Beating Around The Bush
After the five little ponies collected themselves they decided it would be best to get back to the clubhouse to plan out the rest of the day. Church and Twilight on the other hand already knew what they were going to do, so they brought Eta and iota back into the library and sat them at the table with Tex and Spike.
"So what are you going to do with them?" Spike asked, looking into the blue pegasus's eyes. When it turned it's head to look back, it's eyes felt devoid of life so Spike looked away in an instant.
"First things first; they're going to Rarity's to get some other clothing to cover up their lack of marks. As long as they stay quiet, we can play it off like they do silent plays or the like." Twilight said and the pair looked at each other with slightly bemused smirks.
"You know, I was just thinking; why didn't they get the Cutie marks that the statues had?" Church asked curiously. "They took over some apparently memorable ponies, so they must have had their marks, right? And please, don't just say "magic"."
"The boy is learning." The Necronomicon boomed, which drove Church to give him the usual glare of pure contempt.
"I'm not one hundred percent sure." Twilight said honestly, using her magic to spin the Necronomicon to face the kitchen.
"Just take a stab in the dark."
"Your guess is as good as mine." Twilight shrugged, then sighed when Church rolled his eyes. "I guess since they're new souls in the bodies it wiped the slate so to speak."
"Good enough for me." Church nodded satisfyingly. "Tex and I will bring them to Rarity's and-"
"Why not just get Twilight? She'd probably be a hell of a lot more useful than me if it comes to holding them down."
"Church, I appreciate that you're worried about me as a friend, but just think about it. If they learn how to take to the skies then Tex won't be able to help past five feet." Twilight said in a near silent whisper. "Besides, I kind of want to see if Rarity cooked up any nice dresses. I'd love to see her take on pre-Celestial clothing. Whenever she gets a theme, she always recreates pieces with startling accuracy, but with her own unique spins. And-"
"Okay, sure, fine, whatever." Church sighed. "I doubt they'll do anything though."
"Great. Twilight, mind if I grab an apple from the kitchen?" Tex asked, already getting out of her chair.
"Of course. Come on, Spike." Twilight said, kneeling on the ground for Spike to jump on. Once he did, she began walking towards the door.
"You heard her." Church said, tilting his head forward to escort the pair out.
Eta and Iota shared a small glance with each other and nodded, then walked out the door. Satisfied they were cooperating, Church walked after them, slightly more relaxed. Tex walked back into the room with a small basket of apples in her mouth.
"Hey, can you give me an apple?" The Necronomicon asked when he saw her grab one.
"Pretty sure you can't eat food." Tex said as she bit her apple in half.
"You know, you could at least try to humor me..."
"Yeah, I'm not really the humoring kind of girl."
"Shame." The Necronomicon huffed, then glanced at her seriously. "You know, I believe I've mentioned this before, but what does Church see in you?
"What do you mean?"
"I've seen practically no redeeming qualities in you. Church isn't exactly the nicest pony around, but you're mean, your talent is hurting others and you didn't give me an apple.""
"Long story." Tex said quietly, tossing the apple core into a waste bucket. "Y'know what? I should probably catch up with them. There's no reason for me not to go. You never know when you'll need some extra help, do you?"
The Necronomicon tried to shake his head as Tex trotted out of the library and set off after the others. The Necronomicon glanced at the small bucket of apples and tried to somehow hop over to it. All he managed to do, however, was fall on his cover.
"Nobody sides with Ol' Necky." The Necronomicon sighed from his spot.
Twilight and Spike walked in front of the docile prisoners while Church kept to the back to keep his eyes on them as they made their way to the Carousel Boutique, being sure to avoid any ponies. When they were halfway there, Eta and Iota stopped and looked up at the sky. Spike tugged on Twilight's mane to tell her to turn around, but Church was already walking towards them. Church then yelped and jumped to the side when a group of objects fell into a nearby bush with a loud crash. Twilight went up to the bush to investigate the items, but Eta and Iota already shifted towards the bush before she did. Eta poked their head into the bush and fell back and muffled something when a large pink thing latched onto it's face.
"Heya, Twilight!" Pinkie said to Twilight as Eta shook the pink menace off of it's head. After three seconds of shaking, Pinkie shot off and did a triple somersault and landed on all four hooves. "How's it going?"
"I'm doing fine." Twilight said, noticing a rather ornate crown on her head. Before Twilight could ask, Caboose jumped out of the bush with Gummy clamped onto his tail, smooth cape on his back and a tiara on his head.
"Hello!" Caboose greeted happily.
"I'm probably going to regret asking this, but what's with the crowns?" Church muttered.
"Oh, that!" Pinkie giggled as she adjusted her shiny crown.
"I am a queen!" Caboose said loudly.
"Uh, whose queen?" Church asked seriously.
"Why, the aliens of course!" Pinkie laughed, then began staring up at the sky. "Thanks for the ride, fellas! Remember that parties are the most nutritious part of a balanced life!"
A series of lights flashed down from space and onto Pinkie and she giggled. The sound of thunder then came from the source of the lights, and the lights vanished in an instant. Church gawped in disbelief. He then remembered that more fucked up shit has happened involving aliens, so he decided not to question it.
"So who are they?" Pinkie asked, tilting her head as she stared at one pegasus pick up the other.
"They're Eta and Iota, listen, we don't have time for-"
"I will call them Wiggles and Waggles!" Caboose boomed, throwing either of his forelegs around their necks.
"Caboose, please, I'm not going to hurt your brain by trying to make you recall whatever the hell it was you were doing, so the least you can do is try to not hurt my brain by being annoying right now." Church snapped, making Caboose sink to the ground. "Against my better judgement I'm letting Twilight come with me, and I'm still not sure if those two did anything to her and I don't want anything to happen that will trigger some shit in her brain."
"Church, they're out now, I'm fine." Twilight said, laying her right hoof on his back to calm him down.
"But we have to play it safe." Church said matter-of-factly. He turned to Caboose and smiled weakly. "Hey, think you and Pinkie can do something for me?"
"What about Gummy?" Caboose whimpered.
"Well obviously Gummy too. I just felt that he was a given." Church said with wide-eyed sarcasm.
"Right, sorry." Caboose said, slapping his head as if the answer was obvious. "How do you want me to help?"
"No, not help!" Church said quickly, nearly tackling Caboose to the ground. "Just a favor."
"Okay, what is the flavor? Is it strawberry?"
"Pinkie, can you take Caboose and catch up with the Crusaders or whatever they call themselves?" Church groaned, rubbing his neck slowly. "Last I heard, they were hungry and could use some treats."
"That is a great idea! I haven't cooked in weeks! Well, not in Equestia anyways." Pinkie giggled and reached into a bush. She read Church's reaction to her movements and tutted. "Don't worry, Churchy! I'm not using a cannon to get there this time. I'm just getting my day planner!"
"Thank god."
"Let's see here...go to space with Caboose and Gummy? Check. Land in a bush? Uh-huh. Make Church nervous about my actions? Yup."
"Why is she trying to make me nervous?" Church asked, staring at Twilight.
"Better make that a double yup." Pinkie mumbled, scratching out the previous yup. She then threw it back into the bush and grabbed a small pepper shaker. Before Church could ask what it was going to be used for, she tapped some pepper onto her nose and sneezed, making her flank hit Caboose, sending them shooting towards Sweet Apple Acres. "See you guys around!"
"God, she's strange." Church said quietly. Eta and Iota nodded in agreement.
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....me gusta. now make Moar
Ha! Poor Church, always dealing with some odd shit.
At first I was WTF
then i remembered its Pinkie Pie
Will Ol' Necky get a spin-off that chronicles his relationship with Daring Do, and the fallout after he discovers Daring Do's affair with another Daring Do book?
We require more Theta.
...
I'd make an image about that but I'm on an iPod.
Updated [x]
Pinkie and Caboose back [x]
Strange events in the next few chapters [ ]
Oh Celestia, I hope Caboose and Pinkie didn't do anything to endanger Equestria
1383765 its caboose. shits already happenening
caboose gets smacked by a flank so hard he flies to sweet apple acres.
that would be an....interesting experience
I wonder what will happen next? The crusaders get a visit from Pinkie and she does her weird Pinkie stuff? Or Church and Twilight take Eta and Iota to Rarity's? If the latter: Poor poor Simmons.
I am so lost...
Nobody sides with Ol' Necky.
*snort*
I wonder if those aliens had the ability to revive the dead just like tucker's did... food for thought if you want to bring back Carolina.
Poor Necky
Finally... more Caboose.
Seriously. This story needs more Caboose-ishness.
ah yes i've missed those two, it's nice having them back :D
i might like eta and iota. let's see where they go.
p.s. is meta going to show up at any point?
1384631
[youtube=NPQVrjnC1jo]
1384633
I. UNDERSTAND. EVERYTHING!
Will we find out what happened on the 'other line'?
WAT
>found this yesterday
"Oh hey, an RvB Crossover fic! I've been waiting for one of these!"
>295k words long, incomplete
Holy sh-
Well, time to get reading.
1383749 Self-cest?
Needs more sex jokes. Kicking Griff's ass. And tucker failing with Rainbow. And a time line detailing. Caboose and Pinkie's alien rule
1383762 tucker and dash do it [ ]
"Why not just get Twilight?"
You mean Tex?
1386805
Tex is the one saying "Why not just get Twilight?" after Church said he and Tex were going to bring Eta and Iota over to Rarity's.
Since the new episode gave church back all his memories are you gonna bring that to the story? if so i recommend digging up Carolinas corpse for the dog tag and a texXchurch story lol. if not the forget what i said.
1386818 Ah, I see, thanks.
He then remembered that more fucked up shit has happened involving aliens, so he decided not to question it. Heh literally BOW CHICKA BOW WOW
Dude ya have to give necky a break sometime...
he gonna go insane
1392864 Tucker is an alien's baby-mama. Hence Junior.
........... I... Fuckin'... hate... You... Pinkie Pie...
hehehe, crunchbite.....
2830501 why ;_; shes pone D:
Actually a goal for my winter break was to understand pinkie... I failed sadly... I don't know why I bothered. To tell the truth she came to visit me. I'm not kidding, caboose was there and everything!
5472740 Next time, just take on something a little more... possible. I mean, I still don't understand women in general.