• Member Since 21st Feb, 2013

Officer Hotpants


Quando omni flunkus, moritati

Comedic Stories 131 stories
  • Comedic Stories 131 stories - 66 unread chapters A laugh a day keeps the Eldritch Horros at bay, they say. For a while, anyway.
    Created by Officer Hotpants
    - October, 2014
Found 83 stories in 43ms

Total Words: 2,462,499
Estimated Reading: 6 days

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  • Interviews 408 stories Stories that have had their author interviewed


  • Reviewed 0 stories Stories that have been reviewed
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Twilight is an intelligent mare, and always has something to say. But when a group of bizarre creatures shows up at her library offering life long service and devotion, for once she's at a loss for words. Which is too bad, because she'd really love to ask: what's a human and why are they so weird?

Story Image by: Megan Lara

Chapters (1)
E

King Sombra’s dark influence was obliterated by the Crystal Heart, and the villain is well and truly dead. But when he attempts to steal the afterlife of an innocent victim, a human spirit is left hurtling towards Equestria, where this unfortunate soul is revived into the only vessel available: the reconstituted body of King Sombra himself.

Thus, a cheerfully oblivious alien is crammed into the form of the most evil and malicious being Equestria has ever known. Not that Shining Armor and Cadence know this, of course. As far as they are concerned, the King is back and he’s lost his fricking mind.

Click here for the TV Tropes page!

Chapters (4)
E
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You wake up on Christmas morning to discover that Derpy has decided to pay you a visit. Since reality is apparently out to lunch, you roll with it.

Yeah, this is basically a goofy little thing I wrote as a Christmas present for one of my friends, and I figured someone else might be mildly amused by it, so I thought I'd put it up here. It's hardly my best work, but it was fun to write. If you expect something that makes the least bit of sense, look elsewhere.

And this is probably the only time you're ever going to see me writing a 2nd person, present tense story. :p

Chapters (1)
T

Jon Stewart needs to find a way to get more people to watch his show. To do this he welcomes a new series of guests from a far off land containing monsters, magic, and most importantly... ponies!
Join him on an adventure that has him matching wits with sentient mythical creatures ranging from god-like ponies to a fire breathing dragon! Each "Episode" marks a different MLP character getting a chance to travel to the human world for an interview on The Daily Show with Jon Stewart.


Please feel free to leave a suggestion for who Jon should interview next.
Disclaimer: For proper context it is highly recommended to reach each chapter in order as many interviews allude to past guests and events.
A special thanks to Zeta040, Cantankerous, and Zervziel for proofreading several stories listed below.

List of Characters who have already appeared:
- Chapter 1: Spike
- Chapter 2: Derpy
- Chapter 3: Applejack
- Chapter 4: Ms. Cheerilee
- Chapter 5: Octavia
- Chapter 6: Zecora
- Chapter 7: Mayor Mare
- Chapter 8: Twilight
- Chapter 9: Trixie
- Chapter 10: DJ Pon3
- Chapter 11: Rainbow Dash
- Chapter 12: Iron Will
- Chapter 13: Fancy Pants
- Chapter 14: Queen Chrysalis
- Chapter 15: Luna
- Chapter 16: A Changeling
- Chapter 17: Rarity
- Chapter 18: Lyra and Bon Bon
- Chapter 19: The Cutie Mark Crusaders
- Chapter 20: Discord
- Chapter 21: Fluttershy

Chapters (107)
T
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When the ad for a roommate was answered by a pony, Louis was more than a bit surprised. He had heard about them in the news, and how they had come from another world. But what Bronies had wished for wasn't exactly what they found. Now the real ponies are visiting earth, and he has one living with him. How will the straight laced normal guy learn to deal with a hyperactive pink pony, and how will she learn to live in a world without magic?

A bit of a sitcom style slice of life, where the real ponies are as different from the show as we are from cartoon humans. Rated PG13 for innuendo and language. Expect foul language, F-bombs, sexual innuendos, and tons of low-brow dirty humor.
Featured! 2/7/14
Room for Rent: FAQ
Edited by Zyrian

Chapters (14)
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What happens when the Reds and Blues finally get Church out of the Epsilon unit? Caboose decides he wants a turn in the unit, of course! What happens next? Well let's just say he always did say he wanted a pony, now he has a world full of them.

[Before asking questions in the comments, please read!]
- The first chapter is the end of the ninth season. I put it there just to ease the flow of the story.
- You will probably be extremely confused if you have not seen the last two seasons of Red vs Blue.
- You will probably be even MORE confused if you have never heard of Caboose.
- I placed a series of hyphens to show when the story becomes my own work during the prologue.
- Click here to watch the series if you have not.
- FAQ

Uploaded to FimFiction: Monday, March 5th, 2011 at 2:30 PM.
Uploaded to RvBfics: Monday, March 26th, 2011 at 11:50 PM.
Linked on Bungie.net: Saturay, March 31st, 2011 at 3:29 AM.

Proofread/Edited By - Pissfer

Current Title Image:
The Group by ~Butts-are-Nice

Past Title Images:
Caboose and Pinkie by ~SarahWidiyanti
Caboose and Pinkie by ~Farore769
Church and Twilight by ~Farore769

Dramatic Readings:
ShadowflashMLP

Fan Art:
Caboose's Drawing by ~Depressing Rain

Chapters (257)
T
Source

The only human in Equestria has an awkward time in a bar. Mostly due to the massive language barrier.

Chapters (4)
T
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This story is a sequel to My Little Caboose: Blue is Magic!


It has been one month since the Elements of Harmony were used to trap Discord again, and it has been one month since Twilight lost one of her closest friends, the only consolation of which being that Church was finally getting some well deserved rest. At least, that is what she and the others believed. Discord, still trapped within Church's mind, has been picking away at his sanity the entire time, messing with his memories, making him forget what was real and forcing him to remember what wasn't. When he finally escapes, will Church be able to distinguish between reality and the memories Discord tampered with, or will his slim grip on reality finally give out?

If the ponies he is led to believe are his friends are of any indication, probably the latter.

[Before asking questions in the comments, please read!]
- This is a sequel to the completely unjustifiably popular, My Little Caboose: Blue is Magic!
- You probably will be extremely confused if you have not read that before this.
- You probably would be even MORE confused if you have never heard of Caboose.
- Click here to watch the series if you have not.
- FAQ

Chapters (90)
T

Tirek threatens to take over all of Equestria with his magic-stealing powers. In order to keep him from obtaining their alicorn magic, the four princesses must hide their power away...

... in an old potato.

Chapters (1)
E

Twilight Sparkle definitely learned her lesson from her last time-travel experience. This one's not her fault. Really. Sometimes nature can be... annoying.

Featured on Equestria Daily!

Many thanks to Uma for the story idea.

Reading by The Living Library Player Society.

Chapters (1)