Unpleasant Correspondence

by StormLuna

Filli Vanilli

Dear Princess Horrid Voice,

Remember that ballad you sang when you ascended me? I know that you thought you sounded so sexy when you did it but you didn't. I have found a pony with the sexiest singing voice ever, PETA girl. Yep, my acquaintances and I caught her singing and I got wet simply hearing her. You have no idea how hard it was for me to not just issue an executive order, lead her to the library and initiate her but I figured that with her, I want it to be real because after hearing her sing, I may want more than friendship someday.

Of course Rarity wanted her to sing with her little group but Fluttershy has stage fright. I'm beginning to think she won't let me initiate her because she is scared of the upstairs of the library. Mark my words though, one day I will bag her and she will realize that Rarity simply isn't all that good.

Now for the bad thing that happened, Big Mac lost his voice and Rarity's group needed a deep voice so they had Fluttershy drink poison joke so she would sound like a deep voiced stallion. Ugh, at that moment I was turned off by her and as long as she sounds like a dude, no way in hell would I try and initiate her. I do have standards after all and a mare that sounds like a stallion is way below them. I like my mares sounding like mares, as they should.

Now what was truly horrible is Fluttershy had that deep voice for days until Big Mac's voice finally got better, Fluttershy was exposed for singing for him and then she drank the antidote for poison joke. Once again she sounded like her sweet, sexy self and I wanted to initiate her so bad. I even approached her over it multiple times and she continued to shoot me down. Does that little bitch not know what she is missing? If she would just give me a chance, she would never want to screw Rarity ever again.

I'll be honest, if she ever does decide to put out for me, I'm certain she'd want a whole lot more than friendship with me. If she wanted that, staying in this dump would definitely be worth it.

Wanting PETA Girl,

Princess Twilight Sparkle

---

Dear Fluttershy,

Please, just give me a chance. I know that if you do, you will realize how much better than Rarity I am and just think about it this way, you could wind up becoming the marefriend of a PRINCESS! Being the marefriend of a princess would offer a lot more perks than being a friend with benefits to a sub-par dressmaker.

Wanting You,

Princess Twilight Sparkle

---

To My PETA Girl Wanting Princess,

Oh good grief, get over it already. You will never get Fluttershy in your bed and the fact that you honestly think she would want to even be friends, much less marefriends, with you shows that you are completely delusional. I get it, you think she is sexy and you want her so bad you can hardly stand it.

I do agree with you, she is hot but unlike you, I don't have any dreams or desires to get her in bed. I think you really need to get over her just like Spike needs to get it through his thick skull that he'll never score with Rarity. Is it something with individuals who live in trees? Is it something with you that you want to "befriend" those who you know you'll never have a chance with?

Just leave Fluttershy alone, go to the spa and let your troubles be forgotten, alright?

Equestria's Best Princess,

Princess Celestia

---

Dear Twiskank,

What part of no do you not get? You constantly ask me if you can "initiate" me and I say no. Now why in the hell would you think I would want to be your marefriend? I think I know why, it is because you just want an excuse to get into my coat whenever you want. Forget that, I have Rarity and she treats me like a queen.

I have some advice for you Twibitch, you have the spa twins so just so screw them and leave me the hell alone. Face it, you will NEVER initiate me, never.

Wishing You'd Leave Me Alone,

Fluttershy

---

Dear Fluttershy,

I am so happy that you finally decided to join the Ponytones and share that beautiful voice with everypony the same way you share that sexy body of yours with me. Don't worry, I won't make you perform all the time but every time you do, I'll let you dominate me and be incredibly rough. How does that sound?

Wanting You Like Always,

Rarity

---

Dear Rarity,

Seriously, you'll let me dominate you and be rough with you every time I perform? Sweet, I'll perform every time then and after that, I'll rock your world, got that sexy girl?

Ready to Dominate You,

The Sexiest Pegasus Ever, Fluttershy

Author's Note:

The Prelude to lots and lots of "fun!"

Comments

[Speedy Silverstreak]

For Christ sakes Fluttershy!
Just let Twilight have sex with you so she stops! Just pretend you like it then file for sexual harassment

[Ponyninja88]

9003740
You know i get the feeling that at some point Fluttershy is going to make a deal with Twilight, that amounts to Fluttershy sleeping with her on the condition that Twilight never bothers Fluttershy about it again, only to enjoy it and Twilight holds up her end of the bargain, leaving Fluttershy frustrated.

[aline1]

I am going to laugh if by the time Fluttersky ever does consider giving twilight something to get her to leave her alone twilight no longer has any interest because twilight finally found a serious relationship with bonus laughter if freaks out everyone else to the point they think she's been replaced by a changeling, gotten possessed or being mind controlled.

[StormLuna]

9004197

Oh she will, eventually!

[Dashie04]

I love that Fluttershy’s apparently a top.