"We wear the mask that grins and lies, It hides our cheeks and shades our eyes."
— Paul Laurence Dunbar

It started as a normal Equestrian morning, but doesn't it always? The princesses are frightened, and in Ponyville, a creature from a forgotten race walks into town. His kind hasn't been seen in over a thousand years, but even then he's still far from what he appears to be.

Arc 1: The First Day

Author's Note: Hey guys! This is my first story, so constructive criticism is more than welcome. I'll take this moment to say that I own nothing but my main character, the plot, and a few surprises which will appear later. All other characters and linked music are NOT mine. A word on music. At times I might offer two links to a song. The first is the OFFICIAL version, the second is the closest approximation to how I feel it is sung in the story. Just warning you, because I know some people hate covers. This story is rated teen for occasional language, implied sex, and gruesome imagery (mostly late in the story and in flashbacks). Now with technical out of the way, I wish you all happy reading, and I hope you have fun.

Edit: Bug the writer! He writes faster when you do.

This is pretty much a self-insert, mostly done for comedic purposes.
After a mishap with an invention of mine, a friend and I find ourselves in the magical land of Equestria. How will the peaceful land of Equestria handle the influx of two humans? Will Jay and I ever find a way back home? Will anyone give this story a fair shot? Read and find out.
Things that actually involve MLP:FiM begin in the second chapter.

Anonymous Unknown the Human(You) is stuck working a dead end job day in and day out. Your life is so boring the only thing you do is eat, work, and sleep. But one fateful night Discord, The God of Chaos, visits Earth. When he comes across you he offers you an escape, one that you cannot refuse. When you are sent to Equestria you come to find out that Discord rules all and his reign, along with the antics of his daughters Screwball and Eris, has left a chaotic mess in their wake. You are forced into living here under the premise of making friends with ponies.

Why does Discord wish for you to befriend equines?
Why did he choose you of all the other humans out there?
How many friends will you make?
Why are the ponies he introduces you to gray and hostile?

Edited by: Detective Pingles http://www.fimfiction.net/user/DetectivePingles

This story is a sequel to Golden Grace, Headless Headaches

Okay, SO, after stopping Omega and saving Equestria from whatever he had planned, along with Measured from certain death, I kinda, sorta, maybe used up a bit too much of my power.
There's no 'maybe' about it, you did.
And Measured, Twilight, and I are going to do some tests to see how bad it is.
Once you stop flinching at the very mention of Twilight's name.
First things first, though. Someone get me away from Cel, she's gone bananas!

Greetings weary traveler/bored reader. Let me regale you with my tale. The tale of a mere mortal, with nothing particularly special to his name, brought to a magical land of dragons, minotaurs, griffins, and of course ponies. But he came as no mere human. He came as the epic warrior, the manliest of swordsmen, that most dashing of multiverse travelers, the mighty Gilgamesh! What adventures will this powerful and magnificent warrior find in his travels? HELL IF I KNOW! LET'S STRAP IN AND SEE WHERE THIS GOES!

Looking for cover art if anyone's interested.

Crossovers with:
The life and times of Xante, Baron of the Frozen Wastelands, First among Liches, Lord of the Dead, and Fabulous Rainbow Magic User

Golden Graces, Headless Headaches

I Will Hunt You Down

A Thousand Tortured Souls Scream My Name

Gravity of the Situation

Land of Friendship and Magic

And Then There Were 10… Er… 67

Son of Invention

Ten Against One

Time Ticks On

Let's Just Say That Umbra Really Needs to Put a Lock On His Diary

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May 25, 2014: I GOT FEATURED! HOLY CRAP THANK YOU SO MUCH!

This story is a sequel to Headless, not Heartless

Okay, taking it from the top.
Hi, I'm Auric Fulcrum, also known as Frank DeFontaine. For about 1,500 years, I wasn't alive. I instead inhabited my Dullahan costume as a spirit because of my sword, which also brought me to Equestria. Once I got here, after a few years of back and forth, Sunbutt imprisoned me because of a minor misunderstanding.
I heard that!
You were meant to!
Anyways, once I got out, I learned that the Wise One was coming to this reality, so I did what came natural to me.
I sought out the power of the Golden Sun and used it to defeat him so utterly I would never have to worry about him again.
Problem was, the energies that bound me together and the power of the Sun conflicted, so my armor fell apart. And without the armor, I was unbound, unfocused.
I came to a week later in the same basement I had been imprisoned, in my old body, but with a few...upgrades. Like Alchemy being a Thing I can Do.
Now that I'm alive again, my to-do list is radically different, but no less daunting.
For starters, how am I supposed to stop a mountain from sinking into the earth?!

This story is a sequel to Wake up. See This. What do? (Comment driven story)

This story is driven entirely by user comments. Whatever you say. I will make it happen.
(Now with new cover image by Blazewings thunder)

Part 2 of the epic comment driven story Wake up. See this. What do?
(This story continues directly where that one left off with all continuity preserved, so if you don't read that one first, you are going to be lost. This is still a self contained story, so you don't absolutely NEED to read that one first, but it is highly reccomended. Don't worry, it goes quickly.)

The adventures of the human known as Jason Morgan continue as he must take on the most dangerous adversary Equestria has ever faced by far, and soon finds himself locked in a conflict fighting for not only the inhabitants of his world, but for himself as well.

And as it has always been, the question remains:

What do you do?

Updated on Mondays.

Full Cast and Crew:
Author: RazortheAwesome
Co-author/Brainstorming: DaedaltheusXIV
Editor: Kiro0613
Title card artist: Blazewings thunder
Latin Translator: That Pegasus Over There

Authors note:
All of these chapters are written on the day they are posted. Also, I do read every single comment you all post. So yeah...

Sister stories:
Everfree Survival by Hrafn
Wake Up With A Hangover. Have Morning Wood. See This. What The Hell Do You Do? by RainbowBob

The star system Omega Centauri was just another oddity on a map to scientists in the not too distant future. However when they found the star was orbiting an earth-sized, earth-like planet instead of a black hole as its motion had suggested, a mission was scrambled to investigate this most unusual of celestial behaviors.

Hamstrung by politics, and nearly crippled before it began, the 'Lone Ranger' mission was reduced to just one crew member and left to his own devices.

These are the logs of Arrow 18 and its lone commander. This information is classified TOP SECRET by the Global Space Agency.

Do NOT tell the princess.

So, I accepted an invitation from a first cousin, once removed. It seemed like a sweet deal at the time, I mean, there were these conventions I wanted to go and he so graciously offered me a place to stay! Alright, so I had to share a room with my brothers, but I had the first convention all for myself! Plenty of cash to spend, and my costume was really easy to make!

Naturally, I spent all of the money that didn't go into my costume on everything that caught my fancy.

I should have left that table alone.

Now? Now... I am not as mad at Celestia as I could have been, as I should have been, all things considered. I can't help but let it be smoke in the wind.

It's in my nature.

And she... she knew there was a chance it would happen.

I'm so sorry, Wind Whistler. It was my fault.

DJSkywalker has been contributing so much, I'm officially adding Dj as a co-author.