Applebloomquisition
Applebloom: Ask Jason absolutely EVERYTHING!!!! ... Ahem. But before everything, thank him for the cookie, so thank you to him also for coming out to supervise your lumberjacking, ask him if he's ever been lumberjacking before, and then ask him why he has hands instead of four hooves. Spike's got claws, kind of like his hands. IS HE RELATED TO DRAGONS?!?!
"Thank ya'll again fer comin crusadin with us," you say to Jason first and foremost. You may not be Sweetie Belle or *shudder* her sister Rarity, but your big sister didn't raise no impolite little filly.
"It's no big deal," Jason replies as he follows right behind you.
"Oh, and thanks for the cookie the other day," you say to him afterwards. At that, he just looks at you slightly confused. Maybe he's forgotten about it. Then you see him look to his right a bit away from you. There's nothing there, so what's he looking at?
"Oh," he says in realization. "Yeah, no problem." So he did remember it after all.
1.) Looking up at Jason, ask, "Say, have ya'll ever seen Lumberjacks in your home? Ah mean, we have them here in Equestria, but what are they like by you? Can you think of something they do that might help me and mah friends be better Lumberjacks?"
(Yes, I can silence the Tourge Corporation)
"Have ya'll ever been lumberjackin before?" you ask him. "Or have ya'll seen lumberjacks where yer from? Ah mean, we got em here in Equestria, but what are they like where yer from?" Right before he's about to respond you then add. "Can ya'll think of somethin they do that might help me and mah friends!?"
"Well..." he starts saying. "No, I've never really been lumberjacking before." Drat! Ah well, it was worth a shot. "And I don't really know anyone who is a lumberjack so... Sorry. I can't really help you there."
Well this Jason is a Human, and he mostly wears clothes, ask if he has a cutie mark at all.
If he doesn't, ask him what his special talent was in his world.
Then ask him if he has any fighting or wrestling experience, maybe you and the girls can get your cutie marks in coaching him in professional creature wrestling. You're pretty sure he could take on a Minotaur.
1. What did you do for a living before coming to Equestria?
"It's all right," you say. You knew that was a bit of a long shot, but you asked anyway. Nopony you know is a lumberjack. Then again, he isn't really a pony. Come to think of it... "What kind of cutie mark do you have anyway?" At that, he just looks at you funny. It's almost like he's confused. "Come to think of it, why do yah always wear clothes? Ah mean Ah've never even seen yer cutie mark so what gives? What is it?"
He doesn't answer you. He just keeps looking at you weird like you just asked him what the sun was made of. But you didn't ask him what the sun was made of, you just asked him what his cutie mark was. It's a perfectly reasonable question. He's certainly old enough to have one.
"Well..." he finally says. He looks away from you a bit before continuing. "Humans don't have cutie marks." At that, you stop. You have to, because now its YOU whose just heard something that's impossible. He DOESN'T have a cutie mark. "And all humans wear clothes." He continues. "It's just something we do. I mean, we're not like you guys. We can't go around naked all the-"
"YOU DON'T HAVE A CUTIE MARK!?" You blurt out. You honestly did not hear a thing he said after the fact that he said he didn't have a cutie mark.
"No," he replies. "No I don't."
"But if yah don't have a cutie mark, then how do yah know what yer special talent is?" You're honest to Celestia curious right now. Does he not have a special talent? Is he like a minotaur or a buffalo where they don't have cutie marks but all their special talents are kind of similar? What gives?
"Well..." he begins to say before he pauses again, it takes him a second or so to come up with an answer. "Most of us don't really need a cutie mark. We just sort of know. We really don't need a mark on our butts or anything like that to tell us what we're good at. We just know."
All of this... is really kind of insane. A creature without a cutie mark. It's just Celestia damn unbelievable (don't tell yer sister that you said that). You just stand where you are and keep staring at him for a moment. He just keeps staring back down at you. You almost don't believe him. Part of you wants to make him show you to see if he is telling the truth, but you don't think he is going to even if you ask him (plus this story under no circumstances will ever go there and no force of nature will ever compel me to write that, you sick idiots. Shame on you).
After a few moments you start walking again. Jason follows right behind you.
"Well..." you say, it takes you a moment to find the words you want to say. "What did you do before you came here?" You ask him. "Ah mean, what was your special talent... if you had one."
"Mine?" He replies. "I was a grad student."
"A grad-whatnow?" you ask him. You've never heard of that before. Maybe it's a human thing.
"A grad student," he says. "I guess you could say that I'm like a scholar. I study things." Oh NOW you get it.
"Like Twilight Sparkle?" you ask. She's always reading and Applejack says that she's always trying to learn something new, mostly about friendship, so she's kind of like a grad student you suppose. However, the moment you ask that, it takes a moment for you to realize, but Jason isn't following you anymore. You stop for a moment to look back to see that he has stopped moving altogether. He's not walking, and he just appears to be staring straight. "Jason," you say as you walk back over to him. He still doesn't move. "Jason yah all right there?" He still doesn't respond.
After a moment though, he moves his head violently to the left and then the right like he suddenly got slapped by something and then shakes his head out a little bit.
"I'm sorry where was I?" he asks you once he stops.
"Uh..." you say. You honestly have no idea what the hell just happened. Did you say something wrong? "We were just goin to the treehouse." you say as you put on your brightest smile. Maybe he'll forget about what you said if you just act normal.
"Oh, right," he says as he looks forward again and starts walking. SUCCESS!!! You did it. He doesn't remember a thing.
You run for a bit and catch up to him after your air hoof pump in victory. Thankfully he didn't notice it.
Jason do you have some disease? Becuse you don't have any fur.
"So uh..." you say. It's time for a new question. "Do yah have some kind of disease or somethin, cause you don't have any fur or coat or nothin."
"Oh," he just says. Yep, he's back to normal. "Humans don't have any fur. It's just how we are." Yep... definitely back to normal.
2. What are those little digits at the end of your forehooves?
Ask "What are those things on the end of your arm?"
You're about to question him further on that, but then you notice the things on the ends of his hooves. The things he's using to carry the axes and the bag. Suddenly a question you had before comes back to you like your head to what you almost crashed into last time. You were going to ask that question first, but then that whole "no cutie mark" thing came up and you got a little curious. Now since he doesn't remember that though.
"What are those things on the end of yer forehooves?" you ask him.
"What?" he says as he looks back down at you. He seems to be confused again.
"They look like Spike's claws but..." you have to fight to keep yourself from blushing at the mention of his name. By all of everything he is hot, and not in a literal way. "Oh mah gosh!" You say as you feel your eyes suddenly go wide with realization. "Are you related to dragons!?"
"What?" he says, looking even more confused now. "No. No I'm not related to dragons. We don't even have dragons where I'm from." Somehow, you feel kind of disappointed at that. Then again, if he's not a dragon he's far less likely to try and eat you so that's always a good thing. "Humans are mammals, not lizards," he continues. "And they're called hands. They allow me to carry things."
"Hands?" you say. Now it's your turn to be completely confused again. At that, Jason just sighs and stops walking again. He then puts down the bag, turns around to face you, bends down so he's eye level with you, and holds his hand in front of your face for a moment.
"See," he says. He then moves the weird digits at the end a bit so you can watch. "And these things here are called fingers," he says as he moves each one of them.
"Woah," is all you can say. You have to admit, that is pretty cool. You take a few moments to keep looking at and really study his hand. You look real close like at it. Where it starts, where his fingers bend, everything. It's nothing like a hoof. It's... kind of amazing.
After a couple moments though, though to short a time for you, Jason pulls his hand away and picks up the bag again. You watch his hand closely as it does that. The way the fingers bend around the straps of the bag and pull it close. Normally you, as an earthpony, would carry that bag in your mouth, but he doesn't need to, not with hands. It's kind of amazing.
"Wow..." is all you can say again. Jason just laughs at bit to himself at that.
"Yeah, yeah I guess it is kind of amazing," he says as he looks back down at you.
At that, the two of you keep on walking again and get ever so closer to the tree house.
3. What is your favorite kind of apple.
"Do yah like apples? Oh, what's yer favorite kind of apple?" you ask him now. You are on a roll with these questions now.
"Favorite kind of apple?" he says. "Well, I never really thought about that before." You watch him tilt his head in thought as he thinks of an answer to that. "I guess I like all of them. I'm not real picky." Well, that was a good answer.
2) Why do you wear shoes and what are toes?
"Do you have fingers on yer back hooves?" you ask him.
"No, I have toes," he says. "They're like fingers but they're shorter." At that, you look down at his "toes" to try and see them, but all you see are some weird, leather things that don't look at all like fingers.
"Why yah wearing those then?" you ask as you point to them.
"Oh, shoes? Well, since I don't have hooves like you guys, I can't really walk long distances for extended period of time. So I wear shoes to help me out with that." You suppose you can understand that. Some ponies here wear horseshoes, but you've never seen the point in them yourself.
"Could you take on a minotaur?" you ask him. You've never really noticed before, but he is really REALLY tall. He's almost as tall as your brother, heck, he might even be a little taller. Maybe he could take on a minotaur.
"A minotaur?" he says. "I don't know, I've never really met one."
were do baby humans come from? and other embarrassing questions
"Where do baby humans come from?" you ask.
"What?" he says, seemingly shocked that you asked that question.
3) Is there a possible way to travel across the sunlight forsaken earth with the equation of AC=F3 at the speed of Mach 3 whilst riding a retroactive ostrich born from the dna of a rocket cheetah and a normal virgin ostrich while the G-Force applies extreme pressures into your body and finally make the destination?
"Is there a possible way to travel across the sunlight forsaken earth with the equation of AC=F3 at the speed of Mach 3 whilst riding a retroactive ostrich born from the dna of a rocket cheetah and a normal virgin ostrich while the G-Force applies extreme pressures into your body and finally make the destination?" You feel yourself gasp a bit for breath after saying that.
"Uh..." is all he says.
Ask him what the meaning of life is, then just as he's about to answer(after thinking hard and stammering), arrive at the club house and forget all about your question.
"What is the meaning of life?" you ask him. You're so curious now. YOU REALLY WANT TO KNOW!!!
"Uh... um... uh..." is all he says.
Right as he says that third "uh," though, you notice the two of you suddenly enter a clearing through the trees. You weren't paying attention before because you were looking up at Jason, but you apparently made it all the way to the treehouse.
"Ah, we're here," you say as you look forward at it. Jason appears to have stopped in his tracks.
-PERSPECTIVE SHIFT: Jason Morgan-
SOMEHOW YOU KNEW THIS AREA OF THE ORCHARD WAS FAMILIAR!!!
It didn't help at all when Ghost Pinkie Pie punched you in the face back there, but you had an itching feel that you'd been down this path before, and it turns out you have. You remember that tree house. YOU HID IN IT when you were running away from Twilight.
"Come on!" Applebloom says with the same enthusiasm she had when she was asking you endless amounts of questions. "Ah want yah to meet mah friends Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo," as she runs up to the ramp leading up to the treehouse.
You just stay right where you are. You've been here before, and you're pretty sure right now that whoever Applebloom's friends are, they know it, cause they saw you leap out the window when you ran from here. Plus, you kind of... still have those crayons you took from this treehouse.
And now Applebloom wants you to go inside with her.
What do you do?
-Meanwhile, in the Everfree Forest-
Kirk: "Right, where are we?"
Spock:"Well, captain, we are approximately two miles from our precious location."
Kirk: "So we're lost?"
Spock: "Yes, captain."
Gordon: "Nope, look! There's a gap in the trees. I smell woodsmoke! I think I can see a hut. Let's-"
A ringing noise meaning an incoming comm signal interrupted Gordon, while Kirk grabbed his communicator.
Kirk: "Kirk here, what is it?"
Ensign Chekov: "Sir, we haf transmission from Dalek fleet. They say they haf met new species, calling themselves 'Orzzz.' They want to know if we know them."
Kirk: "I-"
Gordon: "Captain! Did he say Orz?"
Chekov: "We were told Orz, yes. They spoke in cryptic language. They were constantly talking about smells. How Daleks smell new."
Gordon paled visibly, even showing through his perception-filterd body: "Captain, advise the Daleks to accept their help, but not to trust them. They- are an eccentric bunch, but they are very powerful. I have suspicions of their origins, but DO NOT search for them yourself. Those that do" *shudders* "don't ask them personal questions. Don't let them on the ship. DO NOT offend them and acquiesce if they ask you to stop any line of questioning, probing, or even talking. They may seem childish and aloof and harmless, but they could tear through our fleet like we were paper-mache."
Chekov: "Message relayed."
Kirk: "Good, signing off. Gordon, I'm going to assume you know what your talking about there. Now let's see about this cottage."
Zecora: "I hope I'm not being rude, but surely you are not trying to be crude"
*the away team jumps from her sudden appearance*
Kirk: Right, where are we?"
Spock: Well, captain, we are approximately two miles from our previous location.
K: So we're lost.
S: It would appear so, Captain.
McCoy: Well that's just great.
*Ringing noise from Kirk's communicator goes off.
K: Kirk here, what is it?
Chekov *on the other end of the communicator*: Sir, we haf transmission from Dalek fleet. They say they haf met new species, calling themselves 'Orz.' They want to know if we know them.
K: Well, I'm-
*Gordon Freebrony walks over to Kirk, he seems worried.
Gordon Freebrony: Captain, did he just say Orz?
C: We were told Orz, yes. They spoke in cryptic language. They were constantly talking about smells. How do Daleks smell new.
G: Captain, advise the Daleks to accept their help, but not to trust them. They- are an eccentric bunch, but they are very powerful. I have suspicions of their origins, but DO NOT search for them yourself. Those that do" *shudders* "don't ask them personal questions. Don't let them on the ship. DO NOT offend them and acquiesce if they ask you to stop any line of questioning, probing, or even talking. They may seem childish and aloof and harmless, but they could tear through our fleet like we were paper-mache.
*Silence rings between them for a moment.
C: Captain...
K: Right, just relay Gordon's message. We'll have to assume he knows what he's talking about.
C: Yes, captain. *Coms shut off.
K: How are you so much more well informed than the rest of us, Mr. Freebrony?
G: Well, sir.
K: None of us knew of this planet, and yet you brought us here, and now a species we've never even heard of shows up to help and you know all about them? How do you know all of this? Who even are you?
*Large, lion like roar out of nowhere breaks up the conversation, silence rings for a moment.*
K: Mr. Spock, what was that?
S: It would appear to be some type of indigenous life form, captain.
M: Yeah, but what kind of indigenous life form?
*Manticore suddenly bursts through the trees out of f*cking nowhere and roars at them*
-Meanwhile, on the bridge of the Dalek Flagship, the Caesar-
Antares: Affirmative, accepting Orz requests to assist. *looks to other Dalek* Inform them of our desire to maintain peaceful relations, but inform them we do not want them onboard any of the ships. Direct them away from the Brutus, especially. The hatchlings MUST be kept safe! And He (me) is on the Brutus as well! Inform the Nero to position itself 40 balchaks above them, all available weaponry to maintain a lock-on. Take no chances.
Antares: Affirmative, message received. Send a message to the Orz. Tell them we will accept their requests to assist. Inform them of our desire to maintain peaceful relations, but inform them that we do not want them onboard any of our ships. Direct them away from the Brutus especially. The hatchlings MUST be kept safe! And the Commander is onboard the Brutus as well! Inform him of the Orz presence. Inform the Nero to position itself 40 balchaks above them. All available weaponry are to maintain a lock on. Take no chances.
All other Daleks in the room: We obey!
Nanna *from overheard voice projectors: Diagnostic complete. No anomalies detected. No signs of any type of virus or hack in progress. No attempts at hackery were ever made. No cookies or spam detected. All systems running green. Communications, 100%. Everything is running fine and at 100% capacity.
Antares: Inform the hacker squad.
Dalek drone: I obey!
-Meanwhile, in the brig of The Caesar-
(And I do not need to write anything. I believe this sums it up extremely well.)
*meanwhile on the Dalek Spaceship*
*the musical, uplifting tune of the Smile Song lifts the depression that was clouding R.A.'s mind and he then jumps up from the ground, strikes a pose and yells at the top of his lungs...*
R.A.: YEAH! MY STRENGTH RETURNS! Thank you Pinkie Pie for granting me two things. 1. Returning me to my normal self and 2. Letting me inadvertently break the fourth wall by summoning you here. I will be sure to dedicate a song to you during the after-party once this whole situation about Risen is resolved. *gets on hands and knees and bows deeply* Thank you again Pinkie Pie!
*meanwhile the Dalek gaurds just ignore R.A. but deep down they think that he is seriously pants-on-head insane*
Status: Edited
Blazewings thunder: 3
Masterweaver: 1
somepony1: 1
Authors note:
Updates might be a little later than usual this week cause of some stuff going on in real life. Sorry. I'll still update on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays, but yeah. If for some of you this updates at 12:48 am the next day, its because I'm writing them later than usual, so yeah. Sorry.
Also I want to acknowledge this comment for a moment here from Grey Rebl
*At headquarters
Grey Rebl: *grumble*...Where in Tatarus did I put those files? *grumble*
Operative: Director, you may need to–
GR: Not right now, I'm too busy to find your lost cat...
Operative: Director, sir! It's not that! It's from the LPIA (Las Pegasus Intelligence Agency) and the CIA! (Canterlot Intelligence Agency)
GR: Really? Is it another threat from the changlings?
Operative: No.
GR: Is it the Criminal Network?
Operative: Partly.
GR: ...Are they smuggling sexualized Wonderbolt posters again?
Operative: They are, but that's not what we're being informed of.
GR: Okay, then what?
Operative: ...I think you should see for yourself. *Puts a file on GR's desk along with a photo.*
GR: *Stops fumbling with the file cabinet, and takes a look at photo* ...What's this here? *In the photo, was a crate with a raven and it's steel wings raised towards the sun above it printed on the side.*
Operative: These were found being smuggled from Las Pegasus to Canterlot. It's contents are unknown. We tried to break into it, but it appeared to be enchanted. The only way we could open it is with a special key. One of these crates are to be sent to Intelligence Agencies all over Equestria for a collaborative effort to forcefully open it and locate it's source.
GR: ...! *Upon recognizing the symbol from the Dalek fleets database downloaded via Nana, he whipped towards the operative* Is the crate here?
Operative: Yes, sir.
GR: Send Agent Brauburn to Ponyville with the crate by train. I believe there will be an early Apple reunion. Come on, Solid Grey. Let's get you into Metal Gear... *Squirrel climbs onto his back*
Operative: You know what's going on? What is it then?
GR: Yes, I know. It's classified though. Oh, tell the Lab Ponies to ready one of our Mach 3 Ostriches for Solid Grey. He will be going in a secret mission.
Operative: But sir, the equation hasn't been proven right yet!
GR: The equation applies to a pony, we are talking about a squirrel.
Operative: *sigh* Yes, director. It will be done.
I mean... I didn't use this comment and I'm not gonna use it, but damn man. What the hell kind of organization are you running here? Cause I would seriously like to work there if it was that awesome. 
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Well give back the crayons and apologize, you stole them like a week ago, why do you even need them anymore?
Also when meeting with Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo if they seem a bit apprehensive towards you, do the cookie behind the ear trick again, it helped Applebloom get comfortable with you so it should work again, even though you have absolutely no friggen Idea how you do it.
In response to the AN
An organization that weaponize Squirrels and have them use High Fequency cut-things-exponentionally-bigger-than-itself swords whilst wearing magi-enhanced body armor. Yes, I was referencing Metal Gear Rising. Other then that, it's an thousand-year-old international network of intelligence that Luna made for the sole purpose of watching ponies sleep. Apparently they decided to mess around with common critters during the princess's absence. Most importantly, the ostriches. Dey funnier den Raiden's Cartwheels.
—————————————————————————————————————————————————————————
If the Crusaders didn't had anything to do activities with their writing material ( Crayons being the only one), then it's time to plead guilty. Come on, you know how bored kids get. Then again, the fillies seemed to have things for EVERYTHING, and a lot of things to prepare for anything, too.
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________
*At the Dalek ship, and because I'm a bit sleep deprived at this very moment I'm going to make this short*
Grey Rebl: Okay, there is nothing wrong with our communication, my video connection has suddenly turned green, and we have contact with another species. This a little too good to be true, don't you agree Nana?
Nana: Director, the chances of something lurking around the ship would be 99%, assuming peaceful diplomacy with the other species goes well.
GR: And that 1%?
Nana: ...R.A is actually not crazy and there really is something in the ship.
Hacker: I highly doubt it. I swear, he probably sneak meth into those cookies...
GR: Meth?
Hacker: A human thing you might not want to know about.
GR: Er, okay... Anyways, speaking of R.A, I was wondering: What's his story?
Hacker: He's an Anonymous; we'll never know for sure.
GR: You know, not seeing the big picture is a big pet peeve in equestrian agencies.
Hacker: Well deal with it, 'cause his hyperactive and unpredictable nature along with his short mental capacity is all what your going to get!
Jason: Go inside, and talk to the girls. Lay down some safety ground-rules for the lumberjacking expedition, like don't swing the axe too hard or it will fly off, and only one Crusader trying it at a time so they don't wind up accidently hitting each other with the axes, stuff like that... And wear helmets if you had thought of it. And goggles. If they have any. Oh, and ask Applebloom if she has a tree in mind... needs to be one that's mostly dead or decrepit.
To Jason:
Go into the tree house. Meet with Sweetie and Scootaloo. If they recognize you, give back the crayons and apologize for taking them. If they don't, and are missing the crayons, give them back, stating that you found them. If they don't recognize you and the crayons don't come up, forget about them. Attempt to gently steer the Crusading towards something or somewhere relatively safe.
Also, ask Applebloom why she was asking so many strange questions.
Recognize the resemblance between Sweetie and Rarity, and ask if they are related.
Notice that you have met nopony even closely resembling Scootaloo, and ask who her folks are.
This is a story about Twilight attempting to rape a human, and we're the sick idiots? Shame on you. (Quote intended.)
Give them back the crayons.
Go into the tree house and clear up any other questions the CMC have, while discreetly returning the crayons... they were never gone.
Then inspect there weapons... er, tools and safety equipment before you go.
Oh, also tell Applebloom that the answer to life is 42.
You act as if nothing is the matter, and then If asked (about the crayons), you throw the crayons at them and run away screaming!
"Crayons? What crayons? I didn't take any crayons!" You say suddenly, in your most innocent voice possible (i.e. a high-pitched 'I'm Guilty!' voice). When the crusaders ask what you meant, come clean and give back their crayons. Ask them if you could have a pen or pencil though. You still need to be able to write!
______________________________________________
Kirk: "Set phasers to stun! Take it down!" he yelled as he whipped out his phaser.
Three concentrated beams of light spewed from McCoy's, Spock's and Kirk's phasers, hitting the creature in an impressive light show. Unforetuneatly, nothing happened.
Gordon: "My turn! AIAIAIAIAIAIAIAIAIAIAIAAIIAIAIAIAIAIAIAI!!!!" He raced towards the creature, crowbar raised, trying his best to beat the crap out of it.
unfortunately, the manticore was immune to his fear-inducing effects, batting away the suitless man, although the creature only saw a suitless pony.
Gordon: "Ow. You see, this is why I wanted my suit." He whined as he started coughing, a small trickle of blood coming forth from his mouth.
Kirk: "McCoy, look after Gordon. Spock, phasers on kill. Also-" *wham* Kirk landed near Gordon, the beast's paw having shot out while he was giving orders. McCoy hurried after his captain and crewmember, his doctor's bag at the ready. Spock, meanwhile, turned a nob on his phaser, taking careful aim at the creature.
Unknown: "WAAAAAIIIIITTTTT!!!!"
Spock stopped, as a butter yellow flying horse galloped forward, her pink mane flying out behind her.
Unknown: "Now I thought I told you not to attack ponies!" the pegasus said to the manticore, her stern scolding voice worse than whips to the poor manticore. It cowered away, trying to hid behind it's tail. "Now you apologize to these ponies and go!" The manticore whined, before turning to each of the away team in turn, whining out what must have been a manticore's apology.
Unkown:"Good. Now go!"
So bidden, the manticore left, running for all it's life's worth. Spock stepped up behind the pegasus.
Spock:"Greetings. As the highest ranking officer currently conscious, it is fallen to me to introduce our group. I am Spock. That is Dr. McCoy. That Is Gordon Freebrony. And that is Captain Kirk. "
The pegasus 'eeped' as if it had forgotten they were there, before mumbling out something incoherent.
Spock: "I'm sorry, could you repeat that."
Fluttershy: "I'm Fluttershy."
_________________________________________________________
To the author: IT WAS WORTH IT! I don't mind being cliche as the crew has now met Fluttershy. I really do hope you use this one. If you don't want Fluttershy... Well fine. Just you'll have to include some other way of defeating the manticore. I figured it'd be better not to kill it, considering the show it's from, and the fact that I had to make it seem reasonable. Especially since the first enemy almost always beats the crap out of Kirk and his crew in most episodes. So this worked out fine!
And if no one else is going to say it, I will.
"NOPONY EXPECTS THE APPLEBLOOM INQUISITION!"
fc09.deviantart.net/fs70/i/2012/229/9/0/natr_day_15__pony_being_inquisitive__puzzled_pony_by_anime_underdog-d5bhhe6.jpg
(image found on google images)
Get in. Act normal. NORMAL I TELL YOU. Leave the crayons in place when nobody is looking. Supervise them while they... do whatever they are going to do, but don't supervise too much or you might get tired. After all work is done, pick a nice quiet and peaceful place to sit, or stand if you feel like it. Then, stay still for... about 50 minutes. Maybe more, maybe less, you can never now. I am certain you can also do other useful stuff meanwhile, but being useless will be more efficient. In fact, being annoyingly still is guaranteed (HE LIED) the best method. You will most likely hear a sound after some time, and a random object will fall from the sky, or, in official terms, drop. Try to avoid it as to not hurt yourself. If it is a weapon, or a hat, or some of stupid useless crap (Hats. Who wants that?), just throw it in a bin or something, useless... HOWEVER! If it is a crate, keep it to open it with the key! Mysterious treasure awaits inside...
pick up sweetie bell and scream
"ITS SO FLUFFY IM GONNA DIE"
then noogie scootalo
2739031
no this is the meaning of life duh
could not get the youtube to work
ooooo.... so we can try our hand at putting a oc into the side story? well shall we give it a go.
" broadcasting in all languages and frequencies. this is captain mcgee of the systems alliance dreadnought 'plannet cracker'. we are standing by with military assests and civial assests. in accordance with first contact protocols.that is all. * while still on viewing * c."tell me were are we,pilot?" p."it seems the dimensional engines worked" c." good, now how long till we can jump once more?" p."um... one year" c." fantastic.*sigh* why me god?" *high strung voice* "because you were ordered to captain" c." dam salarians" *from the com officer* "sir we are still broadcasting" c." oh fuck me. shut the dam thing dow...." *coms shut down violently*
Dalek Regulus: All systems have been fully rebooted and are prepared for launch! We await your order, master SD!
Me: *takes a bite out of an apple* Raise all shields to full, make sure nothing can warp here unless it's the Enterprise's crew. And don't you think it's a bad idea for them to have the captain go down there on a foreign planet? Is this what they normally do? Huh, funny he isn't dead and most of his red-shirted mooks are... Whatever. Hey, R.A! Ready to get out of that cell now (since Razor didn't let him out the first time)?
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R.A.: YES! Although I was about to get myself out to begin with by using my golf club, a bottle of mayonnaise, two firecrackers, and tape recording of Leroy Jenkins epic battle-cry... the ten hour version.
Hacker:..... *face palms and sighs* Just- just let him out please.
Follow Applebloom into the treehouse and pretend nothing is wrong while wearing a bad poker face.
(Before I forget)
Jason, it is with the up most importance that you do not, I repeat, DO NOT! Do anything stupid while inside this tree house. If that doesn't work then just apologize to Sweetie and Scootaloo for breaking into their tree house.
I can't get over all the extra unnecessary filler in this sequel. It doesn't... I... I just...*sigh*