“Uhh…huff…damn it…” My frustrated grumblings echoed between the trees of Sweet Apple Acres as I pulled an over full wagon of apples behind me. Placing my hooves slowly in front of each other as I plod along in my new body that Twilight and Trixie had made for me.
“Come now Sugarcube, y’all can move fasta’ then tha’ can’t ya?” Applejack said with a smile as she trotted beside me.
“You’re the devil…AJ…evil incarnate.” I say between puffs of breath.
“And y’all are a lazy stallion, now git a move on, we only got one more wagon ta get back to the barn before ye’re debt is paid.”
“How does…manual labor…make up for scaring your sister?” I ask as I pull the load of apples up to the barn door.
“Well it means y’all are sorry for what you did and it shows that y’all are devoted to your apology.” She says while unloading apples with me.
“Curse you and your logic, making sense is no fair.” I grumble as I grab a couple of baskets with my tendrils and pile them in the corner of the barn.
Applejack chuckles while she sets a few more baskets next to my own. “Y’all have just gone soft after bein’ dead so long.”
“Hey! I’m a delicate flower and should be treated as such.” I say dramatically with a hoof held to my forehead.
“Sure ya are Sugarcube, sure ya are.”
“Well, maybe not a delicate flower but I am made out of clay now and I’m not entirely sure how much abuse this body can take.” I say as I hitch myself to the wagon again.
“Well, we’re almost done so you don’t need to worry abou’ that…we can see how much abuse y’all can take tonight anyway.”
“Wait, what’s going on now?”
“Oh, didn’t we tell ya? The crusaders are havin’ a sleepover and we’re goin’ to have you chaperone to make sure none of ‘em have nightmares.” She says with a grin.
I stare at her in horror. “I told you…you’re pure evil….pure, unadulterated evil.”
“Aww, now y’all are jus’ tryin’ to flatter me aren’t ya?” She says with a grin.
I just shake my head in frustration as we enter the orchard once again. After a sigh I thought about how it had come down to this.
When they had shown up at Lyra’s door yesterday I thought I was going to die…again. At least I only had to sit through an hour or so of scolding, mostly from Rarity and Applejack. Rainbow sat there trying not to laugh and Filthy Rich was rather understanding about it. He just asked that I come by the next day to apologize to Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon. Applejack and Rarity also told me I had to come and apologize properly to their sisters as well.
As they were finishing chewing me out, Trixie and Twilight showed up to give me their own earful about responsibility and thinking my actions through. I then spent the rest of the night locked in Twilights basement as she ran tests on me and by the morning I felt like a thoroughly abused piece of meat.
When I showed up at the farm today to atone for what I did the abuse continued, I was put to work immediately hauling apples. Though it was a nice discovery that I could get tired but that a couple of minutes of rest was enough to make me feel energetic again. But there was no way in hell that I was going to let Applejack know that.
“I see you got him working hard AJ.” I hear the scratchy voice of Rainbow call from above us as we pass under some apple trees.
“Rainbow ya varmint, are y’all takin’ a nap in my trees again?” Applejack accuses as we stop.
“Oh good god, are you here to torture me too? Please tell me I’m not helping you set up one of your stunts am I?” I groan as we pull up next to the last pile of baskets.
Rainbow flips out of one of the trees and lands with a small puff of dust. “Nah, we’re cool. I think what you did was awesome, those two brats needed some scaring.”
Applejack gives her a reproachful look. “Now Rainbow tha’ ain’t very nice, y’all know Filthy Rich is an old friend of the Apple Family.”
Rainbow shakes her head. “Don’t look at me like that, you know it’s true. Those two have been causing all sorts of trouble for the girls and needed to be put into their place, it was just bad luck that the Crusaders got caught in Spooky’s crossfire.”
While loading baskets with apples I decided to put in my two cents. “Yeah AJ, those two are definitely brats.” Applejack transfers her glare to me. “…but maybe I did go a little too far in trying to teach them a lesson.”
“That you did Spooky. Y’all should of just been plain honest with ‘em and told ‘em what they were doin’ was wrong.”
“Hey, I did tell them what they were doing was wrong…and I’m as honest as the day is long.” This of course would be about half the time around here since the sun is up for exactly twelve hours.
“Sure ya are Sugarcube, sure ya are.” Applejack says with a snort as we load the last of the apples.
Rainbow trots up next to me and Applejack as I begin hauling the wagon back to the barn. “So Rainbow, if you’re not here to torture me like Applebutt over here then what are you here for?”
“Oh, Rarity just asked me to make sure you make it over to the boutique after you were done over here. She said she has something ‘special’ planned for you.” She says with a grin.
I almost trip as I grimace. “Say Applejack…you, uh, you wouldn’t happen to have anything extra you would need done around here would you...please?”
Applejack chuckles, “Nah, I think we got everything covered Sugarcube.” We pull up to the barn and Applejack unhitches me. “Well why don’ you head on over to Rarity’s right now, I think I can take it from here.”
“NO! I mean let me help you unload the wagon at least.” I glower at Rainbow as she snickers at me.
“Oh no can do Spooky, can’t keep y’all to myself when Rarity’s in need of you.” Applejack says with a grin.
“I…umm…help?” I squeak as I look to Rainbow.
“Help you get to Rarity’s? Of course!” Rainbow says as she curls her forelegs under my arms and takes off in a gust of wind. I can barely make out Applejacks laughter over my own scream as we hurtle towards town.
We land in front of Rarity’s shop in less than a minute in a puff of dirt and leaves. I stand there in shock, my legs shaking underneath me as I continue screaming.
“Spooky…” Rainbow says in my ear.
I continue screaming.
“Spooky!”
I lock my legs to keep them from shaking but my scream continues.
“SPOOKY!”
I snap my mouth shut as I look back to see Rainbow is still attached to my back. Apparently my hair and my tail had wrapped around her body while we were mid flight and I had her in a death grip.
I give her a sheepish grin as I let her go and she flops onto the ground next to me.
She hip checks me as she walks towards Rarity’s front door. “Who’s the scaredy-pony now?” She asks.
“That would be you since I’m technically not a pony.” I say with a grin.
The front door of the Boutique suddenly opens and Rarity peeks out. She looks around her front yard before glancing back to Rainbow and me. “Where did the screaming filly go?”
To Rainbows credit she was able to stop herself from laughing for at least five seconds before she started rolling on the ground laughing her head off.
“Ouch…right in my masculinity.” I wince as I trot up to Rarity. “You wanted to see me Rarity?”
Rarity glances from Rainbow back to me with a small blush on her face. “Terribly sorry Spooky, anypony would have made the same mistake.”
“Yeah…sure, so what do you need me to do?” I ask with a sigh.
She tsk’s a few times as she trots around me. “Well I can’t have you do anything with as dirty as you are.” Rarity’s horn lights up and a string of her magic grabs hold of me and I find myself floating upside down in her magical grip. “Thank you Rainbow for fetching him for me.”
“No *gasp* problem Rarity. Hehe, filly…see ya later Rare’s.” Rainbow says as she takes flight and heads off in the direction of the farm.
“Goodbye, Rainbow. Now shall we get started darling?” Rarity says as she pulls me into the Boutique.
“Started with what?” I ask as I float upside down through her home.
“Why getting you squeaky clean of course.” She says as we enter into her spacious and well appointed bathroom that has a tub already filled to the brim with soap and water.
I struggle briefly as she floats me over a bathtub big enough to fit Celestia before she drops me into the strawberry scented suds. I sputter as I surface and I let out a manly squeak of fear as I see Rarity leering at me with various beauty products in her magical grasp.
“Now hold still darling, this shouldn’t take long at all.”
I back away from her until I run into the edge of the tub. “Can’t we talk about this?” I ask nervously.
“Of course we can talk about it darling, but that isn’t going to stop it from happening.” She says as a hair brush and washcloth descend like a pair of ravenous birds of prey.
Rarity begins brushing and scrubbing the dirt and grime from my coat with ferocity. “Oww…not so hard…ouch…hey, watch where you’re putting that washcloth…my head doesn’t bend that way…”
My grumbling protests go ignored by Rarity as she lathers on soaps and shampoos and then rinses me with a telekinetically held glob of water. “Hmm, this dirt is being very stubborn Spooky, not matter how hard I scrub there is still dirt coming off of you.”
“Well…I am made of clay right now….perhaps we should cut this short before you wash me away.” I say while trying to fend off a bottle of conditioner.
“Oh my, that simply will not do.” Rarity suddenly lifts me out of the tub and sets me down on bathroom floor. Before I can shake myself out I’m suddenly assaulted by fluffy purple towels from all directions.
“There, now don’t you feel much better?” Rarity asks with a grin and a flutter of her eyelashes.
“I feel like a drowned rat that was only partially resuscitated.” I grumble. “And I think you washed away my outer layer.” I say indicating the now brownish sludge filling the bathtub.
Rarity grins sheepishly as she tosses her towels into a laundry basket, “I am terribly sorry about that Spooky, at least now you look fresh and clean and ready to take on the world.”
“…great, can we get on with whatever you have planned for me?” I ask with a sigh.
Rarity lets out an excited giggle, “Of course Spooky, if you would be so kind as to follow me to my workroom.”
“So what do you need me for? Carrying heavy spools of cloth? Organizing your samples?” I ask as we make our way into the organized chaos that was Rarity’s workroom.
Rarity grins as she turns to face me, “I just need you to stand on the stage for me.”
“…you made me clothes didn’t you?” I deadpan.
“Of course, would you expect anything else?” Rarity says while batting her eyelashes at me.
I sigh as I hop up onto the platform. Rarity’s magic grabs a flexible tape measure which begins wrapping around me. “To tell you the truth darling, I’m not even that upset with you, this was just the perfect opportunity to get you into the store and make sure everything fits properly. Sweetie wasn’t terribly upset with the story that you told and Diamond and Silver do need some manners pounded into them.”
Another string of magic opens up one of her cabinets and pulls out what appear to be the top half of a two piece suit…that was pink.
“…you made me a pink suit?” I ask nonplussed.
“I made you a whole rainbow of suits darling. I’m especially proud of the forest green one; it will go lovely with your hair. Twilight had let me in on her little project and I had gotten measurements a few weeks ago. I just need to make a few adjustments.”
“So why are you just altering the pink one?”
“Well, when I was talking with Filthy Rich yesterday, Diamond overheard that I had made you this one and requested that you wear it when you come and apologize to her and Silver today.”
“So you are taking requests from the little demon now?”
“Spooky! That is no way for a gentlecolt to speak about a young lady.” Rarity scolded while a needle and thread began attacking the suit with vigor.
“Well it is lucky for me that I am neither a colt, nor gentle then isn’t it.” I say with a grin.
“We shall see darling, we shall see.” Rarity mutters. After a few more seconds of sewing and snipping she holds the suit jacket up to the light. “Perfect…now hold still Spooky.”
I yelp as I am once again assaulted by flying pieces of cloth. Luckily it is over quickly as I find myself clothed in an incredibly well fitting suit. I turn to the mirror at the edge of the platform to inspect myself. The white undershirt and the red tie bring the whole thing together nicely.
“Please tell me you made me a black suit.” I say as I adjust the tie so it’s a little more comfortable.
“Of course, a great designer does not ignore the classics but builds upon them. Why do you ask?” She asks as she begins putting away her various sewing instruments.
“Let’s just say I know what I’m going as next Nightmare Night.” I say with a grin.
Rarity eyes me with suspicion for a second. “Alright…so does everything fit alright? No pinching anywhere?” She asks.
“No, it’s great Rarity. Fits like a sexy glove….but…umm…”
“Oh no, what’s wrong? It’s the cloth isn’t it? I knew it was going to chaff…this is a catastrophe! I knew I should have used a silk-cotton blend!” She begins ranting.
“…Rarity…” I try interjecting.
“And what was I thinking with such a simplistic design. It was so contrived, so, so, gauche! My friends deserve the very best.”
“Rarity!” I hop down in front of her trying to get her attention.
“Oh this is just dreadful, how could I have gone so awry! What cruel fate has brought me to this, I shall be ruined. I’ll…I’ll have to become a spinster…an old Na-a-a-ag!” Rarity begins wailing near the end of her speech.
“RARITY!” I yell while flicking her in the nose with a tendril of hair. She immediately snaps her mouth shut and stops crying. “…I just wanted to know if you could make the tie into a bow-tie for me.”
“…That’s it?” She asks, a hint of moistures still clinging to the corner of her eyes.
“Yes, that’s it.” I say with exasperation.
Rarity grins as a strand of magic reaches out and grabs a hold of the tie around my neck. “Why it is simplicity itself.” She says as she deftly undo’s the tie and with a few folds and twists transforms it into a neat little bow tie.
I take another look at myself in the mirror, and I readjust it with two hair tendrils. “Fantastic!” I say with a grin.
“Yes, it looks absolutely marvelous Spooky, but if you don’t mind me asking, why did you want the bow-tie?”
“Bow-ties are cool Rarity…bow-ties are cool.” I say with a slow nod.
“Ugh, now you’re sounding like Rainbow.” Rarity says with a shudder.
“Sorry, couldn’t help myself.” I say as I do a turn in front of her mirrors. “Mhm, nothing suits me like a suit, does it Rarity?”
“Indeed darling, you are rather fetching.”
“Yes, and now I’m dressed to the nines to go and apologize to the little balls of evil.”
“Spooky!” Rarity gasps, “What did I tell you about that sort of language.”
“Just because you tell me not to talk like that doesn’t mean it isn’t true. Those two are bullies, plain and simple. You girls don’t see all of the torment those hellions put the Crusaders through when there aren’t any adults around, but I do. Diamond is a spoiled little girl that gets her rocks off on putting others down, and Silver is almost as bad with her compliance in the whole situation.” I grumble.
“I understand your frustration Spooky, but you still shouldn’t talk about them like that.” Rarity answers with a frown.
A knock comes from the front door and I lean to the side to see Diamond Tiara standing on the stoop with Filthy Rich standing behind her. “Speak of the devil and he shall take a grossly equine turd on your doorstep.”
“Quiet you!” Rarity snaps before making her way to the door. She opens it with a flourish and a smile. “Why hello Diamond Tiara, Mr. Rich, it’s a pleasure to see you today.”
Diamond gives a small curtsy, “A pleasure to see you too Miss Rarity, I’m here to see if Mister Spooky is ready?” She grits her teeth on the ‘mister’; I assume she only said that because her father was right behind her.
“Manipulative little toad.” I mutter under my breath.
“Good day Miss Rarity, it’s a pleasure as always.” Filthy says as he steps up next to Diamond. “We are just here to see if young master Spooky is ready to join us for his...apology.”
“I’m as ready as I’m ever going to be.” I grit my teeth as I see the smirk on her face as she looks at my suit. “Thank you for the suit Rarity, just let me know the next time you’re going gem hunting, and I’ll lend you a hand.”
“You are more then welcome Spooky, and I will be sure to do that. I’ll have the rest of your new suits dropped off at Lyra’s for you.” Rarity says.
Diamond gives a small courtesy to Rarity before turning and heading back down the street.
“Have a pleasant day Miss Rarity.” Filthy says before he turns and follows his daughter.
I give Rarity a nod before I head off after them. After catching up to the both of them we make a turn and head down one of the streets leading to the market.
As soon as we step into the marketplace Big Mac steps out from the crowd. “Excuse me Mr. Rich, but can I take a second of your time to talk about that business proposition we talked about yesterday?”
“Certainly.” Mr. Rich says. “Excuse me for a second would you Mr. Spooky, I shouldn’t be more than a few minutes.” Mr. Rich tells me before joining the Stallion at one of the stalls.
Diamond trots over to me and chuckles while holding a small hoof over her mouth.
“What’s so funny? Or do you not want to let me in on the joke?” I ask.
Diamond titters a little longer before glancing at me. “You’re the joke; I knew I would be able to get Rarity to make you wear that suit in public.”
I blink a few times before I examine my suit. “Why? What’s wrong with it?”
She returns my blinking as we stand in the middle of the market. “Wha? But it’s pink! Stallions HATE wearing pink!”
I raise an eyebrow at that. “Didn’t you know it takes a real man to wear pink?”
“But, but, but aren’t you embarrassed?” She stammered.
“Embarrassed? I embarrass myself all the time…for instance.” I clear my throat and step forward.
“I feel pretty, Oh, so pretty, I feel pretty and witty and gay!” The chatter slowly dies as I start singing in the middle of the marketplace. “And I pity, any girl who isn’t me today.”
I trot up to the Apple’s stand and give a nod to Big Mac who was still ‘chatting’ with Mr. Rich. Mac raises a single eyebrow and Filthy chuckles as I continue. “I feel charming, oh, so charming, It’s alarming how charming I feel!” Continuing past the stand I jump up onto a crate and I can feel all of the eyes in the marketplace on me. “And so pretty, that I hardly can believe I’m real.”
“See the pretty girl in that mirror there: who can that attractive girl be? Such a pretty face, such a pretty dress, such a pretty smile, such a pretty me!” A few giggles echo around the market, mostly from a few mares, but I hear a deep chuckle from the apple stall.
“I feel stunning, and entrancing, I feel like running and dancing for JOOOOYYYY!”
I stand on the crate, panting for breath as a silence falls over the marketplace. The silence hangs in the air for an awkward few seconds before a slow stomp starts from the direction of the apple stand where both Big Mac and Mr. Rich have starting clopping their hooves on the ground. The stomping quickly spreads throughout the crowd and I even hear a small “woohoo” from the back of the crowd.
Smiling, I take a few bows, “Thank you, thank you, I’ll be here all week, be sure to tip your waitress!”
Stepping down from the crate I trot up to Diamond as the rest of the crowd goes back to their business. “See? I don’t need your help to embarrass myself; I can do it fine on my own.” I say to her.
Diamond just stares at me; slack jawed, before I tap her on the shoulder. She shakes her head rapidly before she looks back at me. “Wha? But aren’t you embarrassed to be, well, embarrassed?”
I shrug my shoulders. “Meh, I’ve done so many stupid things that it has to be something really big to get to me. Heck, I once got arrested for disorderly conduct and being drunk in public. Of course I contested those charges since I was first drunk in a bar and then they threw me into ‘public.’”
Filthy trots up next to me with a grin on his face. “An excellent show Mr. Spooky. Thank you for keeping my little princess entertained.”
We begin walking in the same direction as we were heading before my impromptu musical extravaganza and after a few seconds Diamond starts after us.
“No problem Mr. Rich, I thought it would be a good opportunity to show off Rarity’s handiwork.” I say as we walk side by side through the marketplace.
“But it’s just not fair...” Diamond whines under her breath as we trot through the marketplace which has gone back to pretty much ignoring the three of us except for the occasional glance and snicker.
Diamond Tiara falls silent as we continue our walk through town which is just fine with me. We eventually make our way to the edge of town which has houses that are larger and more elaborate than the cookie cutter ones at the center of town. Diamond and Mr. Rich turn towards an open wrought iron gate set into a very high brick wall covered in ivy. Stepping through the gate myself, I see an incredibly large house which seems to be rather out of place with the rest of Ponyville.
Diamond disappears through the front door while I’m ‘admiring’ the décor and the slamming door alerts me to this. “I love what you’ve done with the place Mr. Rich, the Ivy is a nice touch.”
“Why thank you, but it was my gardener who made the decision, I give him a bit of free reign with the lawn and the other plantings.” He says as he steps up to the front door and opens it for me.
I step through the door into a well lit entrance that is adorned with numerous portraits, the only two of which I recognize of being Filthy Rich and Diamond Tiara.
Mr. Rich closes the door again before trotting off down a side hallway. I quickly follow him so I don’t get lost in this goliath of a house. We eventually enter into a well appointed sitting room that has plush armchairs placed around what appears to be an oak table. A tea set is placed in the center with a small tray of biscotti. Sitting in one of the chairs facing the door is Silver Spoon who is sipping from a small cup of tea and nibbling on a chocolate covered biscuit.
Diamond had grabbed a seat next to her and had already poured herself a cup of tea. Mr. Rich pours two cups of tea and sets one down in front of an empty chair for me which I hop into.
“I can’t believe you actually wore that suit through town.” Silver giggles as she sets her tea down on the table.
I grin. “Yes, it’s a lovely suit isn’t it? A Rarity original if you would believe, I’m sure it will be the next big thing. Why I am sure that pink will be the next black.” I say with a grin as I grab a biscuit from the tray.
Silver doesn’t seem to know what to say as Diamond glares at me. Diamond grabs her own biscuit and sits back in her chair with a sulk.
“Well? Aren’t you going to apologize?” Diamond says as she almost slams her teacup onto the table.
“Now Diamond please be polite, Mr. Spooky has been kind enough to come all the way here to make amends for scaring both of you yesterday.” Mr. Rich says with a bit of disapproval in his voice. He turns back to me, “Please Mr. Spooky, whenever you are ready.”
“Alrighty then.” I clear my throat and look the two of them in the eyes. “Silver Spoon, Diamond Tiara, I apologize for scaring you two yesterday. It was rather immature of me and I should have known better.”
Filthy nods his head. “Thank you Spooky. See Diamond, even adults can be wrong from time to time but they can be mature enough to admit they have made a mistake. I hope that -” Filthy is interrupted by a knock on the door. “Yes?” Filthy says.
The door opens to reveal a brown coated earth pony who looks to be as old as granny smith. “Sorry for the interruption sir but one of your store managers is here to see you. He is waiting for you in your office.”
“Thank you Randolph, please tell him I will be there momentarily.” Filthy stands up and slides his chair in as the butler leaves the room. “Mr. Spooky, could I ask you to keep the girls company as I take care of a little business. I shouldn’t be too long, and my apologies for having to do this again.” He says as he makes his way to the door.
As the door closes behind him Silver smiles as she glances over at Diamond. “See, I told you he would be sorry.”
“Oh, I’m not sorry, I just apologized.” I say calmly before taking a sip of tea. “I’m sorry that you two had to go running to daddy, I’m sorry that I also scared the crusaders with the story meant for you two, I’m sorry that you two are such brats that I had to break out that story in the first place. Do you want to know what I’m not sorry for?”
I had set the cup down and slowly leaned in closer to the two as I was ranting. The two of them sunk deeper into the chair before Diamond gives a shaky nod.
I grin. “I’m not sorry that there aren’t any witnesses this time.” I place my front hooves on the table I lean even further towards them. The colors in the room start swimming in front of my eyes and a tinge of grey creeps in on the edge of my vision. “You see, even though you two only met me yesterday, I’ve known you two for a lot longer than that.”
All of the color in the room completely fades away to shades of black, white and grey. “And I can tell you that I have seen a lot of the shit that you’ve pulled on the crusaders and the rest of your classmates.”
A chill descends on the room and I see the girls breath as they shiver. “And I’ll continue to watch. If I see you two being little bitches to the crusaders again I’ll do a lot worse than spilling a bottle of ink all over your lap.” I growl.
Diamond is visibly shaking in her chair, her eyes widening in either panic, recognition or both. “Y-you can’t d-do this. I-I’ll tell my daddy.” She stutters.
I growl slightly as my hair starts whipping around. Silver whimpers and curls up on her cushion. “Yes, I suppose you could, but would he believe you….and the dead do not fear the living.”
A wind picks up in the room, various papers stacked on a desk in the corner tumble to the floor. Diamond jumps and stares at the papers on the ground before jerking back at me.
I take a deep breath as my hair slowly stops whipping around and my color vision slowly returns to me. I sigh as I sit back into my seat. The girls are both trembling visibly so I sit quietly and take another sip of tea which has gone ice cold.
Eventually both of the girls are able to look me in the eye and their violent shivers are downgraded to a slight quivering. “Now girls, I am sorry that was necessary…I really wish that hadn’t been necessary….”
The door opens and Filthy walks back into the room. “Sorry about that, had a bit of an inventory problem...why is it so cold in here?” He asks.
“No clue, sir.” I say as I take another sip of ice cold tea. “How about you girls? Is it too cold in here for you?” I ask with a grin hidden behind my tea cup.
They both shake their heads rapidly. “...Ok.” Filthy says with a raised eyebrow.
I get up from my chair and walk to the door. Stopping at the door, I glance over my shoulder, “Thank you for having me over Mr. Rich. It’s been a...pleasure. Oh and girls…if you take my advice we might actually be able to become friends. It’s always better to have friends on the other side, don’t you think?”
Diamond and Silver both nod vigorously, almost making them look like two pony shaped bobble-heads. I choke down a laugh and retrace my steps through the house until I make my way outside.
I slow down as I get outside. Maybe I was a little hard on them; maybe I should have listened to Applejack and just explained to them what they were doing was wrong… Nah, those two deserved that. Plus it was really enjoyable, I just hope it doesn’t come back to bite me in the ass. Knowing my luck it is probably going to come back and bite me in the ass.
Shaking my head I continue back through town until I make it back to Lyra’s house. Walking inside I find Lyra sitting on the couch with a half-eaten sandwich in her magical grasp. Lyra looks up from her meal, her cheeks stuffed to the point of her looking like a chipmunk.
She tries to say something, spraying crumbs and vegetable matter over the coffee table.
“Lyra, swallow before trying to talk.” I say with an eye roll.
She gulps down her mouthful, “Wha? You actually wore the pink suit through town?”
“Yeah, what of it miss naked all of the time?” I ask as I start taking off the aforementioned suit.
“I just thought it wouldn’t be something you would wear.” She says as she takes another bite of sandwich.
I give her an ‘are you serious’ look as I begin undoing the tie with two of my hair tendrils. “Darling…don’t you know pink is in this year? It makes me look absolutely FABULOUS!” I say with a flourish.
Lyra rolls her eyes at me as I finish disrobing.
“Soooooo, might I be able to commandeer some closet space somewhere for my suit…or suits as it’s going to be when Rarity is done with the others?”
“Just stick it in the guest closet, Bonnie and I decided that we were going to make that your room now.”
“…really? I ask with a small voice.
Lyra nods slowly and then lets out a squeak as my hair shoots over the coffee table and latches onto her. I drag her into a big bear hug and squeeze. “You are my favorite green Unicorn Lyra, and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.”
“Thanks…air please.” She whispers.
I let up on my hug and hold her back at arm’s length. “Wait a minute; does this mean I’m going to have to pay rent?”
Lyra shrugs and then twists in my hold to try and grab her sandwich that she dropped when I grabbed her.
“Uh, I guess we will worry about that later.” I set Lyra back on the couch as she retrieves her sandwich.
I grab ahold of my suit and make my way up to the guest room. After storing my suit in the closet I turn around and survey the room. Yeah, I can definitely make this work. A place to store my soon to be numerous suits, a nice comfy bed that could be used for…activities. And there was even a nice spot in the corner where I can store my body when I’m not using it.
With a nod of my head I make my way back downstairs to find Lyra making another sandwich in the kitchen. “Ok, I’m off to Sweet Apple Acres, apparently I have to watch the Crusaders tonight to help make up for my blunder.”
“HA, good luck with that, you are going to need it.” She says before plopping back down on the couch.
“Yeah, yeah, whatever. Tell Bon Bon I said hi and let her know I won’t be home tonight.” I say before leaving her to her evening snack.
The trip through the town isn’t very eventful, except for a few curious glances from a few of the ponies still out and about at this hour. Stepping through the large grove of apple trees that mark Sweet Apple Acres I wander a bit trying to get my bearings. The laughter of fillies guides me through the trees until I find the small clearing that housed the filly’s clubhouse. The three of them gathered around a large pile of what appears to be various camping equipment.
“…ok, so we’ve got everything we need?” Asks Scoots as I walk up behind them.
“I think so, sleepin’ bags?” Applebloom asks.
“Check.” Sweetie says while she taps some brightly colored sleeping bags.
Applebloom nods. “Emergency lighting?”
“Check.” Sweetie says as she taps a jar full of lightning bugs.
“Board games?”
“Oh yeah.” Scoots says as she leans against a pile of precariously balanced games.
“Ingredients for s’mores?”
“Yep.” Sweetie squeaks as she pulls out a bag of marshmallows she was trying to hide under her tail.
“I think the most important question is if you have brought any spätzle?” I ask as I step up behind them.
“Spooky!” They all shout before I’m tackled by them.
“Hey girls, excited about the campout?”
“Oh yeah…what’s spätzle though?” Sweetie asks while sitting on my chest.
“What’s spätzle? What do you mean what’s spätzle? You can’t go camping without spätzle! The entire trip is ruined now.” I rant as I extract myself from the filly pile.
“Oh no, what are we going to do?” Sweetie rushes over to their pile of gear. “I don’t think we brought any spätzle Spooky, are you sure that we need it?” She asks with worry as she digs through the mountain of snacks.
“Well.” I say with as much seriousness as I can muster. “I suppose we could forget about the spätzle this time, but just this time.” I grin as I walk over to the camping gear and grab as much of it as I could with my hair and begin walking towards the ramp. “So shall we get this party started girls?” I ask looking over my shoulder.
“YAY CUTIE MARK CRUSADER CAMPERS ARE GO!”
Oh dear sweet merciful God, what have I agreed too.
~*~*~
The night was fun, tiring, but fun. After we set up the campsite we set about making some s’mores and over indulging in sweets. The sugar hyped fillies then insisted on a game of hide and seek which of course I had to be the seeker. As the sun set we retired to the tree house, instead of scary stories (which would probably have been a bad idea) we decided to play a few board games. So I eventually found myself playing Applebloom in game of checkers…which I was losing.
I grabbed one of my two remaining pieces and move it forward and it was immediately taken by Applebloom.
“…Yes, yes everything is going according to plan.” I mutter to myself.
“What, was y’all plannin’ on losing then?” Applebloom asks with a tilt of her head.
“Who told you the pla…I mean no! Why would I ever plan on losing?” I say with a grin, shifting my glance over to the other two fillies in the midst of a game of go fish.
“Well if that ain’t the plan then ya sure seem to have made it your plan.” She says as she captures my last piece.
“Curses, foiled again.” I say with a grin. I stand up and stretch and I’m rewarded with a few pops from my back. “Alright girls, it’s getting late and I don’t want to get your sisters even angrier at me.”
“Awww, can’t we stay up a little longer Spooky?” The girls chorus while hitting me with the full power of ‘the cuteness.’
“Sorry girls, I’ve started to develop an immunity to the puppy dog eyes. I also don’t want your sisters mad at me in the morning because you are all exhausted.”
“But we’re not sleepy.” Applebloom says between yawning, which quickly spreads to the other girls.
I herd the girls into their corresponding sleeping bags and tuck them in. “There will be more games in the morning, and then we can go and guilt Applejack into making breakfast.”
“YAY!” They shout as they throw their hooves into the air
“Yeah, yay. Now just close your eyes and go to sleep.” I say with a grin. The girls slowly close their eyes and slowly but surely they all drift off into Luna’s embrace.
I curl up in the corner, not bothering to close my eyes. The soft breathing of the filly’s lulling me into a trance. Now I’m grateful for the new body but I wish that I could go to sleep. Oh well, at least I’m used to the boredom now. I glance towards one of the windows into the starlit night outside. I wonder what Luna is up to right now, I hope she can make some more friends soon…everyone deserves friends. I wonder what the Gatekeeper is up to as well. Her I can’t even begin to understand, but who can understand women anyway. If men were supposed to understand them they would have had an instruction manual included. Which we would then ignore of course.
My quiet contemplation is interrupted by the sound of whimpering. Thinking that the girls are having a nightmare I turn to them. I freeze, my eyes growing large as I take in a sight I wasn’t expecting. Sitting in front of the girls is a familiar green figure which has three lines of mist connecting its mouth to the girls. The girls whimper again as the Mara breathes in and a trail of glittering specks flow into its mouth.
I growl, “Oh no you don’t you son of a bitch.” I lunge forward, tackling the little monster away from the girls. There’s a snapping sound as the connection between it and the fillies is severed.
It hisses as we smash into the floor. Nooo, must feed. Other must give us his food. The raspy voice of the creature rattles through my mind.
“Oh go fuck yourself.” I say as I smash a hoof into its semi-formed face. Or at least I thought I did. My hoof makes contact with the Mara just fine, but the force I apply seems to just push it through the floor. “You have got to be kidding me.” I mutter.
If you will not share, then you will be fed upon as well. Two green limbs reach up through the floor and latch onto my hair. With surprising strength they yank downwards and with a resounding *thunk* my face meets the floor.
“Ow.” I mutter as I slowly pull my head up.
Another yank and I smack into the same floorboard, leaving a small impression behind. Why. Is. This. Not. Working? I hear distantly as each word is accompanied by a yank and a resounding thud.
When the yanking stops I shake my head to clear it from the resounding throbbing that has built up between my eyes and I see a small trail of greyish goo flowing down my muzzle. With a grunt I pull my head back and the Mara comes sliding through the floor with a surprised look on its face. Before it can do anything I wrap my tendrils around it, binding its limbs to its side.
“Ok, I’ve had enough of you douche-nozzle. “ I say as I pull back my right hoof and then with as much force as I can muster punch it right in the face.
It immediately falls limp in my grasp. I shake it a few times and its head just lulls back and forth. I hear indistinct muttering in my head but that’s all the response I get from it. “Well…that was anticlimactic and at least two degrees of impossible.” I say as I sit down, not daring to loosen my hold on the thing.
“Spooky? What’s going on?” I hear Applebloom say from behind me.
I turn around to see that all three of the fillies are rubbing sleep from their eyes. As they lower their little hooves they all gasp. “Holy Cow! What the hay is that?” Scoots asks, popping out of her sleeping bag to get a closer look.
“That Scoot is trouble with a capital T.” I turn to Applebloom. “You better run and get your sister; I think we are in for a long night.” I turn to look at the Mara still limply twitching in my tendrils, “A very long night.”