• Published 12th Apr 2014
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The Mighty Warrior of Epicness - shinigamisparda



A cosplayer is sent to Equestria as his outfit, Gilgamesh from Final Fantasy. Let his epic quest for fights and fun begin!

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And the Epic Begins

La la la la la la la la la la la la la la, la la la la la la la, la la la la la la la la la-Sweet Christ, I love this song!

You’d think after being frozen in stone for fifteen hundred years with nothing but your thoughts you’d get tired of a song, but nope! Some songs are just ear worms like that. I mean sure, its not like that’s the only song I thought about this last millennium and a half, there were plenty of other ear worms that I went back to, and some songs I just went back to make sure I remembered all the lyrics, but dear god do I love this one! And why wouldn’t I? It’s technically my song now.

Oh yeah, and before you ask, no I’m not in the Canterlot gardens. I’m in a nearby museum. Sure on the one hand, I don’t get much of a view, but at least I get well cleaned and there’s no bird shit I have to deal with. I bet Discord hates that so much.

Oh hey, I think I hear a tour group coming! GAZE UPON MY MIGHTY FORM!

“Come on class, we’ve got a lot to see!” said a stern yet gentle voice.

Wait a minute… I think I know that mare’s voice…

“Now this is another interesting exhibit, much like the one in the garden. Here we have the avatar of battle, Combat.”

OH SHIT, THAT’S CHERILEE! HOLY CRAP, THEN THAT MEANS-!

“Why’s he called that?” asked a familiar adorably squeaky voice.

IT’S THEM! IT’S THE CMC! HOLY SHIT! Wait a minute, that means I’m caught up with the show now, which means… HOLY CRAP, THIS IS “THE RETURN OF HARMONY” EPISODE! And if anyone- uh, anypony is going to get me out of here it’ll be the same three who were responsible for Discord getting out! COME ON YOU BEAUTIFUL FILLIES, GET ME OUTTA HERE!

“An what does ‘combat’ mean anyway?” Applebloom asked in her adorable little accent.

“It means ‘fighting’,” the teacher happily explained.

“Figures you wouldn’t know,” quipped a familiar condescending voice.

“An what’s that supposed ta mean!?”

“Now class, none of that! I don’t want to have to break up another fight like before!” Cherilee berated.

Yeah, put a sock in it Diamond Tiara, ya bitchy spoiled sack a shit.

“Sorry,” they both said, their ears drooping while they hung their heads.

Dear lord, even the bitch looks adorable. MY HEART ‘ASPLODE!

“So, just what kind of creature is that, Ms. Cherilee?” Sweetie Belle asked.

“Yeah, looks pretty strange,” Snails added.

“I think it looks pretty cool!”

Of course you would, Scoots. I mean, I took painstaking effort to make sure I had the most awesome pose possible when I got turned to stone. Back straight, head held high, one hand on my hip with the other extended in a thumbs up. Might not be the flashiest pose in my repertoire, but its classic badass.

“Nopony knows exactly what kind of creature Combat was, but he was incredibly powerful,” Cherilee continued.

Oh yeah, here we go. REGALE YOUR STUDENTS WITH MY MAGNIFICENCE!

“He hailed from a time long in the past before Equestria was at peace. The many countries and species warred with each other, trying to gain the most control over the land, when he appeared. He caused untold destruction to the lands, and was able to best the greatest of warriors from all kinds of armies. Entire cities and mountains were destroyed in his battles.”

Hey, you make it sound like I was trying to destroy all those things! I’m not evil I’m just… enthusiastic. Dammit Tia and Lulu, you did this on purpose, didn’t you?

“It’s said that Combat was so strong that it was only with the armies of the ponies, the griffons, and the minotaurs fighting together that they were able to stop him long enough for the Princesses to seal him away.”

“Whoa,” the class responded in awe.

Well, at least they kept that part right. Suddenly I feel like a trophy instead of a powerful enemy sealed away.

“Come on class, we’ve got more to see. Make sure not to fall behind!”

Wait, what? They’re leaving already!? NO! COME ON! LET ME OUT! LET ME OUT! LET ME- oh hey, the CMC’s still here. Come on, kiddies, I know you can do it!


“Wow. It’s pretty scary ta think there was a creature that powerful, huh?” Applebloom said, still looking at the armored statue in a mix of fear and respect.

“Ha! No biggie! I bet Rainbow Dash could take him down easy!” Scootaloo boasted.

“I don’t know, I think it would take all six of the Elements to stop him,” Sweetie said.

Even that might not do it.

“Huh?”

The three fillies looked around for the source of the voice, hoping they were just hearing things.

Hey kids, what time is it?

An audible cracked rang out and the three fillies turned to see a break along the statue's chest.

“Uh oh,” they all said.

Within seconds the crack expanded, encompassing the twelve hoof tall statue before it shattered in a blast of light. The three opened their eyes to see the figure with it’s arms raised.

“FREEDOM TIME!” it shouted before hopping down of its pedestal and bending down far enough to touch noses with the three fillies. “So you think the Elements of Harmony can beat me, huh?” Before they could respond it stood up straight with its hands on its hips. “CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.”

“This is so your fault, “ Scootaloo muttered to Sweetie.

“Me!?”

“But first, to reward you with what you deserve,” the warrior continued in a sinister voice.

The three fillies gulped and before they could even turn they were quickly scooped up into the figure’s arm and held to its chest. They all shivered as it pulled down the guard around the bottom of its face, showing off a sinister smile.

“Thank you. Thank you. Thank you,” it said, giving a quick kiss to their foreheads with each gratitude.

Before they could process what just happened the figure set them down.

“And now, THE DANCE OF FREEDOM!

The three fillies looked on in utter confusion as the figure danced towards the entrance of the museum, shouting “FREEDOM, FREEDOM, FREEDOM, OI!” as it went.

Once it was out of sight Scootaloo said, “I won’t say anything if you won’t.”

Author's Note:

So yeah, not a particularly long chapter, but I just wanted to get this set up before I continue. Stay with me kiddies, this should get a bit longer as we go, and hopefully better. I just hope you'll all stick with me and give me some ideas because this is the only fix I've ever started where I HAVE NO IDEA WHERE I'M GOING WITH THIS. So yeah, let's see what my crazy fingers come up with.