• Published 1st Apr 2016
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Group Precipitation - FanOfMostEverything


Stories set in the Oversaturated World, some silly, some less so.

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A Juicy Story, by Maran
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“And it must be a slow news day because Sonata has a story about food.” Adagio gave the camera a deadpan stare before turning to her co-anchor.

“Actually Dagi, I'm not reporting on food because it's a slow news day,” answered Sonata with a winning smile.

“Don't call me Dagi.”

Sonata shrugged. “Whatever sinks your boat. As I was saying, it's not a slow news day. This is my new segment, Sonata's Food News, where I report the latest trends in the food and restaurant business.” Staring directly into the camera, she continued, “If you've gone grocery shopping, eaten out, or bought any food at all over the past few months, you probably experienced sticker shock at how cheap it is. The reason for that is, of course, magic. Earth-aspected farmers are growing larger crops more frequently in a wider range of growing zones. A bigger supply with the same demand equals lower prices. So entrepreneurs in the food industry are developing unique new foods to make up for lost profits. Canterlot's own Berry Punch Vineyard has the new Triple Grape Surprise. I can't see it, but there should be a digitally imposed image of a giant grape next to my head. They look like plum-sized red grapes on the outside, but inside are three layers of different varieties: red, green, and purple. With three times the antioxidants and fiber, this is one super duper food! It also makes a pink wine which I've heard pairs well with desserts.

“Not to be outdone, Sweet Apple Acres created a new Cinnamon Swirl Gala Apple, which you should see to my left. What's amazing about this fruit is that the cinnamon flavor typically comes from the bark of the cinnamon tree, yet they got it to swirl inside these apples. They're planning on unveiling even more cinnamon varieties this fall.

“But it's not just earth-aspected people who are getting creative with food. Donut Joe, a unicorn-aspected baker, has the Frozen Custard Donut. As the name suggests, it looks like a regular filled donut, but the filling is frozen custard! The donut stays warm on the outside and cold on the inside. So now you can eat frozen custard for breakfast and feel only a little bit weird about it.

“Health officials and medical schools are barely beginning to study the impact of magic on human health. There is also intense debate among experts who care about such things over whether any food can truly be certified organic these days. There's no doubt that the new varieties of fruit are unnatural, but even normal-looking food is probably infused with passive magic. But I say magical people should eat magical food! Then again, I'm a humanoid sea monster, so what do I know? I'm Sonata Dusk and that's your food news for today.” She folded her hands with exaggerated primness and turned toward her co-anchor. “Back to you, Ms. Adagio Dazzle, my esteemed colleague.”

Adagio rolled her eyes. “If you're trying to get me to say that I'd prefer to be called Dagi, your efforts are wasted. I do have one question though.”

“You're going to ask me why I didn't mention tacos, aren't you?”

“No, actually I want to ask why you're here when you have your new job as a mad scientist's lovely assistant.”

“I can do both!” exclaimed Sonata in an indignant tone. “Why couldn't I do both?”

“Maybe because you can't even do one job right,” replied Adagio, smirking.

Sonata put her hand over her heart in a theatrical gesture. “You wound me, Ms. Dazzle! I thought we respected each other.”

Adagio's smirk soured as she clenched her fists. “Respect? You tazed me, your leader, and you call that respect?”

“Yep! And you're lucky the director only lets me do that once a week. Now here's Aria with the for-realsies news . . .”

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