The Life and Times of an Alchemist Turned Pony

by Thadius0

Chapter 10 - Well, that was less painful than I thought it'd be

After the madness subsided and Twi got her library in, more or less, order, we conducted a quick test with my hooves.

Said test was comprised of me sticking my right forehoof in a machine designed to read magical levels and activating its ability. Why said machine was in the basement, I will never know.

"Seriously, I get why you want to know. But what I want to know is what you'll do with the knowledge once you have it."

Twilight shot a slight glare at me when she realized I'd deliberately avoided using the word 'understand'. "Mostly I'm going to note it down and make sure that you know what I find out. I...might look into recreating it, in my spare time."

I chuckled a bit at that. "You've tasted the power, now you want to know how to recreate it. Can't say I didn't see that coming. Word of warning, though?"

At her nod, I continued. "Discord became the cooky Lord of Chaos. Luna turned into Nightmare Moon under its influence, which took the Elements of Harmony to purge from her. And Omega...well, let's not go into him. If you aren't careful with what you seek, the boundless potential contained within will drive you mad."

Twilight actually backed up a step. Good, she's learning respect. "What...how can you know so much about it?"

I sighed and rolled my eyes. "Because Eureka contains my moment of madness. I asked a question, the Question, of how everything works. The Answer drove me mad. From the subatomic to the Multiverse, I was treated to a rapid-fire view of how it all ties together. And thus Eureka latched on to it, preserving it and sharing my 'enlightenment' with anyone foolish enough to touch my sword."

Twilight was visibly paler and backing further away towards the upstairs when I waved my other forehoof at her. "You don't have to worry. Over my time with it, we've gained a working relationship, me and Eureka. It just seems to be more...mischevious when its taking the place of my hooves. I can control and direct it, to a degree. You're not in any danger by just standing there."

Twilight gulped, nodded a few times, visibly steeled herself, then returned to her machine. "So..."

I rolled my eyes, not that she would see it. "Yes yes. For all the good it'll do you, you can try. Honestly, I think it's a one-off, bound to the artifact itself."

A few seconds passed, followed by Twilight clearing her throat impatiently. I merely grinned at her. "What? I need to find an appropriate phrase. I want to have you remember it."

She sighed and rolled her eyes, and that was when I decided 'fuck it.' "Behold the power of Eureka, Blade of Understanding!"

My hoof lit up with a flash, there was a jolt in said hoof, and all the needles on Twi's machine jumped. The moment she got her results, she was a happy mare. I don't think I've seen that sort of smile on any pony save Pinkie.

Of course, said smile faded rapidly as she actually went over her results, before she sighed and let her head sag. Then she looked at me and explained the cause of her sudden mood swing. "I've never seen anything like this before. The amount of energy that flows through your hoof at the sound of one word...it's like any other unicorn pony if their special talent was some form of spell or spellcasting. I would need to study this for years just to figure out how to define it, much less replicate it."

I sighed at that. "Twi, don't burn yourself out over me. Whether or not you comprehend how I do the things I do does not stop me from doing them."

"But that's just-"

"Pinkie."

At that, Twilight blinked a few times before admitting defeat. "Fine, so somepony else can also do weird things and it doesn't stop me from being her friend." She suddenly gained a worried expression. "We...are friends, right?"

I smiled and withdrew my hoof from the machine before placing it on her withers. "I would like nothing more."

-----

After Twi and I reemerged from the basement, I was treated to a tour of the town, Pinkie Pie style. In this fashion, I was able to learn, quite quickly, all of the things that were located within the town borders.

I didn't get to learn where those things were in relation to other things, though. Pinkie kept dragging me along, quite literally at least half the time, and my head kept spinning. I wasn't afforded any frame of reference or time to make one, either.

Darn you, Pinkie. That enthusiasm makes you so endearing, yet at the same, it time frustrates me to no end.

She and I got into a small...okay, medium-sized debate on where, when, how large, what sort, all the details of, and whether or not my 'Welcome to Ponyville' party would happen. Apparently I needed another one, since now I was living near Ponyville. And was now a pony.

"But it should be in your tower! It's where you are more often than not!"

I sighed and rubbed my forehead with a hoof. "Two things. First, thank you for bringing that to my attention, I'll make an effort to not be cooped up in there all the time. Second, no. I would have to invite you in, which ruins the idea of a surprise party."

Pinkie tilted her head and thought for a moment before smiling. "Not quite true. Measured Thought could also invite us in while you were out and about."

I blinked at that, surprised I hadn't thought of it. "Well...yes, that could work. I'd...rather you didn't, but if you're that dead set on throwing me a party..."

Pinkie nodded fast enough that her head could be mistaken for a jackhammer, and I continued. "I'd also rather not have every pony show up if they don't want to. Plus I'm not sure all the ponies in Ponyville will fit in my tower."

Pinkie put a hoof to her chin and hummed for a moment. "Fair enough. I'll just ask around to see which ponies would be interested in the party, then check with Measured to see if the tower can hold that many."

She then fixed me with a steely glare. "But you are getting one, mister, and you'll enjoy it. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but soon, and you'll remember it for the rest of your life."

And on that...very odd note, Pinkie resumed smiling and bounced off. I blinked a few times, trying to place the familiar-sounding words.

Did...did she just channel Bogart?!

-----

The Mirror is a truly fascinating artifact. Which is of course why I spend at least an hour studying it a day.

...It is most certainly not just an excuse for me to look into the adventures of a certain windy individual. Though I will admit I did miss conversing with him.

I could tell that the mirror acted for the Void Eternal in a similar manner that sunglasses do for the sun: it filtered out the harmful influences, allowing one to see the madness in a different light. Namely, in a manner that could be understood without driving you mad. Or you needing to invent at least a dozen new words to describe the whole experience.

Curious, I tapped the mirror, asking it to show me the world where the chain had come from. It obliged, showing me...

Is...is that Displaced a version of the Ghost Rider?

...Well. I might want to pay him a visit, when I have the time. The very idea of his 'character' just resonates with me.

I mean, just think about it: someone who only acts against the guilty? Who punishes them by making them feel their victim's pain?

Brothers in all but blood, I'd say.

I directed the mirror to the world that had sent the diamond, and there was a lurch. A girl wearing black and gold clothing was sitting, talking to her version of the Mane Six. But there was still a discordant note, a sensation of my funny bone being struck when I looked at that world.

Show me her most probable future, I told the mirror.

Images swirled and shifted before settling on an image of...

Equestria in ruins. Canterlot in ruins. The girl standing atop the bloody, mangled corpses of two alicorns. One with an alabaster coat, and the other one a brilliant blue.

...Damn, she did have a grudge against them. But if they were to die, then-

The images swirled again. Changelings coming in, taking over. Monsters from the Everfree roaming free, no longer afraid of the ponies. The Crystal Empire falling to Sombra.

Equestria, essentially, falling. Ponies were only allowed to live so that a group of unicorns could move the sun and moon every day/night cycle.

...She could destroy all of her Equestria in her mad quest to kill her version of the Sisters.

I focused, and with a bit of thought, I found and directed one of my coins from the Void Eternal to her world. It popped into existence in front of her, and once she picked it up, I felt the connection.

I flung myself through my mirror, following the guideline through the Void Eternal. Finding and breaching her world was trivial thanks to the link she'd unknowingly established. There was a flash of light, and I landed in front of her.

She was probably not all that impressed with me, but the next words out of my mouth...well, she was a bit stunned. Or so it seemed.

"Hello there, Displaced from Earth. We should have a talk regarding your plans for vengeance."

Author's Note:

Beep beep!
DJSkywalker726 has asked, and I have answered!
Soon, there will be a crossover betwixt this story and his, Gravity of the situation!

Comments

[Raven]

Dis gonna be good!

[Omega Delta]

[SeventhBrony]

well, THAT is one way to get....... a moment of enlightenment, I guess

really though, there are lines where the best thing to ever happen in it would be for someone/thing to off tia

[Jirodyne]

4410699 I'll say. If she is strong enough to take on the IMMORTAL sisters, how can she not take on everything else as well?

Also, remember that Eureka your hooves now and not a blade anymore!

[Selias]

Thanks for reminding me how much I love Golden Sun. Just started playing it again.

[Novi]

I directed the mirror to the world that had sent the diamond, and there was a lurch. A girl wearing black and gold clothing was sitting, talking to her version of the Mane Six. But there was still a discordant note, a sensation of my funny bone being struck when I looked at that world.

"Show me her most probable future," I told the mirror.

Images swirled and shifted before settling on an image of...

Equestria in ruins. Canterlot in ruins. The girl standing atop the bloody, mangled corpses of two alicorns. One with an alabaster coat, and the other one a brilliant blue.

Well, this changed quite the gravity of the situation in the story for me..
Oh how I would love to see Auric interfere with her.

P.S. I think you forgot the quotation marks on Show me her most probable future,

[ArchAngelGundam]

That was fun. Looking forward to more.
Keep up the good work. Deus tecum.

[Malcho1234]

Sweet, another crossover.

[Undersider]

4412160 Nope, he was thinking it, no need for quotation marks

[Mr Swanky Hat]

"Pinkie."

i never heard of a single word conveying more meaning then that!

[booklover41]

Is there a link to the ghost rider one?

[The Collector]

5507306
Here you go.

[Razzy]

Ah, the psychopathic gravity mass murderer.

[Reishin Amara]

4412160
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