• Member Since 11th Jul, 2014
  • offline last seen Nov 19th, 2020


Just a nice, polite Canadian.



Following his tumultuous defeat, King Sombra is flung across space and time to exit out a human's malfunctioning toaster. For weeks, Sombra monologues his revenge to destroy those that hurt him. But seven months later, when a route back to Equestria is found, does he not seem all that interested in returning.

Edited by spigo.

Prequel: The Roommate From Tartarus
Side Sequel: (Not My) Home Sweet Home

Update: labelled as complete. The last three chapters will remain as bonus chapters.

Chapters (19)
Comments ( 970 )

dude you need to continue this, maybe something about the elements or the princess coming to the human world because they noticed sombra was still alive and feared his return

I really enjoyed this story!

This was really enjoyable.

Also motherfucker, you have legit working wizardry book and you work at a call centre!? SHENANIGANS! I CALL SHENANIGANS!

i like this a lot! :pinkiehappy:

I remained silent on the topic of colorful pony genocide.

The best sentence I have ever read in my life.

Heh, that was pretty fun.

5636858 Maybe make Sombra get a job, picture it an evil tyrant working at costco.

5638267 Thank you!

5636858 So would they try to kill him or join him on the couch?

5638714 surprise us, maybe they all end envying him

5638436 there is already a fic about sombra working at the equestria equivalent of Mcdonalds pretty funny

5638714 heck he could also return to equestria while leaving everyone else trapped on earth

10/10 baby. Makeasequelorsomethingplrasesir?

This was a cute story. I actually wouldn't mind seeing him try (and fail) at a part-time job.

Procrastinators UNITE!... Tomorrow...maybe... I dunno I sorta have stuff to do so...

5639057 I meant in the human world imagine how perplexed you would be if the guy behind the counter was not only a king but a talking pony made of pure evil and cuteness. doubly so when you realize someone hired him.

Anyone else see this and think of "The Devil is a Part-timer"?

Well, you did, I think.

I would like to see these two get sent to Equestria and see what happens. Lazy Sombra and Steve the Human, trying to survive in a world that hates their guts.

I kinda want more.
How do I know if you are going to make more and I'm not here to read the next chapter? I'm scared as Sombra is.
Good story Seriously someone mention me if there is more chapters

Well congratulations sir, you are an unintentional closet weeaboo!

Here is an informational song about your peoples:

And a moustache.

I can already tell this is going to be good.

5638714 ... I can So see Luna crashing on that couch as well, arguing with Sombra about who ate the last bag of crisps and... well... bossing Steve around.

Not gonna lie, this was my first thought when I read the description:

5640681 Well now I do. My first thought, when I read the description, was of the Toaster from Fallout New Vegas: Old World Blues.


GOP(Not the politics one, the other one) APPROVES!

Seriously, Sombra needs more character development. Like a lot.

A new chapter?
Freaking Awesome

Really glad you decided to take this further than a one-shot


“Ponies don’t talk in this world. And I think they’d look a little weird next to a whole cast of other humans. I mean, think of it like this: imagine a single human entering your pony world and trying to interact with everyone for some silly reason. Wouldn’t that sound ridiculous?”


welcome to costco, if you don't buy something I'll bash your head in.

Thought this was a one-shot...So we're going to see more?

I still can't think of anything that would make someone more unlikeable than eating a cat.

This is absolutely amazing!

I am a huge, huge fan of this. Please do more!

sweet work dude keep it up

5682993 Eating a dog? Though that would be a matter of preference.

Friggen hilarious. Then again if Sombra had eaten my cat Miss Sparkle would have gotten Sombra wrapped up in duct tape.

5682673 Thank you! I have a couple ideas to extend this a few more chapters, at least.

5682760 Shots fired.

5682956 A little more, yes.

5683055 Thank you for saying so! I'll see what I can do.

5683529 Sombra was just hungry and didn't know any better. Plus, you try and fork him over to Twilight and he'll go all puppy eyes on you. He's a lazy, manipulative bastard.

I'm going to make a post saying how ironic that is...later.

Good to see more of this.

Except stopping time would mean that they couldn't breathe because the air wouldn't be moving...

Oh nice! I can't wait to see where this goes.

Sombra ate a cat... Arent ponies herbivorous?

Oh and hes irredeemable. I love cats.

Gotta say, I'm loving Sombra in this.
Curious if what he was looking up is what I'm thinking it is. Hopefully not.

“Found you!”

abandon ship, every man for himself!!!!

I'm reading this chapter and I'm imagining something like this. Or at least this being set to that scene's music.

MST3K Mantra is in full effect, I believe.

This is simply hilarious! I love how you've depicted Sombra, menacing but adorable. :yay:

So far, I hadn’t come into contact with a single pony that wasn’t a manipulative bastard.

Bastard means illegitimate child, so technically you've met only one so far if Sombra is a bastard child.

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