“You're putting on a shirt?” Chrysalis apparently couldn't figure out why I was bothering with the added cloth; it wasn't like Karapass hadn't already seen my bare torso.
“Why not show the proper civility?” Besides, I'd been looking for a good reason to wear the collared button-up. Rarity had put in a fair amount of time making the black garment, so it only seemed reasonable to show it off to royalty. I flashed the queen a winning smile as I tucked a pistol behind my back. Yeah, I still wasn't risking getting shot in the dick.
“Because you're you.” The changeling had a point. But unknown to her, I enjoyed putting on the air of class my cultivated accent allowed me. I slapped Chrysalis's flank and flashed her a grin as I finished fixing my clothes.
“Let's not keep your mother waiting.”
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Karapass was one of the few things on Equus old enough to remember Luna before she succumbed to the jealousy. In her long life, the Matron had seen many things others would rather avoid all knowledge of, just to keep their cushy lives afloat. Humans were one of those things, especially the magic-nullifying ones that came about every so often. Taylor was a prime example of the subspecies, matching her perceptions of the race almost flawlessly. With the frighteningly small glimpse she' had into his mind, Karapass had seen schematics she couldn't even begin to describe. With such a specimen wrapped around her horn, Chrysalis would surely inherit the title of Grand Matron.
Politics were the same everywhere, it seemed. With her life nearing its end, the exalted matriarch had to choose the daughter most likely to lead the changelings to a better existence. This meant every queen had to present the current Grand Matron with an example of their leadership capabilities, often accomplished by displaying their bodyguard. Any intelligent species on Equus could be recruited for this role, but they had to enter it willingly for their boss to have a chance at winning. Nonnative humans were unofficially the most prized, being slightly more difficult to find and gather than adolescent dragons. Thorax and Chrysalis were the only queens to have one, which would surely send jealousy through their siblings in waves.
“You're the most stubborn jackass this side of Stalliongrad.” Karapass almost jumped at hearing her youngest daughter speak as she descended the stairs, surely followed by the subject of her words. The barely-grown queen's hooves were heavy as the hit the wood, and almost masked the sound of her bipedal companion's own, whisper-soft steps. It was just as the teen's feet came into view that she heard his voice unpainted by fear.
“And you are an overgrown beetle whose only redeeming quality is her sex appeal.” There was a false gasp as Chrysalis feigned shock. The Grand Matron shook her head at their behavior, thinking neither of them had enough years to act like an old married couple. Taylor was snappily dressed in a button-up and jeans, trying to keep the formality to a minimum while simultaneously showing a business-like attitude to the entire meeting. Something seemed to bother the teen, though, and it took a few seconds for the ancient changeling to understand what it was exactly. She almost laughed when she realized the Burned Man didn't like Chrissy wearing her crown. Karapass wondered why that was, but decided she could figure it out during their talk.
“Mom, it's really nice to see you again.” Chrysalis seemed genuine in her kindness, though there was a touch of concern lacing her words. This was probably the result of her mother's maintained disguise, being so uncommon for changelings to stay hidden around each other in the Badlands. She must have inherited the sincerity from her father, being a quality that had initially attracted Karapass to the man those eighty years ago. The young queen pointed a hoof to the even younger human. “This is Taylor.”
“Charmed.” The teenager's voice held a hint of playful sarcasm, with an accent that had both a slight country twang and a bit of a Trottingham drawl. The Grand Matron could tell at least one of those qualities was fake, but was unable to determine which. The human ran a hand over his short hair, the strands too short to be properly tended. “I'm sorry about being so rude earlier, and also regret that you had to see me with your daughter.”
“Oh, relax, I'm more offended you didn't finish what you two started; I would have waited.” What Karapass didn't add was the fact that she would have watched, curious about what techniques magic-nullifying humans used on their homeworld. It would have been something to record at the very least. None of the Matron's daughters had been sired by one, so it was impossible to know such intimate details of their psychology.
“Perhaps we can sate your curiosity later.” That statement sent Karapass for a loop. She hadn't expected the human to be that perceptive, but maybe it was just a skill he hid with fantastic efficiency. The semi-smug teen was thoroughly like Pupae's father, though he was much more polite than that brute could have ever hoped to be. “But, for now, I believe you have business to discuss with your daughter?”
“Yes, and I hope that offer still stands after we get done here.” The Grand Matron winked at the magic-null, who wriggled his eyebrows in response. The two changelings chuckled at the teen's antics, glad to see humor under fire was prevalent in his mind. The air turned serious in an instant, and the three speakers adapted slightly faster. “Chrissy, as you know, is nearly time for communion.”
“Yes, and I've been dreading this since receiving your letter.” A slight question formed in the human's mind, but he kept it to himself. Karapass thought Taylor knew he would find out soon enough, or maybe he already knew and just forgot a few details. “It's between Arachni and I, isn't it?”
“Yes, and it's too evenly matched to determine a clear-enough winner to avoid any unpleasantness.” The Grand Matron sighed, knowing the fear that engulfed her wayward daughter all too well. She'd been twice Chrysalis's age when she'd been chosen, but there was still a soul-crushing that filled her heart when she'd heard the news. “I suggest you get your closest friends and ready them as best you can.”
“This is going to be horrible, isn't it?” Taylor proved to be incredible once again, or maybe that was average for his subspecies. Both Karapass and Chrysalis nodded solemnly, and the human bit back profanity. The changeling next to him noticed the behavior, and understood that he was less than enthused about entering the fray. The dethroned queen nuzzled into the teen's neck to calm him from any anger that might present itself as her mother answered his question.
“Taylor, you and some of your friends are going to fight Arachni's retinue in a battle to the death.” In that moment, Karapass was lucky her daughter was between her and the human. Berserk humans didn't die easily, and had a terrible pattern of not staying dead. “You have one week before you must arrive at our home, and you will fight two days after that.”
“Well woopty-fuckin'-doo.” Much to Karapass's delight, she now knew which aspect of Taylor's accent was fake.
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Extra – In the Shadow of the Valley
[11:24 Local Time]
“I never thought it would look like this.” Lyra was peering through the binoculars at the town dubbed Novac. At least they had a dinosaur statue, so that was a plus.
“Get used to it.” Taylor was in one of his moods again, the all-business attitude he adopted when facing something he considered serious. The large teen looked around every few seconds, pointing his .308 rifle at every noise that carried through the desert. “Maybe Manny won't shoot when he sees us coming.”
“I'm pretty sure he already sees us.” Jay pointed out the obvious fact that the NCR sniper likely had a his scope zeroed on the group. The flautist had become the posse's unofficial cash holder, and had a grand number of eighty-two caps in his satchel. Not enough for a single stimpak, but the could get a few bottles of clean water for it, or a fair bit of cheap ammo. Taylor wasn't about to sell his hunting rifle, even though he could get about two-hundred caps for it, plus ten more for the .308 rounds in the magazine. “I really don't see how we plan to survive any sort of conflict with the NCR.”
“Would you prefer we headed to the Big Empty?” Lyra and Trixie had no idea what the two were talking about, but the Big Empty sounded bad. Like crazy brains in jars bent of world domination and the good guy is an insane puppetmaster who was too scatterbrained to remember that he was a genius bad.
“Point taken. Now can we figure out what we're going to do about our money situation?” Taylor wasn't the most eloquent man in the Mojave, and he knew he was likely to draw a huge tourist markup. The didn't exactly have the amount to purchase the needed supplies their trip to Helios One would likely consume.
“Trixie could put on a show for the town.” The showmare's companions immediately put on a sour expression. It wasn't because the magician wasn't capable of putting on a decent show, it was just the lack of knowledge on how the locals would react to magic. If Jay and Taylor were resistant to the point of near negation, then the natives of this world might receive magic in the form of harmful radiation.
“We're going to need more than that.” Lyra rubbed a hoof under her chin in thought, which did little more than make her look stupid because that removed one of her legs from the equation. While she was stumped even as the motley crew walked into Novac, inspiration struck the two human in the form of Frank Sinatra. Taylor was the first to say something.
“You know, I've always liked Come Fly With Me.”