Aftermath
"You'd think these swank ponies would be running away from a food fight." Sarge murmured as he watched the dozens of ponies act like children.
"Lighten up, wouldja?" A voice said from beside him.
Sarge turned to see who was speaking to him, but ended up turning his head right into a pie.
"Who did that?" Sarge snapped as he wiped the muck from his face.
"Sorry Sarge." Applejack said as she sprinted away with a coy grin. "Mah hoof musta slipped."
Sarge glared at her for a few seconds, when something appeared in the corner of his eye. He grabbed Tucker by his neck and began dragging him towards the object that caught his eye.
"What gives?" Tucker snapped, tearing himself out of Sarge's grip.
"I was just thinking about showing these namby pamby horses how real soldiers deal with fights." Sarge smirked, motioning towards a large table that had hundreds of treats laying on it. He tensed his hind legs and kicked a chair, causing it to smash into the wall. "You thinking what I'm thinking?"
"This should be good." Tucker nodded as sparks began shooting off of his forelegs.
"Where are they going?" Rainbow Dash asked, flying well above the flying pastries, dodging the occasional stray that came her way.
"Hell if I know." Tex grunted. "But I'm about to find out."
"No, you have to stay here!" Rarity yelped, grabbing onto Tex's hind legs.
"Why?"
"If you stay out in the open you run the risk of dirtying my skirt!"
"Fine." Tex muttered reluctantly.
Rarity quickly crawled under the table to avoid getting dirty. Tex glared at Tucker and Sarge who were conversing with each other near the large table.
"Hey Tex, think fast!" Grif chuckled, throwing several small brownies that he ordered at her.
Tex's eyes snapped open. She kicked her chair into the air, grabbed it with her teeth and swung it at the oncoming treats, splattering most of them while sending a few of them towards Fluttershy. Fluttershy threw her forelegs over her head in fear, waiting to get hit by the half dozen confectionery. She heard the sound of them hitting her, but did not feel anything. She peeked out from under her hair to see Grif standing in front of her, face completely glazed.
"These taste great! I'm glad I ordered them." Grif said, using his tongue to wipe the icing off of the area around his mouth. He then smiled at Fluttershy and motioned towards the table. "Might want to get under the table if you don't want to get hit."
Fluttershy smiled back at him, then dove under the table as another stray cake flew her way, leaving the cake to hit Twilight in her face.
"Okay, I'm going to stop this now." Twilight said annoyingly, horn burning brightly.
"Let them have their fun." Church said, placing his hoof on her back.
"You want them to do this?" Twilight asked confusedly, forgetting about her spell.
"Well this fun doesn't seem particularly deadly, and the waiter will probably be the one that gets treated like the one who started it since she was the one who tripped."
"Then what are you going to do?" Twilight asked.
"I'm going to enjoy my meal." Church said with a smile, sitting back down. "Care to join me?"
"S-sure." Twilight blushed, taking her seat next to him. "I think my dessert was already thrown."
"No problem, I have an idea." Church said, looking around the restaurant. His eyes quickly rested on the table next to them, where he could see a slightly overweight Canterlot pony cowering under his table, being one of the only few who were doing so. "Hey, want some advice?"
'What?" The gray unicorn asked.
"Might not want to eat that cake of yours seeing as it looks like you already ate everyone else's."
"Why I never." The unicorn snarled. Reaching out from under the table he grabbed a cake and threw it at Church's face.
"Thanks." Church half waved to him, grabbing the cake out of the air with his magic before placing it in front of Twilight.
"Thank you." Twilight said. Picking up her fork with her magic, she stabbed a small chunk and put it in her mouth. "This is rather good, would you like a piece?"
"Why not?" Church smiled, grabbing a piece with his fork. "I can sort of see why Grif likes eating so much now."
"Speaking of me, save a slice for me for when this is over." Grif chuckled, tossing another pie.
"Sure thing."
"Go for it Blue!" Sarge snapped from the other side of the restaurant.
"Okay, now we might need to go under the table." Church sighed.
"What? Why?" Twilight asked.
A flash suddenly erupted in the restaurant, causing most of the ponies to shield their eyes. Twilight slowly opened her eyes to see Tucker spinning above a table, forelegs spread to his side, cutting the large, pastry filled table into bits with his electric blade. As the pieces of the table flew into the air, Sarge ran alongside each one, kicking them as hard as he could, showering the restaurant with baked goods. Church grabbed hold of Twilight and jumped under the table with her. Tex followed their lead an dove under the table as the pieces of food splattered against everyone else.
"Did you save me that cake?" Grif asked, just barely managing to dive under the table.
"Yeah." Church smirked, holding out the plate to him.
"Thank god!" Grif said, picking off bits to toss into his mouth.
"That escalated quickly." Simmons said curiously. "I mean, that really got out of hand fast."
"It certainly did jump up a few notches." Rarity agreed.
"It did, didn't it?"
"Yeah, I stabbed a guy in the heart." Caboose smiled.
"What?" Church asked quickly.
"Yeah, this other pony man had a banana split too, and we used them like swords! I hit him in the heart with it and he laughed."
"Okay, good."
The table cloth lifted up and the group looked to see Rainbow Dash and Applejack peeking under the table, both completely covered in food.
"Why are you guys hiding? You missed all the fun!" Rainbow Dash chuckled.
"Well that was interesting." Tex muttered, crawling out from under the table.
"I'll say. You somehow managed to keep your dress clean." Church smirked.
"It's a skirt." Tex muttered, raising a brow at Rarity's gasp. "What? I don't want out correcting me every time I call it a dress."
"Nevertheless, thank you for managing to keep it in tact." Rarity said with a nod of approval. "Chocolate is always so hard to get out of silk."
"Did you guys see that?" Tucker asked as he and Sarge slowly walked back to the group from the other side of the restaurant, chuckling the entire way.
"See what?" Church asked.
"The look on all their faces when we did that!"
"Of course he didn't!" Sarge said happily. "He was too busy cowering under a table to see that their lives were flashing before their eyes."
"Think they'll be mad that we got them that bad?" Tucker asked.
"Probably, but at least now they really are a part of the upper crust." Sarge remarked. His eyes then rested on Applejack, who was covered from tail to muzzle in food. "Seems like I got you back good."
"Ah'll say." Applejack smiled, wiping the worst off her face with the table cloth.
"Don't mean to burst our little bubble of fun here, but who's going to be paying for that table?" Tex asked suddenly.
"Eh, they can write it off under insurance." Tucker shrugged.
"I don't think businesses are covered by what you guys did."
"Hey, you never know." Tucker laughed. "Tell you what, desserts my treat."
"How generous." Tex said sarcastically.
"I told you I'm on my own level of class." Tucker shrugged. "Now let's get the fuck out of here before someone comes in to yell at everyone."
"Who is responsible for this?" A voice shouted from the kitchen.
"That's our cue." Tucker said quickly, flying towards the exit. As he passed their waiters he reached under his wing, pulled out a small bag of bits and tossed it at them with his teeth. "That should cover our dessert."
"Uh, okay." The mare said with a shaky smile as the others trotted out the door. "Have a good night."
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A few lil' notes here. There may not be a chapter tomorrow because me and my friend are going to be looking for an apartment together for school, so not sure when I'll be able to write a full chapter tomorrow.
ALSO I am going to start doing PSAs. You know, bonus chapters about certain topics. They won't be full 1.3-1.5k chapters, but they'll be 500-1k long unless I get really into it, so depending on when I get home tomorrow I may do one.
So be on the lookout for the first installment that may or may not come out tomorrow; PSA #1 - Interspecies Relationships.
Im cool with no chapter tomorrow you have been putting up one a day you could take a break if needed.
PSAs sound interesting.
1007995 yeah
Caboose: "I stabbed a guy in the heart."
Ron Burgundy: I saw that. Caboose killed a guy!
Caboose: Yea, there were Ponies, and pastries on fire, and I killed a guy with a banana!
Ron Burgundy: I've been meaning to talk to you about that....
"The look on all their faces when we did that1"
I'm guessing the 1 should be an exclamation point?
I love how Church and Twilight act in this! Reminds me of the scene from Titanic where the two rich guys refuse the life vests and go down with the ship.
...171 chapters.
Am I reading an MLP fanfic or War And Peace here?
I-I can't even COMPREHEND what kind of- wait wait, lemme check the chapter lengths...
Ah, they're all just above 1000 words. Why? It seems like you can jam a couple of these together in a full chapter.
im fine with that
This situation reminds me of Rooster Teeth 150 podcast. When in doubt just wait it out.
1008098
Because I produce daily chapters, that's why.
But now the chapters are getting longer (1.3k-1.5k words instead of what it used to be, me aiming for just over 1k)
1008172
Ahh, so they're just daily things. You basing them off the episodes, or drawing out your own plot?
1008187
My own plot, doing adaptations aren't fun.
Someone has been watching Anchorman.
I was expecting Sarge to say "Whammy!"
1008197 This is one hell of a plot. Are you drawing out any particular line, or is it something like cartoons, where it's just a day-by-day thing, with some episodes stringing together to draw out a somewhat coherent plot?
1007897
i am waiting for that PSA mister
better food fight ever! xDD loved it xP its cool if theres no chapters tomarow your a hard worker at this story :3 hehe you can use one xP
1008222
About the first 100 chapters are small arcs (4-8 chapters per arc, bar one or two that reach about 12) like MLP, but ever since chapter 100 or so it has been a straight story and it will keep going for a while.
PSAs? FUCK YEAH!
1007897
no problem; take as much time as you need with these stories...also will we see long beard again?
May I suggest a PSA idea (You don't have to do it you don't feelike it will work or if you don't want to)
fallout equestria PSA!!!
lol this is soooo much like red vs blue. its an artform here. i wonder what it be like if the pnies whent into the halo world?
1008306
I don't consider fanfics to be a subject unless I talk about fanfics as a whole, which I will do.
I read this while playing the ultimate showdown of ultimate destiny!LOLs were had this night!
Anchorman joke! Loved it1
how long has it been scince they left the AI fragments
1007897 Is that a reference to meee?
1009142
Nope.
1009145 that statement brings up a question that i had a while back and are you planning on adding junior anytime in the story. also sorry if this has been asked before.
1009224
Please refer to the FAQ in the description.
This was a fun chapter to read
1009272 oh sorry lol
1007897 Good Luck Good Sir
"Yeah, I stabbed a guy in the heart." Caboose smiled.
Loved the Anchorman reference!!! This chapter had me laughing quite a bit!
Brilliant.. Love Church And Twilight's View On All This.
Also PSAs Cools.
awsome chapter as always
First,Wow I did not even know that Church HAD an on switch for his swag.
cool!!
Second, will PSA be completely original or base on the real ones?
1010253
Original.
1010260 Ok Thx
good luck with apartment hunting.
I can definitely see Canterlot nobility getting into a good food fight. They probably use cupcakes for duels.
Also, the image of Church and Twilight casually continuing dinner, while food is flung in all directions, occasionally grabbing a particularly tasty treat out of the air as it flies by, is hilarious.
PSA. Why you follow me PSA? I wanted to see those ODSTs get destroyed so badly on Monday.
"I'm going to enjoy my meal." Church said with a smile, sitting back down. "Care to join me?"
Church, you just got 20% cooler in ten seconds flat.
"least now they really are a part of the upper crust." I see what he did there,
a new sargism has been made
Anchorman Reference for the win!
Oh God This chapter made me laugh so hard.
Welp, it was referenced (I think) in the story and I just love to jump on chances like this!
i.qkme.me/3p3m40.jpg
1008098
It's called the James Patterson technique.
You make short chapters wih cliffhangers to encourage people to read more.
Wow,
that really got outta hand fast..
Love the "that escalated quickly" thing and the "ya I stabbed a guy in the heart" jokes
death by banana *nods and says yes Yes
"Yeah. I stabed someone in the heart."
Me: Wait what *reads rest of dialouge* oh. *laughs heavily*
Twilight slowly opened her eyes to see Tucker spinning above a table, forelegs spread to his side, cutting the large, pastry filled table into bits with his electric blade.
And now Tucker's a Beyblade.