Dresstic Measures
"So what was that about?" Twilight asked curiously.
"Apparently we have dinner plans." Tex said, slightly confused now that she had actually said it.
"Aw, you and that Tucker guy becoming a thing?" The Necronomicon asked. "Don't worry, me and Do are up for double dates!"
"Does that book have an off switch?" Tex asked threateningly.
"Not that I know of." Church sighed.
"Shame. But are you guys up for dinner? Tucker and Dash told me everyone's gathering for dinner."
"Let me check my calender." The Necronomicon said with a laugh.
"Sounds good, I guess." Church nodded, looking at Twilight.
"That sounds like an excellent idea." Twilight said courteously. "It will be nice to finally sit down with some friends instead of running around through the Everfree."
"Or just being out of dangers way." Church added. "Actually, Caboose is going to be there. When he's around you're always in dangers way."
"Just give me a few moments to collect myself, and I'll be all set to go." The Necronomicon said, falling silent.
"Alright then let's go. No point sitting around here, right?" Tex asked.
"Right." Twilight nodded, looking over to Spike.
"Alright!" Spike said with excitement, jumping onto Twilight's back. "Time to eat!"
"Glad to see someone is enthusiastic." Tex smirked, looking over to Church.
"Enthusiastic is my middle name." Church muttered sarcastically as he opened the door. "Let's just get this over with. The less time I am around the others, the less of a chance I have of dying."
"There's the Church we know." Tex snickered as they filed out the door, being sure to lock it behind them.
"Alright, I'm ready... guys?" The Necronomicon asked, looking around the library."Nobody sides with Ol' Necky."
The four started making their way to Sugar Cube Corner, Twilight giving Tex advice on how to make friends while Church drifted behind them wishing that he was not there. Spike had hopped off of Twilight's back halfway there to talk to Church.
"Got something you want to say Church?" Spike asked with a smile.
"Because whenever I say something's going to go wrong nobody listens..." Church muttered.
"Do you think something will go wrong?"
"I'm one hundred percent certain." Church nodded. "But I'll live... hopefully."
They eventually made it to Sugar Cube Corner, where Twilight instantly knocked on the door.
"Heya Twi!" Pinkie giggled as she opened the door. "Just on time too! Sarge and Applejack just arrived."
"It's nice to hear Gary didn't do any permanent damage." Tex smirked, but her eyes rested on Grif standing next to Fluttershy.
"Yup! Now we can decide where we want to go!" Pinkie said, hopping up and down. "I'm so excited."
"Yeah... why don't you guys decide where we go." Tex said, nodding at Fluttershy to come over. "Hey, Fluttershy, can I talk to you for a sec?"
"O-okay." Fluttershy said nervously, quickly making her way over to Tex, where she stopped and waited patiently.
"Preferably outside."
Fluttershy nodded and quickly trotted out the door.
"Be out in a minute." Tex murmured as she walked out after Fluttershy.
"Careful out there Flutters, she might crush your windpipe if you say something wrong." Grif said defensively.
"Bite me." Tex said icily as she slammed the door shut behind her.
Tex turned back to see Fluttershy covering her face with her mane, trying to avoid eye contact.
"I'm not going to hurt you." Tex sighed, causing Fluttershy to peek out from under her mane.
"W-what do you want to talk about."
"I just wanted to apologize." Tex grumbled.
"You do?"
"Yeah, I do. It wasn't right of me to try and hurt you like that." Tex said, extending her hoof. "So how about we put this shit behind us and move on with our lives."
"Okay." Fluttershy said, managing a small smile as she timidly shook Tex's hoof.
"And sorry again if that didn't really sound sincere. Apologies aren't my forté."
"That's alright, I know how much trouble you've been having right now." Fluttershy nodded.
"Thanks." Tex said, relieved that it was over with. "How about we go in and hear about what they've thought of?"
"Wait!" Fluttershy said as Tex turned to go back inside.
"What?"
"I hope you don't mind me asking, but why do you hate Grif?" Fluttershy asked.
"You wouldn't understand." Tex said, shaking her head.
"But I would like to try." Fluttershy pushed.
"Alright, back in the day the Reds manage to capture me, and that yellow asshat lorded it over me." Tex grunted. "That good enough for you?"
"Not really." Fluttershy shook her head. "I mean, that doesn't sound nice, but it's certainly no reason to go out of your way to see him in pain either."
"Fine, it's just... that guy gets on my nerves. And I mean really gets on my nerves." Tex said frustratingly.
"Why?"
"Because do you know what he does for a living? Nothing!" Tex said snappishly. "You can't just go through life not doing anything! You have to work to get what you want! All he does is eat and sleep. Eat and sleep. He preys off of everyone else to survive."
"That's not all he does." Fluttershy said with a sweet smile. "Sometimes he'll come to the market with me and-"
"He's covering up the fact that he's just using you by doing small things." Tex muttered with a sickening smirk. "I'll have to admit, that's something I didn't think he was smart enough to do."
"He's not using me..." Fluttershy said quietly.
"Oh? You feed him and you're giving him a place to stay and he doesn't have to do anything in return. In his eyes that's his perfect world. He has it made, and you're too innocent to see how he's manipulated you."
"He wouldn't do that." Fluttershy shook her head slowly. "Grif's a nice stallion. He isn't the one that you used to know."
"Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe I'm just being paranoid. But I call it like I see it." Tex shrugged. "I just don't want to see you or anybody get hurt by a jerk."
Fluttershy looked at the ground as Tex walked back inside Sugar Cube Corner.
"So, you guys decide on a place yet?" Tex asked, coming into the conversation that continued while she was outside.
"Yes, sadly the only place that can seat this many of us needs to be told in advance, but the same night would be too short notice." Rarity sighed.
"Well we could hypothetically take the train to Canterlot." Twilight said quietly.
"Fuck that! That's just begging for something to go wrong!" Church yelped.
"But they won't, we would take extra precautions as to make everything go right."
"But you're asking Grif to not be an idiot and Tex not to be violent." Sarge chuckled. "That's a recipe for everything to go wrong."
"Is that another double whammy?" Grif asked curiously.
Sarge glared at him right before bucking him in the face, sending him flying into the wall next to the door. Fluttershy opened the door to enter and saw Grif on the ground.
"Hey." Grif smirked as he rolled off the ground. "What'd Tex talk to you about."
"Nothing." Fluttershy said with an unsure smile, promptly walking towards the others, who were now in the heat of the conversation.
"Or, follow me for a second here... we don't go to dinner in a crowded place." Church said, acting shocked. "I know, I'm a god damn genius."
"Are ya sayin' this because you're worried 'bout causin' a scene, or because ya don't want t' be near th' Princess?" Applejack asked, narrowing her eyes on him.
"I'd be lying if I didn't say both." Church shrugged. "But Tex's mark isn't exactly one that would go about unnoticed, don't you think?"
"Ah guess." Applejack nodded, looking at the skull on Tex's flank. "It ain't exactly somethin' we can remove neither."
"Exactly."
"Hey Rarity, what if we got Tex to wear something?" Simmons asked, raising his brow. "It would be pretty easy to cover it up that way."
"That could work." Rarity said with a wide smile.
"Oh hell no, you aren't going to make me wear anything." Tex warned them.
"It's either that or you don't go." Church sighed as Tex shot him a harsh glare.
"Stop me. I'm not going to wear a frilly ass dress!"
"Well, it isn't exactly a dress. It really is more of a gown." Rarity said, slightly offended. "And it isn't frilly, it is extremely sleek."
Tex looked at her cutie mark and began to scowl, wishing that it had been something else. But she knew better than to bring any unnecessary attention to herself now that she was trying to fit in.
"What's it going to be?" Church asked.
"Give me the damn dress." Tex muttered disdainfully.
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lolwordplay
....Poor Necky
Tex will always be a bitch, won't she?
Tex........in a dress..........what foul reality am I reading about........oh wait ponies never mind it all good. -thumbs up-
Hmmm...
Tex is starting to become less of a complete bitch.
Still, "hope is the first step on the road to disappointment" (how many times have I used that line?)
awwwwww poor grif and fluttershy, i feel like grif just being himself is gonna make fluttershy think that maybe he is just using her.
Yay update!! Good chapter! I hope Fluttershy doesn't think bad of Grif now!
haha tex in a gown oh god she be pissed xDDD
Oh boy CHurch state he's a goddamn genius.....I smell foreshadowing in the next chapters
also when the time comes i can't wait for celestia to hear the news on how Caboose isn't dead that would be a priceless moment
Fluttershy is the toughest pony to use reverse-psychology on.
Why is Church so concerned about death in this chapter?
He can't die.
And now now your grif flut is now ruined!
Also love the word play.
973834
Not my FlutterGrif! 
973884
NWAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!
I don't know if I am right. Hang in there buddy I'm rooting for the ship too...
Tex, in a dress? While it hasn't frozen over, i think the temperature in hell just dropped a few degrees.
Tex in a dre-I mean, gown. This, I've gotta see.
Also, I didn't catch the wordplay. Can someone explain it?
I love Grif,
BUT IF HE IS USING FLUTTERSHY I WILL FUCKING KILL HIM
973699 267 times i follow you everywhere
Another chapter, another possibly ruined ship.
Nobody sides with Ol' Necky.
973692 it's official: I WANNA SEE TEX IN THAT DRESS AND AS A PONY WITH THAT CUTIE MARK
I want to see what she looks like as a pony (like what type is she, I am assuming Earth) and plus see her in that dress, and obviously how embarrassed she is. if someone has that picture Please for the love of Celestia show me! 
974163
Try seeing if someone will do that as a request on DA
WOAH, TEX WEARING A DRESS? I THOUGHT I WOULD NEVER SEE THE DAY
This is what will happen across the next few chapters. they go to party. Caboose goes to bathroom. Princess Celestia meets them and is pissed at Church and Tex. Caboose comes out and Celestia sees him
. Epic Shitstorm ensues
. (and then they all fucked). 
Alright Bro, I fucking love your story! This is...
SO AWESOME! like, yeah anyway. Poor...well really grif and tucker lately, theyve gotten the short end of the metaphorical stick haha. funny as always though, keep it up!
Next chapter, GO!
973816 Yes, he can't die. But his body that he is currently residing can still be destroyed and he still feels pain so theoretically, Church can fell the pain of death an infinite amount of times. Imagine that for a second. He's already died..what? 5 or 6 times in the actual show? So add 5 or 6 to an infinite amount of more times. And you have Churches complaints about death.
LOVE IT!
Tex in a dress?
Not even Roosterteeth themselves could manage that!
Tex, how can Grif be using Fluttershy? Remember that one day he told Fluttershy to take that day off? He did all the work, and when he got beat up by Sarge, he still told Fluttershy not to do anything about it, cause it was still her day off!
"Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe I'm just being paranoid. But I call it like I see it." Tex shrugged. "I just don't want to see you or anybody get hurt by a jerk."
So she closes her eyes whenever she interacts with someone? :V
973816 Church is worried about death because it freeking hurts. i think thats how the quote goes. and for griff and flutters. griff is actualy surprisingly really protective of the ones he loves. an example would be sister. also he tryed to stop tex from hurting fluttershy. normally if it was simmons he would just be laughing or running away scared.
*Looks out window*
So, first an apology, then a dress? Alright, time for the four horsemen. I'll be in my Derpy-shelter if you need me...
Goddamnit Tex! If you ruin my favorite shipping in this story, I will go outside, find a homeless pony, and pay them to take a dump in your bed!
975808
You sure you wanna piss off Tex?
pic or it didn't happen
973719
(This isn't going to go well...) Oh, um... We kinda... used a forbidden tome of magic to bring him back from the dead, and botched the spell, causing six pieces of me to be reborn into this world, and now we're working on rehabilitating these very dangerous entities into pony society...?
974888 ok but my bro did well tex in a skirt so this is how he got the idea so i want to be tex for Halloween so and then i had got this skirt for a different costume (i though it was a normal skirt but i like it) so my big bro came up with tex wearing a skirt and for if a red vs blue fan asked why is tex in a skirt i just say (my bro came up with this too) i lost a bet with grif
974076 lol you cant kill a charter lol i know what you mean FYI i have a crush on church and theta
though i am unsure about the crush on theta i think i might have one on theta or gamma(gary) don't ask how
976388 TO THE MOOOOON lol
oh and i don't like celestia just like church doesn't
977277 fair enough
977299
It would make sense, though. Not only did they hijack a highly valuable (and completely dangerous) magical tome, they used forbidden magic. And in using forbidden magic, they brought -six- dangerous beings into the world.
Whether or not the shards can be rehabilitated, the RvB crew and the Mane Six were all VERY irresponsible.
But hay, love makes you do crazy things.
976041 Saving the ship would be completely worth it.
Tex + Dress = Disaster
I think this is the correct equation.
I was waiting for another: "Nobody sides with 'Ol Necky", it was delivered flawlessly
I think you should do a chapter from a first person view of Ol' Necky
Well, that took a while. I just finished reading through this entire story and I must say that it is absolutely fantastic. Everything feels just about right, and I look forwards to seeing where this goes.
I imagine Necronomicon with the voice of Tim Curry. Wait. Tim Curry, Death, Holy Hell, this gives me an idea!
My Little IT: waHA! waHA! waHA! is Magic
977462 i love the though of it maybe i can take a picture of me in the costume and us it as my profile picture that would be
LOL
977519
i just hated celestia in the first place but ya love does but who care what they did i missed tex so now im happy