Twilight's POV
"So, what has happened in recent events?" The Emperor asked. I looked up at him.
"Well, today the guards caught a red unicorn with one eye trying to get into the castle. The stallion hasn't spoken since his capture, and in said capture, he managed to brutally defeat about thirty guards single hoofedly before getting captured." I told him, remembering all the broken bones and black eyes as the guards carried the strange stallion to the prison.
"Sounds interesting. Bring him here." The Emperor ordered. I looked at him in shock, my mouth hanging open.
"What?! You want to meet him?! Why!" I practically screeched.
"Because he sounds familiar, and because I haven't seen anyone except you, Arrow, Celestia, your friends, and those highly disturbing guards. I need something else to look at." He replied.
"But..." I said, before sighing. "Fine..... I'll go get him...." I muttered, before walking away.
÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷
Emperor's POV
"So, Emperor! I was digging around all those papers Twilight brought in a while ago, and found some more questions for you!" Arrow said, holding a sheet of paper in his hooves.
"Might as well." I muttered.
"Alright! Let's see here....
Amethyst Blade asks,
Emperor, why don't you just use you incredible power to come back now and show these ponies your glorious light, your female magnet physique and mighty flaming sword of mightiness?
I haven't seen you mentioned anything demonic in the Warp. You should use this opportunity before they are aware.
"To answer Amethyst, I haven't gotten out of this throne yet because my power is currently divided and also busy out in the multiverse, spreading my great wisdom to all the assholes out there. It's still regenerating, and I won't be off this thing for a few months. Or maybe years. Whichever comes first. And I'll explain the Daemonic stuff later. Next." I replied.
"Shadowsinthedark asks:
Hey Emperor have you meet any displaced yet? If you have don't feed them after midnight."
"I myself have not. My soul shards, who have had nothing better to do except scour the multiverse to spread my wisdom, however, probably have. Next."
"Manual Control asks:
So Emperor... Have you met Discord yet?"
"No, but I want to. He sounds like a fun dude." Arrow looked at me, his eyebrow raised.
"Huh. This guy's name has been redacted.... oh well. He asks:
Dear Emprah,
Does ur dick still work?
-Hard Cider"
"I'm a fucking skeleton who has been decaying for millions of years. All my muscles are fucking dead, but leaving shadow pains that hurt like hell. I am pretty sure my dick eroded away completely in the year 666 of my time here. Next." Just as arrow was about to say the next question, Twilight trotted in, with five guards surrounding a bright red unicorn in chains. A ring was stuck to his horn, and his eyes were blindfolded.
"Here he is!" Twilight said, presenting the pony. He growled, and the ring around his horn glowed, before exploding, knocking everypony away from him. When the dust settled, it revealed Magnus in his humanoid form.
"NO PATHETIC EQUINES CAN HOLD ME! Where the hell am I...... I swear, by Tzeentch, I will boil you pathetic equines in your own armor!" He roared.
"They...caught Magnus?! That is very shocking." I said, trying to contain my laughter.
"Father? FATHER?! THE CORPSE EMPEROR, MY FATHER-" Magnus growled.
"Yes yes, stop yelling so fucking loudly you Daemonic good-for-nothing book raping shitnugget." I muttered, and he growled again, his one eye seething with rage.
"How DARE you! I am at the peak of all psychic might-" He growled.
"Where the hell have I heard this before?" I asked, thinking back to the series.
"Lord Tzeentch has blessed me with powers unimaginable by mere mortals!" He boasted.
"Oh right, it was that one episode. Anyways, shut the fuck up with your empty bravado Magnus. I can sense your power strength, and it's pretty damn weak. Not to mention the fact that your 'Power' wasn't enough to stop a bunch of stupid pony guards from overwhelming you like those Ultramsmurfs. Does your power only work when you fuck something up?" I asked.
"Stop mocking me! I'm just a bit drained from the effort of breaking into this accursed dimension. You never did anything but look down upon me for my powers-" He raged, but before he could continue, I stopped him.
"I already know what you're about to say, so let's just skip to my part. You have never been in control of anything since the moment you met Tzeentch. He played with you like a puppet, didn't he. The moment you met him, you lost. He's been feeding you dirt this entire time. That boy ain't good for you, son." I told him lazily, mentally groaning from this meeting.
"I HAVE BEEN THE MASTER OF MY OWN DESTINY SINCE TZEENTCH FIRST CONTACTED ME!" He roared, and I sensed his flashback.
"While he is busy in his memory, I'm going to explain to the others about him." I told the audience, and forced a time warp.
×××××××××××××
After convincing Magnus about Tzeentch's lies and shit.
"You feel really stupid right now, don't you." I stated, looking down at him.
"Yeah... so, father, how exactly did you get to this dimension? I felt your presence out here while studying the Warp." He asked.
"Truth be told, Magnus... I'm not the Emperor." I told him.
"That's impossible. Of course your The Emperor! You are a skeleton, you've got the immense power, the same personality, of course your him!" Magnus scoffed.
"Look closer Magnus." I told him. He looked at me quizzically, before staring at me for a few minutes.
"What? I don't see anything except your normal...self.... what's this?" He asked.
"That would be my old self. I used to be a random human from the 21st century, until some creepy ass merchant came up and sold me some shit that turned me into this. I am nearly an exact copy of the Emperor, but I am not him." I explained.
"Well shit. I don't have enough power to get back to my universe, so I'm stuck here. With the false Emperor." He grumbled. Suddenly, with a pop. He returned to his pony state.
"Son of a.... Why do I keep getting turned into a damn equine?!" He roared.
"They are the sentient species of this universe. I guess it saw your weakened state and turned you into one. Oh well."
"Well, this family reunion has been fun and all, but we need to bring Magnus back to his cell." Twilight interrupted.
"No. He will stay with me." I ordered.
"But he is a criminal! He assaulted a group of guardsmen!" She shouted.
"After they tried to arrest him. He was defending himself, and plus, he's technically my son. He stays with me." I said, before shoving them out the door.
"Oh, Emperor, also, one last question!" Arrow spoke up.
"What is it?" I asked.
"Spartan889 asks:
What happens if there's a Unyuufex living in Equestria?"
"The equines will all die, thinking it's harmless." I replied.
Amethyst Blade question is blank
yay Magnus now we are all happy
yay... magnus the red... i have to ask is it sunburn or is he just coating himself in salsa or something?
6550721 I don't see it as blank...while seeing another as blank...there are probably something wrong...try different format..
By the way...how do we know when the big "ask the emperor" chapter will be post so we can throw in a bunch of question?
Oh Ye gods, Magnus. And here I am waiting for Cypher to show up.
6551125 that's because I fixed it
6551128 I tend to pool the questions that come at any time. So just ask whenever you feel like
6551206 Ok, then...I don't have any question off the top of my head yet so I will continue reading and see if i have anything
The hell is an Unyuufex? Some new genotype of Carnifex I take?
6552199
A Unyuufex is a joke made by the fans.
To put it in simple terms, a Unyuufex is a special breed of a Carnifex. But it has a tragic lifestyle because the Unyuufex wants to hug and cuddle everything but ends up killing it's victims because the Unyuufex cannot control it's strength.
Here's a image on how it looks like.
media.moddb.com/cache/images/groups/1/3/2055/thumb_620x2000/Unyuufex2.jpg
6552630
OH GODS! Kill it with fiii~hiire!!!
Oh Magnus you winny cyclop with Daddy Issues how nice to see you.
P.S Can Twillight have crush on Magnus?
P.S.S Oh great False Corps God Asshole of Mankind I ask you..... is it true that Primarhs are effect of bet beetwen you and Chaos Gods?
P.S.S.S So if you would be a true Corpse of Man Emperor of Mankind and you could reverse time. Would you try to be a "better" father. Since you know now you don't get mug for Best Father of the Year.
We seem to be missing something here...
6554193
FUUUUUUUUCK!
files.websitetoolbox.com/170892/2108141
My Emperor. What are your thoughts on the Protoss? Many have said that they are a weaker rip off of eldar but I simply can't see it.
Their idea of peace and happiness is not massive galaxy-wide crazy orgie but the peak of technological advancement and evolution.
They don't have the look and the biology of the eldar. They don't use the Warp anywhere in their techs and powers. Also, their FTL travel is a lot better than the many Terran factions and that many Terran factions have better FTL travel than the Imperium. Huh...I almost going on a tangent again.
Hope I didn't start a flame war.
Last line. HA.
Emperor, I bring great news to you. Recently on my journey to the badlands I have seen sightings and found solid evidence of the Reasonable Marines existence here in Equestria. They seem to have station themselves at the North-side of the badlands where the changeling hives resides. It could be possible they integrated the changelings into their society. Will you truly take command and lead them into a new age of prosperity?
eeehhhhh, i dunno man. im not really feeling the whole "do what the original series did almost chapter by chapter." i guess i thought this was the emperor in a mostly cannon equestrian universe not an au that has an inquisition and all that.
(a new challenger approaches)
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