deal of his time is devoted to keeping an eye on us. Watching, waiting for any sign that our current arrangement doesn’t satisfy either of us anymore. I’ll be honest--at this point, it really isn’t.
Lately, his demands of us have grown more ridiculous. “Laps! I want a thousand laps, my royal fools!” Never have I felt so humiliated in my life running track for a draconequus on a unicycle! Gods have mercy on my legs, for they burn and ache with misery akin to my Royal Guard training program.
Though I must admit many of his demands have given me so much exercise I’ve actually lost weight! Offering my thanks to him would seem beneficial just for that alone…
No, I must stay firm. Even if he’s helped me do something I’ve struggled for years to do myself, the other things he has done here cannot stand as they are. Getting better terms on our foolish deal is paramount to our success in making sure Equestria isn’t a complete madhouse. Other ponies must not be caught in his sights, and we must keep him entertained and away from them while we figure out a better way to deal with him.
The time for another friendly chat is coming soon. If I’m reading this journal entry correctly, it seems he’s willing to come to new terms as well. As I thought, he’s definitely been spying on me and my journals, but cursing my diction to hide his responses is insanely clever, if needlessly complex and... ugh, nonsensical.
Time is wasting the longer I spend writing this journal. Everfree border in ten minutes, Discord; don't keep us waiting.
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Wow, I half expected her to have gone completely mad by now.
Wow that hidden message, well done!
6712725 I don't see it. Elaborate?
Since Celestia loves cake so much, I think it would a funny idea for Discord to tie a cake to a string and the string onto Celestia's horn so that she can constantly run after the cake to lose more weight.
36.media.tumblr.com/195e3faf03e2be90b9b1fe426ee1bf93/tumblr_n8bmfw6Csr1s5cdlpo1_1280.png
6712734
If you combine the first letter of each sentence, you will get a secret message. it is:
discord is willing to negotiate
6712749 Ah. I feel silly now. Thanks.
I would hate to be in Celestia's position right now.
Chaos is as much unexpected emergent patterns as it is apparent nonsense. It's all a matter of probability. Weigh the dice enough and you can even get something as unlikely as Celestia slimming down.
6712741
So close yet so far....
6711910 Oh. ok.
Eh, at least this Celestia might one day bore him enough eventually that he offers them a reality reset and him only watching with one single active "agent of chaos" to do things... Oh wait, that story is more than a million words long already.
6712749
Oh my Arceus ... Celestia ... God ... Whatever.
That totally blew my mind. Not that I didn't believe you, I still had to go back and check. Well played, Tired Old Man, well played. That is just ... I mean totally ... well played.
MfG NIchtraucher
Discord's biggest weakness has always been boredom. He will always give his opponents more and more chances until they inevitably beat him. If the Elements of Harmony didn't exist Discord would probably invent them.
6714301
You know, who's to say that their very existence is not due to him?
6715452 He's been around since the time of the dinosaurs, he may well have created a tree of harmony just to make things "sporting." The Elements basically shut down after Celestia temporarily overrode them (or whatever) to banish Luna. Discord could plunge them into space, but instead he hangs them off the side of his throne, right by where he keeps Celestia and Luna. Additionally, it sounds like he has re-activated them somehow.
I bet he did dump them in deep space at the beginning... but that was a year ago, and nothing changed.
Then he brought them back to say the Castle of the Two Sisters ... but ordinary ponies are just avoiding him anyway as he focuses on Celestia and Luna, so no one else is going to mess with those weird grey rocks to try and fight Discord.
So he has to re-activate them and keep them close to Luna and Celestia, just to give Luna hope so she will keep being entertaining... And now it looks like he is willing to negotiate again with Celestia, because he has already gotten bored with the new arrangement. Sooner or later he's just going to hand them over and suggest a straight-up duel, because Discord has grown bored with everything else.
The only other real alternative is if Discord basically hands power back to Celestia and Luna, and approaches his current canon situation from the other side, because that way he A)skips the boredom or running a country and B)has boundaries in the form of the Princesses he can test himself against.
6712899 The least probable thing of all!
6713147 what story?
6712749
Dear Celestia, you’re right. I even took notes.
Seriously, I wonder how you people find these. Certain secrets are so obscure you’d have to be actively searching for them. Obscure secrets are always fun though, always good for a laugh or a shock. Really, they are, I’m being honest. Definitely fun if they’re as well hidden as the one in this chapter.