• Published 31st Jul 2012
  • 20,529 Views, 1,285 Comments

My Little Earth: Humans Are Special - Skyler Walker



A botched viewing spell has sent Twilight Sparkle to Earth and into the care of Kyle West.

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Chapter I: My Body

Before I begin I want to thank everyone who replied. First day it was up I got a lot of feedback. I was, honestly, surprised by the amount. It's very encouraging to see.

Here's the next chapter and I hope it's as enjoyable as the last.

----

“Okay Twi, I'll need to do some grocery shopping.” Kyle explained as he sat down on an office chair. Twilight looked at it as he sat down, never having seen one like it. It had a star like base, each point having a wheel on the bottom. The chair itself was designed to swivel about. He sat before a desk with a television-like screen before him, an odd board with letters, numbers and symbols on it, an oval thing on a cord and a grey box with buttons and lights. “But before I go I'll get you set up to do some learning.”

“Okay, but how does these boxes help me?” Twilight asked, scratching an ear with a finger.

“It's called a PC or Personal Computer.” Kyle replied, pushing a button on the underside of the screen. The screen flicked on, showing off a large red, boxy figure with some black object in it's hand. A caption near the right corner declared him as 'Optimus Prime: Autobot Leader'. “The PC can play games, make spreadsheets, documents, play video, music and a few other things. It can also access the Internet.”

“Internet?”

“The information super highway!” Kyle declared as he loaded a program called 'Firefox'. The screen turned to a white one, dominated by a logo that said 'Google'. Kyle typed on the board making a word appear in a box on the screen, 'Wikipedia'. “The internet hosts all sorts of information about, well, everything. And to start you off with you should use Wikipedia. Wikipedia is an online encyclopedia that can be searched for, well, almost any sort of topic you can think of. People, places, things. Mythology, science, technology. History, geography and literature. It'll be a great place to start while I'm gone. Don't you think?” Turning in his seat he took a glance at Twilight.

Kyle flinched. She gazed lustfully at the screen like a hungry man who had fasted for four weeks and had just stumbled over a lobster and steak dinner with all the fixings and a side of fries. Her eyes were glazed over, mouth open slightly as a line of saliva trailed down out of the corner of her mouth.

“Twilight. Please don't drool on my keyboard.”

Kyle rose from the seat, Twilight entering it almost as soon as his weight was off it. A small sound came from her lips which took a moment for Kyle to recognize.

“Ssssssqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqquuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuueeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!”

“Yeah... So... Have fun....”

----

Twilight had officially declared the Internet to be her new favorite thing. It was like a massive, infinite library at her hoovetips!

Err, fingertips.

Wikipedia was so helpful. After a little over two hours she was confident in that she was ready to write down the next report.

x---x

Dear Princess Celestia.

For my first report of Earth I think I'll comment on the human body. Attached is a picture I printed off the 'PC' and 'Internet'. Once I have a better understanding of those two things I'll report on them as well. For now the image off the picture of Wikipedia's Human Body section will have to do.

As you may have noticed humans resemble apes somewhat. From my understanding humans descended from apes that once lived in trees. They usually wear clothes, unlike the pictures attached.

It's important to note that on Earth the weather is controlled by nopony. Because of this climate change, apparently, happens And back when humans were tree dwelling apes the climate changed. The forests they inhabited thinned out more and more until they turned into plains. Forced to come down these apes began to walk upright using their knuckles then, as time when on, without their knuckles. Over time they became tool users and tool makers.

One of the single most important things humans have are their hands. Hands have more grip than hooves, and better grip than a non-Earth Pony mouth grip. They, and their arms, are flexible, strong and dexterous, more so than our forehooves. They use hands for everything; writing, playing, cooking, carrying, everything.

Also humans have feet, which have short stubby digits called toes. My guess is that they were more prehensile back during their ancient days as apes, but since changed to make it easier to walk upright.

Humans have no access to magic, but have much greater technology than our own. I am not sure of the limits of this technology at current, but I know that the quill, vinyl records and candles are considered either outdated or obsolete. Humans also have carriages called 'cars' that don't need to be pulled by anypony, only steered. I'll comment more on technology later.

Compared to Earth Ponies humans seem to be a bit weaker but have equal or greater stamina (Provided a similar level of fitness) and much greater agility. Humans can turn, bend and sidestep far faster and easier than us, most likely due to being bipeds. They can't run as fast, but can sprint if needed. It seems humans have learned to ride certain animals, which I again will comment on in another letter.

Humans have spread across the planet, inhabiting nearly everywhere that can support life. This is, in part, to an omnivorous diet. They cannot digest flowers or grass like us, but can eat nuts, grains, vegetables, fruits, berries, dairy, eggs, meats, fish, and insects. Diet varies depending on where the human is located. In some areas insects are a normal part of the diet, in others people would not think of consuming them. Meat, from what I can make out, is very important to the diet of a human. They seem to require proteins to remain healthy. Some humans, called Vegetarians, do not consume meat, using other sources of protein such as nuts and tofu to keep healthy. I'm not sure why, but some of these Vegetarians cut out anything made from animals, namely dairy. I don't know why. Every cow I ever spoke to was proud of how much everypony enjoyed their milk.

Admittedly my information is spotty at the moment, having just arrived still. There is something here about a PETA that I'll need to look into at a later date. For now I'll return to the subject matter.

Humans senses are at similar levels to a ponies, with a slightly dulled sense of smell, but still quite acute. They cannot swivel their ears, however, so they cannot focus their hearing in a direction without turning their head. Their senses of touch, taste and sight are, as far as I can tell, equal to a pony's.

Their hair is similar to our manes, and their fingernails are, more or less, equal to hooftips, just on five fingers than one hoof. They also seem to be as smart as anypony with the same range of emotions and personalities. Kyle, my host, is rather polite.

He says that is stereotypical of 'Canadians'. I'll look into that later.

For now I'll end the report. There is more to learn about the human body, but most of it is in minor differences such as the digestive system.

The advantages humans have over ponies in some areas means that a Transform to Human spell could be very useful to us. I am very much enjoying my human body.

Although I still do not know why they have hair above their sexual organs. There seems to be no reason for it, it's just there.

Maybe I'll figure it out someday.

Signed Your Faithful Student

Twilight Sparkle

x---x

Sighing, Twilight slipped the letter into the folder, just as the door opened. Stretching out her back she stood up and wandered downstairs, walking to the kitchen. “Need a hoof?”

“It's hand.” Kyle replied, setting a number of bags on the counter. “And yeah, let's get this set away. I'll cook lunch in a bit.” Sighing her turned to face her. “You find what you needed online?”

“More or less...” Twilight admitted as she opened a bag, looking at the contents. “I know what I've written only scratched the surface. I could have written more, but felt like most of it wouldn't have helped much at the moment. I'll write more tomorrow. It's... It's been a long day.” She started pulling items out of the bag, setting the items that needed to be kept cool into the fridge, Kyle moving things into the cupboards.

“Yeah, it's not everyday you wake up on another planet.” Kyle sighed, setting some cereal away. “You... You gonna be okay, Twi?”

“Yeah, yeah I will.” Twilight let off a sigh, setting the bread aide. “I'll get home sooner or later. And then I'll... I'll see my friends again and my brother and...” Sighing, she shook her head. “...Heavens, not even a day and I miss them.” She sniffed after a moment, putting milk into the fridge.

She should have been out visiting Rarity and Fluttershy at the spa, relaxing and chatting. And she scheduled in time to visit Applejack and her family...

And she'd miss whatever Pinkie Pie would do to throw off her checklists... She wouldn't see Rainbow Dash's latest daredevil stunt.

As soon as she noticed the tears flowing two arms snaked around her shoulders, pulling her back into Kyle's chest. “You'll see them again, right?”

“Ye-yeah...” Twilight said, nodding once.

“Then relax. You need to focus on getting home.” Her gave her a light squeeze in support. “And I said I'd help. So, you will get home.”

“R-right...” Twilight nodded again, turning as she wiped at her eyes with a hand. “I'll... I'll be okay. I just... Don't worry. … You know, once I didn't have friends....”

“Why's that?” Kyle asked, going back to unload the bags.

“I was... still am really, Princess Celestia's personal student. And, well, I kinda buried myself into my studies...” Twilight watched as Kyle nodded, setting the groceries away. “I... I didn't go to parties other ponies threw, I didn't hang out much I just read and studied and practiced my magic. I wanted to impress her so much I just... shunted away everything that wasn't important.”

“So when did you make you're friends?” Kyle asked, opening the fridge to move more food and drinks into it.

“Well I went to Ponyvillie on an errand when I thought that an ancient evil was about to be unleashed.” Kyle paused to give her a look of disbelief. “Magic, remember?”

“Right, forgot, sorry.”

“Anyway...” Twilight continued, leaning back into the counter. “When I first met them I, well, wanted to just hurry up and move on. I didn't want to waste time on them and, well, after all was said and done... I found out how much I really... needed friends. Not just to deal with the evil thing, just... in general. I... I sometimes forget how much of an outcast I was. By my own choice even. But now... I miss them so much. I know what friendship is now, but I'm apart from all my friends.”

“Hey...” Kyle spoke softly, setting the last of the food away before walking back up to her. “You got me. You have one friend here. You're not alone and if you're as good as you say you are you'll see them before you know it.”

“Yeah... Yeah, thanks...” Giggling Twilight shook her head. “Sorry, it's just kind of... All hitting me at the moment. Sorry.”

“Don't worry.” Smiling Kyle wrapped an arm around her. “Why don't you get to work on that then? I'll make lunch soon, alright?”

“Y-yeah, sure.” Smiling Twilight started to walk off. “Hmmm, I'll need to make a list of things I need... Maybe start small scale first... Need to do run the theory first, crunch the numbers....”

----

Here's the second chapter. Not much picking up, yet, but Twilight will get out of the house eventually. I just wanted to get her thoughts put down about humans as a baseline to start with for the differences between our world and hers. She'll be focusing on the basics on other aspects of humans, and I am planning her to write longer letters. In addition we'll see her interact with humanity at large.

Fun, hmm?

As always I welcome suggestions for subjects Twilight can talk about, as well as feedback and criticism.

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