It wasn't two days later that I was in Canterlot, going through one of Celestia's other pet projects. While I liked the name Hangar Neighteen, the fact that no aircraft were housed within made me angrier than it should have. Celestia had forbidden the Elements from going to the Badlands, but Luna had volunteered to escort Chrysalis and I to our destination. Jay would be arriving shortly before we were to leave, but wouldn't actually be fighting Arachni's personal guard. That was a nice little rule Karapass had told me about, and it was just the kind of rule I liked.
The prospective Grand Matrons could only use equally-sized groups in combat to determine which broodmother would inherit the title, meaning I could fight Arachni's toughest guy and no one else had to risk their lives. Granted, she could have a dragon with her, and I am not the Dovahkiin by any means. Thankfully, armor was allowed for species that didn't have such natural protection, so Celestia was finding something for me to wear in the event I was fighting a baby Godzilla. This was probably going to be in the form of royal guard armor, but I never have looked good in gold. Silver, on the other hand, is an entirely different story.
I packed up by duffel bag with all the goodies I found, and it was worth the weight for all I snagged. Cables, batteries, even part of an old computer I just found gathering dust, anything and everything I could fit inside the bag went in. I have no idea what I was going to use the bits for, but I knew it would be handy at some point. Until then, the parts can gather dust elsewhere but still in easy reaching distance in the event I needed them. Applejack's barn had some open space as I recall.
The Hangar's door led into a castle hallway, completely different from the room's interior. Pocket dimensions were funky like that, but I had no time to dwell on such things as I made my way to the barracks. I needed to see Shining Armor about something important, and it unfortunately involved him and his family. The guards gave me and my pony-sized bag the right of way; none of them wanted anything to do with the trouble I was likely up to. I found the blue-maned stallion filing something away, his back was turned as I approached.
“Armor, I need a favor.” Calling someone by their last name was a habit of mine, females and Jay being the only real exception. Sadly, calling me by my surname hadn't caught on in Equestria, no thanks to my flute-playing friend’s continuous use of it.
“How in Equestria are you that quiet?” The captain bumped his head against his filing cabinet when he jumped at my voice. You'd think a guy like him would be dangerous to sneak up on, and you'd be right. I don't even want to know what he could do with those forcefields he makes. The young officer looked at me patiently. Remember when I said Jay and I were the youngest in our group? Well, Shining Armor was in the area of twenty-eight, give or take a year or two. Still, you'd be surprised how many ponies think Jay and I are in our fifties; they're not quite sure how long humans live, so the naturally assume it's a while. “Anyway, what do you need?”
“Listen, this is going to sound weird, but I need to borrow your wife for about a week.” I got the reaction I expected. The unicorn looked at me like I needed to be committed to a mental institution, just because he's right doesn't mean it's for the right reasons. It probably also had something to do with my new romance, because I could almost feel the displeasure he felt at Chrysalis and I coming back to Canterlot. “Relax, Luna's playing chaperone for our trip to the Badlands.”
“You're asking to take my wife to the very center of changeling activity?” Armor's sentence was more of a statement than a question. The captain looked like he was both angry and confused, much like the time I explained the structure of time to Twilight. But this was more about keeping a spouse safe rather than the troubles of academia. “Are you insane?”
“Yes, but that's neither here nor there.”
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“Cadence, good to see you again.” Chrysalis was very uncomfortable talking to the loving alicorn, if only because she felt awkward around her previous prisoner. The insectoid pony kicked at the ground as the pink mare acknowledged her.
“Oh, hello Chrysalis, glad to see you back in Canterlot.” While the wedding was still a sore subject, Cadence felt no ill-will towards the dethroned queen. If anything, the young alicorn felt bad for her. As the Princess of Love, she could only imagine how horrible it must have been for the changeling to lose her children; she certainly knew how terrible it felt to even think about something like that. But as much as the former babysitter thought about the queen as she approached, something seemed different about her, in a good way. “How have you been?”
“Just fine, how about you?” A small smile was permanently affixed to Chrysalis's mouth, tiny enough that many ponies would have missed it. A slight spring in her step and lilt in her voice alerted Cadence to the fact that something very nice had happened while the queen had been staying in ponyville. Put simply, the changeling was acting similar to how she'd been when taking the princess hostage.
“Great, but I think you've been enjoying yourself more than me.” At the very least, Chrysalis's stint in Ponyville had been less stressful than Cadenza’s time in Canterlot. The larger mare giggled at the thought, thinking there was no possible way for the Princess of Love to know what was going on. She was sadly disappointed to learn otherwise. “Does Taylor know you're seeing somepony? That's something you have to keep the inquisitor alerted to, you know.”
“Of course Taylor knows, it'd be awkward if he didn't.” Chrysalis had actually forgotten about that clause in her pardon. If she found a source of love, she had to report it in order for it to be managed at a low output, far below what would be needed to defeat the princesses or Elements. A small smile spread across the pink alicorn's features as understanding took hold of the changeling broodmother. “How did you figure out Taylor and I were together?”
“Trust me, Chrissy, I know these things.” Cadenza winked at the older magic user, a small chuckle escaped her as she thought about everything that led up to the present moment. Both members if the new couple would have killed somepony for even mentioning the possibility a month ago, yet here they were. “Now, let's go let my husband know I'll be in the Badlands for a few days.”
“Pony, you scare me sometimes.”
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“Luna, I trust you're going to enjoy your trip?” Celestia was actually very worried about Taylor and Chrysalis, and hoped her sister would be able to watch over them. Karapass had visited shortly before going to Ponyville and explained everything to the two princesses. The relatively young ruler had brought the rules and etiquette of the fight to the alicorns' attention, seemingly for Taylor's benefit. For some odd reason the Grand Matron had taken a shine to the teenager, something that was odd for such a creature. Having no need for social ties, the changeling hives were strangely active in their areas, and more often than not had the community's interests at heart.
“Of course, Tia, Taylor's not going to die on my watch.” Luna said that like killing the human would be easy, despite everything that had happened to him pointing to the exact opposite. In reality, the dark blue pony was looking forward to watching the Burned Man do battle, her previous entertainment of Jay and Blueblood being cut off by her sister. “We'll take the utmost care not to harm any future relations with the changelings.”
“It would be very bad for Arachni to become Grand Matron; at least Chrysalis has a reason not to hate Equestria.” Cheating was out of the question, at least the sort of cheating that could be caught. The golden armor Celestia was having made for the teenager would hopefully prevent much of the damage that he could potentially take, but only f its enchantments would hold up against his nullifying presence. “When Jay arrives, you five need to board the train to Draconia.”
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“Oh Christ, I am so sorry!” Jay was trying to placate four fillies, quite the task for one such as himself. It didn't help that he was standing in the charred remains of the Cutie Mark Crusaders' clubhouse. It wasn't even his fault, just the stupid lamp the foals had broken earlier. They called the human to extinguish the resulting fire, if only because Applejack had no idea the children had an oil lamp in the wooden treehouse. The flautist noticed the group's unicorn having a slight twitch in her lower lip. “Sweetie, don't cry.”
“B-but our c-clubhouse is ruined!” The white filly was about to start squalling, a noise Jay had only heard once before, and he knew he wanted noting to do with it again. Tears welled in her eyes, and there was only one thing the human could do to avoid losing his hearing.
“If you don't cry, I'll take you all on an adventure!” This got the group's collective attention. Even Applebloom's cousin, Babs, seemed to be interested. As much as Jay hated the orange filly's accent, at least she hadn't felt the need to say much. But, there had to be the one member of the group that ruined it for everyone else.
“But Jay, won't Applejack be mad at us?” As much as the flautist liked the yellow pony, the goody two-shoes was too nice for her own good. Luckily, he had a solution for this.
“Shut up and get in my backpack.”
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Extra – You Gotta Shoot 'em in the Head
“Zombie!” Lyra was shouting as she used Taylor's revolver, despite being told they were technically still living humans, just terribly mutated. Being described as people that didn't have the good fortune to die as a puddle of liquifying tissues and soft bones, the two ponies only felt pain for their plight. That helped them kill them, only if it meant releasing them form eternal torment. One of the rotting men ran at the teal mare as she reloaded, only for its head to pop like a ripe melon. For someone that claimed to be nearsighted, Taylor was lethal with that rifle. “Trixie, look out!”
“I see it!” A sharp rock pierced the feral mutant's heart as the magician launched more stone projectiles, preferring natural solutions over machined weaponry. That was a lie, she just wanted to feel like a badass. One of the ghouls ran through the line, bypassing the mares and Jay as it ran towards the larger human, some sort of instinct compelling it to exit the hunting rifle's effective range. “Taylor, heading your way!”
An old, wooden butt slammed into the rotten mutant's face as the teen ducked under its clawed hands. With the .308 slung over his shoulder, Taylor was ready to fight the durable mutant at extremely close range. A right hook slammed into the ghoul's crooked jaw as it ripped into the young adult's shirt. Two large hands gripped the old creature's skeletal head as the southern gentleman brought his knee into the center of the ghoul's face. Taylor grabbed one of the abomination's arms and rotated it so the elbow faced skyward. The genius bruiser brought his own arm down on the joint, extending it far beyond anything it would normally face. The impact shattered the ulna and shoved the radius from its hold.
In that same second, a boot slammed into the unfortunate soul's chest. As the ghoul stumbled to right itself, a bullet blew through its skull. The walking corpse took a one step, then fell in death, finally achieving peace after an unknown amount of time. Jay's varmint rifle didn't even shake as he held it; killing a human may be difficult, but the person that ghoul once was had died a long time ago. Still, there was an exhausting atmosphere about the RepCon facility. Taylor chambered a new round, making sure to pocket the spent cartridge to reload later. The group's unofficial leader took a step towards the derelict building.
“Let's pay Bright a visit.”
LEVEL UP
Allotting Skill Points... Done
Allotting Perks... Done
Perks Added: Jay – Fortune Finder – Chance of finding caps in containers significantly increased. Cheapskate.
Taylor – Friend of the Night – Eyes quickly adapt to low-light conditions at night and indoors. Sneaky sneaky.
Trixie – Spec. Cannon – Unarmed attack replaced with a silent, high critical-chance energy blast. Your enemies just won't know where they went wrong!
Lyra – Anthropologist – 10% damage increase against humans, allows for special dialogue when dealing with hyper-intelligent apes. May or may not result in strange sitting posture.