Wake up. See this. What do? - Part 2: Raise the Flag (comment driven story)

by RazortheAwesome

Welcome to Round 2 (Recap)

Welcome to round 2 fellow readers.

Lets have ourselves a little recap shall we.

Jason Morgan, a completely normal human from earth, somehow found himself waking up in Equestria with Twilight Sparkle standing over him and looking down at him with a lascivious grin on her face. It soon (and by soon, I mean instantly) became clear that Twilight Sparkle wanted to mate with him (do the deed, make sweet love to, ride him into the sunset or oblivion, you take your pick). Right then and there. Being a completely normal human, Jason did not want to have sex with a horse and instead, using his cunning wit and superior decision making skills (and by that we mean ripping up a copy of the pony stura) got himself out from under Twilight Sparkle and ran for his life. However, Twilight, not being one to give up so easily, chased after him.

After running into the market street and accidentally destroying Applejack's apple stand, he soon found asylum in the home of the lesbian pony couple Lyra and Bon Bon, who let him in because Lyra was a conspiracy nut who loved humans (Bon Bon was a little apprehensive about it at first). Soon afterwards, after Jason first did a dance that he would soon make famous in Ponyville, it was revealed that Lyra and Bon Bon were in fact, massive stoners, and, after seeing the peril that Jason was in, allowed him to smoke with them. However, such peace would not last, as Twilight (now looking like Solid Snake with a katana) and Applejack soon found Jason and burst through the door of Lyra and Bon Bon's house. Lyra and Bon Bon held off the two insane members of the mane 6 in an epic battle, allowing Jason to escape.

After some more running, he soon found himself at the carousel boutique, where he begged Rarity to let him in and hide. She agreed after seeing that her friend Twilight was, well, insane, and allowed Jason to stay with her for the night. She even made him a completely awesome suit free of charge. However, right as Jason went to sleep, it soon became clear that Rarity had her own agenda as when Jason woke up, he found himself tied to Rarity's bed. Apparently she wanted to have her way with him as well after she let herself get curious about him. After a DBZ abridged reference, Twilight burst into Rarity's bedroom and attacked her, demanding Jason back. Rarity however, threw him through the window and told him to run, which Jason did before he was suddenly knocked out cold.

During Twilight and Rarity's epic battle however, it was revealed that the reason Twilight wanted to have her way with Jason was so that she could create a being called a centaur because according to her, Nyarlathotep (yes, the Lovecraftian Outer God) was coming, and a centaur was the only being that could fight him (a claim later proven false, but we'll get to that). However, when questioned about it, Twilight refused to to say anymore and knocked Rarity into one of her walls.

Shortly afterwards, Jason woke up in Applejack's basement, where she did not try to have her way with him, and instead told him that she wanted him to work for her at Sweet Apple Acres for her in order to pay her back for destroying her apple stand. Since Jason didn't really have a counter argument for that (and because Big Macintosh was there and he frightened him a little since he was friggin huge), he agreed. In return, Applejack agreed to keep him safe from the now obviously insane Twilight. After a day of pulling carts of apples back and forth between the orchard and the barn, Jason was soon discovered by Rainbow Dash. In a panic, Jason (after luring her in close by hiding under a box, which she found) tackled her to the ground and pinned her there. After a quick interrogation, it was not only revealed that not only did Twilight ask Rainbow Dash to look for a human for her, but that Jason for whatever reason smelled nice. Really nice. Nice enough to give Rainbow Dash a wingboner.

Applejack soon returned however, and fought Rainbow Dash off in a moment of misunderstanding so that Jason could escape. After running through the apple orchard, temporarily hiding in the CMC clubhouse before being discovered and running away again, Jason soon found himself back in Ponyville and found his way to Sugarcube Coner, where Pinkie Pie made sweet sweet

PINKIE STOP THAT!!

"*giggle* sorry."

Sigh, I should probably mention that Pinkie kind of has complete mastery over the fourth wall since she can talk directly to me and the other commenters on occasion. Anyway. The moment Jason entered Sugarcube Corner, he was instantly knocked out again, and when he woke up again, he was strapped to a table where he was forced to watch Pinkie Pie reenact the "Sweet Transvestite" scene from The Rocky Horror Picture Show of all things. After Braeburn rode in through the wall on a motorcycle and started reenacting the "Hot Patootie/Bless My Soul" scene, Jason got free from the table and ran back outside. Pinkie Pie however, was very disappointed in the fact that her reenactments of scenes from the Rocky Horror Picture Show did not bring a smile to Jason's face.

After running some more, Jason soon found his way back to Lyra and Bon Bon's house, and while he did not find them, he found a note from them telling him to go to the Everfree Forest at the edge of Ponyville while also leaving him both a map and a compass so he could find it. Having no idea what the Everfree Forest was, Jason did not think twice about going there, as if there was anypony he could trust, he was Lyra and Bon Bon. On his way there however, he met a bear, and after her most certainly DID NOT faint (okay, he did, shut up), he was picked up by Fluttershy, who took him into her house and gave him some tea. After talking to her for a little while and explaining what happened to him, she felt sorry for him and agreed to let him stay the night and keep him safe from Twilight. Some time in the middle of the night however, Jason woke up to find Fluttershy in bed with him, with her hooves around him like she was hugging him. After accidentally waking her up, she politely asked Jason he she could hold him down against his will.

All was not lost however, as Lyra and Bon Bon showed up and knocked out Fluttershy before she could do anything. The two of them, along with their friends Minuette and Berry Punch (short story short, they got knocked into their house at the end of their fight with Applejack and Twilight and had a foursome so they are friends now), took Jason through the Everfree Forest and to a giant rock at the edge of a mountain somewhere. Behind the giant rock was a cave with a little oasis in it with a campsite for all of them set up. This is where Lyra and Bon Bon were bringing Jason to hide here until this all blowed over. However, it was also reveled here that Jason had a "heat spell" cast on him by Twilight that made every mare in his immediate vicinity go into heat whenever they were around him, thus explaining why every mare he met wanted to make sweet love to him, and why after their epic pony battles, they had all felt a little "in the mood" as it were. The only reason that Lyra, Bon Bon, and indeed Minuette and Berry Punch, aren't wanting to jump on Jason is because they are all lesbians, so they have no real desire for him at all.

From here, the story followed the insane adventures of Twilight Sparkle as she attempted to find Jason and mate with him. After some insanity, meeting the ghost of King Sombra (yes, that happened), and one fight in the Everfree Forest with Fluttershy, Twilight finally found the cave that Jason had been hiding in. Jason, being a man, decided to put away his fears and confront Twilight Sparkle with a special knife given to him by Lyra. After tricking Twilight into letting her guard down, Twilight was suddenly ambushed by all of her friends, who pinned her down while Spike got a magic restraining horn on her and Rarity got a straight jacket on her, thus effectively restraining her. After some questioning, Jason found out that after they had all seen how insane their friend was getting, they all decided to step in and help you before either of you got hurt, and since the heat spell wore off, none of them have any interest in you, not even Rarity.

Twilight, naturally in her insanity, yells at all of them and says that she needs to have her way with Jason so that she could produce a Centaur. However, Lyra, who had just come out of the cave, informs Twilight that Centaurs are not magical and had absolutely no potential for magic. While they were a proud race of warriors, really were no different than humans, thus making everything that Twilight tried to do, entirely pointless. After some more short discussion, Jason walks back through the forest back to Lyra and Bon Bon's home where he goes to sleep.

However, elsewhere, a pony going by the name of Risen Flag is elected to the position of a Canterlot Senator with the help of Trixie, whom he had saved from getting raped in an alleyway a few months prior. After getting elected, he makes a speech to a crowd of ponies outside the Canterlot Palace saying "welcome to a brave new world."

Back in Ponyville, Jason wakes up for the day and, after getting his suit and some more human clothes back from Rarity and an invitation for his "Welcome to Ponyville" party from Pinkie Pie (because she is Pinkie Pie she just does that), he heads back to Sweet Apple Acres to do some more work there, since he still has a debt to pay to her for destroying her Apple Stand. After almost nearly become aware of the commenters and the fact that he is in a story, he arrives to find that Applejack is suddenly being nice to him, whereas before she was always kind of angry at him for completely understandable reasons. This is only further cemented when he falls and knocks his head into a tree and Applejack shows genuine concern for him. This also gains him a "ghost Pinkie Pie" that constantly follows him around even when Pinkie Pie is not there. While he is chopping some wood, Applejack comes over and apologizes to him for making him work, since its unfair to him given all that happened, and that he doesn't have to work anymore if he doesn't want to.

Jason, being the smooth one that he is, simply hugs Applejack and says that he forgives her. After they share a moment, Applebloom comes back and meets him too, and while that is happening, off in the trees, Jason momentarily sees something that looks like Slenderpony, but he just chalks that up to his imagination since it couldn't have been him. After he leaves, and is given a fresh Apple Pie for his efforts, Jason goes back to Lyra and Bon Bon's house to get ready for his Welcome to Ponyville Party.

At said party, all kinds of fun is had, Jason meets all kinds of new ponies including Derpy and her husband Time Turner, and even brings the dance known as "The Dinosaur" to the population of Ponyville, as they all do it with him when the song "Walk the Dinosaur" plays. The following morning, with surprisingly no hangover. Spike comes over to talk to Jason. Apparently, Twilight had fallen into depression because of everything that happened, and while Spike did call Princess Celestia to see Twilight, asked Jason if he would be willing to try and speak to her. Reluctantly, Jason agrees, provided that he is made safe and that his pony friends (and the rest of the mane six) are around just in case something happens. Spike agrees to this and leaves to get everything prepared.

After a quick tour of Ponyville from Lyra and Bon Bon, and a suddenly mane street musical in which the song "Safety Dance" is sung by Jason, Pinkie Pie, and the rest of Ponyville, Jason eventually meets with Twilight in her library. Lyra, Bon Bon, Spike, and all the rest of the Mane 6 are watching just in case. When he sees Twilight though, he sees that she has fallen into deep depression, as she has not been eating or sleeping for what seems like days, and she won't even talk to him when he says anything. She won't even eat the dinner Spike prepared for them when Jason arrived.

While Jason has every reason to hate her, he cannot stand to see her like this, and like he did with Applejack, he hugs Twilight and forgives her. At that point, Twilight breaks down and cries, saying that she is sorry to Jason over and over again. After putting her to bed, Jason leaves with Lyra and Bon Bon, but not before hearing from Spike that Princess Celestia wants to see him too, since he is at the center of all of this. Jason agrees to that and leaves with Lyra and Bon Bon back to their house, where they all smoke to celebrate their victory.

The next morning, some royal guards show up at Lyra and Bon Bon's door to inform Jason that Celestia is there and waiting for him. After a freakout which proves to be largely unnecessary, Jason goes to meet Celestia, who trolls him the first chance she gets and laughs at it. From there, Jason, Twilight, and Celestia all get on a carriage and fly back to Canterlot, Twilight still sleepy from the night before.

What follows is an epic troll off between Celestia and Jason as they try to out troll each other in the guise of simple conversation between them. Right as they reach Canterlot however, they run into Risen Flag of all ponies, who greets them politely, however, he stops when he sees Jason. While he still tries to be polite, it is obvious that he cannot stand to look at him. Celestia doesn't notice this. Twilight however, begins freaking out when she sees him as if she has seen the most horrifying thing in her life. Before she can say anything however, she falls asleep again, and Jason and Celestia take her back to a room in the palace where she can sleep.

Celestia then gives Jason a grand tour of the palace, during which the epic troll off between the two continues. Along the way they meet Princess Luna, who disapproves of her sisters antics. She leaves them once they get to the palace library, where she goes into the comic books section and starts reading. Apparently Luna likes comic books.

After that, Jason and Celestia go to the throne room to discuss important matters, namely, getting Jason back home. It is here that Celestia reveals that she cannot send Jason back home, as due to the nature of the multiverse, and that there are multiple universes with humans, she would not know where to send him back to, and that is why they need Twilight. Since she pulled Jason from somewhere in the multiverse, she would know where to send him back to. She also reveals the history of the centaurs. Namely that humans and ponies have met before, and that the centaurs are the result of mixed breeding between the two. To make a long story short, the humans left Equestira and the Centaurs were all exterminated when they tried to usurp the throne of Equestria for themselves, killing everyone they saw along the way.

After Celestia shows Jason part of the royal treasure vault, in which she reveals that she still has some human relics, including the legendary sword Excalibur, Jason leaves to go back to Ponyville, since he still has business there.

However, elsewhere in the palace, Risen Flag returns to his office, where he becomes enraged that a human has found his way to Equestria. Here it is revealed that Risen Flag is in fact, Nyarlathotep himself, and that he and all the others that he is in league with, namely Trixie, Queen Chrysalis, Joseph Curwen (from the case of Charles Dexter Ward), Slenderpony, Haypennywise, and even the newly resurrected King Sombra, are all planning a takeover of Equestira. Flag orders Jason to be killed, and sends Haypennywise to deal with it, while he gives Queen Chrysalis an unknown assignment. After this, they all leave and leave him and Trixie alone in his office together.

Elsewhere in Las Pegasus however, the recently released Screwball, looks upon a portrait of Risen Flag and says "My life for you." before returning back to work, which is making guns and ammunition. Yes, Flag is making guns in Equestria.

And that is that.

Did we mention that Jason also has the ability to channel the abilities of two fictional characters at any given time? Because he does. Also he has a ghost Pinkie Pie following him around at all times.

"You already mentioned that."

Sorry, thanks Pinkie.

"*giggles* No problem."

And yeah, also get used to Pinkie Pie here, she does that on occasion.

But yeah.

For more detailed descriptions of what happened, please see the original story:

Wake up. See this. What do?

Now, shall we begin.

Comments

[BrownDog77]

You forgot to mention the Hind Helicopter piloted by Jesus, Solid Snake and Discord that keeps showing up

[RanmaChaos]

Great recap

[WorldWalker128]

Previously, on 24...

[Moonshine-Dusk]

Once I finally catch up I can contribute! I was so annoyed reading the 80 chapters leading, and I have another 30 to go...

[Rony rockdile]

I just finished part 1, I thought it would end at 70 chapters, but I just found out there's 80 more to read...