//------------------------------// // Go Over There and Never Come Back Again, Part 1 // Story: Letters from an Irritated Princess // by Tired Old Man //------------------------------// Journey Entry Number… eh, let’s call this one Potato. Sunny and Moony are away for the day over at Rainbow Falls, returning the following morning.. In other words, it was yet another rare time my sister and I had the castle to ourselves since their introduction. And I loved every last second of it. In fact, today had been shockingly calm. No nobles showed up for the afternoon court complaint session, which is outright miraculous given they always have something to complain about. I’d almost call this dreamlike in a way, except Luna’s assured me this is not a dream. That makes this the best day I’ve ever had in centuries. I’ve caught up on a few books left unfinished for a time, took a walk through the gardens without Philomena and Shadebeak squawking as Sunny chased them around to ‘help’ with their preening, made a batch of moon cookies without worry of any doughy eldritch abominations… truly, it’s a day so mundane anything abnormal would actually make it seem interesting. Frankly, in these final evening hours very little could make this day the worst day ever. Knocking at the door? Curses, I think I spoke too soon. Who’s there? Sunny? Goodness, you’re back so soon. I thought you planned on staying there overnight. Was Rainbow Falls really that uninteresting? Well, I wouldn’t use “frustrating” to describe anything there other than the annual trading event, but if you’re really that peeved, you know where Brutus is. Just be careful with the reinforced wall--you put a dent in it yesterday, and I had it built to last for the rest of the month. Uh, no. I’m not going to watch you hit the wall. We went over this at least a dozen times. I trust you to be able to hit a wall without adult supervision. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have an entry to finish since you’re back early-- ...There’s a changeling on my desk, and it doesn’t smell like coffee. Sunny! Hit it with the big stick! Ow! Not me, the changeling! This is not the time for roughhousing! You’re still hitting me! I am not a changeling, that one is! Get serious and HIT THE CHANGE-- … … … ~~~ Journal Entry Number… wait, the numbers are vegetables? Oooookay, that’s weird, but whatever. I guess this entry is… Celery? Ahem. I am Chitin, leader of the Canterlot Capture Team. The castle is ours, and rather swiftly conquered. Our intel about the princesses employing body doubles served us well--infiltration was such a breeze, nopony suspected a thing. Although actually capturing the princesses proved to be a difficult task. Celestia took at least thirty blows to the noggin before Elytron finally managed to render her unconscious. Moving her body into a cocoon, even with magic, felt like lifting three wedding cakes at the same time. Let it be said that taking down an alicorn princess is not easy when you aren’t a love-supercharged queen. She needed a full two minutes to catch her breath. Midgut and Tarsus had a far easier time. Luna had been in the middle of channeling a spell, presumably whatever it is she casted to view dreams. And lucky them, she weighed far less than her sister. They got a cakewalk while we dealt with a heavy, dense cake, I suppose. As far as I know, the whole plan went off without a hitch. Tarsus and Elytron have already replaced the princesses, and we’re about to teleport the real ones over to the hive before sunrise. ...Wait, how ARE we going to handle the sunrise? I hope Chrysalis has a plan for that, otherwise this might not last as long as she thinks it will. Oh well. If the body doubles come back, we should be able to handle them. Theoretically, at least.