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// The Best Pet is Subjective. Also, Phoenix is Best Pet. 
// Story: Letters from an Irritated Princess 
// by Tired Old Man 
//------------------------------//

Dear Rainbow Dash,

I applaud you. You've given me more context than any letter I've received so far, even if my first and foremost recommendation is to pull your head out of the clouds and shove it in a dictionary so you know what the term "tenacity" means. I don't mind it being pretty much double the length, but you don't have to be so wordy. Twilight can help with that.

I still can't believe how much I can deduce from this letter. You went looking for pets with strong qualities, but ultimately decided on a pet with a can-do attitude. And it's a tortoise! For once, I finally understand mostly everything behind how you learned the lesson!

Everything except for how you got a can-do attitude from such a tepid creature. But given that Philomena lights candles for me at night without my asking, perhaps your new pet did something for you that mattered without your order. 

Such an act, no matter the scale of the action, should be greatly appreciated. That's the sign of a pet that cares for you as much as you do to them. Or will do, in your case. Loyalty begets loyalty, Rainbow Dash. 

Speaking of pets, Luna's looking for one. She's immensely jealous of my bird, so she's looking for one of her own.

Please pass this on to Fluttershy--I presume she is the one who facilitated your pet adoption. Luna is looking for a Corvus raven, a bird of the stars. It has a wingspan roughly the size of three ponies head to flank, and black feathers with white dots interspersed to mimic the night sky. It even has its own rebirth cycle by bursting from its chest in a violent fashion and--

Wait, wrong page. It actually rises from the shadow it casts upon death. But seriously, that other rebirth was morbid. What even--

Oh. Wow, that thing is ugly. You don't want to see this... or hear about it, so I'll wrap this up. Just pass along that information about the bird and see if Fluttershy knows anything. If not, ask Twilight. She'll have a copy of "Nightcrawlers: Creatures that Creep, Crawl, and Live Under Starry Skies." It's page 35.

Do not read page 34.

Sincerely,

Princess Celestia

Evening, Luna. What brings you in here besides that distasteful Trot Topics magazine?

Something I need to see? Oh, this should be rich. Did the paparazzi blow up my arse again? Because I swear to the gods, it is NOT that huge!

...that's a giant pile of gems. With Sapphire Shores sitting on them, dressed in enough gems to be an hors d'oeuvre for a dragon.

"This pile of gems isn't altered. It's actually a donation from an overly doting fan." Oh, so that's what's going on. 

Well, looks like Rarity and I have a different discussion now. Luna, tell the Dogs the cafe date's cancelled.