(This is a Displaced Story. If you hate them, please leave)
People don't know how agonizing it is being alone for a few thousand years, stuck in a chair the whole time. Let me tell you, it's not fun. Then, this teeny weeny 'Princess' shows up and acts like she's the boss. Oh, and Sparklebutt is there too.

So, how did this happen? It's was probably that angsty Merchant asshole. Should never have bought from him. News flash kids: when a creepy Merchant guy walks up to you with very desirable wares, walk the fuck away. It's a damn trap.

But the worst part of my endless torment? I'm a fucking corpse sitting on a golden throne, writhing in agony as I slowly decay into nothingness.

....fuck you, Merchant Asshole.

And Sparklebutt, JUST. FUCKING. STOP.

(If The Emperor Had a Text-to-Speech Device)

Tired of Luna's constant nagging, Celestia agrees to give internet dating a try. Using the website www.notforeveralone.com, Luna helps Celestia go on dates with potential immortal suitors. Shouldn't be too hard to find true love, right?

You can make a suggestion for any immortal across any manner of genre or fiction for Celestia to date next. Just make sure they're immortal for it to work.

Updates every Tuesday and Friday.

Guest chapters for immortals I have not covered are welcome, since I won't be able to write about every suggestion someone has. Note that all guest chapters are non-canon from the main story, so there is a bit of leeway to them. Talk to me over PM's for any further discussion.

Thanks to my editors The Ponytrician and Garnot for all their help!

Cover art from the hilarious tumblr you all should check out, ~Letters For Celestia~

This story is a sequel to Celestia Uses An Online Dating Website

The God Emperor of Mankind is in Equestria, and he's looking for love. Good thing for him that Celestia is looking for the same thing. The problem is that he's a warmongering immortal monarch, and she's a benevolent alicorn princess, so clearly they'll get along swimmingly. Here's hoping Equestria survives their relationship!