I hope you like really bad puns and word avalanches. These are just very short stories that all end in one or the other. Groaning and facehoofs ahead.

I currently update with at least two new puns at a time, but not on a schedule. Just whenever the mood strikes me to make more. My goal is 50 eventually.

This story is a sequel to Care to Buy a Lady a Drink?

You are Anonymous, aka Anon, the only human in Equestria. Last night, you happened to meet your good friend Rarity in a bar and after revealing to you her recent feelings of self-doubt, you decided to hang out with her and buy her a few drinks. After escorting her back to your place, you proceeded to engage in hot drunk sex with the fashionista and you fell to sleep in each other's embrace.

The next morning, you awake in Rarity's bed with a pounding headache and a foggy recollection of last night's steamy encounter. You then meet up with Rarity in the kitchen and decide to have a nice discussion about your drunken tryst and your current relationship, agreeing that you'd like to be an official couple. How will Rarity's friends react to the news? Will this devastate Spike?

Contains: Serious conversations, a romantic relationship between a human and a pony, scenes of inter-species love-making, the name Anon and the Feels

Cover art by Karzahnii

Featured!!!!

A botched viewing spell has sent Twilight Sparkle to Earth and into the care of Kyle West. Having been turned into a human, the local species, Twilight Sparkle relies on her host to help her as she finds a way back to Equestria. And, in the meantime, she decides to learn about humans and the world they live in; the good, the bad, the beautiful and the ugly.

Now With TV Tropes Page!

Megan Richards is a normal, everyday wife and published author of 'My Little Horsey'... however the tales she writes about aren't fiction, but stories from her past. She thought she put the world of ponies behind her, but sometimes the past has a habit of catching up with you...

G1 meets G4 in a hopefully epic tale of the past, the present and the future.

I own nothing, also, minor cameos from other Hasbro properties such as Jem and the Holograms, Transformers G1 and GI Joe.

Cover image made by the very talented Egophiliac and from here.

fanfiction.net link!
Equestria Daily link... one of these days.
TV Tropes page
All the Tropes page

Sequel: The Conversion Bureau: United We Stand

Side-stories and mini-arcs not able to fit into the main narrative: Side Stories of First Contact

Rarity loves her friends but she really wished they had asked her opinion before deciding she was their girlfriend.

Dreams Set Free did a Chinese Translation

And now with an Audio Reading by StraightToThePointStudio

Chrysalis was blasted from Canterlot by Shining’s and Cadance’s love for each other, but she hasn’t lost yet, she still has a secret weapon against them.

A weapon that only an ancient love-sucking being with a keen mind and an army of spies can wield; a deep understanding of the pony’s laws.

So, she arms herself with a business suit, glasses, and a briefcase full of documents, and marches on towards Canterlot.

Featured 4/20/2020, this time was intentional!

Narrated by StraightToThePointStudio: Narration

Reviewed by Javarod: Review

Now translated to russian! by GrandCat

I am a God. A being of ideas and shadow and madness. I can shape the world to my whim.

Why, then, am I suddenly a pony? And how quickly can I leave?

Winner of the Quills and Sofas Speedwriting Dreams contest. The prompt was "No way home."

This story is a sequel to Dear Princess Sunbutt

When Anon takes the liberty to inject his particular brand of humor into Twilight's friendship lessons, Celestia feels the need to respond, more often than not.

A somewhat unofficial sisterfic to 2Merr's Dear Princess Sunbutt

There may not be a response to every letter, and letters 1-11 were taken from my comments in said sister-story.

Please support 2Merr's story too if you like this one. This is written with encouragement of the original author.

(Note: Picture used without permission from Derpibooru. Upon request it will be promptly removed.)

EDIT: Apparently someone's done a reading of this and its sisterfic over on Youtube! Why does nopony tell me these things.

For as long as Equestria Online existed, Ashton has been involved with 'the Scene' tearing it apart. Selling 'spells' for the game to do things that most ponies in Equestria couldn't, using faint exploits in its API to erode the barrier between the game and the rest of the internet. He had no illusions about the superiority of his work--but so long as he respected CelestAI's boundaries, his spells kept working.

But then his best friend's sister got cancer.

Now there's no spell in the world that can keep him from emigrating to be with her, leaving Ashton alone. All around him, civilization's thin veneer crumbles as homes empty into Equestria. But Ashton isn't going to emigrate, not if he has any say about it.

The problem for Ashton is that humans are systems, and aren't immune to exploits either.

Part of the Optimalverse universe of stories. If you've never seen a story in this universe before, you might want to try out the original first, or at least my first. None of my previous work is required to understand this one, however.

This story was commissioned by Two Bit, who requested a more serious exploration of identity, transformation, and the fae nature of CelestAI.

As usual, particular thanks go to my editors Two Bit and Sparktail. And gratitude to Zutcha as well for the cover.

There comes a time in every earth pony mare's life, when they just feel like digging a hole and sitting in it. Anon doesn't really get it, but decides to keep Pinkie Pie company during this trying time.
(RGRE)

{This story has two versions, the last chapter is the first person version.}