TWhere's Spike?! Or: Spike Is Missing!!
MLP: FiM
Comedy
Mystery
Random
Set during... I dunno, the hiatus between S5 and S6, this story is all about Spike going missing and a desperate Twilight trying to find him. Starlight turns up for some reason. Not as exciting as it sounds, but hopefully funnier.
Twilight
Spike
Starlight Glimmer
deadpansnarker · 1.3k words · 29 1 · 307 views
TAround The World With Six Mares (And A Dragon)
MLP: FiM
Adventure
Drama
Mystery
The day after Twilight's inauguration, she doesn't wake up in Canterlot castle... but in a cage. On Earth. And the rest of her friends aren't much better off either. But can they find each other again, and figure out what the Celestia is going on?
Fluttershy
Twilight
Rainbow Dash
Spike
Main 6
deadpansnarker · 3.3k words · 47 4 · 1.1k views
TIt's Always Sunny In Equestria
MLP: FiM
Adventure
Comedy
Mystery
A cynical brony watched the new G5 movie and shockingly hates it, especially the main protagonist. But next thing he knows, he finds himself inside the film himself, right at the start. As guess which despised character? The clue's in the title...
Profanity
Human
Main 6
Hitch Trailblazer
Izzy Moonbow
Sunny Starscout
Zipp
deadpansnarker · 3.2k words · 88 9 · 2k views
EA Homecoming To Remember
MLP: FiM
Comedy
Slice of Life
Just before becoming a Princess but after the events of Magical Mystery Cure, alicorn Twilight arrives in Canterlot to tell her parents the big news. Their reaction however isn't quite what she expected..
Alt. Universe
Twilight
Twilight Velvet
Night Light
deadpansnarker · 1.3k words · 271 16 · 4.6k views
TTwilight's Diamond Daughter
MLP: FiM
Drama
Sad
Slice of Life
After hearing dreadful tales of Diamond Tiara's less-than-ideal home life, A newly-crowned Twilight decides to offer her a whole new start. But will Diamond be happy with Twilight, or will her real parents get their act together at long last?
Twilight
Spike
Diamond Tiara
Silver Spoon
Main 6
deadpansnarker · 28k words · 209 14 · 3.8k views
TThe Alicorn Next Door
MLP: FiM
Comedy
Picture the scene: You've just watched the final episode of your favourite show. Then just as you're getting ready to move on with your life, a van pulls up outside.. and you have a new equine neighbour. How do you react? Hopefully not like this guy.
Human
Twilight
Spike
Main 6
deadpansnarker · 3.6k words · 50 5 · 1.7k views
ETwilight's Fairytale Fiasco
MLP: FiM
Adventure
Comedy
Mystery
After her long journey to become Princess of all Equestria, Twilight expected a fairytale ending... just not quite like this. She wakes up the day after her coronation in a strange new world with a new identity... and this is just the start.
Twilight
Spike
Main 6
Starlight Glimmer
Young Six
deadpansnarker · 3.9k words · 25 5 · 594 views
EThe Dog Who Can't Be Moved
MLP: FiM
Drama
Sad
Slice of Life
Applejack and Apple Bloom desperately want to get back to the farmhouse, but Winona won't be budged where she lays. What reason could this normally obedient dog have to be so... disobedient?
Applejack
Apple Bloom
Winona
deadpansnarker · 1.6k words · 100 3 · 1.8k views
EA Diamond Reflects
MLP: FiM
Comedy
Slice of Life
A newly-reformed Diamond Tiara reflects on her fresh outlook after the events of 'Crusaders Of The Lost Mark', and makes some big decisions about her future. Written to commemorate the fifth anniversary of my favourite episode.
Diamond Tiara
Silver Spoon
CMCs
Filthy Rich
Spoiled Rich
deadpansnarker · 1.5k words · 38 2 · 1k views
TThe Return Of Cozy Glow's Parents
MLP: FiM
Drama
Sad
Cozy Glow's mother and father return from a long trip just before Twilight's coronation, and are understandably unhappy at being parents to a statue. Where have they been all this time, though? And how did their daughter turn out the way she did?
Twilight
Spike
Main 6
Cozy Glow
deadpansnarker · 11k words · 125 10 · 3.6k views
TThe Emancipation of Twilight Sparkle
MLP: FiM
Drama
Slice of Life
The power exchange between Twilight and the sisters is about to be completed. Then, thanks to an ancient proclamation, things hit a snag. How will Twilight feel about this imposition on her non-existent love life?
Alt. Universe
Twilight
Spike
Celestia
Luna
Main 6
deadpansnarker · 2.9k words · 36 4 · 1.4k views
TTwo Alicorns Naked In A Hot Tub
MLP: FiM
Comedy
Slice of Life
After putting up with Celestia's nonsense earlier, Twilight hopes to relax and unwind in the palace bath alone. Not if Luna has anything to say about it, she won't. The day is about to get even more messed up.....
Twilight
Celestia
Luna
deadpansnarker · 1.8k words · 97 3 · 1.8k views
EMagical Mystery Molt
MLP: FiM
Comedy
In an alternative universe, Spike's transformation went a little... differently. One where there were less princesses and singing, and a big heaping dollop of sarcasm.
Alt. Universe
Twilight
Spike
Celestia
Main 6
deadpansnarker · 2.1k words · 79 9 · 1.9k views
ECozy Glow Is Turned Into A Chess Piece
MLP: FiM
Mystery
Random
Well, it's pretty self-explanatory. And if she doesn't know what's going on, imagine how you'll feel.
Cozy Glow
deadpansnarker · 1.2k words · 36 3 · 1.2k views
EGetting Cozy With Diamond
MLP: FiM
Drama
Sad
Slice of Life
You know Cozy Glow. Irredeemable villainess, insane filly, terrible hair. If all those things are true though, why has a certain reformed tiaraed bully suddenly made it her life's mission to help the petrified pest?
Twilight
Spike
Diamond Tiara
Spoiled Rich
Cozy Glow
deadpansnarker · 5.1k words · 62 4 · 1.3k views
TAltered Fates
MLP: FiM
Dark
Drama
Mystery
Twilight wakes up the day after her coronation, ready to rule. But uh... why is she in the Dragon Lands? Why is everyone calling her 'Ember'? And what's this about a year-long war between dragons and ponies...?
Alt. Universe
Twilight
Spike
Ember
Garble
Smolder
deadpansnarker · 1.6k words · 37 2 · 1.1k views
EWelcome To The New You!
MLP: FiM
Comedy
Slice of Life
When Twilight gets an advance preview of what she'll look like a few years after ascending the throne, she is not impressed. Can a certain special (soon to be not so) little guy help her see that the future might not all be that bad, after all?
Twilight
Spike
Celestia
Luna
deadpansnarker · 2.6k words · 67 4 · 2.4k views
EThe Cutie Mark Mares
MLP: FiM
Drama
Sad
Slice of Life
In an alternate ending of the episode 'Growing Up Is Hard To Do' , something goes wrong and the Crusaders are now stuck as adults. How will they deal with being children in older bodies, and how will their friends and relations react?
Alt. Universe
Twilight
Apple Bloom
Scootaloo
Sweetie Belle
Main 6
deadpansnarker · 6.7k words · 79 2 · 2.2k views

Why, hello there. If you're looking for fitfully updated chapter fics, comedic one-shots and shameless sarcasm, you've come to the right place.

If not, then stay anyway. You might just like it here.

Most popular stories 1-5

My Secret Daughter Starlight Glimmer's friends all find out she has became a mother long before any of them met her. But what'll happen when they make the discovery the long-lost filly isn't so 'lost' after all? What'll happens if... she just lives around the corner? by deadpansnarker 50,391 words · 684 · 55
A Mother's 'Love' Diamond Tiara finds out the consequences of her actions against Spoiled Rich after she stood up to her in front of the entire school. Disgraced, her precious tiara taken away...Then, somepony knocks on her door late at night, and everything changes. by deadpansnarker 170,626 words · 658 · 37
My Life As A Psychopathic Nine Year Old Filly A Cozy Glow-hating brony is fooled by the nefarious filly herself into switching bodies, now he's the one locked in Tartarus while she's causing havoc in his world. Uh-oh. Also, nopony believes him... because he's Cozy Glow. Makes perfect sense. by deadpansnarker 34,586 words · 515 · 55
Diamond Tiara's Shock Announcement Diamond Tiara has something to say to her entire family... and they're not going to be too happy about it. Especially a certain female parent of hers... by deadpansnarker 2,483 words · 492 · 23
Twilight Sparkle vs Ponyville Princess Twilight Sparkle wakes up early one morning, stretches, then decides to destroy Ponyville. As you do. by deadpansnarker 1,632 words · 477 · 18

Most popular stories 6-10

"Did you really expect me not to notice?!" In the aftermath of 'All Bottled Up', Starlight and Trixie think they've got off scot-free. Aha, but they reckoned without the keen observational skills of one Twilight Sparkle, and what followed is now documented here for posterity. by deadpansnarker 1,202 words · 327 · 29
Scootaloo's Aunts Attend Family Appreciation Day It's Family Appreciation Day once again, and Scootaloo's aunts/parents are making their long awaited debut. Unfortunately, their arrival coincides with Filthy and Spoiled Rich's presentation and, well... by deadpansnarker 3,827 words · 300 · 19
A Homecoming To Remember Just before becoming a Princess but after the events of Magical Mystery Cure, alicorn Twilight arrives in Canterlot to tell her parents the big news. Their reaction however isn't quite what she expected.. by deadpansnarker 1,321 words · 271 · 16
Diamond Tiara's Second Shock Announcement: Better Luck This Time Diamond Tiara had something very important to tell her family, but it didn't quite work out. Undeterred, she decides to try again with renewed determination... it can't all go wrong again, right? Right?! by deadpansnarker 2,764 words · 261 · 5

Most popular stories 11-15

Power Grab Celestia is totally exhausted working hard day in day out, and eventually decides to use magic to get herself some much-needed rest. The spell she uses is a mite too powerful though, and isn't she in for a shock when she wakes up.... by deadpansnarker 1,705 words · 246 · 11
Twilight's Second Life Twilight Sparkle wakes up one morning, to find she's living with her family and is a filly again. She's not in Canterlot but in Ponyville though, and that's just the beginning of the changes. Like her new school, and the identity of the Headmare... by deadpansnarker 9,477 words · 233 · 13
Spoiled Milk Returns After an unfortunate accident, Spoiled Rich wakes up thinking she's her old self before her marriage to Filthy, and boy isn't she different. The whole town is shaken up in the process, and Diamond is about to uncover some long lost family secrets... by deadpansnarker 23,105 words · 232 · 8
Diamond Tiara's Shock Announcement: Third Time's The Charm After Diamond Tiara's first two experiences delivering big news to her parents, you'd think that'll be it. But, nope... she has yet another bombshell to drop, and this time Spoiled Rich isn't going to take it lying down. by deadpansnarker 3,480 words · 227 · 9
Twilight's Diamond Daughter After hearing dreadful tales of Diamond Tiara's less-than-ideal home life, A newly-crowned Twilight decides to offer her a whole new start. But will Diamond be happy with Twilight, or will her real parents get their act together at long last? by deadpansnarker 27,739 words · 209 · 14

Top Favourites 1-5

Skin of Diamond, Heart of Glass Apple Bloom's perception of Diamond Tiara is challenged by Quillery 7,466 words · 258 · 1
We Can Do This Forever Twilight Sparkle and Starlight Glimmer are evenly-matched. Every time Twilight tries to stop Starlight's plan, she fails. That means Starlight wins, right? by Empirical Deduction 15,073 words · 1,278 · 20
Breaking Out Diamond Tiara has a breakdown after what happened in Family Appreciation Day. by BlackM 4,992 words · 174 · 3
Apple Bloom and Diamond Tiara: The Reason For The Feud The Apples and the Riches have had a good relationship for a few generations, up until Apple Bloom and Diamond Tiara. What is it about Apple Bloom that makes Diamond Tiara so mad, and can they ever reconcile their differences? by Never2muchpinkie 33,080 words · 84 · 1
Snipping a Diamond Diamond Tiara has had the worst night of her life, but then Snips appeared... by Starwind Dood 12,605 words · 142 · 4

Probably. I'm a pretty fickle person. Though No 1 is a cert.

Top Favourites 6-10

One Word Cheerilee repremands Diamond Tiara in the worst possible way. by BronyWriter 4,531 words · 1,405 · 29
A Diamond Comes Between Friendship? Apple Bloom and Scootaloo have both fallen for Diamond Tiara, and are both intent on winning her affections. by Yukito 69,664 words · 226 · 11
The Pony I Wanna Be Diamond Tiara has been mean for so long that looking back on her life now that she has changed fills her with such regret, that she decides to do something about it. by DragonShadow 2,013 words · 132 · 2
Alula and Diamond Tiara's Adventures in Romance The adventures of the cutest couple in Ponyville Elementary School by Yukito 57,828 words · 271 · 8
Closing Time After being cheated into selling her tomatoes at a lower price by a certain pink pony, Roma's afternoon does nothing but go downhill. by MalWinters 4,719 words · 105 · 2

Top Favourites 11-15

The Diamond Cutter She’s a rich filly. He’s a poor colt. What happens when Diamond Tiara accepts a dare to take Snips to the Sadie Hoofkins Dance? by Nova Force 28,643 words · 72 · 1
Dear Idiot After the gala, Princess Celestia sends Blueblood a letter to "explain" a few things... by The Descendant 2,809 words · 1,731 · 43
To Start a Fire A few months after his "redemption," Luna challenges Discord to give up chaos for good and truly become a hero. It doesn't go well. by Dubs Rewatcher 5,289 words · 66 · 2
Discord of Tomorrow After Discord failed to break up Twilight's friendships, he decides to trade places with a future Discord where the Elements would no longer exist. A future where, unknown to him, Discord has been reformed... by ChaoticConduct 9,935 words · 573 · 5
Diamond Tiara's Little Sister Diamond Tiara gains a little sister, and she's not happy about it. by AliceA020 2,173 words · 77 · 1

Jun

9th

2023

SHAMELESS PLUG ALERT: Can everyone who hasn't seen it yet, PLEASE take time out of their busy lives to read... · 5:10am Yesterday

My latest fic, Where is Spike?! Or: Spike Is Missing!!

If you 'get' my style of humour, or you like random stories stories where NOTHING is as it seems, you'll (probably) like this. At a piddling 1330 words, it surely wouldn't take much effort for you to give it a go. Read it on the toilet, or something.

Also, in case I forgot to mention this... it WILL make your life better!!*

Report deadpansnarker · 38 views ·

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