Dear A.K. Yearling,
I can't believe you were going to quit being Daring Do just because your name was being dragged through the mud down in Somnambula. Luckily for you, Pinkie and I made sure that Dr. Caballeron was uncovered and now you won't quit going on adventures and giving me the TLC I need afterwards.
Love Always,
Rainbow Dash
P.S. How much of a cut will I get from the sales of this book? Hell you still owe me a cut from the last one I took part in! Sorry A.K. but "fun" alone isn't going to pay the bills!
Dear Rainbow,
Look, I just write the books. If you want to talk about your cut, contact this Starlight Glimmer pony since GlimGlam Publishing now publishes and distributes my books. From what I understand you two are friends so getting "your cut" shouldn't be too hard.
Sincerely,
A.K. Yearling
P.S. What, are you telling me that you don't want to have fun anymore? What happened, is that pink friend of yours or that Spitfire you are always going on and on about better? Oh well, I'm sure I can do better than you anyway.
Dear Starlight,
I know you are the publisher of the Daring Do books. I contacted A.K. about getting my cut but she said to contact you. So I am demanding my cut. If you don't pay me what you owe me, I'll try and seduce Trixie, alright?"
Demanding My Money,
Rainbow Dash
Dear Rainbow,
Guess what, to receive your "cut," you would have had to have a notarized contract between GlimGlam Publishing, A.K. Yearling and yourself. While my records show that you do have one with A.K., you do not have one with GlimGlam Publishing so good luck getting any money from this. Perhaps you should go beg A.K. for money since you do have a contract with her!
Sincerely,
Starlight Glimmer (Owner of GlimGlam Publishing)
P.S. Before she has a chance to bitch to me about this, tell Pinkie Pie this. I don't need her whining over money causing me any undue stress. Oh and on a final note, Trixie would never hook up with the likes of you. I am the embodiment of perfection and I love her so she'd never leave me.
Dear Starlight Glimmer,
FIFTY BITS? You are charging fifty bits for the most recent Daring Do book? When it was published by Manehattan Publishing, it only cost thirty bits! I know you are celebrating your tax exempt status by overcharging for books but please, this is highway robbery! Now I am demanding twenty bits back or I will file a lawsuit against you for overcharging me!
Upset I Was Cheated,
Princess Celestia
Dear Princess Celestia,
I get it, you're up there shitting bricks because of the cost of the latest Daring Do book. Look, A.K. Yearling is a good author and has requested that I charge more so she can be paid more for her work. Also, if I remember correctly, you purchased the extended version with all the deleted chapters in it so of course it will be more.
Go ahead and try suing me. Yes I know you are the head princess in Equestria but any judge in his or her right mind will throw your case out and probably laugh you straight out of the courtroom. A word of advice, if you don't want to pay good money next time, don't buy the extended version!
Best Regards,
Starlight Glimmer (Owner of GlimGlam Publishing)
Dear Princess Celestia,
I have come to the conclusion that my good friend Starlight is nothing but a greedy bitch. Ever since she created this GlimGlam Publishing, she has been raking in the profits and won't even pay me rent for living in the castle! Even worse, I had to pay fifty bits for the new Daring Do book and for Faust's sake, I know A.K. Yearling. What should I do? Should I make her pay me rent? Should I kick her out or should I simply torture her until she gives me my money back?"
Upset at Starlight,
Princess Twilight Sparkle
Dear Princess Twilight,
Look, there isn't anything I can do. I had to pay the same amount and given that she owns the company and she has a contract with A.K. Yearling, they work together on what to charge. I know that A.K. normally wouldn't be that greedy but hey, Starlight is a businesspony now and she likely won't be generous like Rarity anymore. Just beg her to let you join her and Trixie and that should be sufficient.
Sincerely,
Princess Celestia
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Do I ram the Twicane down Starlights throat yet?
9177268
Now why would you want to ram the Twicane down Starlight's throat?
9177430
Cause she never gave the princesses their 90% discounts when she opened her publishing company. BY LAW all companies have to give the princesses a 90% discount on ALL their products, including any and all sexual gratification that does not exceed any legal boundaries.
Plus I figured if I rammed it up her ass she would've just moaned
9177440
Starlight is a businesspony and has a belief that nopony, and I mean NOPONY, is deserving of any kind of discount solely because of their status. For them to get a discount, it would have to be given by Daring Do herself. Hey, the mare is trying to make a living and despite being able to just make the books easily, she is a capitalist at heart by this point.
9177549
And yet all the world gets ruined by capitalism
Daring Done: it's about time Twilight would start charging Starlight for rent. It's not like she can't afford it. And, it's Celestia fault for not taxing Starlight Glimmer like everyone else.
9673268
Celestia has her reasons for not taxing Starlight and while Twilight bitches about Starlight raking in the profits, she knows she can't just go charging Starlight rent without there being any repercussions.