[story isn't dead; completion is just too grand a task for me to take at this point in time]

Equestria Girls. It's the end of the school week and Rainbow Dash can't wait to kick back and relax for an awesome weekend of partying with her friends. It's also progress reports time at Canterlot High, and one of the Super Fun™ activities planned (by Twilight, who else?) involves an unboxing of their grades. This doesn't go too well when Rainbow is forced to reveal her whopping 0.3 GPA and leaves in tears.
Intelligence comes in many forms, but Fs only come in one. Luckily for Rainbow Dash, that's the letter that friendship starts with.

/x/x/x/

Takes place after The Legend Of Everfree but before Forgotten Friendship.
Prequel to my fic Milkshake, and begins a Sci!TwiDash friends-to-lovers arc.
Part of my extended Equestria Girls Continuity.
Tagged for naughty words and minor social drugs.

Content warning: contains underage drinking, cannabis use, discussion of teenage sexuality, a scene containing homophobic and lesbophobic slurs, and struggles with autism and ADHD.

Twilight Sparkle, Princess Celestia's most prized and faithful student, is being sent to Ponyville to learn about the magic of friendship.

And she's not happy about it.

Hear what Celestia has to say back! Check out the spinoff:
Responses To A Disgruntled Friendship Student by keaton-furman-prower

Still want more? Have a multiverse spinoff by MixMassBasher, my contributing writer for Seasons 5-9.
Letters From Across the Disgruntled Multiverse

Editing by Neko Majin C.

Disclaimer:
The following is a work of parody, and is protected as Fair Use under section 17 U.S. Code § 107 of US Copyright Law. My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic and all affiliated characters are property of Hasbro Inc.