• Member Since 7th Aug, 2016

Br34d


A piece of bread trying to get that cosmic butter.

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Total Words: 434,387
Estimated Reading: 1 day

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This story is a sequel to Dear Princess Sunbutt


When Anon takes the liberty to inject his particular brand of humor into Twilight's friendship lessons, Celestia feels the need to respond, more often than not.

A somewhat unofficial sisterfic to 2Merr's Dear Princess Sunbutt

There may not be a response to every letter, and letters 1-11 were taken from my comments in said sister-story.

Please support 2Merr's story too if you like this one. This is written with encouragement of the original author.

(Note: Picture used without permission from Derpibooru. Upon request it will be promptly removed.)

EDIT: Apparently someone's done a reading of this and its sisterfic over on Youtube! Why does nopony tell me these things.

Chapters (154)
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Wanted: Porter, assistant, jack-of-all-trades, minion. Applicants should be strong, loyal, pain tolerant, cold tolerant, unambitious. Must be capable of following simple instructions. Ideal applicant should be of low to average intelligence and mildly deformed, but exceptions will be made for extraordinary candidates, with extraordinariness to be determined by employer. Must be willing to begin work immediately.

Remuneration will be in the form of room, board, and insight into the true nature of the cosmos. Extremely generous bonuses up to and including subcontinents may be awarded if merited and if circumstances permit. Interviews for the position to be conducted at 108 Haybale lane at 10:00 AM sharp on 4/7. Applicants are expected to be punctual.

—The Dark Lord Sassaflash

Editing and indispensable writer-prodding by The Masked Ferret

Chapters (22)
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This story is a sequel to Equestrian Border Checkpoint


Hi, I’m Anon. I’m the asshole in the booth at the Checkpoint. See, ever since I came to the Equestrian Border Checkpoint of Manehatten, I’ve done two things. Stamp papers, and yell at people. I do both of these things really well. Now, without further ado, get your shit and get out, you’re holding up the line.

Papers Please does NOT belong to me, but there isn’t a tag for it. Sex tag is for references to sex. Also, there’s a shizzle ton of swear words. It get heckin hectic.

Amazing Cover art by LazyHooves
Chapters 1-14: The Human Arc
Chapters 15-28: The War Arc

Chapters (44)
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Equestria has thrived for millennia, led dutifully by its diarchy. Only the most capable and qualified of ponies can be responsible for such a bountiful legacy.

...

Right?


Cover Art by Jbond92

Proofread by my fantastic friends Rose Quill, Nova Quill, Heartshine Quill, RoMS Quill, Undome Quill, Regi Quill, and Wishcometrue (sadly she lacks a quill)

If you enjoyed this fic and are a fan of Fallout Equestria why not check out it's spiritual sequel, Fallout Equestria is a Very Serious AU. Also check out The Enchanted Library: The Secret Chapters and The Clocktower, three other spin-offs of a similiar vein.


"What the fuck did I just read? And why am I smiling?" - Corejo

"In any case, stories with the diarchs being generally horrible people are a hard sell for me, but this does such a brilliant job of crossing the line twice (or some much, much greater even number of times) that I'm eagerly looking forward to more." - FanOfMostEverything

Chapters (18)
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Anon decides to adopt a filly and record his experience as a Dad in a journal to do something with his life in Equestria. Except, being a father is hard work and comes at a great personal sacrifice. This is his quest to become a good father.

Chapters (8)
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You are a fierce, merciless warrior that seeks only one thing: Revenge. When you are mysteriously transported to a world of horses, they must take you to their leader for instructions on where to continue your quest.


Spanish Translation by Spaniard Kiwi


This story is contained in my book "Dash Tries to Win Your Heart and Other Short Pony Stories"

If you have interest in purchasing this non-profit book, check out my online store at this link: https://www.lulu.com/search?adult_audience_rating=00&q=flutterpriest

Chapters (1)