And the Epic Begins
La la la la la la la la la la la la la la, la la la la la la la, la la la la la la la la la-Sweet Christ, I love this song!
You’d think after being frozen in stone for fifteen hundred years with nothing but your thoughts you’d get tired of a song, but nope! Some songs are just ear worms like that. I mean sure, its not like that’s the only song I thought about this last millennium and a half, there were plenty of other ear worms that I went back to, and some songs I just went back to make sure I remembered all the lyrics, but dear god do I love this one! And why wouldn’t I? It’s technically my song now.
Oh yeah, and before you ask, no I’m not in the Canterlot gardens. I’m in a nearby museum. Sure on the one hand, I don’t get much of a view, but at least I get well cleaned and there’s no bird shit I have to deal with. I bet Discord hates that so much.
Oh hey, I think I hear a tour group coming! GAZE UPON MY MIGHTY FORM!
“Come on class, we’ve got a lot to see!” said a stern yet gentle voice.
Wait a minute… I think I know that mare’s voice…
“Now this is another interesting exhibit, much like the one in the garden. Here we have the avatar of battle, Combat.”
OH SHIT, THAT’S CHERILEE! HOLY CRAP, THEN THAT MEANS-!
“Why’s he called that?” asked a familiar adorably squeaky voice.
IT’S THEM! IT’S THE CMC! HOLY SHIT! Wait a minute, that means I’m caught up with the show now, which means… HOLY CRAP, THIS IS “THE RETURN OF HARMONY” EPISODE! And if anyone- uh, anypony is going to get me out of here it’ll be the same three who were responsible for Discord getting out! COME ON YOU BEAUTIFUL FILLIES, GET ME OUTTA HERE!
“An what does ‘combat’ mean anyway?” Applebloom asked in her adorable little accent.
“It means ‘fighting’,” the teacher happily explained.
“Figures you wouldn’t know,” quipped a familiar condescending voice.
“An what’s that supposed ta mean!?”
“Now class, none of that! I don’t want to have to break up another fight like before!” Cherilee berated.
Yeah, put a sock in it Diamond Tiara, ya bitchy spoiled sack a shit.
“Sorry,” they both said, their ears drooping while they hung their heads.
Dear lord, even the bitch looks adorable. MY HEART ‘ASPLODE!
“So, just what kind of creature is that, Ms. Cherilee?” Sweetie Belle asked.
“Yeah, looks pretty strange,” Snails added.
“I think it looks pretty cool!”
Of course you would, Scoots. I mean, I took painstaking effort to make sure I had the most awesome pose possible when I got turned to stone. Back straight, head held high, one hand on my hip with the other extended in a thumbs up. Might not be the flashiest pose in my repertoire, but its classic badass.
“Nopony knows exactly what kind of creature Combat was, but he was incredibly powerful,” Cherilee continued.
Oh yeah, here we go. REGALE YOUR STUDENTS WITH MY MAGNIFICENCE!
“He hailed from a time long in the past before Equestria was at peace. The many countries and species warred with each other, trying to gain the most control over the land, when he appeared. He caused untold destruction to the lands, and was able to best the greatest of warriors from all kinds of armies. Entire cities and mountains were destroyed in his battles.”
Hey, you make it sound like I was trying to destroy all those things! I’m not evil I’m just… enthusiastic. Dammit Tia and Lulu, you did this on purpose, didn’t you?
“It’s said that Combat was so strong that it was only with the armies of the ponies, the griffons, and the minotaurs fighting together that they were able to stop him long enough for the Princesses to seal him away.”
“Whoa,” the class responded in awe.
Well, at least they kept that part right. Suddenly I feel like a trophy instead of a powerful enemy sealed away.
“Come on class, we’ve got more to see. Make sure not to fall behind!”
Wait, what? They’re leaving already!? NO! COME ON! LET ME OUT! LET ME OUT! LET ME- oh hey, the CMC’s still here. Come on, kiddies, I know you can do it!
“Wow. It’s pretty scary ta think there was a creature that powerful, huh?” Applebloom said, still looking at the armored statue in a mix of fear and respect.
“Ha! No biggie! I bet Rainbow Dash could take him down easy!” Scootaloo boasted.
“I don’t know, I think it would take all six of the Elements to stop him,” Sweetie said.
Even that might not do it.
“Huh?”
The three fillies looked around for the source of the voice, hoping they were just hearing things.
Hey kids, what time is it?
An audible cracked rang out and the three fillies turned to see a break along the statue's chest.
“Uh oh,” they all said.
Within seconds the crack expanded, encompassing the twelve hoof tall statue before it shattered in a blast of light. The three opened their eyes to see the figure with it’s arms raised.
“FREEDOM TIME!” it shouted before hopping down of its pedestal and bending down far enough to touch noses with the three fillies. “So you think the Elements of Harmony can beat me, huh?” Before they could respond it stood up straight with its hands on its hips. “CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.”
“This is so your fault, “ Scootaloo muttered to Sweetie.
“Me!?”
“But first, to reward you with what you deserve,” the warrior continued in a sinister voice.
The three fillies gulped and before they could even turn they were quickly scooped up into the figure’s arm and held to its chest. They all shivered as it pulled down the guard around the bottom of its face, showing off a sinister smile.
“Thank you. Thank you. Thank you,” it said, giving a quick kiss to their foreheads with each gratitude.
Before they could process what just happened the figure set them down.
“And now, THE DANCE OF FREEDOM!”
The three fillies looked on in utter confusion as the figure danced towards the entrance of the museum, shouting “FREEDOM, FREEDOM, FREEDOM, OI!” as it went.
Once it was out of sight Scootaloo said, “I won’t say anything if you won’t.”
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Pretty good, keep it up.
Finally a Gilgamesh fic
Also laughing my bucking head off
Which Gilgamesh out of interest? there were several versions if I remember my mythology right.
I was laughing through this whole chapter
It's got potential to be funny as hell, man, but you think you could lay off using so many references? Jesus. At least make them more subtle.
enough expository banter... LETS DANCE! FREEDOM FREEDOM FREEDOM OI!
4222582 the picture, it is the Final Fantasy version.
4222582 It's Final Fantasy's version of Gilghamesh, specifically his FF V incarnation… For the moment, at least.
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I did know it was final fantasy, just didn't know which one.
FF5? Hmmm..... Very well. I would have preferred FF12's version, but I shall observe you with interest. Very funny by the way!
I am intrigued..continue.
Oh, fuck yeah, Gilgamesh.
God I love him. One of my favourite final fantasy villians.
this chapter is MANY TIMES MANY kinds of hilarious
4224404 FFV? k, thanks! was also curious as to which one this guy was based off of
Gilgamesh in equestria. Final Fantasy and MLP. .....INSTANT LIKE AND FAVORITE FOR USING MY FAVORITE GAMING SERIES AND FAVORITE TV SHOW!
Way to Zoidberg!
Well first chapter about two paragraphs in and you already had a fav and follow from me, kudos you writing comedy maestro!
Newly acquired Fan,
Aerigim
And that's why gilgamesh is my FAVORITE!!! final fantasy charicter of all time.... GILGAMESH IS BEST PONY!
When he broke free and went all goofy, this started playing in my head:
It may be Steiner's theme from FF9, but it still fits his awkward behavior.
Me, AB, and Sweetiebelle: Agreed.
I normally wait until I've read the entire fic before favoriteing it, but I'm clicking the star now anyway.
Even if the rest of the fanfic is shit, it's worth it just to see Gilgamesh hug the CMCs and sing "FREEDOM, FREEDOM, FREEDOM, OI".
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Technically all the Gilgameshes in Final Fantasy are all the same guy. In FFV he worked for a villain named Exdeath. After many blunders worthy of Team Rocket, Exdeath banished Gilgamesh into the void between dimensions for his repeated failures. Since then Gilgamesh has traveled across many lands searching for adventure, rare weapons to add to his collection (as a running gag his weapons turn out to all be convincing fakes), and worthy challenges to test himself.
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Yes Gilgamesh is a delicious honey baked ham in all of his appearances.
Okay, that story is definitly better then it looked at first.
Did not know he went to the year 3000
... HA! That was fantastic! Gaah!
On man, first chapter and i'm already laughing myself sick!
Best beginning to a story. Ever.
Decided on a reread. Will point out blatant errors. There're a lot of issues with commas -- too many to deal with on an informal basis, so I'll leave most of those alone.
I LOVE HAM!! BALONEY HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! I like him hes silly.
THIS IS MORE LIKE IT!!!!!!
5750271 Awwww... I was thinking that he was FS/N Gilgamesh.
came here from ur crazy antics in son of invention
this is better then i hoped it would be IN ONLY THE FIRST CHAPTER
had me laughin like a manic
scared my dog away
... pussy
Bucking hilarious!!
The freedom dance is closer to this I think
So, I started reading this right after I hit play on a youtube video with "Clash on the Big Bridge" playing...and you know what? Totally worked. Also got me totally pumped to read this. CHALLENGE ACCEPTED
Dat MC...
media.giphy.com/media/qhURwEDavrGQE/giphy.gif
At least he retained his dignity.
What the hell is going on?
Whatever it is, you have my attention. 
This chapter is beautiful! XD
Oh my god, I love this story already!
Just the tip of the zoidberg
I have not felt this excited and happy in a while; and I just imagine the “good job” meme for his pose now.
*laughs so hard a coughing fit begins*
I like it already.
good idea
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same
One of the best first chapters love it