• Published 1st Apr 2016
  • 3,584 Views, 3,021 Comments

Group Precipitation - FanOfMostEverything

Stories set in the Oversaturated World, some silly, some less so.

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Cloudy with a Chance of Bacon Bits, by Jenna Cipher and FoME



Aria gritted her teeth, fists clenched on the news desk. "Breaking weather news—"

"Wacky Weather."

"Zip it, Adagio. She's not here, we don't have to use her stupid names for things. In breaking weather news, regions worldwide have experienced showers of unicorn-shaped pieces of bacon. Sunset Shimmer has denied all responsibility. Sonata Dusk has probably claimed about twenty pounds of the stuff off of the dirty ground and I hope she gets food poisoning and a heart attack at the same time."

"Oh, be nice. We're like sisters."

"You literally grabbed the first two sirens who'd listen to your stupid idea without trying to eat you."

"Not true. Sonata listened while trying to eat me." Adagio turned back to the camera. "After earlier silence on the matter, the Carnifex Maxima Pope Ruby I has declared the bacon manna from heaven. Vegan contingents of the Church of the Divine Bacon Horse are calling for her resignation, decrying bacon as an inequine food product regardless of its divine symbolism."

Aria snorted. "They were definitely raising pigs back in the day in Nova Scoltia."


"Whatever. Her mane doesn't even look like bacon."

"You think that's going to stop them?"

"Point." Aria held a hand to her ear. "Huh? What you mean we're on live? Why didn't you say something earlier!?"

"No one has yet claimed responsibility for the event, but we'll have more as the story develops."

(Jenna Cipher)

Sunset Shimmer knew exactly who was at fault, because they'd left a note, a glass of chocolate milk, and a single cotton candy cloud right on her doorstep. Which led to now, where she sat at the same lunch table as usual, with her friends.

"Wait... So if it wasn't you, and it wasn't another one of Twilight's screw ups while trying to invent a new spell, then who was it?" Rainbow Dash questioned, ignoring Twilight's faint yell of frustration at the mention of her 'screw ups'.

Sunset sighed and launched her explanation.

At the same time, lounging around in the clouds, Discord chuckled and brought another bacon rainstorm into existence over the White House.

"Chocolate rain? What was my counterpart thinking? Bacon rain is so much more rewarding!"

Author's Note:

Jenna gets top billing since she came up with the idea first. I just though her snippet worked better as the punchline.

Also, Mr. Discord cleaned everything up shortly afterwards. This was merely a test of his capabilities. An amusing test, but a test.

Also also, any resemblance between Ruby I and a certain girl with an affinity for scythes that are also sniper rifles is entirely intentional. Pegasus-aspect, if you're curious.

Oh, and credit for the chapter title goes to MythrilMoth; it used to be "Rasher Decision."

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